Year 31 of the Yuanfeng Era, Fifteenth Day of the Fourth Month.

After the third watch drum sounded, I put down my medical texts and prepared to sleep.

Lady Liang suddenly arrived, aggressive in manner.

Suzhi followed behind her, frantically blinking at me.

I didn’t know what Suzhi meant and bowed faintly in greeting.

Lady Liang sneered coldly. “Shen Duruo, are you satisfied?”

I asked, “Satisfied with what?”

Lady Liang said, “Satisfied that the Crown Prince has come to detest me.”

I said, “That’s his business and has nothing to do with me.”

Lady Liang said, “We’ve been husband and wife for over twenty years. On every first and fifteenth, he would stay in my chambers. But because of you…”

I had heard about this matter long ago.

For four consecutive months, the Crown Prince hadn’t entered Lady Liang’s chambers. This had made her the laughingstock of the Crown Prince’s residence.

“Reflect on yourself.”

“Don’t push the responsibility onto others.”

“Or do you think I’m easy to bully and want to bully me again?”

If not for the fact that the child would be following her in the future, my words would have been even harsher.

Lady Liang bit her teeth. “Who would dare bully you? Even he gives you three points of deference!”

I smiled coldly.

Lady Liang said, “You’re just pretending.”

I shook my head. “I never pretend. When I smile, I smile. When I’m angry, I’m angry. When I want something, I want it. When I don’t, I don’t. Pretending is too exhausting—wearing a mask all day like I’m some kind of actor.”

These words somehow struck a nerve with her. Lady Liang suddenly covered her face with her handkerchief and began crying.

While crying, she said:

“I had schemed everything so well, wanting to please him. How could I have known you would be this kind of person? Had I known you were this kind of person, why would I have staged this whole charade?”

“This is called bringing disaster upon oneself.”

Hearing this, Lady Liang cried even harder.

I picked up my medical text on my own, ignoring her.

After crying for a while, she suddenly stared at me.

After staring for quite a while and seeing I had no reaction, she snatched the medical text from my hands. “Shen Duruo, are you even a woman?”

I looked at her coldly.

“If you’re a woman, how could you not like him? How could you not want to stay by his side?”

Lady Liang pounded the small table until it banged loudly.

“He’ll be the Son of Heaven in the future! Your glory and wealth, your Shen family’s glory and wealth… you’d have everything.”

I couldn’t reason with her, so I simply stopped trying.

Lady Liang herself felt it was pointless and left sheepishly.

The next day at the third watch she came again, not even bringing Suzhi. Regardless of whether I was annoyed, she talked to herself.

She said that when she was very young, she already knew she would be the future Crown Princess.

This marriage was arranged by Empress Xiaoren. Empress Xiaoren especially liked her.

To not disappoint the Empress’s affection, from age five she studied palace etiquette and the way of being a wife under a governess.

The governess told her that to be the Crown Prince’s wife, besides being learned, courteous, and understanding propriety, most important was treating the Crown Prince as your heaven.

Whatever the Crown Prince loved, you loved.

Whatever the Crown Prince didn’t love, you didn’t love.

When she grew a bit older, the governess taught her how to be the Crown Prince’s virtuous helpmate, how to win hearts for the Crown Prince, how to manage the household and supervise the palace consorts.

After coming of age, the governess taught her how to please the Crown Prince in bed—what positions to adopt, how to moan, even what words to say afterward. The governess said there were particular considerations.

For a full ten years, her entire life centered on one thing: marrying the Crown Prince and being a qualified Crown Princess praised by all.

She said that after marrying the Crown Prince, she did everything according to what the governess said, but the Crown Prince just didn’t like her.

Not only did he not like her, he found her dull.

She felt extremely wronged.

After stumbling along for two or three years, their days grew worse and worse. When Empress Xiaoren could no longer watch, she summoned her to the palace and lectured her thoroughly.

