HomeThe Whimsical ReturnChapter 16: Grievances About Tents

Chapter 16: Grievances About Tents

As a clever person, Li Tai knew that if other people were to look at that bearded woman at this moment, she would surely appear as a saintly figure. He could only lower his head, and when he raised it again to look, his assumption was confirmed correct—that woman was conversing with Old Madam Yun, even compassionately taking the old lady’s walking stick and supporting her as they slowly walked forward.

Taking a deep breath to calm his irritable heart, he shouldered his younger siblings’ belongings and strode forward with great strides…

As they drew closer to their destination, the journey became increasingly difficult. Yun Ye could no longer slack off. Among the group of women were some titled madams who had lost their husbands, dragging along young children and carrying gifts as they stumbled forward. Their men had either died of illness or perished on the battlefield. Now, for the sake of their children inheriting their fathers’ titles, they were risking their lives to keep up with this noble procession. Once they fell behind, no one would pity them, and their children’s hope of inheritance would turn to bubbles.

The women were extremely stubborn, displaying the resilience of Guanzhong women to the fullest. How could women endure marching in the scorching heat? Sweat soaked through their thin silk garments until even their chest bindings were visible. At this moment, no one cared about such things. Old Niu took the carrying poles from the families of his subordinates who had died in battle and shouldered them himself. Old Cheng did the same. Zhangsun Wuji also had a carrying pole on his shoulder, and even Fang Xuanling bent down to pick up a young child…

The Grand Ceremony sounded impressive, but no one had ever considered its cruel nature. The pitiful sight of women who truly could not walk anymore kneeling on the ground and crying bitterly instantly filled Yun Ye’s heart with sorrow. To stand above others, the suffering one endured was truly beyond words for outsiders.

“Elder sister-in-law, this younger brother is being impolite, but for the sake of the little one, let’s not stand on ceremony. We must crawl there even if we have to crawl! Give your bundle to this younger brother, this younger brother will hold the child, and you hold onto this younger brother’s clothes as we press forward together.”

Yun Ye picked up the wailing child, put the bundle on his back, and let the woman grasp his clothes as they moved forward. Although his neck was being choked until he could barely breathe, he still resolutely strode ahead. Damn that Li Er—for the sake of your vanity, you’re tormenting me to death. Yun Ye would bet that at this moment, he wasn’t the only one thinking this way…

Finally arriving at the destination, after having the officials from the Ministry of Rites verify his waist token, all his energy drained away at once. He collapsed headfirst onto the grass, mouth open as he struggled to breathe, like a fish thrown onto the shore.

The woman with her hairpins and ornaments in disarray lay beside Yun Ye. If this were any other place, people would call them an adulterous couple, but here, who could laugh at whom? Everyone was exhausted like dead dogs. Those who lived pampered lives in normal times—who had ever suffered such hardship? After the child slept for a while in Yun Ye’s arms, he became spirited and tugged at his mother’s sleeve for food.

The woman got up and brought the child to kowtow to Yun Ye. Today, if not for Yun Ye’s assistance, the mother and child would not have made it here, and the rewards distributed after the Heaven Worship ceremony would have had nothing to do with them.

He took out two pieces of flattened cheese from his bosom and gave them to the mother and child, then gracefully departed. Doing good deeds without leaving his name had always been Yun Ye’s principle of conduct. Although that woman thanked him repeatedly as “Marquis Yun,” that wasn’t something he had told her, was it?

The nobles’ lives today were worse than beggars’. During the Heaven Worship ceremony, no fires were permitted. Fortunately, there was a bit of cooled boiled water available. Now, Great Tang nobles no longer drank wildly from streams—that was considered an uncultured and crude display.

Grandmother and Xinyue had some food there, but Yun Ye didn’t touch it. He retrieved his family’s corn carrying pole from the Crown Prince and sat with his grandmother under a large tree to recover his strength. Xinyue shed tears as she removed her shoes, showing Yun Ye the four or five large blisters on the soles of her feet, sobbing intermittently.

