“How did you get in here?” Yun Ye suddenly thought of this question. If just anyone could freely enter and exit the Court of Judicial Review’s prison cells, his little life would be lost sooner or later. This matter needed to be clarified.
“Don’t worry, your guards are impenetrable. Big brother here spent five hundred strings of cash to buy an inferior jade Buddha worth two strings to get through to Court of Judicial Review Minister Dai Zhou, who gave big brother a written order. Only then was I able to enter. Who knew that six guards from the Eastern Palace were standing outside your cell, and six people dispatched by Her Majesty the Empress were also there. Big brother’s things that I sent in were all carefully inspected by them before I could enter.”
After hearing He Shao’s smug explanation, Yun Ye’s throat tightened. Pointing at the empty bowl that had contained cheese, he asked Old He: “This was also inspected?”
Old He had long been dissatisfied with Yun Ye’s fastidiousness. He said carelessly: “Naturally. Two fellows tasted it and said it was delicious. Of course—can just anyone buy meat pies and cheese from Granny Cao’s place?”
Yun Ye leaned against the wall and dry-heaved a few times. He finally completely understood why Li Ke had such great resentment about eating leftovers.
“Oh, I almost forgot to ask you—what does your spending five hundred strings on garbage have to do with Dai Zhou giving you a written order?” Having finally suppressed the nausea, Yun Ye asked Old He about Dai Zhou. Old Dai was a representative figure known for being as clean as water and as clear as a mirror. Putting him together with five hundred strings of cash seemed strange.
“Don’t slander Minister Dai! Old Dai has always been impartially just. Where would he do such disgusting fly-camp-dog-gou things? If I sent five hundred strings directly to Old Dai, I’d probably be immediately thrown into prison. Big brother here merely willingly spent five hundred strings to buy a jade Buddha worth two strings. What’s wrong with a willing buyer and seller transaction? It’s just that things were somewhat coincidental—that shop just happens to be opened by Old Dai’s concubine’s brother, that’s all.”
Old He was very dissatisfied with Yun Ye’s casual accusation that Old Dai had accepted bribes. He made a righteous and stern explanation. Old Dai took the money and handled the matter—what more could you be dissatisfied with? There weren’t many good officials as honest as Old Dai in this world. You absolutely couldn’t pin the hat of corrupt official on him. Besides, if Old Dai didn’t open a shop, with just his salary, how could he support four concubines and a large household? Chang’an rice was expensive. Without some gray income, did you expect Old Dai to drink the northwest wind?
“If I used that chest of gold Tian Xiangzi gave me to buy a single iron nail from Old Dai’s concubine’s brother’s shop, would I be released tomorrow?” Yun Ye asked Old He thoughtfully.
“Dream on! Without my decree, even if you moved all the gold in the world over here, it would be useless.” At some unknown time, Li Er stood outside the prison cell with his hands behind his back. He seemed to have been standing there for quite a while. Beside him, Dai Zhou, who kept sucking in cold air, seemed to have a terrible toothache—sweat was already forming on his forehead.
Before Yun Ye could pay his respects, Li Er said to He Shao: “Get out. I’ll settle accounts with you later. You’ve completely lost face for Great Tang’s meritorious nobility.”
He Shao rolled and crawled out of the prison cell. Li Er looked at Dai Zhou and said to him: “Should your family’s business be shut down?”
Dai Zhou cast a resentful glance at Yun Ye and said repeatedly: “From now on, there will be no more shop. The shopkeeper should also return to his hometown to farm.” Having finished speaking, he quickly left, whether to settle accounts with He Shao or to close his family’s shop was unknown.
Li Er stepped into the prison cell. Immediately, a eunuch wiped the stool in the cell over and over, carefully placing it behind Li Er’s bottom. After His Imperial Majesty sat firmly, he bowed his head and left.
“Feel wronged?” After Li Er sat down boldly, his first question was whether Yun Ye felt aggrieved.
“Not this time. Receiving the ruler’s salary and relieving the ruler’s worries is my duty. Ministers are all Your Majesty’s hands, feet, claws, and fangs. How to use and move them naturally must listen to Your Majesty, this head. If one refuses to dig latrines because of fear of getting dirty, where would there be clean places in this world?”
Having become someone’s minister, one must have the awareness of being ready to be used at all times. If one wanted to maintain noble integrity, fleeing far to desolate mountains to become a hermit was a good choice.
“I heard it—you have no complaints about me, you’ve kept your duties well, yet from the bottom of your heart you despise prominent households. Why is this? You should know that the Yun family is also a prominent household. Although family members aren’t prosperous, you still count in Chang’an City.”
Li Er deliberately didn’t hear the words “this time” that Yun Ye said, and directly asked why Yun Ye was full of hostility toward wealthy families.
“Replying to Your Majesty, this minister has never believed that meat-eaters are contemptible, but rather believes that since one eats meat, one needs to have the qualifications to eat meat. It’s not necessarily that because your ancestors ate meat, you must eat meat. Without matching moral achievements, eating meat is a sin, because they gain without labor, encroaching on others’ blood and sweat to fatten themselves. This makes no sense from any angle. Some meat-eaters even get tired of eating meat and want to change their taste, finally setting their sights on people, determined to eat people. Such meat-eaters—this humble minister very much wants to put them in a pot and boil them, let them also know what pain feels like.”
Li Er laughed dumbly and said to Yun Ye: “Isn’t your academy educating one meat-eater after another? Can you guarantee they all won’t go eat people?”
