HomeSki into LoveHe’s in My Heart, Killing Me (Part 6)

He’s in My Heart, Killing Me (Part 6)

Lunch was served in the public cafeteria, shared with regular skiers at the Changbai Mountain resort. It was the busiest time of the year, with people coming and going in a lively atmosphere.

“I heard the Wanda ski resort is so crowded today they’re limiting entry,” Dai Duo casually chatted with Shan Chong. “Staff are standing at the top, holding people back and letting them down one by one… It’s more like torture than skiing.”

“Why are there so many people?”

The man pushing the wheelchair turned his head slightly, his peripheral vision inadvertently catching the person in the wheelchair. Usually, she’d want to cover her ears after three sentences from her brother and frown after five, but now she was listening intently to their conversation with perked-up ears.

Shan Chong hesitated, wondering if they had said something extraordinarily interesting.

His lips twitched, but he remained silent.

“It’s the lead-up to the next Beijing Winter Olympics,” Dai Duo’s voice rang out. “It’s boosting interest… How many people in China were skiing a few years ago?”

“Oh, that’s good,” Shan Chong said.

“Good?” The young man scoffed. “Just wait. After the Pyeongchang Winter Olympics, when the four-year countdown to the Beijing Winter Olympics begins, ice and snow sports will become trendy. All sorts of characters will appear, along with various labels… It’ll drive you crazy.”

Discussing future events freely, the young man seemed unaware of the third person listening—

Compared to his demeanor at school, he now appeared relaxed, his eyes sharp with defiance.

As they passed some apparent snowboarding enthusiasts who recognized and greeted them, Shan Chong responded politely with nods, while Dai Duo barely acknowledged them with a glance.

He said what he wanted to say and did what he wanted to do.

…Not like a high school student at all.

More like a lone wolf in the forest, proudly and casually patrolling his territory.

Shan Shan turned her head, pretending to examine the food at the cafeteria counter intently.

In reality, her peripheral vision was completely focused on the person behind her… She was indeed watching very carefully.

She hid it well; no one noticed.

But she forgot about her annoying brother.

Finding an empty table to sit down at, Shan Chong supported the wheelchair with one hand and leaned down slightly: “So, what do you want to eat?”

Shan Shan let out a confused “Huh?”

“You were looking at the food options so intently earlier, staring without blinking,” Shan Chong raised an eyebrow. “Weren’t you deciding what to eat?”

Shan Shan: “…”

Dai Duo glanced at Shan Shan.

Her heart raced with guilt.

Seeing her blank expression, Shan Chong ran out of patience. He stood up and left, returning with three portions of rice and several dishes, including chopped chili fish head, which Shan Shan usually enjoyed.

Shan Chong placed that dish in front of her.

He was truly a thoughtful brother; if he had put it far away, she might not have dared to reach for it.

During the meal, Shan Chong sat across from Shan Shan, with Dai Duo beside her. The two chatted idly about skiing-related matters. Shan Shan discovered that men could be quite gossipy too—

When they got together, they also liked to talk about others.

At first, they seriously discussed ski jumping techniques, but somehow the conversation shifted to discussing other people’s jumping forms—

Dai Duo: “Last time, I think it was A Xian, his form was so off… In the air, if his legs weren’t strapped to the skis, I swear I could’ve seen an orange frog flying through the sky. I was stunned.”

Shan Chong recalled the scene and found it amusing, nodding politely.

Dai Duo: “The snowboard bindings are holding back his potential. For the first time, I was desperately hoping to see a teammate on alpine skis.”

Before Shan Chong could respond, a “puff” sound came from beside him. He turned to see his sister covering her mouth, coughing violently, her face red and eyes tearing up, clearly having choked on something.

Shan Chong reacted a bit slowly.

Dai Duo had already passed his sugar-free cola to her.

Shan Shan grabbed it without saying thanks and gulped down three mouthfuls. Her throat burned, and her mind went blank—

Her head buzzed, and when she could finally hear the surrounding voices again, she heard her brother ask: “Have you drunk from that? Just giving it to her like that.”

“I have,” the young man’s calm voice replied. “What’s the big deal? She was about to choke to death.”

