The wind howled through the valley.

Tanmoluojia stood motionless.

Yaoying tugged at his sleeve, coughed a few times, and a faint smile appeared on her face.

“Before, I respected and trusted Master, and the same was true when Master was the Regent. I never thought of anything else.”

Whether he was Tanmoluojia or Sudan Gu, he had always been calm and steady, never showing excess emotion, much less displaying a man’s desires.

Even when she accidentally saw him unclothed, he remained composed, showing no other emotions, as cold as jade.

Yaoying thought Tanmoluojia saw her as a child who hadn’t grown up.

Moreover, with her worries about Li Zhongqian’s safety and the situation in the Western Regions, she had no time to think about such matters.

“Later, when Master was ill, Bisuo repeatedly asked me to keep Master company. Although I had doubts then, I didn’t think much of it, assuming it was because I understood Master’s condition and would keep his secrets, that’s why Bisuo sought me out. It wasn’t until last time that I began to suspect…”

Yaoying looked at Tanmoluojia’s profile.

“That night, while I was sleeping, Master covered me with a blanket, wanting to… touch me…”

At that time, he gazed at her for so long that she wondered if he wanted to do something.

Hearing her mention that night’s events, Tanmoluojia remained silent, his robes fluttering in the wind.

Yaoying declared firmly: “I know that wasn’t my dream.”

…

Tanmoluojia was a monk; he couldn’t possibly want to touch her merely out of sympathy or pity.

That night, Yaoying’s suspicions were confirmed, like five thunderbolts striking her head. Her heart pounded wildly, and she stared in disbelief, unable to accept it.

She was grateful Tanmoluojia was ill then, or he would surely have heard her heart beating like a drum.

In her eyes, Tanmoluojia had comprehended all things; because he saw through everything, he wouldn’t care about anything. Sometimes he was so calm and rational that it bordered on indifference. How could someone like him develop feelings for a woman?

Did he like her? And wanted to keep her?

Yaoying couldn’t sleep that night, her mind in chaos, thoughts surging, indescribable.

Many things that had seemed strange before now had reasonable explanations: him taking her to pray at the pagoda, asking the Indian doctor to check her pulse without telling her, the embrace in the rain, Bisuo saying his mood was deeply depressed, him often silently gazing at her, telling her in dreams that he wanted her to stay with him…

Memories flooded back. Yaoying turned over, looking at Tanmoluojia lying on his side on the couch, her heart feeling sour and heavy as a thousand weights.

Shock, astonishment, bewilderment, contradiction, confusion, bitterness…

But there was no anger at being deceived.

Nor fear of sharing a room with him.

If any other man had tried to touch her while she slept in the middle of the night, she would have rolled up her bedding and found an excuse to leave.

But with Tanmoluojia, she wasn’t afraid at all.

Yaoying felt very sad.

Not for herself, but for Tanmoluojia.

He was a monk, and in the book, he held firm to his faith until death. Having developed feelings for her and keeping her by his side must have caused him great torment.

And she knew nothing, likely hurting him unintentionally.

Every time she got close to him was a test for him.

And she had so happily talked about returning home with him so many times…

Yaoying gazed at him, thinking about many things for a long time until her thoughts gradually became clear.

…

The sun had risen to the top of the cliff, and gusts of cool wind swept through, creating strange howling echoes in the valley.

Yaoying raised her head.

“Master, that morning when Bisuo entered the room, I was awake, and I made a decision. Do you know what my decision was?”

Tanmoluojia let her grip his sleeve without responding.

Yaoying said: “I understood Master’s feelings, and thinking back carefully, I understood many things, so I decided to seek confirmation from you formally.”

If he denied it, she would leave.

“Master is a practitioner, I understand how firm Master’s beliefs are, and I know the responsibilities Master bears as a Buddhist son. Since Master never showed any affection before me and denied it several times after my probing, it shows Master’s will is firm, and male-female feelings were just a momentary impulse. Master’s Buddhist understanding is profound, surely you can see through this and won’t be troubled by male-female feelings.”

“Before, I didn’t know Master’s feelings and inadvertently caused you trouble. Later, when I knew Master’s feelings, how could I continue staying in the Holy City, disturbing Master further?”

“Since Master had made your choice, I won’t force you to admit you developed feelings for me, doing so would only make us both unhappy, adding unnecessary troubles.”

