The round wooden rolling pin rolled across the chopping board. One hand skillfully rotated it, and the dough skin gradually became thin and translucent under the pulling and pressing.

Jiang Shi was planning to simply cook a pot of wontons.

However, as she rolled the dough, she heard crying sounds coming from the study. She froze immediately, inevitably feeling worried and somewhat hesitant as she gazed toward the window.

Her blockhead son had hardly any interactions with women in the past.

That Second Miss Jiang…

Could she be the one from the rumors who had some connection with him?

At the time, Jiang Shi had thought this was just gossip.

When neighbors and friends teased her, she only said that if there really was something between them, given that boy’s temperament of working silently without speaking, he should have taken a fancy to the girl early on and would marry her home sooner or later.

She hadn’t expected the young lady to come looking for him herself.

Looking at his dejected appearance, he clearly cared very much about the young lady, yet his cold attitude made even her, his mother, angry to see—as if he had swallowed bitter herbs.

Who knew what was said that even made the young lady cry.

Jiang Shi found the young lady pleasing to the eye. Rather than thinking whether the young lady was bad to her son, she pondered how her son was stubborn and inflexible, completely clueless.

Water boiled on the stove.

The dough skins had been rolled out enough.

She calculated the time, fearing that the young lady inside might not have eaten before coming early in the morning. Not wanting to go in and ask too many questions, she simply wrapped more wontons, pinching them one by one swiftly, waiting for the water to boil before tossing them in.

The crying sounds in the study only subsided after quite a while.

Jiang Xuening sat on the floor, hugging her knees, her gaze falling vacantly on the edge of Zhang Zhe’s coldly-colored sleeve robe, only feeling the cruel mockery of fate.

She had once thought that rebirth could salvage everything, starting over from the beginning.

But how could she have imagined—

That the person she cared about most, the one she least wanted to hurt, had also returned with memories?

While she cried, Zhang Zhe didn’t say a word, only staying by her side, allowing those sobbing sounds to tear apart his heart and lungs, giving him an intense feeling of being alive in this world.

Only pain and suffering were most profound.

And only when facing her would those vivid joys, angers, sorrows, and pleasures, along with greed, anger, delusion, and resentment that were usually deeply suppressed beneath his cold shell, crawl up and make him aware of his daily inability to extricate himself.

However, the price of being unable to control himself was too brutal.

Even recollections seemed veiled in a layer of blood.

That night in the deep palace corridor, she had lowered her brows and eyes, humbled her posture, pulled at his sleeve, and lied to him saying she would be a good person from then on, only begging him to help her.

The palace was full of hidden dangers.

Xiao Shu was pregnant. She was fighting fiercely with the Xiao clan, trapped too deeply. In that position, she could no longer withdraw, and losing meant death.

Zhou Yinzhi was her trusted confidant.

Ruthless and cruel, forming factions for personal gain.

Whether by law or by principle, he had no reason to spare this person. He should take advantage of the exposure of the other party’s factional activities and selling of official positions to capture them all in one net, thus not betraying his years of legal work and his lifetime of integrity.

But on the day of the joint trial, he sat high in the hall, looking at the evidence listed in the case files, lifting his brush but unable to put it down for a long time—

Once convicted, Zhou Yinzhi could certainly be eliminated, but Jiang Xuening was deeply tied to this person.

If Zhou Yinzhi fell, it meant she would die.

He wasn’t just deciding a case; he was deciding her life or death!

That was the first time in nearly ten years of serving as an official that Zhang Zhe couldn’t put down his brush, and the only time he acted out of personal favoritism…

Then came eternal damnation.

He could never forget—in the prison that reeked of decay and blood, when the jailer he knew well brought him wound medicine with unbearable pity, informing him of his mother’s death…

Jiang Shi lived alone with poor health. Upon suddenly hearing that he was imprisoned, she was heartbroken yet had to force herself to seek justice for him. She beat every injustice drum at every government office, crying to people saying: I know the son I raised—he couldn’t do such things! He’s an honest official, he’s a good official, he made an oath before his father’s spirit tablet…

But no one paid attention.

With no one looking after her at home, she fell down the steps one morning and never got up again.

A full seven or eight days passed before neighbors noticed something wrong. They set up a ladder to climb the wall and look into the courtyard, only then discovering it. Breaking open the gate to enter, the person was already…

Zhang Zhe never dared imagine that scene.

As a minister, he was disloyal.

As a son, he was unfilial!

Forget being filial by his mother’s side—even her funeral was helped along by court colleagues who risked universal condemnation, while he, the son who received his mother’s grace, couldn’t even go out to see her off one last time.

Jiang Xuening sat slumped, not moving at all, her heart dead with despair as she asked him, “Lord Zhang, you must have hated me, right?”

