As night settled in, the laughter of intoxicated disciples gradually faded. Bai Ligelin silently observed Lu Li before her. Perhaps to avoid revealing their conflict to other fellow disciples, he had remained behind without a word, but he stood there like a mountain, not sparing her a glance.
She furrowed her brow, scrutinizing the man before her for the first time. Upon closer inspection, he did indeed differ slightly from other locals of the Eastern Sea. His skin was darker, and his features more defined. The Eastern Sea region was home to countless tribes, as numerous as stars in the sky. The so-called Jiu Feng Tribe must be one of them, which explained the Nine-Headed Bird pendant he always wore around his neck.
After a moment of contemplation, Bai Ligelin spoke, “Senior Brother Lu, I know nothing of the Jiu Feng Tribe. If I’ve unknowingly violated any of your tribal customs, please forgive my ignorance.”
Lu Li’s gaze remained fixed on the lantern tassels behind her, unmoving and silent.
Bai Ligelin stepped back and bowed respectfully, “I understand that my frivolous attitude has offended you, and I know I was too forceful last time. This is my final sincere apology to you. My regret is genuine, and after this, I won’t bother you again.”
She waited for a while, but receiving no response, she finally let out a long sigh. She turned to gaze at the moon on the horizon and began to walk away.
“Do all women from the Central Plains enjoy imposing their will on others?” Lu Li suddenly spoke coldly behind her. After a month of silence, his first words were akin to an accusation. Bai Ligelin turned back in surprise, “Your words are profound. I don’t quite understand.”
Lu Li crossed his arms and looked at her. After a while, he said softly, “Why do you keep apologizing to me? What do you hope I’ll forgive?”
Bai Ligelin pondered for a moment, “I offended you, so you treated me as if I were invisible. That’s why I’m apologizing.”
Lu Li replied calmly, “You haven’t offended me. Your insistence on my forgiveness is merely to ease your conscience.”
Bai Ligelin’s brow furrowed again. After a long contemplation, she said softly, “If I haven’t offended you, then it seems we’re simply incompatible. I suppose I was indeed presumptuous. Senior Brother Lu, do you truly dislike me?”
“How do you want me to answer? What do you hope I’ll do?” Lu Li asked, his voice eerily calm.
“Of course, I hope we can interact normally as fellow disciples, laughing and talking like before. But my hopes are irrelevant; these decisions should be yours to make.”
Suddenly, Lu Li strode towards her, stopping just inches away. He lowered his head, staring intently into her eyes. Bai Ligelin returned his gaze steadily, feeling as though his eyes were bottomless pits. She couldn’t help but feel a twinge of fear.
After a moment, he suddenly chuckled and placed his hand on her shoulder, saying softly, “Deliberately pursuing me with apologies, and now speaking with such ambiguity. When have we ever laughed and talked before? Are you concerned about my attitude? What’s this, do you care about me? What reassurance are you trying to get from me? Do you think you can use my feelings to comfort yourself? Is this how you’ve always flitted between men? You cunning little girl, you’re barely sixteen or seventeen. Do you think you understand the human heart so well?”
Bai Ligelin’s anger flared instantly. She glared at him fiercely for a long while before coldly responding, “Senior Brother Lu, since we can’t see eye to eye, let’s part ways here. I won’t exchange another word with you from now on.”
She turned to leave, but Lu Li grabbed her shoulder and spun her back around. His dark eyes mocked her as he said, “Since we’re talking, let’s lay it all out. Now that I’ve exposed your true intentions, you want to run away in anger. Is this the extent of your courage?”
Bai Ligelin’s face turned ashen, “I don’t know what you’re talking about! Do you find joy in falsely accusing others?”
“You know very well whether what I’m saying is true or not.”
She coldly avoided his piercing gaze, but deep in her heart, there was a sense of embarrassment at having her secret exposed.
Perhaps he wasn’t entirely wrong, revealing motives she hadn’t even recognized herself. She wasn’t as naive as Li Fei; over time, she had naturally become aware of Lu Li’s unique attitude towards her. She couldn’t quite pinpoint why she kept pursuing him for apologies. Was it because she knew he liked her and hoped he could alleviate her loneliness? Or was she trying to use him to distance herself from her emotional entanglement with Ye Ye?
Even when she had asked him to hold her that time, wasn’t it born from the same mindset? Deep down, she knew Lu Li wouldn’t refuse her. He liked her.
In her subconscious, there truly was a despicable side she couldn’t believe, didn’t want to believe, and refused to contemplate further.
Bai Ligelin wearily rubbed her temples. Her voice was low and tired as she said, “…I’m sorry.”
“All apologies in this world are merely to ease one’s conscience. You can test whether I’ll forgive you or not.”
Bai Ligelin smiled bitterly, “How do you plan to not forgive me? Beat me up?”
Lu Li remained silent. The hand on her shoulder suddenly lifted her chin. He spoke softly, “What do you want to hear from me? That I like you? That I’m willing to be trampled by you, coming when called and leaving when dismissed, adoring you like a lowly servant?”
Bai Ligelin avoided his hand, her brows furrowed tightly, “Why say more? From now on, let’s just continue as strangers.”
Lu Li stared at her silently, then suddenly pinched his chin. Without another word, he walked away with a cold smile.
