Of all the words exchanged during their long acquaintance, which phrase did she remember most clearly?

Oh, right.

“Let’s break up.”

He said, “Wen Heng, let’s break up!”

She said, “Okay.”

Then, not even two years later, she couldn’t even remember those words anymore.

So, the person who spoke those words might as well have never existed.

When Ah Heng walked out of the movie theater, she saw Xin and Chen, who had been looking for her.

Da Yi asked, “Where did you go? How did you disappear so suddenly? We’ve been searching everywhere.”

Ah Heng chuckled, “I stepped on someone’s foot earlier, and they wouldn’t let me leave. Then, when they turned on the lights in the theater, I was the only one in the entire hall. Spooky.”

Da Yi felt uneasy: “I’ve heard the whole theater is haunted. Maybe it’s true.”

Chen Juan snorted: “What ghost wouldn’t run away at the sight of you?”

Da Yi cursed “Damn!” and kicked him, the two of them roughhousing.

Along the way, Ah Heng walked behind them, silent.

When they reached the compound, Ah Heng said, “I’m leaving tomorrow. Take care of yourselves, and stop fooling around.”

She paused, then smiled: “It’s not easy for two people to be together, so why all the fuss?”

Chen Juan wanted to joke that fighting shows closeness and scolding shows love, but since Wen Yan, the originator of that saying, had split up, those words now felt like a curse.

He glanced at Ah Heng, hesitating: “Heng, have you found someone?”

Ah Heng sniffled, the May night still carrying a hint of chill. She said: “Yes. The problem is everyone loves Wen Heng, making it hard to choose.”

Da Yi kicked at the stones under his feet, hands in his pockets: “You’re not getting any younger, don’t be too picky. If you find someone decent, give it a try. You know… looks aren’t everything, as long as they’re good-hearted and truly care about you…”

Having seen that type of person before, surely nine out of ten in the world must be ugly.

Chen Juan looked at Ah Heng’s neck, where a red string hung with its pendant hidden in her clothes, and asked softly: “That… purple plum seal, why aren’t you wearing it? Don’t you like it?”

Ah Heng was startled: “How did you know?”

Chen Juan: “How wouldn’t I know when I bid for it myself?”

Ah Heng: “Ah? Was it at the charity gala Si Wan asked you to attend?”

Chen Juan also went “Ah?” then, “Uh, mm, yes, Si Wan.”

She said: “Well, three million is too precious. Wearing it out would just invite robbery.”

Chen Juan laughed awkwardly: “True, it was just a birthday gift anyway.”

The compound was home to the older generation. Most children had grown up and moved out, making it quiet after eight, with few people around except for the streetlights.

Passing by a house, Ah Heng said: “You can head back now, no need to walk me further.”

A banyan tree rustled, and moss had grown thicker on the stone chessboard.

Da Yi said: “Let’s walk a bit further, we haven’t reached your home yet, and you being a girl alone at night—”

She said: “Please.”

Chen Juan fell silent and pulled Da Yi back.

Ah Heng approached the white building, looking up at its lifeless facade. In the moonlight, there were only shadows and thick curtains covering the windows.

She pulled open the white fence, bent down, and reached out. The soil in the flower bed was hard and probably hadn’t been loosened in a long time. The seeds she had planted had broken through the earth, growing into lonely, frail stalks. The old gardener had probably forgotten about them too.

The surrounding weeds had grown surprisingly lush in spring, requiring considerable effort to remove. The stalks had grown a layer of fuzzy thorns; when accidentally touched, they pricked her hand, causing unexpected pain.

She crouched down with a small trowel to loosen the soil, but her thoughts drifted far away.

“Wen Heng, I don’t like you. Never have.”

That person’s expression was so serious.

More serious than she was treating this soil.

That was all.

That day, before the New Year had passed, he stood before her, with a sketch on white paper behind him.

The evidence he had agonized over for half a year since summer vacation, he titled it: “The Shape of Happiness.”

Then, his shape of happiness turned out to be the silhouette of a man named Lu Liu.

So…

So, what was Ah Heng?

He said, you’ve seen it all, Wen Heng, let’s break up. I don’t like you.

Yes, never had.