Zhang Zhe said, “I did hate you.”

Jiang Xuening said, “As it should be.”

Zhang Zhe fell silent for a while, then slowly said, “But how could I hate you? I was the disloyal one, I was the unfilial one. I was the one who loved you, and I was the one who harmed you. In the end, I could only resent and hate myself. Your Majesty, how could Zhang Zhe be so good? He was bewitched by you, betrayed his principles, disregarded the law, and became just another mediocre, muddled common man in this confused world. Don’t think about him anymore. He’s just a coward who doesn’t dare to love again. He’s not worth it.”

Jiang Xuening hugged her knees, shaking her head and choking up, “No, I’m the one who’s not worth it…”

She was too wicked.

Being in the abyss, coveting his loftiness, envying his integrity, she reached out her hand to pull him down from the high mountain peak, sinking him into the bottomless hell, destroying his everything. Even if she wanted to repay with her life, how could she compensate?

Between them lay good and bad, rebellion and filial piety, and that imprisonment that should never have happened, cruel torture, and even living human lives…

Even if they were both reborn, what could they do?

Those past events were too painful, too brutal. Even when she woke from midnight dreams she felt distressed and uneasy. How torturous and bitter must it be for Zhang Zhe when he occasionally recalled them?

Even immortal couples quarrel.

Even if she and Zhang Zhe were together, how could she know they wouldn’t expose each other’s scars over some minor displeasure in the future, or inadvertently hurt each other in some instant?

Both of them remembered the past—too fragile.

Jiang Xuening said, “You didn’t want me to know that you too were reborn and returned, because you didn’t want me to feel guilty and wished me to be free. But the one I love is precisely you. How can I not pursue you, not seek you out? I felt at ease, thinking everything could start over from the beginning, so I wanted to get to the bottom of things. Who would have thought that it would make all your efforts go to waste. You understand me too well, Zhang Zhe…”

Zhang Zhe remained silently still.

But Jiang Xuening felt she had never been this sorrowful before. “You’re not a coward—I am.”

If two people were to be together, how could Zhang Zhe hide such a secret from her for a lifetime?

When she found out then, how could she bear it?

But if he told her early on…

How could she love him, think of him, pursue him without feeling at ease and without guilt?

How she treated Xie Wei in the previous life was how she would treat Zhang Zhe in this life.

In the previous life, she had become the high and mighty empress, but Xie Wei knew from when they traveled to the capital together that she was nothing but a crude country girl who knew nothing. So she despised Xie Wei. If not for his high position and power, she might have found some excuse early on to banish him from the capital, unwilling to recall those past events she didn’t want to remember.

In this life she wanted to be a good person again, but Zhang Zhe who had been reborn had seen all her wickedness, all her wretchedness. She clearly loved this person, yet had caused him to be imprisoned, his widowed mother to die, his pure reputation to be destroyed. Upon seeing him she felt herself wicked, upon thinking of him she felt guilt. How could she endure the torment and be willing to see him constantly?

Toward Xie Wei it was disgust.

Toward Zhang Zhe it was guilt.

But essentially there was no difference—she was unwilling to face that wretched self from the past, and didn’t dare approach Zhang Zhe even one step closer.

Jiang Xuening raised her head to look at him, only then discovering that this cold face before her eyes, these calm eyes, were indeed no different from the previous life.

And his handwriting was the same as later on.

So many clues—she just hadn’t discovered any of them.

But…

A fear suddenly surfaced in her heart. Jiang Xuening’s long lashes were soaked with tears, her voice trembling as she asked him, “No, that’s not right. That day when they forced the palace, those upright officials at court all submitted memorials demanding I be buried with the emperor and hand over the imperial jade seal. I agreed, and Xie Wei also promised me he wouldn’t kill you. How could you be like me…”

How could he be reborn like her?

In this moment, hatred suddenly drilled out from her heart. Her body tensed tightly as she immediately tried to stand. “He broke his word! Xie Ju’an broke his promise to me!”

However, a broad and powerful palm gently held her back.

Zhang Zhe silently raised his eyes.

He only recalled that day when that Grand Preceptor who had already toppled the court and swept clear the realm came to his unvisited prison cell and spoke those words as if they were light as clouds…

He gazed at Jiang Xuening.

His hand still held her hand.

After a long time, he slowly said, “No, he didn’t.”

Xie Ju’an didn’t break his promise.

Jiang Xuening immediately froze, looking down at Zhang Zhe from her higher position.

In those clear eyes, her reflection was mirrored.

But her mind was in chaos.