Ji Tongzhou pushed open the window. The sky was still that thin, transparent blue of dawn. He meticulously adjusted his collar and belt in front of the bronze mirror. The disciples’ robes of Xing Zheng Hall were a uniform tea-white color, with gold-trimmed collars and cuffs, giving off an air of elegance that particularly suited him.
He took out a slightly worn wooden comb from his pocket and carefully combed his long hair. Having not slept all night, there was a thin layer of dark shadows under his eyes, giving the eighteen or nineteen-year-old youth in the mirror a somewhat gloomy appearance.
After tying up his hair, he opened the door and instinctively glanced upstairs. The disciples of Wu Yue Yan lived on the upper floor. She was there too.
Ji Tongzhou paused, leaning on the railing, lost in thought for a long time. The voices of people gradually grew louder in the inn, above and below. As daylight broke, it was time for the mountain sect disciples who had come to the Eastern Sea to return. Other sect disciples kept coming down the stairs.
Soon, he saw Jiang Li Fei and Lei Xiuyuan.
She probably hadn’t slept well last night and kept rubbing her eyes, walking unsteadily. Lei Xiuyuan was talking to her in a low voice, and she alternated between nodding and shaking her head. As they descended the stairs, he put his arm around her waist to support her.
No matter how one looked at it, they appeared to be a young couple that others envied. Passersby kept stealing admiring or amazed glances at them.
Ji Tongzhou stared at them for a long time before slowly making his way downstairs.
Li Fei’s eyes were stinging. She had been dead drunk last night and felt as if she had just fallen asleep when Lei Xiuyuan dragged her up to wash and dress. She was so tired she could fall asleep while walking. They still had to fly for four or five days to return to their sect. This was terrible; what if she fell asleep mid-flight and dropped from the sky?
The inn’s lobby was packed with people. Li Fei leaned against the wall, her head constantly nodding off. Despite the clamor of voices around her, she felt she was about to fall asleep again.
Suddenly, two plain steamed buns wrapped in oiled paper appeared before her. They must have been bought by Lei Xiuyuan. Li Fei took them, saying thanks, and took a big bite, choking a little. She whined coquettishly, “I need some water.”
Soon, a cup of warm tea was handed to her. Li Fei quickly ate a bun and drank the hot tea, gradually regaining her spirits. She turned to offer the bun to Lei Xiuyuan, smiling, “You should also…”
Before she could finish, she realized the person leaning against the wall beside her was Ji Tongzhou. She was stunned and looked around, only to see Lei Xiuyuan standing next to Elder Guang Wei, engaged in conversation.
“Oh, you bought these.” Li Fei smiled and offered the remaining steamed bun to Ji Tongzhou. “Thank you. Have you eaten?”
Ji Tongzhou shook his head and pushed the bun back to her without a word. He just kept looking down at her. Li Fei was in the middle of taking a bite when she felt his gaze fixed on her. Bai Ligelin’s words from last night suddenly echoed in her mind, and she instinctively moved away from him a bit, laughing awkwardly, “I… I’ll go over there and take a look.”
Before she could take a step, Ji Tongzhou suddenly grabbed her arm. Li Fei panicked a little and immediately wanted to struggle free, but felt it might not be appropriate. She tried to pull her arm away gently, but he wouldn’t let go. Li Fei sighed inwardly and turned back with a bright smile, “Ji Tongzhou, is there something you need?”
Ji Tongzhou’s gaze traveled from her face to her neck, where faint red marks were barely visible behind her collar. His hand unconsciously tightened, as if he wanted to crush her arm bones, but he quickly relaxed his grip.
People around them were laughing and talking. Outside, someone was calling for the Xing Zheng Hall disciples to leave. All of this sounded distant to his ears. In his life until now, there had never been anything he wanted but couldn’t have. He had already lost her once in an illusion. Should he let go of this hand now? She wasn’t his woman, but someone else’s. That person was both friend and foe.
Ji Tongzhou found himself hesitating, a rare occurrence for him. He couldn’t tell if this was right or wrong. He had been pondering this for days but couldn’t conclude.
The struggle in his hand grew stronger. Ji Tongzhou snapped back to reality to see Li Fei smiling, though her eyes showed a hint of rejection. She was trying to discreetly free herself from his grip. Ji Tongzhou looked at her for a long time before suddenly speaking, “Jiang Li Fei, you’ll remember me, won’t you?”
Li Fei was surprised by his sudden question. After a moment’s thought, she answered cautiously, “You’re all my friends. Of course, I’ll remember you.”
Ji Tongzhou smiled faintly and released her hand. He stood up and walked towards the exit, “I’m returning to Xing Zheng Hall. Farewell.”
Li Fei sighed in relief and smiled, “Go on then. See you next year.”
Ji Tongzhou had one foot out of the inn when he suddenly turned back swiftly. He gripped Li Fei’s shoulders and bent down to plant a firm kiss on her stunned lips.
The surrounding voices faded away, only to grow clamorous again moments later. Ji Tongzhou kissed her lips fervently. His time was running short, but he wanted so much more. The wild desires awakened within him gnawed at him like venomous snakes. The intense fire in his heart had been ignited, and no one could extinguish it. No one.
He bit down hard on her lower lip, almost instantly drawing blood.
“…Remember me more clearly.” Ji Tongzhou gave her an odd smile, placed the purple jade cricket in her arms, and then turned and left without looking back.