Fortunately, Song Muchuan waited patiently for Nanyi without pressing her urgently for answers.

“I encountered Xie Queshan and he nearly killed me…” Nanyi organized her emotions, omitting some unspeakable details in between, speaking half-truths. “Then I heard him say he was going to annihilate the Yucheng Army, so I wounded him and found a way to escape to bring warning. Master Song, I certainly can’t return to the Xie family, and there’s no place for me in Li Du Mansion either. Even if you sent me to Jinling, with my current abilities, I’d probably find it difficult to establish myself. I truly want to learn some self-defense skills, which is why I said I wanted to stay with the Yucheng Army.”

Through the dim light, Song Muchuan looked at Nanyi. He realized that in just a few days of not seeing her, she had undergone tremendous change. The girl he had sent down from the painted boat was timid and uneasy, like a bundle of anxious wild grass, grasping at something illusory, desperately drifting forward. He had tried hard to send her somewhere safer, yet overlooked that no matter where she went, she was rootless duckweed.

But now, some fear had disappeared from her eyes. He didn’t know if this was good or bad. The good was that she had become fearless; the bad was that whatever had supported her seemed to have collapsed.

He remembered her once asking him if he had anything he wanted to do in the future. When he answered yes, her expression had been happy.

In her heart, a person could only live if they had something they wanted to do.

Had that thing in her heart already been shattered?

He didn’t dare ask further. He feared it was her wound. But he wanted to give her a place to go, a sense of belonging.

“Then Madam, have you considered joining Bingzhu Division?”

By saying this, he was honestly exposing his identity to her.

Nanyi’s eyes widened in surprise: “Me?”

“Yes,” he answered firmly.

“How could I be worthy?” Nanyi blurted out in surprise.

“How is Madam not worthy? Saving Master Xie, discovering the spy in Wangxue Valley, helping Xie Sixth countless times, and today saving the Yucheng Army—these deeds alone are enough to make all the agents in Li Du Mansion pale in comparison. Madam perhaps has never realized you are uncut jade. Once or twice might be luck, but succeeding every time shows that your schemes, wisdom, even instincts and judgment are no worse than anyone’s.”

She felt Song Muchuan was describing someone else, yet wasn’t every detail exactly about her?

Nanyi had never examined herself from that angle. She had always thought she was still that wandering little thief, but from when had she… gradually gained steady footing?

She had made friends she never imagined she could have contact with before. She helped these people, and they reciprocated.

Each escape from death brought new insights and understanding. Each survival in narrow spaces moved her one step further from ignorance, gradually seeing clearly this complex world and human hearts. Unknowingly, she had completed certain transformations.

Xie Queshan—a person whose very name made her shudder—yet traces of him were everywhere in her life’s growth. The storms he brought became nourishing rain that helped her take root and sprout, until the moment she grew a trunk and extended branches, she suddenly discovered she might not be grass after all, but a tree.

Now she could even negotiate terms with the Yucheng Army without kneeling to beg. He wouldn’t let her kneel, so she truly never knelt again, walking upright through this chaotic world.

She hated him, but her emotions were complex. She couldn’t name what it was—clearly she had escaped, yet she always felt his rope still bound some part of her body, making her heart ache like tangled hemp whenever she thought of him.

She was dazed for a while before looking at Song Muchuan.

“I don’t want to join Bingzhu Division either,” she said. “People in Bingzhu Division all view death as returning home, but I haven’t decided—I might not be willing to make such sacrifices.”

Song Muchuan didn’t respond, only looked at her gently. He didn’t evade her confession nor show any displeasure. It was precisely his magnanimous spirit that allowed her to boldly continue.

“Sir, I can only see petty gains before my eyes. I have no noble righteousness.”

“In this world, all beings live differently. If we demanded everyone have noble righteousness, that would be too harsh. If Madam doesn’t want to join Bingzhu Division, would you consider occasionally helping me?”

Nanyi looked confused: “How would I help?”

“Sixth Miss must have told Madam that getting Prince Ling’an out of the city is urgent. The situation in Li Du Mansion is treacherous and changes rapidly—there will always be times when manpower is needed. If Madam can help, once we successfully escort His Highness to the new capital and assist his ascension, I can also seek court rewards for you. Even if it’s just an acre of poor land, it would give you the confidence of having court backing. No matter where you go, you’d have a foundation for life.”

Nanyi’s eyes gradually brightened.

That was exactly what she had been desperately seeking. When that jade bracelet shattered, she had already given up hope of finding Zhang Yuehui. Placing hope in others could never last long. Those who journey forward rely on their own legs.

Xie Queshan only learned of what happened in Hukui Mountain the next day from Wanyan Jun’s mouth.