Until a thought passed through—her throat felt blocked with sand and stuck with knives. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to say, “You…”

If Xie Ju’an hadn’t broken his promise to her, then there was only one possibility—

Zhang Zhe said quietly, “The nation has its laws, families have their rules. When a prince breaks the law, his crime is the same as a commoner’s. Zhang Zhe was a criminal. The verdict had already been written. The crime was determined by law, the punishment determined by statute. Emotion cannot override law. I had already made enough mistakes. My crime deserved execution—why should I be exempted?”

No one had the heart to write his verdict for him.

So he wrote it himself.

The charges and legal statutes, all complete. Approved for execution after autumn. Pushed onto the execution platform, heaven and earth vast, the guillotine fell, head and body separated, blood splattering three feet—nothing more.

Jiang Xuening finally couldn’t stand steady and collapsed back down, staring blankly toward the window.

Yes.

That was Zhang Zhe after all.

She used old favors to coerce Xie Wei to spare Zhang Zhe, but Zhang Zhe had practiced law his whole life—what did he have to feel guilty about to anyone? Since he personally wrote his own verdict, he acknowledged his crime. Even if life and death were placed before him, he would choose the latter.

That’s why she liked him.

Jiang Xuening suddenly felt so tired, so very tired. She blinked and asked, “Did Xie Wei later achieve his wish and ascend to become emperor?”

Rather than a question, it was more of a sigh.

After all, with Xie Ju’an’s formidable abilities—exterminating the Xiao clan, executing the imperial family, staining half the capital with blood, and finally obtaining the imperial jade seal—ascending to the throne should have been as easy as turning his palm.

But unexpectedly, after Zhang Zhe’s long silence, he actually said, “No.”

Jiang Xuening suspected she had heard wrong.

She looked at Zhang Zhe.

Zhang Zhe recalled what he had heard during the time from his imprisonment to his autumn execution in the previous life, but said, “It’s all in the past. Your Majesty, those answers are no longer important.”

Jiang Xuening felt as dazed as in a dream.

Jiang Shi had already finished cooking the wontons. After much hesitation, she still went to knock on the door from afar.

Jiang Xuening hastily got up, feeling utterly disheveled.

She truly had no face to meet this woman who in the previous life had died at home because of her implication. Not daring to stay longer, she wiped her tears and was about to take her leave. But Zhang Zhe held her back and said to her, “Stay and have breakfast together. Mother must have cooked an extra portion.”

An ordinary bowl of wontons—though the dough skin was rolled thin, no precious ingredients were used. It was just chopped meat filling mixed with pepper and dotted with ginger. After cooking, it was served in a bowl, sprinkled with scallions, and slightly dotted with dried shrimp and rice vinegar.

The bowl was just an ordinary porcelain bowl.

Brought to the table steaming hot with wisps of white vapor.

Jiang Xuening sat at the table with Zhang Zhe and Jiang Shi like a puppet, picking up chopsticks but feeling as if she didn’t know where she was.

Jiang Shi kept glancing at the two of them, but worried that this young lady dressed in fine clothes wasn’t used to such plain food, she said somewhat awkwardly, “I didn’t know there would be a guest this morning. I bought fish when I went out, but it would take too long to prepare. So I just muddled through and wrapped some wontons. It’s really nothing presentable…”

Jiang Xuening’s heart ached.

Through the mist, her tear-blurred eyes opened as she only said, “No, Auntie, what you made is very delicious.”

Zhang Zhe sat beside her, silent and taciturn.

Ordinary common folk, marketplace families, domestic smoke curling up.

Yet everywhere revealed tender warmth.

A mouthful of hot soup going down warmed her heart. Jiang Xuening vaguely understood why he had her stay for this meal—he wanted her to let go. She ate the wontons one by one, but the more she ate, the more tears fell.

Zhang Zhe knew she was always particular about fine food and delicate cooking, eating small meals frequently. In the palace she loved to torment those cooks, and her appetite had never been large.

But she had eaten more than half the bowl and still hadn’t stopped.

His heart gave rise to an inexplicable, hidden anger. Unable to bear seeing her make things so difficult for herself, he reached out to take away her bamboo chopsticks, setting them aside. When he spoke, his heart had gone completely soft, only saying lowly, “Enough. Don’t eat anymore.”

But Jiang Xuening pressed hard against her heart, feeling unable to face this.

Jiang Shi noticed something wrong and hurriedly set down her bowl and chopsticks. “Yes, our small household doesn’t have so many rules. I was worried the young lady came early and might be hungry, so I served more. If you can’t finish it, just leave it—there’s nothing impolite about it.”

She was better off not speaking.

Once she spoke, Jiang Xuening was already weeping uncontrollably.

Jiang Shi panicked. “Oh my, don’t cry, don’t cry! I knew it—my blockhead son, his father died early, he’s been solitary and taciturn since childhood, not likeable. Though I supervised his studies, no one taught him how to please girls! Young lady, please stop crying. Whatever grievance you’ve suffered, tell me, and I’ll go back and discipline him!”

