The weapons in the hands of the imperial guards cast a pale reflection on Fu Yi Xiao’s face as she sat against the rocky cliff. She remained still, her eyes lowered, gently plucking the string of her silver bow to keep time. Her song, so quiet and faint, seemed all the more heart-wrenching:
“Day after day, month after month,
How swiftly they pass, how they diminish.
My heart is filled with sorrow,
As if I cannot wash away this stain.
In quiet contemplation,
I find I cannot take flight.”
She finished the last word very slowly, then struggled to her feet using the bow as support, looking up at the sky against the wind.
Ning Fei could barely hold back the tears in his eyes.
Yi Xiao, his childhood friend, his comrade-in-arms for three years, the one to whom he could entrust his unguarded back with just a glance – what kind of determination had driven her to such a tragic state?
Xiao Weiran’s voice carried a note of helplessness, “Yi Xiao, if you surrender and plead guilty, Ning Fei and I will surely beg His Highness for leniency on your behalf. But if you persist in this course, you’ll truly be forcing us into an impossible position.”
Fu Yi Xiao, her clothes fluttering in the wind, listened quietly to his words without responding. She simply slung the silver bow over her back and lowered her head, struggling to straighten her disheveled clothes with her uninjured hand. Her deep eyes held nothing but boundless emptiness.
Ning Fei’s eyes had long since reddened with urgency. He thrust his sword into the ground and shouted, “Get down from there right now, or I’ll lose my temper!”
“You should understand. When I came here today, I had no intention of leaving alive,” Yi Xiao finally spoke, her voice low and hoarse. As Ning Fei froze in shock, Xiao Weiran let out a soft sigh, his voice softening, “Come down – Ning Fei and I will find a way to mediate for you. We won’t let you…”
“I know,” Yi Xiao interrupted, her smile still warm. “But I don’t want to thank you. Knowing you both has been enough for this lifetime… I have something I want to tell His Highness, and then I’ll come down – Ning Fei, come here.”
Ning Fei walked towards her without hesitation. Yi Xiao watched him approach, her gaze clear as water. “Tell His Highness for me, never to forget me – tell him to be prepared, for I will haunt him for all eternity!” With that, she yanked out the iron arrow piercing her shoulder blade and threw it into Ning Fei’s arms, then turned and leaped off the cliff.
‘Your Highness, since you cannot give me the love I desire, then let me control your very being, forcing you to remember me, Fu Yi Xiao, for a lifetime, etched into your very bones.’
Ning Fei froze for a moment, then tossed aside the arrow and fell to his knees at the cliff’s edge, cursing at her retreating figure: “Damn you, Yi Xiao! What are you doing? How could you just abandon us and die alone like this? You idiot!!!”
Even the imperial guards participating in the search were stunned by this tragic scene. Xiao Weiran closed his eyes and sighed towards the sky before finally ordering, “Let’s go back and report – bring that arrow too.” Only then did the others react. A guard timidly retrieved the arrow from behind Ning Fei, and then hurriedly followed Xiao Weiran down the mountain. Soon, only Ning Fei remained sitting at the cliff’s edge, facing the wind.
Why did you do this? Why, after so many years, do I still not understand you? Why can’t I comprehend you as Weiran does…
“Yi Xiao,” Ning Fei cried out to the heavens. Countless echoes reverberated across the valley – “Yi Xiao… Yi Xiao…” – fading into the distance until they could no longer be heard.
At the foot of the cliff, Xia Jingshi’s hand trembled slightly as he took the blood-stained iron arrow. Xiao Weiran’s mechanical description still rang in his ears, and a sudden, sharp pain gripped his heart. He seemed to see Yi Xiao looking up at the sky – was it to hide her tears?
Xiao Weiran heaved a long sigh, “Ning Fei is still up there – he and Yi Xiao were close, so… he probably won’t come down for a while… Yi Xiao wanted him to tell Your Highness that she will haunt you for all eternity.”
Xia Jingshi clutched the arrow tightly, frozen for a long while before softly giving the order, “Turn back. We’re returning to Lu City…”
Ten days later, news spread throughout the Jinxiu Dynasty that Prince Xia Jingshi of Zhennan had fallen gravely ill halfway through his journey to Susha Country to marry, forcing him to return to Lu City to recuperate. The marriage alliance was indefinitely postponed.