“I want to bid Master farewell pleasantly.”

This way, when they remembered each other in the future, they would only remember the good things.

At that time, Yaoying thought: Although Tanmoluojia had feelings for her, he didn’t intend to tell her, so why should she probe deeper?

If he had no intention, she would not persist.

So, she left.

Yaoying faced the brilliant sunlight pouring down, saying softly: “Master, do you know, when I left the Holy City last time, I resolved—in this life, I would never see you again.”

She spoke with a hint of a smile, making light of it.

Tanmoluojia closed his eyes briefly.

“I won’t write to you personally, won’t come to the Holy City again.”

“In this life, there will be no more connection between us.”

“Neither in life nor death shall we meet again.”

Yaoying spoke word by word, her tone calm.

Tanmoluojia remained silent, the wind on his face ice-cold.

Yaoying smiled slightly: “Master, I thought then that I could do as I said, never turn back to disturb you.”

That was her plan, and that’s what she did.

After leaving the royal court, she stopped writing to him, stopped asking about him, and even when she met his guard Yuanjue in Gaochang, she didn’t mention him at all, only discussing military intelligence from the royal court.

Parting like this, she was grateful to him, he silently cared for her, and they would be separated forever, each living their joy.

Thousands of miles apart, an unbridgeable chasm between them.

Yaoying let out a long breath, her gaze returning to Tanmoluojia’s face.

He had just torn off his mask, traces still visible on his face, his features deep-set and pale as drawn in ink, brows like gathered mountains, eyes like colored glass.

“Is this the result Master wanted to see?”

Tanmoluojia remained silent.

Yes, this was the best outcome for them.

“You wanted to break off completely with me, even if you accidentally revealed your feelings to me today, letting me know your thoughts, you still wouldn’t change your will. You’d rather expose your identity, directly tell me you are Sudan Gu, than let me harbor any thoughts about you… even with a disguised identity, you wouldn’t allow yourself the slightest relaxation.”

Tanmoluojia remained motionless.

He dared not relax; she liked Sudan Gu, he had to tell her the truth because he knew that as Sudan Gu, he would gradually indulge himself, and that wouldn’t be fair to her.

Knowing what he wanted made it more important to cut off that possibility.

“You’re clear-headed and rational, thinking everything through…”

Yaoying spoke, a trace of a smile passing over her face, sighing deeply, both happy and sad.

“Luojia, then why did you come to Gaochang?”

With this question, silence fell around them.

Tanmoluojia remained silent, scattered light dancing in his eyes.

Yaoying looked at him: “Master is a high monk, should have more resolve than me, more willpower, since Master can control yourself, why did you personally come to Gaochang to save my brother?”

“Luojia, you can’t let go of me, even after I left the Holy City, you still can’t let go, isn’t that right?”

“You’re gravely ill, having me by your side makes you feel better, doesn’t it?”

“Luojia, monks don’t tell lies.”

Yaoying spoke sentence by sentence, her voice hoarse, meeting his gaze.

“Luojia, stop deceiving me.”

“Do you know I worry about your health? Do you know how much it hurt when I discovered Abi was you, that you rode thousands of miles, then left alone while injured? Do you know that when I resolved to forget you, not disturb your practice, yet you repeatedly came to care for me, I also felt pain? You have many concerns and thoughts, but you keep them all to yourself, telling me nothing, I only thought I was an obstacle in your path of practice, causing you trouble, resolved to stay away from you, yet you come to provoke me again.”

“When I like someone, regardless of their identity, I will like them properly, if they don’t need my affection, then I’ll leave.”

Her expression turned cold.

“What about you?”

“You say you like me, it’s not my business, tell me not to mind… fine, I won’t mind, I’ll stay away from you, never see you again… can you let go?”

“Next time, will you still hide from me, quietly come to my side, then quietly leave?”

Tanmoluojia lowered his gaze to look at Yaoying, his fingers making a motion of touching prayer beads, a faint bitter smile flashing across his face.

So she knew everything.

Last time’s farewell was indeed final.

“Princess, I am a monk.”

“I know Master is a monk, and I know Master’s choice, I respect you.”

Yaoying looked directly at Tanmoluojia, changing her tone, “Then please, Master, don’t interfere with my choice.”

The wind quieted down, and several gray birds flapped their wings and flew over their heads.