“Next time there’s something like this, let Na Rimu come instead. Even if she walked a hundred li, she wouldn’t complain. She could even carry a sheep without a problem.” Yun Ye had only just comforted Xinyue with one sentence when he noticed her eyebrows standing up.

“What is her status? Does she deserve to suffer such hardship? After I die, you can elevate her to proper wife status and then let her come—that won’t be too late.” As soon as she finished speaking, Grandmother slapped her on the back, scolding her for speaking such nonsense.

Chuckling, Yun Ye stuffed all the cheese from his bosom into Xinyue’s hands and prepared to look around. The Yun Family held a marquis title—perhaps he could score a tent. Spending the night in the wilderness exposed—this was preparing to feed everyone to the mosquitoes!

“You, yes you, come here. Where is this marquis’s tent? Lead the way quickly. I’m waiting to rest.” Yun Ye arrogantly shouted at an official from the Ministry of Rites. Having arrived at their destination, who still cared about a minor seventh or eighth-rank official?

This minor official was also an interesting person. Without even raising his head, he said, “My lord, you’re thinking too much. Tonight, even His Majesty needs to sleep in the open. You’d better save your breath. If you want a tent, you’ll have to ask the Grand Emperor for one. Only he has a few.” After speaking, he politely cupped his hands toward Yun Ye. He probably didn’t even see what this marquis looked like before turning and walking away.

The camp truly became a scene of wailing and lamentation. Various sighs and low-voiced curses filled the camp. Of course, they were all cursing the officials from the Ministry of Rites. No one dared mention how the Emperor was involved—they wouldn’t dare even with eight sets of courage.

Regardless, as high-ranking officials, they all needed to go pay their respects to the Emperor and, incidentally, inform him that they had crawled their way here. Seeing Fang Xuanling and Zhangsun Wuji straightening their official robes, he knew he couldn’t escape either. He wouldn’t bother straightening his clothes—he’d go just like this. Let’s see if it doesn’t disgust you to death. Covered in rank sweat, he simply wouldn’t wash in the stream. What could you do about it?

The result of doing this was being grabbed by Old Cheng and Old Niu and pressed into the stream water. They roughly scrubbed his head and wiped his face several times with a towel that reeked of sour smell. Grandmother and Xinyue helped him straighten his garments, and only then was he escorted by the two old lords to see the Emperor.

Li Er was in high spirits, keeping company with the Grand Emperor in conversation. Speaking happily, Li Er had no tent because he had a room—and quite a large one at that. Tonight he would probably sleep in this large room together with his children. It was inconvenient for Li Yuan to stay here, which was why he had his own tent.

Li Yuan was delighted when he saw Yun Ye. “Young man, tonight is a fine night. How about we have a grand gambling session here in this wilderness? I heard you’ve made a fortune, boy. I want to strip off some skin from you too. What do you say, boy—do you have the guts?”

Li Er smiled as he kept him company, his expression unmoved. This was only possible because it was Yun Ye. Li Yuan could casually greet and invite him. If it were any other minister, they would have been scared half to death by now.

Yun Ye properly paid his respects to Li Er, then showed his white teeth in a grin and said, “Grand Emperor, if you’re interested, this junior will naturally risk his life to keep you company. I just don’t know if your esteemed self’s stakes are generous enough. If you accidentally lose your tent to this junior, that wouldn’t be good. Making you sleep in the open tonight would be this junior’s fault.”

“Father Emperor, you must be careful! This boy has designs on your tent. Don’t let him succeed!” Empress Zhangsun virtuously brought a bowl of milk each to Li Yuan and Li Er. There were even osmanthus flowers sprinkled on top—the fragrance was captivating!

Li Yuan had a low threshold for laughter and actually laughed until he couldn’t catch his breath, coughing as he said to Yun Ye intermittently, “Every time I see you, old man is happy. Whatever you want, just speak directly. Whether you rob openly with your cards on the table, seize, or deceive—even when being a scoundrel, you do it openly and honestly. Good, good! What a good child! The tent I just gave to Yuanzhang—I’m taking it back. Old man wants to use it as a gambling stake.”