Ah Heng stood up, feeling dizzy from crouching too long. She put the small trowel back in its place and picked up the plastic hose, carefully watering the tall stalks and the faintly emerging flower crowns.

Tending to the flower bed was a troublesome task, and by the time she finished, dawn was breaking. She turned around to find Si Wan standing behind her, holding an unlit flashlight, apparently having come specifically to take her home.

He had given her complete autonomy with time.

“Want to cry?” he opened the fence and walked to her side, looking at the soil on her hands as he spoke softly.

Ah Heng shook her head: “Has Mom made breakfast? I’m hungry, and I have to catch a train today.”

Si Wan looked at her quietly for a very long time before pulling her into his arms: “Go ahead and cry, it’ll hurt if you don’t.”

But Ah Heng wiped all the soil from her hands onto Si Wan’s white shirt, then pushed him away, laughing. She said: “Si Er said she’s been washing all your clothes lately and she’ll kill you if you get them dirty, haha.”

Si Wan: “That’s exactly why I don’t dote on you. What a child, throw you to the wolves and you’d still grow up drinking wolf’s milk, your life force is too strong.”

Ah Heng looked skyward: “You, Wen Si Wan, I’ll tell you, I’ve seen right through you, stop making excuses, really, you… ah!”

Si Wan blushed slightly, extending his clean, slender fingers: “Are you coming or not? Planting a couple of weeds in someone’s yard, still hoping they’ll appear to thank their ex-girlfriend?”

Ah Heng: “Why do I feel like every one of you loves to poke at my wounds without feeling wrong about it?”

Si Wan sneered: “If you’re heartbroken, show a heartbroken expression first.”

Ah Heng was speechless.

Mr. Wen, who told you heartbreak must show on one’s face?

Even if Miss Wen calmly eats buns and drinks soy milk with a blank expression, then suddenly clutches her chest in pain, that’s still heartbreak.

Really.

In June, news spread about an exchange program between Z University Medical School and a famous French medical research institute. The details were both real and illusory, with several versions circulating, but the key point was the number of spots: five.

Given China’s current love for “sea turtles,” spending three years abroad for a golden reputation wasn’t a bad deal. Students from all years, even working alumni, came back to inquire about it. Finally, tired of the questions, the department only said it was true, but selection wouldn’t be based solely on grades. French language skills were mandatory, and candidates would need to pass the research institute’s exam to qualify.

Everyone rushed to learn French. Ah Heng joined the trend, buying a French beginner’s book. After a few days of study, goosebumps kept rising. The torture of English CET-4 and CET-6 had barely ended, and here she was looking for more suffering.

Ah Heng tossed the book aside and went to do experiments in the lab, where she happened to meet Professor Li. After exchanging a few words, Professor Li asked: “Wen Heng, have you thought about studying abroad?”

Ah Heng rubbed her head: “I thought about it a few days ago, but after two days of French, I changed my mind. It’s too difficult, the phonetics and pronunciation are strange.”

Professor Li smiled: “French is the most mellow language after Chinese. When I was young, I worked and studied in France, my foundation was quite good. If you want to learn, you can come to me.”

Ah Heng was stunned: “Professor, don’t you dislike me?”

Professor Li’s eyes were full of mirth, but he sighed: “Stubborn, stubborn, utterly stubborn. It seems it wasn’t Fei Bai who misjudged back then; he never understood you at all. During SARS, you stayed by my side for nearly half a year. People aren’t made of wood; it’s rare to have such a teacher-student bond. What harm is there in helping you?”

Ah Heng: “Professor, I haven’t decided whether to go abroad yet.”

Professor Li nodded: “Come find me when you’ve decided.”

When she told this story at home, Wu made a swipe at Ah Heng’s head: “Are you stupid? Such a good opportunity and you’re still being proud!”

Ah Heng mumbled: “Going abroad… three years… I won’t know anyone.”

Wu said: “What’s wrong with three years? Not knowing anyone is exactly what’s good. Staying in that old compound of yours all day, thinking about all sorts of messy things, aren’t you suffering? Anyway, your mom and grandfather have Wen Si Wan and Wen Si Er to look after them, and the Yun family has Yun Zai, what else are you worried about?”

Big Sister Wu Ying frowned: “Enough, Wu, stop talking. Let Ah Heng think for herself. This matter, you can’t decide for her.”