Tanmoluojia’s gaze rested on her face: “What is the Princess’s choice?”

Yaoying turned sideways, facing the brilliant light pouring down, looking at the scattered rocks in the distance, her face bright and clear.

“You’re gravely ill now, I am your heart demon, and I want to help you overcome this heart demon.”

“Whatever happens, this is my choice. When you figure things out, I will leave, won’t cling to you.”

“I understand, you’re the royal court’s Buddhist son, not only is your faith firm, but you’re also the Buddhist son in countless believers’ hearts, you can never return to secular life in this lifetime.”

“If you won’t return to secular life, then don’t.”

Yaoying smiled faintly, coughed several times, and waved her hand, her face completely calm and unperturbed.

“I don’t care that you’re a monk.”

“Luojia, I won’t force you to abandon your responsibilities and faith, I just want to care for you properly. In the future, don’t hide from me anymore.”

She had never cared about her so-called reputation.

The mountain wind swept by, her disheveled hair by her temples blown messy by the wind, her eyes bright and spirited, she said: “I am an obstacle in your path of practice, let me accompany you through this challenge.”

Tanmoluojia stood motionless, wind-moving clouds, a beam of light happened to fall on his handsome face, revealing his clear features, scattered light rippling in his eyes.

She was willing to help him overcome his heart demon, but what about herself?

He stared at her for a moment, then turned and walked away, his sleeves fluttering.

Yaoying’s lips curved slightly, she followed him, walking a few steps, feeling dizzy, stumbling through the scattered rocks.

The figure walking ahead stopped, hesitated, then raised his arm while facing away from her.

Yaoying’s mouth opened slightly, her heart turning sour, as she gently took his arm.

He couldn’t bear to see her stumble, yet had to repeatedly send her away.

She leaned against him, her heart settling, fatigue gradually washing over her, coughing lightly.

…

The fire had long gone out.

Tanmoluojia lifted the earthen pot, the water inside was still hot.

He poured a bowl of water and brought it to Yaoying’s lips.

Yaoying had talked too much, her throat burning like fire, each cough sounding heart-wrenching, she drank several sips from his hand.

Soon, Tanmoluojia felt the pressure on his sleeve loosen.

Yaoying let go, closed her eyes, and fell asleep exhausted, her face haggard.

She had just used all her strength to tell him everything she wanted to say, giving him no chance to escape.

Now that strength was gone, her whole body ached, and she felt dizzy and heavy.

Tanmoluojia picked up the felt blanket, and covered Yaoying again, his brows slightly furrowed.

The bruises on her face and neck were more obvious now.

He watched her for a while, then tucked in the felt blanket.

Yaoying gradually warmed up, unconsciously snuggling closer into his embrace, her breath passing through his clothes, falling on his chest.

Tanmoluojia’s figure stiffened slightly, he closed his eyes, letting her nestle against him so she could sleep more comfortably.

In the quiet mountain hollow, suddenly footsteps sounded.

Tanmoluojia put on his headscarf and mask.

Bisuo led three horses over, looking around cautiously, stepped forward, and said in a low voice: “Regent, Princess Wenzhao’s guards have come looking, the princess hasn’t returned all night… they’re worried something happened to her, they went to the main camp asking where the princess went, I made up an excuse to put them off. The army is about to move… You should set out too.”

Tanmoluojia picked up Yaoying, “I’ll take the princess back to Gaochang.”

Bisuo frowned, raising his voice involuntarily: “Your condition… you must return to the Holy City quickly to disperse your power…”

Every time he completely dispersed his power, he couldn’t walk for several days, these days he had been relying on medicine to suppress it.

“Once I get her to Gaochang, I’ll hurry back immediately.”

Tanmoluojia said flatly, wrapping Yaoying tightly, and helping her onto horseback.

The movement woke Yaoying, the felt blanket stirred, an arm extended out, then her tired face emerged from the blanket, her blurry gaze gradually clearing, brows furrowed, her eyes methodically scanning around before landing on Tanmoluojia.

Tanmoluojia stood by the black horse, silent.

Yaoying’s eyes narrowed slightly as if thinking about something.

“Regent, what do you think of my proposal?”

Tanmoluojia didn’t answer.

Bisuo keenly sensed the strange atmosphere flowing between the two, keeping his eyes down, motionless.

