When she opened the door, she had seen the change in his eyes. He had never looked at her with such fervent gaze, as if enchanted and amazed by her. He had never kissed her in such a way either—dominantly passionate until she could barely withstand it. He had even pulled apart some of her clothing, leaving his marks on her body.

He was possessing her, and this made her so joyful that her very soul trembled.

Now he was telling her not to come over!

She’d be damned if she listened to him!

Shen Xiling approached Qi Ying with annoyance, no longer embracing him from behind but circling to his front and nestling into his arms. Looking up at him, she said petulantly, “Why can’t I come close? I want to come close! And I’m not letting go!”

She seemed somewhat angry, her little face puffed up with indignation and showing some grievance, as if reproaching his heartlessness. This made Qi Ying feel both heartache and helplessness.

The young lady was still young and didn’t yet understand matters between men and women. She didn’t know how difficult his restraint was at this moment. He couldn’t speak directly about it, so he could only endure with difficulty while holding and coaxing her, saying, “All right, all right, I was wrong. Everything is as you wish…”

After he coaxed her for a while, Shen Xiling finally became happy—she was actually quite easy to appease. As long as he yielded slightly, she wouldn’t throw tantrums.

She magnanimously snuggled against him in his embrace, giggling again while pulling his hand and saying, “Aren’t we being a bit ridiculous like this? I keep feeling like we’re doing something naughty…”

She laughed brightly and innocently, harboring no resentment in her heart. She seemed to feel no displeasure whatsoever about their sneaky, affair-like circumstances. But Qi Ying felt very sorry for her and also guilty. He held her in silence for a long while before saying, “I’ve handled this improperly. I should…”

Before he could finish, she stopped him.

Her delicate white finger pressed against his lips, her brow furrowing as she said, “You’ve done nothing wrong, and there’s nothing you should do. I’m very happy, very very happy, absolutely nothing displeases me.”

Qi Ying looked at her, the emotions in his eyes deepening, momentarily silent.

Perhaps they truly no longer needed words between them. Especially now when silence was better than speech, Qi Ying embraced her.

The young lady was cheerful, leaning quietly and gently in his arms, only pulling at him to ask, “Do you have to leave in a bit? Do you still have social obligations and dinner?”

Qi Ying made a sound of agreement, then heard her ask, “Who are those people? I’ve never seen them…”

He smiled and answered, “This year’s new graduates, the top three.”

She seemed to find this somewhat novel, making an “oh” sound and laughing again, saying, “That’s very impressive—let me treat for this meal then.”

Her grand gesture amused Qi Ying. He pulled her from his embrace, reached out to tap her nose, and said, “Little miss, displaying wealth so openly isn’t good.”

Shen Xiling liked when he called her “little miss”—it always gave her an extra feeling of being cherished. She wrinkled her nose and said, “I don’t care, it counts as mine anyway.”

After muttering this, she looked at Qi Ying somewhat mischievously and asked, “Is Young Master embarrassed to spend my money? Actually it’s fine, since I’ll have to earn money after we leave Jiankang anyway. Young Master might as well adapt in advance.”

She spoke half-seriously and half-jokingly, very endearing. Qi Ying also laughed, thought for a moment, and said to her, “In that case, I’ll accept this exploitation for now.”

“Go ahead and exploit,” she laughed until her eyes curved, then added tenderly, “Only for you.”

He laughed, and she laughed along, sweetness overflowing in her heart. She took his hand again, looking at him with those dew-touched eyes, saying, “I even put on makeup today… Why doesn’t Young Master praise my beauty?”

Her expression was quite meaningful—partly showing a young girl’s innocence and shyness, partly carrying a mature woman’s charm and allure. What was most devastating was that she knew she was beautiful and knew her beauty had already stirred this man’s heart, giving her a small sense of triumph. She looked a bit wicked, but this made her even more lovable.