“…”

Shan Shan clutched the can, her brain struggling to process. When she realized what had happened, she looked down at the can in her hand…

Three seconds of silence.

The color hadn’t faded from her face—thankfully, it was already red from coughing—so at least now the redness could serve as a cover.

Quietly putting down the can, she reached for a tissue to wipe the tears from the corners of her eyes.

Dai Duo turned his face towards her, his gaze bright and dark, fixed on the abnormal flush on his peer’s usually pale face: “How did you injure your leg back then?”

Few people directly asked Shan Shan this question.

He asked quite frankly.

So frankly that she was taken aback, unable to answer before Shan Chong, somewhat surprised, glanced at the young man sitting across from him and answered for her: “During training. She used to do figure skating… The ice skate blade.”

“Oh,” Dai Duo said. “So it has nothing to do with her brain?”

Shan Chong: “Huh?”

Dai Duo: “I thought maybe her cerebellum was also affected, causing swallowing difficulties.”

Shan Chong: “What?”

Shan Shan: “…”

Dai Duo looked serious, with no intention of attacking anyone: “I thought it was because of swallowing difficulties that she only eats bread for breakfast at school.”

Shan Chong stopped saying “Huh” and turned to Shan Shan, his expression becoming serious: “How can you just eat bread for breakfast? Aren’t there breakfast stalls outside the school? Can’t you buy something hot for yourself?”

Caught off guard by this sudden revelation, Shan Shan was stunned, clutching the can tightly, her fingertips making it crackle.

“Don’t you know? As her brother, shouldn’t you give her pocket money? The family gives her some too, right? So she gets two allowances a month?” Dai Duo said casually. “Maybe she’s saving up to buy an aircraft carrier.”

Shan Shan: “…”

Men’s mouths could indeed be gossipy.

Lunch lasted about an hour. Afterward, Shan Shan prepared to leave.

There wasn’t much else to do here, and she had “visited her brother” as intended.

Shan Chong had no opinion or thoughts on her coming and going, just saying, “Oh, you’re leaving? Alright then,” while bending down to put on his ski boots…

Preparing for the afternoon’s new round of training.

Shan Shan sat in her wheelchair, looking down at him putting on his ski boots, trying to think of a creative way to scold him—

At that moment, a paper ball flew over from the side, hitting her face and bouncing off.

She turned her head in confusion to see her crush standing nearby in his white snowsuit, clearly, the one who had thrown the paper ball.

“Leaving already?” he asked.

“What else should I do?” she countered.

“Addicted to riding transportation?” he questioned again.

“…” she fell silent.

After all, she realized this person truly couldn’t speak nicely—

Every word out of his mouth was like a dog’s bark.

Shan Shan didn’t respond. Dai Duo stood there with his hands in his pockets, thought for a moment, and then, seemingly inspired, asked: “Want to play for a while?”

Shan Chong looked up: “Play what? Aren’t you training?”

As soon as the man finished speaking, two gazes shot towards him—

One was quite frank, clearly saying “Nah, I’m not”;

The other was gloomy, for reasons unclear.

Shan Chong fell silent, not quite understanding the situation, and asked Shan Shan: “Haven’t you booked a ride?”

Shan Shan: “I have.”

Shan Shan: “What’s wrong, can’t I cancel it?”

Shan Chong: “…Why are you suddenly getting angry?”

Shan Shan: “I’m not.”

How did Dai Duo take Shan Shan to play?

This person was resourceful, somehow obtaining a snowmobile used for ski resort rescues.

In the afternoon, when the snow had been skied into poor condition, some advanced slopes were empty. He found a deserted one and, under Shan Chong’s silent gaze, put Shan Shan on the snowmobile.

Shan Chong stood nearby, feeling he should intervene.

But just as his lips parted, he saw Shan Shan’s hand already clutching the edge of the rider’s snowsuit, holding on carefully.

“If you’re going to ride, hold onto him tightly,” Shan Chong’s focus shifted. “You might fall off otherwise.”

Shan Shan tugged at Dai Duo’s clothes. He turned his head slightly, one hand on the snowmobile’s handlebar, laughed a bit without saying anything, and just pulled down his snow goggles.