Jiang Xuening cried and laughed at the same time. “Lord Zhang is terrible.”

Zhang Zhe quietly watched her, his heart like a knife twisting.

How could Jiang Shi know the grievances between them? She immediately glared at Zhang Zhe and said, “Tell Auntie everything, don’t keep it bottled up inside. What obstacle in this world can’t be overcome? I’ll make him apologize to you.”

Jiang Xuening looked at Zhang Zhe, saying as softly as a dream, “Lord Zhang is terrible precisely because he’s too good. You’re too good as well…”

Jiang Shi froze.

But Jiang Xuening knew she had stayed long enough. Standing up, she bowed deeply to Jiang Shi. Her eyes washed by tears were especially clear as she said, “Thank you for your hospitality, Auntie. I came out without informing my family. I should take my leave now.”

Jiang Shi was bewildered.

But Zhang Zhe said, “I’ll see you out.”

He walked ahead, pulling open the door bolt and opening the gate.

Jiang Xuening walked out with him.

The clamor of the mundane world suddenly rushed toward her.

She stood for a long while, then suddenly turned back to embrace Zhang Zhe, tightly, closing her eyes in his embrace. “Just let me hold you for a moment.”

Zhang Zhe ultimately didn’t move.

Jiang Xuening said, “Lord Zhang, you’re so good—how can I forget you in the future?”

Zhang Zhe answered, “Meet someone better.”

Jiang Xuening said aggrieved, “You’re lying to me. There’s no one better than you.”

Zhang Zhe fell silent, then after a while said, “Then meet someone more suitable.”

Jiang Xuening coveted this bit of warmth.

Even in the previous life, they had never been this close, because she was the empress and he was a minister. In this life they were clearly closest yet also furthest apart, because neither of them had the courage to love as if nothing had happened despite the bloody past.

She smiled. “What I like is what’s suitable. If I don’t like them, how could they be suitable?”

What “more suitable”?

Zhang Zhe remained silent for a long time.

Jiang Xuening raised her head and said, “Lower your head and I’ll tell you a secret.”

Zhang Zhe looked at her for a long moment, then lowered his head as she said.

She stood on tiptoe, with infinite attachment, to gently kiss his forehead.

This time, it was she who transgressed against him.

Then she stepped back three paces, smiling quietly and peacefully. “No matter what you think, actually from the time I met you at the summer retreat and saw you so tactless about avoiding suspicion that you’d rather go out in the rain, I wanted to possess you. Why couldn’t such an unromantic court official be used by me? It’s just a pity—I lost my heart, suffered complete defeat, and you didn’t win either. So my feelings for you aren’t because you saved me, protected me, or because of guilt, but because it was love at first sight.”

She thought Zhang Zhe would be stunned.

But unexpectedly, he gazed at her tenderly and actually smiled slightly, slowly saying, “I know.”

In this moment, a thousand sorrows and myriad feelings truly intertwined at the bottom of her heart, flowing endlessly, yet ultimately became brilliant.

She looked up, not wanting to shed more tears.

Feigning indifference, she snorted. “When you smile you look so good, yet in past years you were so stingy with me, not giving me even a pleasant expression. I’m leaving!”

Zhang Zhe said, “All right.”

Jiang Xuening added, “Although there aren’t many young ladies in this world better than this empress, this empress permits you to find one not quite so good. Don’t shortchange yourself—if she pleases your heart, marry her home.”

Zhang Zhe also said, “All right.”

But he didn’t tell her: There are many young ladies in the world with better characters than you, but I don’t love any of them, nor do I want to marry them.

When Jiang Xuening finished speaking, she said again, “I’m really leaving now.”

Zhang Zhe still said, “All right.”

Jiang Xuening cursed him. “Unromantic, stubborn and hard, a rotten piece of wood! Anyone who likes you must have had terrible luck, lost their mind, and gone blind!”

Zhang Zhe didn’t retort.

Jiang Xuening stamped her foot and left.

But Zhang Zhe stood behind, watching her walk out more than ten steps with her body held stiff. When she reached the alley entrance, she finally couldn’t hold it in anymore. Her shoulders shook, she raised her hand and lifted her sleeve to wipe her face.

People passing by all looked at her in surprise.

She walked all the way out of the alley entrance. Her figure, made ghastly pale by the daylight, gradually became submerged by other figures and voices.

Zhang Zhe’s heart felt as if someone had hollowed it out.

Jiang Shi came out from inside and watched for a long while. She sized up Zhang Zhe standing rooted in place and said tentatively, “I think that young lady is actually very good.”

Zhang Zhe said quietly, “She is very good.”

But ultimately she wasn’t his.

Jiang Shi looked in the direction he was looking but couldn’t help feeling bewildered.