The cool wind blew, Yaoying coughed once, looking at Tanmoluojia, and asked: “Where did you just say you’re taking me?”

Bisuo dared not make a sound.

Tanmoluojia helped Yaoying sit steadily, saying flatly: “Taking you back to Gaochang.”

Yaoying smiled, she knew he would answer like this.

She said in a hoarse voice: “No need for the Regent to take me back, I’m not returning to Gaochang, the Wei Dynasty has recovered lost territory, I must go to the Holy City to pay respects to the Buddhist son, present the state letter and gifts of gratitude. This is an important diplomatic matter, it cannot be treated lightly.”

Bisuo’s face twitched slightly.

He hadn’t noticed before, but Princess Wenzhao’s way of saying “Regent” rolled off her tongue more naturally than his and Yuanjue’s.

Tanmoluojia raised his eyelids.

“Aren’t we going the same way?” Yaoying wrapped the felt blanket tightly, taking up the reins, “Since we happened to meet you, now that bandits are rampant, I only brought a few dozen personal guards, it’s safer to follow behind the army. I’m very tired now, my whole body aches, I want to get back to the carriage in camp and have a good sleep, let’s go quickly.”

As she spoke, she didn’t look at Tanmoluojia at all, looking toward Bisuo instead, her eyes urging him.

“Let’s go.”

Her voice revealed deep fatigue.

Bisuo didn’t know what to say, looking toward Tanmoluojia.

Tanmoluojia gazed into the distance, his peripheral vision noting that the bruise on Yaoying’s forehead was becoming more obvious.

He had deliberately avoided the main road, the valley rarely saw travelers, she didn’t know martial arts, braving the rain to find her way here, surely her scrapes were far more than the few he could see.

She kept coughing, if it dragged on it would harm her health, now she needed rest and medicine.

He mounted his horse, taking up the reins.

Beside him, Bisuo secretly breathed a sigh of relief.

It was better to return to the Holy City.

With the princess here, Luojia wouldn’t have to hide from people and sleep rough on this journey.

They returned to the main camp, and sure enough, Yaoying’s guards had come looking, seeing Tanmoluojia with his concealed identity and covered face, they didn’t ask a single question, just brought over a large carriage.

Bisuo counted the troops, leading the army to continue their journey, Yaoying’s guards surrounding the carriage following at a distance behind.

Yaoying read several military intelligence letters, wrote a reply, and then fell into deep sleep, when she woke again, she was lying in the swaying carriage, covered with a soft brocade blanket.

She sat up, rubbing her sore shoulders, lifted the carriage curtain, about to call someone, then froze.

A familiar figure rode ahead of the carriage, wearing a tight-sleeved white robe wrapped closely around him, his silhouette solitary.

Fortunately, this time he hadn’t quietly run away.

A cool breeze blew in her face, Yaoying leaned against the carriage window coughing, the man in the distance heard the sound, and turned back, his gaze falling on her face.

Through the wind and sand, their eyes met, his face covered with a windproof mask, his expression unclear.

Yaoying coughed until her face was red, waving to him.

“Come here.”

Her voice was hoarse.

Tanmoluojia watched her for a while, then turned his horse around.

When he came close, Yaoying lifted the carriage curtain, “Come up, I have something to tell you.”

Her eyes signaled to her other personal guards.

The guards immediately rode forward, eyes bright, waiting to take Tanmoluojia’s horse.

Yaoying held up the curtain with one hand, still coughing, her shoulders trembling slightly.

Tanmoluojia swung his long legs, dismounting and climbing into the carriage.

The curtain fell, and Yaoying sat wrapped in the brocade blanket against the carriage wall, the small space filled with a faint sweet fragrance, Tanmoluojia bent down, sitting in the farthest corner from her.

“Your injuries haven’t healed, and you can’t always be exposed to the elements, stop riding, keep me company in the carriage.”

Yaoying said.

Tanmoluojia remained silent.

Yaoying didn’t need his answer, hugging the brocade blanket as she lay down again, worried about missing him, she had traveled day and night for several days, and last night had climbed the mountain path for so long before finding him, her whole body ached, now she just wanted to rest properly.

She lay among the soft wool blankets, glancing up at Tanmoluojia.

He sat formally, not looking at her.