Qi Ying smiled, willingly letting himself be enticed. His finger gently touched her cheek as he asked in return, “When are you not beautiful?”

She had been teasing him, but with this one sentence he turned the tables and gained the upper hand, making her blush instead.

Shen Xiling felt somewhat frustrated while simultaneously feeling even sweeter. She leaned into his embrace again, tugging at his sleeve and saying, “Then am I especially beautiful today…”

He held her, smiling as he answered, “Mm, especially beautiful.”

Her face grew redder. Looking up at him, she asked again, “Then… then how beautiful would you say?”

After asking such shameless words, she wanted to crawl into a hole, but he considered this quite seriously, his expression also very tender. He lowered his head to gently kiss her and answered, “I think of you waking and sleeping, tossing and turning restlessly.”

The graceful lady, I seek her waking and sleeping.

Seeking but not obtaining, I think of her waking and sleeping.

Leisurely, leisurely, tossing and turning restlessly.

—This was love talk both euphemistic and restrained yet direct and passionate.

Shen Xiling’s face burned with heat.

This person really… how could he suddenly say such beautiful words?

The two were intimate for another while.

Qi Ying couldn’t keep Li Wei and the others waiting long. After about the time it takes to drink a cup of tea, he had to leave first. Although Shen Xiling knew it was inconvenient to delay him, privately she was extremely reluctant to let him go. Though her hands released him, her gaze still clung to him, not permitting him to leave.

Qi Ying kissed her forehead and said, “I’ll come back to find you tonight, hmm?”

Upon hearing this, Shen Xiling’s eyes lit up, but suddenly remembering his previous record of promising to return but breaking his word, she switched to a suspicious expression and asked warily, “Really?”

Qi Ying smoothed her hair, smiling as he said, “Really, I’ll definitely return.”

The Northern Expedition was a court secret she didn’t yet know about. This battle could be won but not lost—he might have to personally go to the front lines to supervise. Counting the days, it wasn’t far off. This was no small matter; he should tell her in advance.

Shen Xiling didn’t know his plans and was still simply happy, finally willing to let him go. But when he reached the door, she stopped him again, lifting her sleeve to help him wipe away the bright lip color she had left on his neck, her face flushing red as wine while she wiped.

Qi Ying left first. After he and the new graduates departed together, Shen Xiling finally emerged from the third floor private room. When she asked the manager, she learned that Qi Ying had still paid the bill before leaving—he still hadn’t let her treat.

Shen Xiling felt both annoyed and amused.

This person… what could she say about him.

That evening, Qi Ying finally didn’t break his promise. Before the evening hour, he returned to Fenghe Garden and dined with Shen Xiling.

At the dinner table, Shen Xiling questioned why he had still paid the bill today. He only smiled without speaking. She complained a few more times, but later, unable to do anything about him, let the matter drop.

After dinner, the servants all withdrew, leaving only the two of them alone in Huaijin Courtyard. It was then that Qi Ying told Shen Xiling about the Northern Expedition.

The young lady was terrified.

Truly terrified.

At first, she couldn’t believe it, then she became incoherent, looking at Qi Ying and asking, “You… you have to go to the battlefield? But… but aren’t you a civil official? You’re not a general who leads troops to war—why do you have to go to the battlefield? Can’t they handle their own affairs properly? Why does everything have to depend on you…”

She was truly panicked, her speech becoming extremely rapid, looking completely at a loss. Qi Ying pulled her into his embrace, comforting her by saying, “Military affairs change in an instant. The intelligence I receive at the Privy Council always has delays—it’s not as accurate as being there in person. I’m not going to fight, just to supervise the army. There will be no danger to my life.”

But Shen Xiling wasn’t so easily convinced and remained extremely agitated. Qi Ying sighed and took her hand, saying, “After this matter ends, I’ll take you away—all right?”

