“What?” Shen Du’s face darkened, a flicker of light passing through his pupils. “Say that again?”
Jing Lin felt a chill run down his neck. He bowed and apologized first, “This subordinate deserves death for failing to protect Madam.”
“Spare me the nonsense. Where is she now?”
Jing Lin raised his head and pointed behind Shen Du. Shen Du immediately turned to look. On the main street, Zhu Yan was running towards them, panting heavily, occasionally wiping sweat from her brow with her sleeve. Her red lips were slightly parted, and her small face was flushed crimson, having run all the way.
Shen Du’s mood instantly soured. He gave Jing Lin a sharp flick on the forehead and growled, “I’ll deal with you later. Guard this place for me.”
With that, he ran down the steps to meet Zhu Yan.
Zhu Yan indeed hadn’t expected Jing Lin to disregard his orders, leaving the critically ill Pan Chi to deliver the message to Shen Du so quickly. She was running with her head down when she suddenly collided with a wall of flesh. Smelling the familiar scent, she finally became flustered.
Shen Du’s arm encircled her, seeing her rubbing her nose, eyes red, head bowed, not daring to look up. His heart softened a bit, swallowing the words of rebuke, just glaring at her silently.
Zhu Yan’s panic lasted only a moment. Quickly remembering Pan Chi’s body covered in white threads, she summoned her courage, raised her head to glare at Shen Du, and said angrily, “Shen Du, let go of me.”
Very well, now she wasn’t even calling him husband, addressing him directly by name.
Shen Du’s face darkened further. “Where does Madam intend to go?”
“I…”
Zhu Yan’s courage drained faster than the Yellow River. Seeing no point in hiding it, she decided to speak her mind.
“We can wait, but Pan Chi can’t. Let me go.”
Seeing her so stubborn, Shen Du nearly fainted from anger. After several deep breaths, he barely managed to control his emotions without exploding on the spot.
Zhu Yan, seeing him still holding onto her, began to struggle.
Shen Du gritted his teeth and said word by word, “Do you know that going out there is suicide?”
Did Zhu Yan not know? She knew very well, but between watching Pan Chi die and going to her death, she resolutely chose the latter.
Seeing her stubborn silence, Shen Du said no more. He simply picked her up in his arms.
On the street, there were patrolling officers and soldiers, guards on the city walls, and citizens in twos and threes, all turning to look.
“You put me down.”
“I need to save Pan Chi, there’s no time, he’s dying.”
“I’ll offer myself as a hostage in exchange for the antidote.”
“Wuwuwu…”
Zhu Yan kicked and hit Shen Du, caught up in the emotion of Pan Chi’s impending death, crying out hysterically.
Shen Du endured it all, quickening his pace. Only when they returned to their room did he set Zhu Yan down.
As soon as she was steady, Zhu Yan pounded on Shen Du’s chest, glaring at him, and shouted, “Pan Chi’s condition is critical. If he doesn’t get the antidote soon, he’ll surely die.”
Thinking of how such a vibrant person would soon lose his life, Zhu Yan began to cry.
Shen Du’s heart ached, but more than that, he felt a sense of self-doubt. When had Zhu Yan ever cried like this for him?
“It’s entirely because of me that he’s in this state. If he dies before my eyes, how could my conscience bear it?” Zhu Yan was so agitated she almost lost her voice.
Pulling Zhu Yan into his embrace, Shen Du’s heart was a tangle of complex emotions, bitter and hard to express.
He forcibly restrained himself from lashing out, though his tone still carried considerable anger: “Do you realize that if you go out there, you’re walking straight to your death?”
“So be it if it’s death. What of it?” Zhu Yan said, her eyes brimming with tears.
Shen Du’s iron-strong heart was doused in ice water. He said hoarsely, “You would throw away your life for Pan Chi?”
Zhu Yan choked, “If he dies, I bear the responsibility. I can only repay a life with a life.”