Only then did she understand that to live well with the Crown Prince, relying solely on what the governess taught was useless. You had to make the Crown Prince depend on you.

Just like the Crown Prince depended on his teacher Tang Qiling.

Tang Qiling had used his whole heart and blood, holding nothing back, spending it all on the Crown Prince for over ten years day after day, and only then earned the Crown Prince’s deep dependence on him.

Finally, Empress Xiaoren patted her back and said earnestly:

“Child, men are actually very easy to coax. Just treat him like a child. Wherever his eyes look, that’s where your thoughts should be.”

From then on, her eyes never moved half an inch away, unable to accommodate other people or other matters.

She learned from Tang Qiling, placing all her heart and blood on the man at her pillow.

When he was happy, she was happy.

When he was sad, she was sad.

Wherever his eyes looked, that’s where her heart went.

Later on, the Crown Prince only needed to cough lightly once, and she could distinguish what that cough meant, and what another cough meant.

Day by day, year by year, the Crown Prince’s dependence on her grew heavier and heavier.

She said she relied on this attentiveness to maintain harmony with the Crown Prince as equals. Even though she was late in bearing an heir, her position as Crown Princess remained secure.

But her heart was still anxious!

When a woman feels anxious, she can only redouble her efforts to please her man.

She said that to bear a son, she didn’t know how much bitter medicine she consumed, how many Buddhas she prayed to, how much suffering she endured.

Even ordinary wives who couldn’t bear sons found it hard to hold their heads up. How much more so for someone of her status?

She said the Crown Prince once had someone in his heart.

It was his junior martial sister, named Tang Zhiwei.

During that time, she didn’t know how much she feared Tang Zhiwei would be brought into the residence.

Tang Zhiwei was a talented woman of the capital. Though she knew a few characters, she couldn’t compose poetry or prose, and only knew a little of music, chess, calligraphy, and painting.

She had personally seen the tone Tang Zhiwei used when speaking to the Crown Prince—so confident, so natural and at ease.

But she—she never dared.

She said the older a woman gets, the more afraid she becomes.

Afraid her appearance would age, her figure would deteriorate.

Afraid younger, more beautiful women would enter the Crown Prince’s heart.

Afraid the Crown Prince would one day tire of her.

“Shen Duruo, do you understand this kind of fear?” she asked.

I shook my head.

Yes, I didn’t understand.

I wouldn’t even try to please my own parents, much less try to please a man.

I had him in my heart, but I had myself even more.

Seeing my indifference, she said through gritted teeth, “All these years, I’ve only stumbled with you. Why are you different from other women?”

Hearing this, I finally understood why Lady Liang had schemed against me.

The Crown Prince looked at me differently.

I was a female physician.

I was young and not too bad-looking.

Thinking it over, she decided to be a good person—both fulfilling the Crown Prince and demonstrating her magnanimity and selflessness as the legitimate wife.

I asked her, “Since you regret it now, why did you do it in the first place?”

Originally, it was she who insisted on inviting me into the Crown Prince’s residence.

She said very calmly, “Because you know the Thirteen Ghost Gate Needles and are useful to His Highness.”

His Highness again.

Only His Highness.

I sneered. “When he and I engaged in intimate relations on your marriage bed, did you feel no discomfort at all in your heart?”

She shook her head, saying no.

Fine then.

She was ruthless enough.

She had erased her own existence—what discomfort could there be?

At this moment, Lady Liang’s face showed a smile.

A reserved, dignified, amiable smile.

“He likes it best when I smile like this. As long as I smile at him like this, he says his heart can quiet down considerably.”

“That’s not a smile.”

I shook my head. “That’s just your expression. It has nothing to do with smiling, much less with happiness.”

Lady Liang’s smile suddenly froze.

“You asked yesterday why I don’t want to stay by his side? Because I don’t want to smile for just one man.”

After hearing this sentence, Lady Liang didn’t speak for a long time.