Perhaps it was mostly psychological, but Lin Yiran slept soundly through the night while being held in Qiu Xing’s arms, enclosed in a small space. In her dreams, Qiu Xing was everywhere.

Sometimes she dreamed they were still on the truck, with Qiu Xing stepping on the footboard with one foot, taking things down from the vehicle. Other times it was the present-day Qiu Xing, wearing a down vest in winter, the hood of his sweatshirt pulled up, hands in his pockets as he walked with Lin Yiran back to his mother’s place.

Even when Qiu Xing fell into deep sleep during the night, he didn’t let go of her, his hand resting lightly yet firmly on her stomach.

In the morning, Lin Yiran woke up first while Qiu Xing was still asleep. Her hair was spread across his body, but he didn’t seem to mind the tickling sensation, continuing to sleep soundly.

Lin Yiran turned over to face Qiu Xing. She gathered her hair, bundling it into a single strand and placing it behind her. Qiu Xing, sensing her movement, unconsciously tightened his arms around her.

Lin Yiran gazed at his sleeping face. Qiu Xing indeed had handsome features—attractive and well-defined, with a high, straight nose that had a slight bridge, lips that were neither thin nor thick, and a slightly more pronounced lower lip line. When he slept like this, his expression completely relaxed, and his lower lip formed a plump curve.

Sometimes Lin Yiran thought Qiu Xing looked like a child when he slept, pure and innocent.

She reached out her hand and traced the shape of his lower lip.

Qiu Xing opened his eyes, looking at her calmly, then raised his hand, grabbed Lin Yiran’s hand, and tucked it back under the blanket before closing his eyes and continuing to sleep.

Qiu Xing had changed quite a bit, though not obviously so, but Lin Yiran could feel it. For instance, he no longer frowned when woken up from sleep. In the past, he had severe morning grumpiness and would be sulky if he didn’t sleep well. Now he wasn’t as sleep-deprived as before, and even if woken up from a good sleep, he remained calm.

Another example was that Qiu Xing wasn’t as numb as before.

Previously, his face had been expressionless, his eyes without light, shutting himself off from his surroundings. Now, though still not exactly cheerful and nothing like when he was a child, he smiled more often, and his eyes were no longer always empty.

Lin Yiran gazed quietly at Qiu Xing, thinking to herself, You should smile more often.

Before fully waking up, Qiu Xing lowered his head and nuzzled against Lin Yiran’s neck and collarbone for a while. Lin Yiran stroked his head, her eyes curving into a smile.

Qiu Xing needed to leave in the morning as he had scheduled a business meeting today. Lin Yiran also had to return to school to continue studying. Last night had been a stolen moment of leisure amidst her busy schedule. Having woken up feeling better than yesterday, she couldn’t afford to rest any longer.

Before Qiu Xing left, they went to eat first. Lin Yiran ordered a bowl of pumpkin porridge and sipped it slowly.

“When do you have a break?” Qiu Xing asked.

Lin Yiran shook her head and said, “Not sure, the time for one exam hasn’t been announced yet.”

“What are your plans for the break?” Qiu Xing tapped an egg and rolled it on the table, peeling off the shell.

Lin Yiran was about to say she hadn’t planned yet, but changed her mind at the last moment: “I’ll come see you.”

“What for?” Qiu Xing placed the peeled egg in Lin Yiran’s bowl. “I’ll be busy.”

“You do your thing, I’ll do mine. You don’t need to make time for me,” Lin Yiran said with a smile.

“Are you imposing yourself on me?” Qiu Xing asked.

Lin Yiran wasn’t hungry and wasn’t eating properly. One hand stirred the porridge in the bowl while the other propped up her chin. She smiled at Qiu Xing and said, “To date you.”

Qiu Xing lifted his eyelids to glance at her, then ignored her.

Lin Yiran didn’t mind whether he responded or not. She had begun to see through Qiu Xing’s tough exterior.

After Qiu Xing left, he maintained his usual indifferent demeanor, except for a message the next day asking: “Feeling better?”

Lin Yiran said she was already fine, and after that, Qiu Xing didn’t show any more concern, putting on an air of detachment.

If not for the incident of him going out to buy facial cleanser and sleeping pants while she was asleep, others might have believed his act.

Lin Yiran’s last exam was scheduled quite late, causing many students who had already bought tickets home to repeatedly reschedule due to this exam.

Lin Yiran wasn’t in a hurry to buy her ticket. She didn’t plan to visit Qiu Xing immediately after the break; she wanted to wait until everything was over and spend some quiet time at school to calm her mind.