Another arrow pierced Shen Du’s heart, aching fiercely. He endured it, his hands trembling as he cupped Zhu Yan’s face. His eyes were deep pools of roiling emotions as he shouted at her:
“Is Pan Chi’s life the only one that matters? What about the lives of the Zhu family? What about your master’s life? What about the lives of the millions of people in Yingzhou?”
If you die for Pan Chi, what about me? Would you leave me to live alone?
Zhu Yan’s lips parted slightly, staring blankly at Shen Du’s angry face, too frightened to speak.
Shen Du felt some regret and reached out to wipe Zhu Yan’s tears, but she dodged. His eyes darkened, his heart bleeding.
They stared at each other. Zhu Yan recalled the various emotions in her interactions with Shen Du recently, including his rough confession that day when he was furious.
She knew Shen Du wasn’t one to casually speak words of love, nor was he fond of women’s company. Those words he spoke must have carried some truth.
But today, she didn’t want to put her personal feelings above Pan Chi’s life.
If it weren’t for her, how could he have ended up in such a state?
Since it was because of her, she must save him.
Shaking her head to cast aside all reluctance, Zhu Yan stood on tiptoe, clinging to Shen Du’s shoulders, looking into his eyes, wanting to memorize him.
“This time is different,” her voice trembled, but she paused, regaining her composure, “A life hangs in the balance. Moreover, Pan Chi is in this state because of me. Even if I have to exchange my life for his, so be it.”
These words, spoken after careful consideration, struck Shen Du’s heart, each word drawing blood.
He was momentarily stunned, and Zhu Yan immediately took advantage of his distraction to take a step forward.
But he caught her wrist, pulling her back.
Looking at the face before her, Zhu Yan pressed her lips together, not daring to say another word, afraid she might change her mind.
“Have you forgotten you’re Madam Shen?” Shen Du pulled her close with a wicked smile, looking down at her, and declared firmly, “You’re my Shen family’s wife. Your life isn’t yours to do with as you please. It’s for me to decide.”
Zhu Yan smiled. Shen Du had always been this domineering, always using her status as Madam Shen to pressure her. In the past, she had always been unhappy, feeling Shen Du was too overbearing. But now, hearing this forceful declaration, her heart inexplicably sweetened.
Shen Du had acknowledged her status as Madam Shen.
Zhu Yan untied a bronze whistle from her waist and placed it in Shen Du’s palm.
The bronze whistle was intricately carved with beautiful patterns, with the Shen family’s unique mark engraved on the inside.
Opening his palm, Shen Du met Zhu Yan’s gaze with a thin veil of anger.
“If I can return alive, then my life is yours to do with as you please.” Their hands were still together. “What I owe you, if I can’t repay in this life, then in the next, alright?”
As she finished speaking, Zhu Yan withdrew her hand from Shen Du’s. He tried to grab it, but Zhu Yan’s hand was as slippery as if coated in honey, like the elusive fate and destiny he couldn’t grasp.
The bronze whistle lay in his palm, clutched tightly by Shen Du.
Zhu Yan turned and ran, tears blurring her vision. She had said all this; surely Shen Du wouldn’t stop her now.
No matter what, she had to try.
Shen Du suddenly reached out, pulling her back into his embrace from behind. Anger and tenderness surged in his heart, all converging in this small bronze whistle.
This woman, how she tormented his heart.
“Can’t you leave this matter to me?” His voice was low, resting against Zhu Yan’s neck, full of helplessness. “Can’t you entrust it to your husband? Can’t you trust your husband?”
Zhu Yan shook her head, still struggling. How could she be so selfish as to send Shen Du to his death?
But with her strength alone, she couldn’t break free from Shen Du’s embrace.
Fearing Zhu Yan might hurt herself struggling, Shen Du suddenly released his hold, letting her go.
Zhu Yan, gaining her freedom, rushed towards the door without a second thought, not daring to look back.
“Are you really determined to exchange your life for Pan Chi’s?”
Zhu Yan stopped and turned to look at him.