Fu Yi Xiao did not die. Her gravely injured body drifted in the rushing river at the bottom of the valley, occasionally colliding with rocks protruding from the water, but she never attempted to climb out. If her heart was dead, what use was there in preserving this body?
Suddenly, a rope flew from the side and looped around her neck. She immediately struggled to break free from the noose. ‘Don’t save me, unless you are him.’
Ignoring her resistance, the rope pulled her in, bit by bit, until she was finally dragged onto the shallows. She found herself looking into a pair of curious and concerned eyes. “Oh? You’re not dead?”
“Why did you save me?” Yi Xiao asked weakly, her strength spent.
“Idiot, if I hadn’t saved you, you really would have died!” Ling Xueying rolled her eyes as she untied the rope from Yi Xiao’s neck.
Returning to the Fu family was no longer an option, so after her wounds healed, Yi Xiao went with Xueying to the Ling family. There, all the maidservants walking about the courtyard were beautiful, with downcast eyes and light footsteps. Xueying’s father, the City Guard of Cang City, was a chivalrous man who had left the jianghu world to join the court for the sake of his wife and daughter. After hearing Yi Xiao’s story from Xueying, he simply said, “To be happy, one must learn to let go.”
Let go – two words so easily spoken, yet so difficult to achieve.
The extremes of love and hate tormented her uncontrollably. She mounted her silver bow on the wall and began indulging in sensual pleasures and worldly games. For four years, drinking and singing became her means of release. “Pingling’s Xueying, Beauty’s Yi Xiao” became the most talked-about topic among the young masters of Pingling. However, the desolation that followed when the music ended and the crowd dispersed always clung to her. The loneliness of each long night made her once-wounded heart even more empty, for no one around her was him.
This unhealed, shattered heart was something she dared not touch, for even the lightest brush would cause intense pain. The slightest glimpse would reveal that it was filled with his image, and the slightest pressure would spill out an ocean of longing. The string of missing him was wound too tight, unable to withstand any more tension. She dared not even cry or allow herself to miss him.
For four years, Xueying was always by her side. When Yi Xiao was drunk, Xueying would brew strong tea to sober her up. When Yi Xiao cried, Xueying would wipe away her tears… Ling Xueying, a young lady spoiled beyond reason by her parents, was the only one who stayed by her side, comforting her throughout these four years.
While browsing a bookstore with Xueying, Yi Xiao once asked her, “We’re not related by blood or marriage. Why are you so kind to me?” Xueying responded by playfully hitting her on the head with the book she was looking at. “If you died, where would I find an excuse to go out and play all day?” As soon as the words left her mouth, Xueying ran off laughing…
Let the days pass like this, until the string snaps, until the heartbreaks, until the day when the weight of longing becomes too much to bear…
To be happy, one must learn to let go.
Xueying departed the next day, repeatedly instructing Yi Xiao to wait for her return before going to Lu City. Yi Xiao readily agreed.
Xueying, I’m not just placating you. If I’m not mistaken, they’ve probably turned all of Pingling upside down these past few days. They’ll find this place soon. Very soon.
The sound of hoofbeats approached, soon nearing Pingling’s city gates. In the distance, there was a clamor of voices. Xueying lifted her veil to look ahead.
The usually clear city gates were now congested with a large crowd. The guards were unhurriedly shouting orders, directing vehicles and pedestrians into two lines, checking each one before allowing them to leave the city.
“What’s going on?” Xueying’s maid, Xiumu, frowned impatiently. “Of all days for an inspection, it had to be when the young miss is leaving.”
The carriage driver answered as he guided the carriage towards the long line of vehicles, “It’s been like this for days. The guards are comparing people’s faces to two portrait scrolls every day. Who knows if some wealthy household lost something or if a servant ran away? But don’t worry, young miss, it won’t take long.”
Xueying’s gaze fell on the mixed crowd at the city gate. It seemed… Suddenly, she lowered the carriage curtain and ordered, “Turn back. I’m not leaving the city. I’ll still pay you the full fare!”
The driver was surprised but readily agreed, turning the horses around. Xiumu looked at Xueying in confusion, “Young miss…”
Xueying frowned and made a gesture of silence. “Don’t panic. We’ll talk when we get back.”