Even a fool could hear the implications in Li Yuan’s words. Li Er’s jaw muscles twitched twice, and his smile had become quite forced. Only Zhangsun said with a smile, “Whatever you give to your son can’t just be taken back at will. If you need stakes, your daughter-in-law will have the Internal Affairs Department send you another one. There’s no need to take back what you gave to your son.”

Li Er gave Yun Ye a look that seemed like a smile but wasn’t—cold and quite frightening. Then he turned his head toward Li Yuanzhang and said with a smile, “Yuanzhang, what do you think?”

Li Yuanzhang respectfully said to Li Er, “Whatever imperial elder brother decides. Younger brother’s body is healthy. Even if a scoundrel nearly took younger brother’s life, it doesn’t matter. Didn’t younger brother’s boat on the canal also sink inexplicably? As for the sound of the eight-ox crossbow, it scared younger brother’s soul away. I wonder if there will be eight-ox crossbows tonight?”

There were many members of the Li clan in the room, including cousins like Li Xiaogong. Upon hearing this, he was about to stand up to speak, but was forcibly pressed down by Li Daozong beside him.

Li Yuan shouted at the eunuchs and palace maids in the room, driving them all out. He then said gravely to Yun Ye, “Boy, explain this matter clearly and we’ll start gambling. You’re actually not really an outsider. Old man says you’re the Li Family’s son-in-law—I expect you won’t find that strange, right? Anlan has even borne you a child. Since we’re one family, it’s better to speak clearly.”

Yun Ye’s expression didn’t change at all. He still smiled and said, “Grand Emperor, if not for His Majesty’s strict order that I must not let you feel heartbroken, the head of the Prince of Han should have been hanging on Chang’an’s city gates long ago. How would there have been any chance for him to keep his life?”

Li Er nodded, acknowledging that he had indeed given Yun Ye such an order. Although it was actually Zhangsun who said it, that was the same as him saying it.

“Boy, old man knows something about your character—you value human relationships more than gains and losses. Tell old man the whole story of this matter, and old man will judge right from wrong.” After speaking, he glanced at Li Er, who smiled and nodded.

“The Grand Emperor is also well-versed in military matters. At that time, this junior was the commander of the Lingnan Navy, leading my fleet sailing on the canal. The tall military banner with the character ‘Tang’ fluttered loudly above. All boats on the river yielded, clearing the waterway for the army. Only after my army passed could they weigh anchor. I ask the Grand Emperor, at that time, wasn’t this humble subject’s authority the greatest on that river?”

“That’s correct. When the army passes, the four classes of people should avoid it—this is proper.”

“As a result, at that moment, an official boat actually approached the fleet. Because I knew it was the Prince of Han, this humble subject slowed the ship’s speed, wanting to let it pass first. Who would have known that on that official boat there were actually two naked women making seductive gestures? Then, this boat was turned into wood chips by this humble subject using a catapult.”

“Nonsense! You used dozens of catapults! Father Emperor, Yun Ye purely wanted your son’s life.”

Li Yuan said impatiently, “That was because he gave you time to escape. Otherwise, under the bombardment of boulders, you would have been fish food long ago. Boy, old man understands the principle that an army’s morale can be raised but not deflated. The matter of smashing the boat ends here. Why did you later use the eight-ox crossbow to shoot at him? This time, don’t say you didn’t want his life.”

Yun Ye cupped his hands toward Li Yuan and said, “Grand Emperor, you may not know that at the time, this humble subject’s boat was loaded with gold and treasures. One could say half of Great Tang’s treasury was on this humble subject’s boat. In the middle of the night, there were people watching from the shore. You tell me, Grand Emperor, if this humble subject didn’t use the eight-ox crossbow to shoot, what should I have used? Go ashore when the situation was unclear? If I shot him dead, that was his bad luck. If I didn’t shoot him dead, that was his good fortune. That’s all there is to it.” Yun Ye curled his lip. No matter how you argued this matter to the heavens, he was the one in the right.

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