Yaoying sighed inwardly, releasing the brocade blanket, crawling on hands and feet to his front, meeting his gaze.

Tanmoluojia didn’t move a muscle.

Yaoying raised her hand, removing the mask from his face: “Don’t wear this in the carriage, it’s stifling. Don’t worry, without my order, my guards won’t lift the curtain to come in, they won’t discover your identity.”

Tanmoluojia lowered his gaze to look at Yaoying, his eyes lingering long on her forehead.

“What is it?”

Yaoying felt his gaze was somewhat strange, and asked.

Tanmoluojia said softly: “Need to apply more medicine.”

Yaoying sat up bewildered, grabbing a small mother-of-pearl copper mirror to look at her face, letting out a soft “ah.”

Last night she stumbled and bumped along the way, falling several times, her cheek was slightly scraped, and the bump on her forehead had grown more swollen.

Yaoying’s mouth twitched.

No wonder Bisuo’s looks at her were strange.

She shook her head and laughed, this morning she had spoken so seriously to Tanmoluojia with a bump like an immortal’s on her head, she must have looked quite ridiculous.

It was good of him not to laugh.

Yaoying looked up at Tanmoluojia.

“Look—”

She pointed at the bump on her forehead.

“This is because after you rode thousands of miles but left without saying goodbye, I worried about you and came looking all the way, that’s why I ended up like this. If you had told me the truth, I wouldn’t have suffered these hardships.”

Tanmoluojia was speechless.

Yaoying stuffed the small copper mirror into his hand: “Hold this for me.”

She lowered her head, found the medicinal ointment, opened the shell container, sat cross-legged in front of Tanmoluojia, picked up a bit of ointment, lifted her face, applying medicine while looking in the copper mirror.

The red swollen area stung fiercely, she let out a soft hiss.

Tanmoluojia held the copper mirror, expressionless.

The bump on Yaoying’s forehead didn’t go down for several days.

Every morning she would look in the mirror, checking if the bruising had improved at all, and when she needed to leave the carriage she would wear a veil, covering her entire face.

During this time, she required Tanmoluojia to stay in the carriage to recover from his injuries, if he showed signs of wanting to leave alone, she would lift her veil to show him the bump on her head.

“You were injured saving my brother, I must take good care of you, if you leave without telling me, I’ll go looking for you again until you’re fully recovered.”

Tanmoluojia said: “It’s just ordinary flesh wounds.”

Yaoying smiled: “I only have some scrapes and a slight cough, you tell me to apply medicine and take medicine, why is it different when it comes to you?”

Tanmoluojia shifted his gaze, looking at the swaying curtain, his expression calm.

“I am different from the Princess.”

He said after a moment of silence.

Yaoying shook her head: “We’re the same, we’re both mortal flesh, injuries hurt us, and illness makes us suffer.”

Tanmoluojia thought of her getting injured falling in the valley that rainy night and said nothing.

After a few days, they reached the border city, the army returning victorious, the defending general led all the city’s soldiers and civilians out to welcome them, flowers scattered, wine intoxicating.

Bisuo dealt with a grand banquet, then learned that the Wei Dynasty envoys were in the city’s guesthouse, preparing to go to the Holy City to present gifts of gratitude, greatly surprised—the princess hadn’t lied, Wei had indeed sent envoys, though the chief envoy wasn’t Princess Wenzhao.

The chief envoy heard that Yaoying’s group had entered the city with the army, and immediately went to their lodgings at the guesthouse, pushing open the door.

Lamps were lit inside, account books covered the table, and Yaoying was bent over writing, hearing her guard’s report, she smiled and stood up.

“Brother, I was just about to send someone to the guesthouse to ask if you had arrived.”

The delegation’s chief envoy was Li Zhongqian, Yaoying had arranged to come to the Holy City together with him, he had set out early, thinking she was still behind, not expecting her to catch up so quickly.

“I arrived this morning.”

Li Zhongqian said, his phoenix eyes casually scanning around, catching sight of a figure in the inner room, his brows furrowing tightly, his gaze like lightning.

A tall figure sat cross-legged on the felt mat in the inner room, as if meditating and regulating his breath, no lamp was lit in the inner room, separated by gauze curtains, the person’s face covered with a face cloth, his features unclear.

Li Zhongqian’s eyes showed alertness.

So late at night, why was this man still in Mingyue Nu’s room?