Shen Xiling was so perceptive that upon hearing these words, she immediately felt something was wrong. She clutched his sleeve, panicking until she was nearly in tears, saying, “Is it for me? Are you going to war because you want to take me away?”

She was so clever that it left Qi Ying somewhat helpless. He pinched her cheek and said, “No…”

But Shen Xiling didn’t believe him, loudly saying, “Yes! You are!”

She began to cry.

Panic-stricken.

She understood. She understood.

He wanted to take her away, but he was such a person of compassion and responsibility, always seeming to feel that every blade of grass, every tree, every breath, every life was related to him. He couldn’t let go of these responsibilities, so he was so urgently going to war, pacifying the realm, so that after he left, Jiangzuo would still have peaceful prosperity.

It was all for her!

She cried even harder, crying while looking at him intently, saying, “Let’s not leave, let’s not leave, all right? This way you won’t have to worry, and you won’t have to go to the battlefield, okay? Let’s not leave—I don’t want to leave anymore, not at all…”

She became even more incoherent.

Qi Ying knew she had figured it out. Her worry and panic made his heart ache, and he could also feel the weight in her heart.

He wiped away her tears and asked, “Not leaving? Have you thought it through?”

She was very certain: “I’ve thought it through—we’re not leaving.”

He smiled, teasingly asking again, “If we don’t leave, my marriage to Sixth Princess can’t be delayed any longer.”

His marrying someone else would of course be an unbearably heavy matter for Shen Xiling, but compared to his life and safety, what did that count for?

Shen Xiling looked at Qi Ying very seriously and said with great certainty, “Nothing is more important than you being well—even if you have to marry someone else, even if we have to part forever, as long as you can be well, then I can accept it all.”

She wasn’t joking.

Even if losing him would make her wish she were dead, even if throughout the long years afterward she would feel her heart had nowhere to rest, even if she had to watch him grow old with someone else and have children.

As long as he was safe, then everything would be acceptable.

Qi Ying saw her seriousness. The certainty in her eyes was so deep it seemed somewhat heroic. He was deeply moved by this and loved her even more profoundly.

He stopped teasing her and looked at her with the same certainty and seriousness.

“Wenwen, I won’t choose,” his expression was grave, as if carrying the weight of a thousand jun, “I won’t abandon either you or this country. Since it has begun, I’ll see it through to the end.”

“You don’t have to choose either,” he said seriously and firmly, his gaze containing boundless waves and moon, “I won’t let you lose anything.”

Shen Xiling looked at Qi Ying, tears blurring her vision, her heart beating even faster.

She had always thought she already loved this person enough, loved him to the utmost limit that one person could love another. But later she discovered she could love him even more, because his goodness repeatedly exceeded her expectations.

He…

“Don’t think about anything, trust me,” he pulled her back into his embrace, his voice low, “When all this ends, we’ll leave.”

“I will always be by your side.”

Shen Xiling didn’t know what else she could say. She just kept crying in his arms, holding him tightly without letting go, not knowing if it was from sorrow or being moved.

She cried intermittently, clutching him tightly and asking, “You… will you be all right? Will you get hurt? Will you…”

She didn’t dare speak that word.

Qi Ying knew what she wanted to ask. He gently stroked her hair and said, “No.”

She continued crying: “Swear it!”

He laughed, accommodating her every request, saying, “I swear.”

But she cried even louder.

She had no way to change him and no way to help him. She could only watch him walk down the path he had chosen without looking back.

And she knew: if this path led to life, he would take her along; if it led to death…

…he would silently bear it alone.

Author’s Note:

The female goose is just super super beautiful!

Next chapter has a faster pace, whoosh whoosh like that, and the male second lead will finally show his face. Wenwen and Young General Gu’s first meeting is also coming soon (maybe in three or four more chapters).

PS: Saw everyone’s comments, very grateful. I’ll still try to preserve the original setting as much as possible. To avoid being lengthy, I’ll try to find a more concise way to write it. Thank you everyone! Bows