So Ah Heng kept thinking, thinking and thinking, thinking until summer vacation came and she still hadn’t figured it out. In any case, the thought of going abroad made her anxious and uncomfortable.

Yun Zai remained carefree, smiling, still taking every chance to curl up in Ah Heng’s lap for a nap.

She sighed: “Young Master Yun if I go abroad, where will you plan to lie down?”

Yun Zai rested his elbow on Ah Heng’s leg, his smile like clouds, but remained silent. His black pupils gazed at her, gentle and clear. After a long while, he finally spoke softly: “Wen Heng, if I said I’d go to France with you, what would you think?”

During summer vacation, Ah Heng watched French movies at home all summer.

Si Er kept shaking her head: “You’ve rewound this part eight hundred times, don’t tell me you’re planning to learn French and go to France?”

Ah Heng held the remote control: “I might just really go.”

Si Er: “Oh, before you go, could you open your room curtains first? Watching movies isn’t playing at being autistic, what are you doing?” With that, she pulled open the curtains.

Ah Heng covered her face, saying: “It’s blinding, hey hey, close them.”

But Si Er pulled her: “Come on, let’s go shopping. Why have you been so listless this summer, like you’re heartbroken? Even when you broke up with that person, you weren’t like this?”

Ah Heng smiled helplessly: “Slow down, I haven’t changed out of my pajamas.”

The mall had changed to summer season posters.

The old posters, if disposed of civilly, went into trash bins; if not, they were thrown on the ground, stepped on, trampled, walked past, gone past. No matter how much one liked or favored them before, they were now invisible to the eye.

Si Er was trying cosmetic samples on the first floor of the mall, while Ah Heng stood outside waiting, bored. Recalling a long French sentence she had just learned from the movie, she mulled it over quietly.

At four in the afternoon, the sky suddenly darkened. In August, the rain was unpredictable; thunder rumbled, and soon it was pouring.

She ran into the mall. Si Er still had a face mask on and was too busy to talk to her, so Ah Heng crouched there watching the rain.

Not far from her in the rain lay just such a poster, quietly on the ground.

The mud-stained colored picture, once clean features, upturned eyebrows, soft lips, bright eyes, and black tailcoat.

This was once a cover advertisement that had caused quite a sensation.

Once, because of this poster, the number of members in the poster subject’s fan club had tripled.

Once.

Then, rain-splattered, muddy water soaked, leaving it unrecognizable.

She quietly watched that poster, her eyes clear black and white.

Some young office ladies hurriedly walked through the rain, shielding their hair with bags, their thin heels stepping hard into that poster, viciously trampling the face on it.

She watched quietly.

Some hurrying high school students ran through the rain with big strides, their rough soles completely covering their faces, their pride crumbling inch by inch.

The rain fell harder.

One, two, three, four… she extended her fingers, counting each passerby, coming and going, so many feet, gradually becoming uncountable.

Si Er finished her face mask and hurriedly came looking for Ah Heng, only to see her running into the rain.

“Ah Heng, where are you going?” she asked.

But she seemed not to hear, walking to the middle of the road, bending down to pick up that poster so dirty its original appearance was unrecognizable, pressing it to her cheek, red-eyed, in the heavy rain, like a lost child, facing the distance, crying out loud.

She said, if you could go back to 1998, Wen Heng, you must not fall in love at first sight with a shadow in a window.

Even if you do fall in love at first sight, please be sure to forget his name is Yan Xi.

What can be done? Since the name Yan Xi is already engraved in memory, then please continue to remember, but don’t go to Wu Shui with him.

Deceived by a thousand illusions, going to Wu Shui with him, among countless possibilities, just don’t fall in love with him.

The worst plan would be falling in love with him, but the best strategy would be not staying by his side.

Staying by his side was already a big mistake, but among a thousand mistakes, just don’t forget to carefully guard your heart.

His kindness to you is just repaying a debt, you know?

His kindness to you is all because you were once abandoned, you know?

When he calls you daughter, don’t think you’re special to him.

When he calls you baby, don’t self-hypnotize that he loves you so much.

Even if everything happens, when he says let’s be together, you must say, thank you, I don’t love you.

Because when breaking up, he will tell you, Wen Heng, I don’t like you, never have.