Gusha had previously been domineering in military affairs, blocking Wanyan Jun’s path. There were only so many accomplishments to go around—everyone wanted a share, so no one could grab the biggest piece. Therefore, Gusha was essentially handed over by Xie Queshan for Wanyan Jun to trap, and the message was also delivered to Wanyan Jun by his people.

Song Muchuan’s letter had explained his strategic planning very clearly, not only hoping “Wild Goose” could help sow discord, but also hoping he could prompt Wanyan Jun to use explosives. But in the end, Xie Queshan didn’t suggest the explosives idea. First, Wanyan Jun was inherently someone who loved using gunpowder for surprise attacks. Second, the only way to quickly bury both groups in the tunnel was this method. Letting Wanyan Jun figure it out himself was more silent than pointing it out directly.

Now that Wanyan Jun had achieved great victory, he naturally wanted to do Xie Queshan a favor, promising not to pursue Madam Gantang’s faults.

After all, the Yucheng Army was already annihilated. To Wanyan Jun, a back-courtyard woman couldn’t stir up any trouble, while Xie Queshan was someone he wanted to win over—far more useful than that brute Gusha.

The joy on Xie Queshan’s face was somewhat genuine.

A heavy stone had fallen to the ground.

He knew this risky gambit had succeeded, and he had successfully extricated himself, washing away suspicion and regaining Wanyan Jun’s trust. Every step had to be precisely accurate, and the final success could be called tremendous luck.

He had placed all his bets on Nanyi. He was certain of her tenacious will to survive. He shattered her jade bracelet, leaving her a chance to escape, gambling that she would definitely go warn the Yucheng Army. Only if this step succeeded would there be room for maneuver in what followed.

And she never disappointed him.

In the end, the one who was disappointing was himself.

He was selfish and petty, domineering and dictatorial. Perhaps because his life contained nothing that truly belonged to him, he had developed possessive desires toward her. He was addicted to every detail of being with her—he just wanted to keep her by his side.

He used secret after secret to draw her into the game, making her sink deeper and deeper, unable to escape from beside him. How was he not humble? He thought that this way, she would consciously stay.

When he discovered she wanted to leave, he truly was furious enough to kill her. How could she betray him? How could he allow this blade he had cultivated to point at himself?

He should have killed her—whether to eliminate future troubles or root out problems completely—but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

Because none of this was her fault. She was a living person with her own joys, sorrows, desires, and thoughts. What moved him were precisely these vivid, lively things. What right did he have to monopolize these, forcing her to become his puppet?

Only then did he decide to let go—let her go, let everything return to its proper place.

But some mistakes had already been made. He couldn’t simply release her so easily.

Even if he was to let her go, he had to consider her future and safety thoroughly. She had shown herself publicly in saving Third Uncle and secretly helped Second Sister procure supplies. If someone with ulterior motives discovered something from these traces, she would certainly be in danger. Yet she didn’t know what position she was in—she thought herself an ordinary person, but there was no going back.

The Bingzhu Division outside Li Du Mansion would at most follow Song Muchuan’s instructions to meet Nanyi at the ferry. No one would care for her beyond that—the agents all had endless worries on their hands, and she wasn’t any important figure.

Moreover, once she reached the south, what would she rely on to establish herself? A woman alone with money—wasn’t this practically begging to be coveted in chaotic times? Should she rely on that unreliable, ethereal fiancé? Or depend on Song Muchuan, who was barely managing himself? He was more afraid she’d be deceived by some smooth-talking scoundrel and lose both person and wealth.

The intelligence about the Yucheng Army was a favor he gave to Nanyi. By having her save the Yucheng Army, the army would protect her, Bingzhu Division would respect her, and Song Muchuan would understand her worth, protecting her more thoroughly. Bingzhu Division wasn’t a good place for ordinary people—living on knife’s edge, extremely dangerous—but for her, already caught in the game, it was reliable backing.

This man-eating world wouldn’t wait for her to grow slowly before stirring up storms. Dangers lurked everywhere, and he could only use the method of placing her in mortal danger to forge growth, pulling up seedlings to help them grow. He wouldn’t let her remain duckweed forever—only after finding her roots could he let her leave.

She was merely a passerby in his long life. They traveled together for a stretch—nothing more. Those illusory feelings would soon dissipate with time’s passage. He was accustomed to being a villain, so he didn’t need her gratitude. Hatred and fear were actually preferable.

This kind of farewell was right.

He had always considered himself a dead man, a shell. Only this way could he survive. The seven emotions and six desires of mortals were reversed in him—he had to hate what he loved, love what he hated, to struggle forward step by step. No one in this world didn’t want to receive love from family, friends, even lovers, but he had to push all these things far away.

Any trace of greed or attachment would be like a thousand-mile dike destroyed by ant holes.

This was the last time he would think of her. He hoped her future would be bright as brocade, that someday she would live the life she yearned for.

Then forever and ever, may she never encounter him again.