“Your Majesty, what do you mean ‘my academy’? It’s your academy. I’m merely using it to realize my dreams. The one truly using it is you. The one benefiting will also be our Great Tang. This humble minister only wishes to attach myself to Your Majesty’s swift steed’s tail, galloping thousands of miles, to see just how far our Great Tang can go.”
Yun Ye’s heart ached slightly. The academy was the thing he most wanted to accomplish after coming to the Tang Dynasty. If comparing the academy with life, Yun Ye felt his little life no longer seemed so important. Must attach to the imperial family, must attach to the imperial family. In this realistic world, only by attaching to the imperial family could the academy survive long-term. Right now it was too weak. Only when it grew strong enough to resist any storm would be when it truly exerted its power.
“Hmph! I sent two sons into the academy, enduring ministers’ impeachments and not letting them go to their fiefs, isn’t it just to see what capabilities the academy actually has? So far it’s not bad. But boy, you’ve set your sights on those two. Don’t regret it in the future. Dragon sons, dragon sons—boy, you need to know that dragons eat people. This is a truth that hasn’t changed in ten thousand years. Don’t think that just because you’ve temporarily put covers on the dragon sons’ claws and fangs, you won’t discover one day that dragons are dragons. Even with covers on, they’re still dragons.”
Yun Ye didn’t know where Li Er’s narcissism came from. In history, he manipulated all his ministers at his fingertips, yet he misjudged all his own children. That’s right, completely misjudged them all. He forced Chengqian into becoming a deviant, induced Qing Que into becoming an idiot, confused Li Ke with false hope until he was dizzy, Gao Yang became a debauched woman—and a debauched woman who rebelled at that. Lan Ling he used as a bargaining chip to control the Dou family, never having a happy face for her entire life. How many of his children died well? Did he have the qualifications to evaluate them?
Still saying dragons are dragons—did that creature truly exist? If you have the ability, find one to show me! If Chengqian and the others became violent, it was also because of your influence, you lunatic. Your power had no constraints whatsoever. Whatever you thought in your head was truth. You took it for granted that your children should be like you. You went mad for power—must your children also go mad for power?
Chengqian was a very good youth. Qing Que was a clever youth. Li Ke was a persistent youth. If the three children didn’t take wrong turns, they all should become top figures in this world. The world was so big. You, Li Er, had the ability to give them space to display their talents, yet you forcibly kept them locked in Chang’an City, making them drool over the imperial throne. Even a good person, after enough time, would become a deviant. Don’t think this old man doesn’t know—the evil training methods of those Eastern Ocean people were probably taught by you. I most look down on this kind of bastard who trains good children into evil spirits.
“Boy, your look is very strange. Could it be that what I said isn’t right?” Li Er was in the midst of elaborately commenting on his several children’s strengths and weaknesses when he discovered Yun Ye was spacing out, so he was somewhat displeased.
“Not at all. This humble minister is repeatedly pondering Your Majesty’s golden jade良言 words of wisdom. Truly every word is a pearl, the analysis penetrating to the core. It could be said that every slap draws blood, every whip leaves a mark. Your insights into the several princes truly make this humble minister’s blocked understanding suddenly open, awakening to sudden enlightenment, with the feeling of clouds parting to reveal the sun. This further strengthens this humble minister’s heart of admiration for Your Majesty. Your description of dragons simply makes this humble minister sigh in admiration.”
Flattering Li Er required choosing the right moment. Greatly praising him in his most proud domain, scratching an itch must scratch the itchy spot—naturally this would achieve twice the result with half the effort. For example, right now was an excellent opportunity to flatter.
“After hearing Your Majesty’s description of dragons, this humble minister couldn’t help but recall that my teacher also had a description of dragons. I wonder if Your Majesty has interest in hearing my teacher’s description?”
Flattery naturally must be comprehensive. Yun Ye was very clear about Li Er’s purpose in coming today—it definitely wasn’t to discuss the princes’ education issues. When he learned from He Shao that Dou Zhong had become the Dou family’s new family head, Yun Ye’s mind immediately conjured the image of that fellow he’d seen early one morning outside the palace a year ago when looking for Li Anlan. Thinking back now, that fellow had no characteristics besides wretchedness. Wanting this old man to be a stepping stone for the newly born Dou family? No way!
“Your teacher was a generation’s worthy sage. What he said and discussed must be extraordinary. Speak quickly—I wash my ears to listen respectfully.”
“One day, the sky darkened as if about to rain heavily. Dark clouds churned in the sky, seemingly like two dragons fighting. This humble minister asked my teacher what dragons looked like. My teacher said: Dragons can be large or small, can rise or hide; when large, they stir clouds and breathe mist; when small, they hide their form in tiny spaces; when rising, they soar between heaven and earth; when hiding, they lurk within the waves. Dragons change with the times, just as people who achieve their ambitions roam freely across the four seas. Your Majesty raised armies from Taiyuan, fought a hundred battles to gain the realm—just like a dragon flying through the nine heavens, stirring clouds and spreading rain, bringing peace to the world. Now the seas are calm and rivers clear. Our Great Tang will welcome a brand new era. This humble minister congratulates Your Majesty!”
Yun Ye used the most respectful tone to recite Cao Cao’s description of dragons from “Romance of the Three Kingdoms.” Old Cao’s appearance was indeed extraordinary. Listening made Li Er’s heart greatly pleased. Stroking his short beard and about to comment, he heard a detestable voice from outside the prison: “Your Majesty, Marquis Lantian uses clever words to confuse his superior, taking dragons as omens—this is great disrespect. Please, Your Majesty, severely punish this type who uses clever words and ingratiating manner. Otherwise, it will harm Your Majesty’s sagacity.”
“Who’s that?”
Li Er and Yun Ye glared at the newcomer together.