Writing is inevitably a solitary activity. The words produced in solitude differ from those produced in crowds. Words born in crowds have a human warmth, a sense of life’s vibrancy. But Lin Yiran’s words were originally meant to be cold and lonely.

When she was with Qiu Xing, her writing became gentler, more broadly encompassing everything, and even her hatred dissipated.

When Lin Yiran received the nanny’s call, she had just finished dinner and was jogging on the sports field. Many students had already left school, so the field wasn’t crowded. The usual football players couldn’t form two teams, so they just practiced tricks with the ball. Couples strolled around the track, and a few girls were walking their dogs.

Lin Yiran heard the ringtone through her earphones, slowed down to a walk, and answered the call.

“Hello,” she said without checking the screen, not knowing who was calling.

“Yiran? This is Aunt Mei,” the nanny’s voice came through, and Lin Yiran instinctively stopped in her tracks.

“What’s wrong, Auntie?”

The nanny had both Lin Yiran and Qiu Xing’s phone numbers, but she had never called before. This being the first time Lin Yiran received her call, her heart tightened involuntarily.

Yu Mei’s voice was very low, as if covering the mouthpiece: “Yiran, I don’t know what to do. Sister Fang forbade me from calling either of you, but I’m worried.”

Lin Yiran frowned slightly and asked, “What happened?”

“These days, Sister Fang hasn’t been well. She can’t sleep all night, so she got some medication herself, but after taking it, she keeps sleeping. Sometimes she cries, sometimes she talks nonsense. I’ve never seen her like this before. Her mental… her mental state isn’t good, but she doesn’t want me to tell anyone.” The nanny’s voice had a bit of breathlessness, maybe from nervously making the call secretly from the balcony. She continued, “I haven’t dared to leave these past two nights. I’m afraid she won’t be alright by herself.”

“Why is she suddenly like this?” Lin Yiran’s heart sank.

“Oh my, listen to me,” Yu Mei sighed heavily, recounting with lingering fear, “Last week, the two of us went to the market to buy vegetables. She wanted to eat dumplings, so we went to buy chives. There was a new woman at the market whom we hadn’t seen before. She kept staring at Sister Fang, with such a direct, frightening gaze. I felt scared just looking at her. I was pulling Sister Fang to leave when that woman suddenly threw a bag of peas at Sister Fang’s head, shouting ‘Murderer!’ She said so many awful things. I hurried away with Sister Fang!”

Lin Yiran asked with furrowed brows, “Why didn’t you tell us earlier?”

“Sister Fang wouldn’t let me. She told me many, many times not to tell you both,” Yu Mei’s voice carried a hint of choking, “But I’m too scared. I’m afraid her mental state won’t improve.”

“I’ll be back the day after tomorrow. Auntie, please stay with her,” Lin Yiran said. “I’ll handle it when I get back.”

“Alright, alright, but don’t tell Xiao Qiu yet!” Yu Mei said anxiously. “I’m afraid he’ll come back and start a fight! Besides, he shouldn’t come back yet. Whether Sister Fang is clear-headed or confused, I’m afraid seeing him will shock her.”

“Mm, I understand,” Lin Yiran repeated, “I’ll be back the day after tomorrow.”

Lin Yiran had promised not to tell Qiu Xing, but she called him immediately afterward.

She didn’t hide things from Qiu Xing, especially not matters concerning his mother. There was no reason to keep it from him.

But Lin Yiran didn’t mention the “murderer” comments, only saying that Aunt Fang had a conflict with someone while buying vegetables, which had upset her.

“Don’t rush back,” Lin Yiran told him. “Let me go check on her first.”

Qiu Xing skeptically asked, “She argued with someone?”

Lin Yiran pressed her lips together and said, “Aunt Mei didn’t give details.”

Qiu Xing’s mother was always a gentle person, soft-spoken, never getting into disputes. The possibility of her arguing with someone over vegetables was quite small.

“I’ll go back with you,” Qiu Xing said.

Qiu Xing couldn’t return before Lin Yiran. If Aunt Fang was truly in a bad state, seeing Qiu Xing would only upset her more. She couldn’t accept the twenty-something Qiu Xing; this wasn’t her son.

Her son was still in high school, hadn’t gone to university, and certainly wasn’t driving trucks or fixing cars.

“Alright, don’t worry,” Lin Yiran reassured him.

Qiu Xing responded with an “Mm.”

As soon as Lin Yiran returned to her dormitory, the first thing she did was book a ticket. She booked a high-speed rail ticket for the day after tomorrow. Second-class seats were sold out, so she booked a first-class seat. Since starting university, Lin Yiran had never bought a first-class ticket when traveling alone, considering it too expensive. Qiu Xing had booked first-class tickets for her twice, but Lin Yiran had refunded them and switched to second-class seats.