He didn’t say she couldn’t hold on.

So Shan Shan didn’t hesitate.

Then, they set off.

Shan Shan couldn’t remember the last time she felt the fierce wind on her face in such an icy, snowy environment—

The wind, mixed with snow, brushed against her face. The icy wind felt like knives, stinging her face. Her hair flew wildly in the air.

Her face hurt, and her eyes could barely stay open.

But her mood seemed to soar as well.

It felt like returning to the past when she would sprint on the ice, jump, or spin, with the cold wind brushing past and the sunlight above becoming a spotlight—

No longer constrained by the wheelchair.

No longer subjected to the sympathetic or strange gazes of those around her.

The silver-white tree shadows rapidly receded around them. Her ears were filled with the whooshing wind, yet she could hear her own heart beating strongly, blood flowing hot from her heart to her limbs.

The snowmobile was clumsy and noisy. The rider in front suddenly braked on the mountainside, kicking up a wall of snow.

Amidst the flying snow—

She was caught off guard as her nose bumped into his back. A sharp pain made her yelp “Ay,” and she held onto his clothes tightly to avoid falling forward.

“Fun, isn’t it?” he turned his head to ask the person behind him, who was rubbing her nose.

She wore a windproof hat, all fluffy with cat ears on top. Only her nose and eyes were exposed, her big eyes watery, the tip of her nose red.

Hearing his question, her eyelashes fluttered as she looked up at him.

Dai Duo’s lazy smile froze for a moment as she gazed at him.

He pressed his lips together, subtly shifting his gaze away.

“Skiing can be even faster,” he said, taking off his helmet. “There’s a way to ski while sitting in a car. I tried it in Canada before, it’s similar.”

Shan Shan let out an “Ah,” but before she could speak, Dai Duo continued: “If you don’t like that, maybe try getting a prosthetic limb later and see if you can use a regular ski…”

“Um—”

“If you want to learn, I’ll teach you.”

“…”

Night.

In the girl’s room, only a desk lamp was lit, casting a halo of warm light around the lampshade.

The shadow of someone in a wheelchair was reflected on the window, swaying.

“Hello? Is this my dear brother? What are you doing?”

“My dear brother, you must be tired. Training for the Winter Olympics must be very stressful. Remember to eat well and sleep well!”

“Nothing special, just letting you know I’m home. And today, I had a sudden realization that prosthetic limbs might not be so bad after all. It’s not right to always sit in a wheelchair, is it? I was thoughtless before.”

“What? No, I’m not nervous because I did something wrong and speaking like a Korean translator! How unkind of you to say that. I’m just thinking that you’ll be competing in Pyeongchang in a couple of years, so I’m familiarizing myself with this style of Chinese in advance. You’ll feel more at home then.”

“It’s nothing extraordinary.”

“There is something.”

“Brother, I want a prosthetic limb. Will you buy one for your cute little sister, hmm?”

Under the desk lamp, on the desk, lay an open diary.

The moonlight from outside mingled with the warm light of the desk lamp. On a newly opened page of the diary, a short passage was written in dark blue ink, the writing not yet dry—

December 21st, Sunny

I think I’ve fallen for someone.

…Oh my!

It’s ridiculous, isn’t it?

I never thought this would happen, but it did…

Come to think of it.

Do you know what the greatest significance of liking something or someone is?

I suddenly feel that the answer to this question is quite simple.

It’s when an overweight person decides to lose weight.

It’s when a sickly person decides to exercise.

It’s when a sleepyhead sets their alarm for 7 AM.

It’s the college application form stuck in the upper right corner of the desk, visible when you look up.

It’s when an unkempt man shaves off his beard.

It’s when a woman who never bothered to wash her face picks up a lipstick.

It’s suddenly wanting to see the world you once had no interest in, and starting to live earnestly and diligently.

It’s at some moment, on some day, suddenly wanting to become a better version of yourself like never before, because when you gaze at that person (or thing) who seems so wonderful in your eyes, the light in your eyes reflects—

From then on, you decide to step out of that dark, stinking corner where you’ve been curled up because you too want to shine brilliantly.

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