Qiu Xing gave her plenty of money; her mother had left her a lot of money, and she had her own income from writing fees and scholarships. Lin Yiran wasn’t short on funds, but she still didn’t like to spend much. Qiu Xing complained that she lived too frugally, so he often transferred money to her, but that didn’t change Lin Yiran’s spending habits.

This time, however, Lin Yiran booked a first-class ticket without hesitation, not minding the cost at all.

But Lin Yiran wouldn’t be able to take this train, and she wouldn’t even finish her last exam.

The next day at noon, nanny Yu Mei called, crying and shouting on the phone: “Yiran? Your Aunt Fang has gone crazy! What should we do? She keeps shouting, and she’s vomiting! I can’t stop her, what should we do?!”

If Yu Mei wasn’t completely panicked, she wouldn’t have said Aunt Fang had gone crazy on the phone. They normally didn’t use such words, at most saying she was ill.

Lin Yiran’s pen drew an unsteady line on her paper. She tossed the pen aside, stood up, and left the study room, urgently asking, “What happened?”

“That woman was just outside the complex, shouting that the murderer’s family should all go to hell! She called out Qiu Xing’s father’s name, saying he was a soul-collector!” Yu Mei cried out, “You all need to come back quickly! I’m really scared! What should we do?!”

“Is that person still downstairs?” Lin Yiran asked.

“The security guards dragged her away!” Yu Mei said through tears.

Lin Yiran could hear Aunt Fang screaming in the background, and her heart felt like it was being cut by a knife.

“Call the Anning Hospital and have them send an ambulance,” Lin Yiran closed her eyes briefly, and though her voice trembled, she spoke with composure, “Tell them the symptoms are severe during episodes, and they should bring sedatives as there’s no medication at home. Put away all the kitchen knives, scissors, and similar items.”

“I’m scared, Yiran! Will something terrible happen?” Yu Mei asked frantically.

“Don’t be afraid. Call them right now,” Lin Yiran told her, “I’m coming back immediately.”

Lin Yiran hung up, quickly packed her things, and ran back to the dormitory. She swiftly packed her suitcase and took a taxi straight to the high-speed rail station.

In the car, she bought a ticket for the nearest high-speed train, though she could only get a standing ticket. Lin Yiran’s heart remained unsettled; in her ears echoed Aunt Fang’s screams from the phone call, piercing her ears and heart with pain.

Even when Aunt Fang had episodes before, they weren’t like this. She would be stuck in the past, muttering confused words. Although Lin Yiran hadn’t witnessed her initial symptoms, Qiu Xing had said she wasn’t violent or sharp—she just couldn’t accept reality.

Lin Yiran’s heart felt as if it had sunk into the deep sea. She felt a profound sense of helplessness toward the world, yet she had to remain strong.

She still didn’t hide anything from Qiu Xing, although it wasn’t appropriate for him to return now. But that was his mother, and no one had the right to keep it from him. Qiu Xing deserved to know the situation immediately.

Qiu Xing interrupted her, saying, “I’m going home now. You go back to take your exam.”

Lin Yiran said, “She’s very serious this time. You can’t go back alone, I…”

“You come back tomorrow,” Qiu Xing spoke quickly, but didn’t sound particularly panicked, though his voice was deep.

“I’m not taking the exam. I’m about to reach the station,” Lin Yiran said. “I’ve already asked for leave from my teacher. I can take a makeup exam next semester.”

“Lin Yiran,” Qiu Xing’s voice was deep and cold, calling her name in warning.

Lin Yiran became stubborn too, frowning as she repeated, “I’m not taking the exam.”

After saying this, she hung up. Qiu Xing didn’t call back; he was probably calling the nanny.

While waiting at the station, Lin Yiran’s fingertips were still trembling slightly.

Just now, Qiu Xing had sounded so steady on the phone. Even knowing his mother was in a bad state, he remained relatively calm and composed.

Lin Yiran knew he could probably handle all the problems. He was Qiu Xing, who slept in his truck day and night, driving on the road; he was Qiu Xing, who had paid off a debt of 900,000 in less than three years; he was Qiu Xing, who seemed capable of anything.

But Lin Yiran still didn’t hesitate to go back.

She couldn’t abandon Aunt Fang in this state, afraid that Qiu Xing wouldn’t be able to see his mother, afraid that the situation would worsen.

Beyond that, she also wanted to be with Qiu Xing.

The person she wanted to accompany wasn’t the current unflappable Qiu Xing, but perhaps the nineteen-year-old Qiu Xing deep in his heart.