*Do I?*

Su Man was lost.

Before this moment, she had never once questioned her feelings for Li Li.

After all these years, he was the only close friend she’d had. Both their families had long tacitly assumed the two of them would end up together. Even Li Li himself had joked about it more than once: *Don’t worry — if no man ever wants you, I’ll take you.*

That kind of joke felt like an implicit confession.

They argued often, but on many things he’d treated her well — bringing her gifts, taking her places. So when they were together, there was always a feeling that lingered just above friendship but hadn’t quite crossed into romance.

In her own heart, Su Man had accepted this relationship.

She’d always felt it was only a matter of time before things naturally fell into place…

Only recently had she begun to sense that things might not be moving the way she’d imagined.

When had it started to change? She couldn’t pinpoint it. She could see the shift clearly outlined before her, but couldn’t make out the reason behind it. She felt helpless — as if something were pushing her forward, carrying her passively along.

Lu Yuwen had been watching her in quiet stillness. When no answer came, he felt both a small measure of relief and a lingering unease. He chose his words carefully:

“Not answering — is that because you don’t like him, or because you’re… not sure?”

He paused, then added: “Or is it that you don’t want to say?”

Su Man looked at him with some difficulty. “I don’t know…”

Lu Yuwen thought for a moment. “If your thoughts are all tangled up and you’re not sure how to put them into words, how about this — I’ll try to help you sort through them. If I get something right, just nod. If I’m wrong, interrupt me. Is that alright?”

Su Man nodded.

Lu Yuwen said: “You and that boy grew up together. There’s the friendship of childhood, and then the stirrings that began in adolescence — all those feelings have layered together, giving you a natural warmth toward him. But you’re not sure whether what you feel is truly love. And you’re not sure whether he feels the same way about you.”

Su Man pressed her lips together, brows knitting.

She had always assumed she liked Li Li. But now, after hearing Lu Yuwen lay it out like this, she wondered — maybe her “like” wasn’t really liking at all? Maybe it was just a product of years of friendship and the particular emotions of youth combined?

And what about Li Li? Did he see it the same way? Was that why he’d never said anything clearly, never defined the relationship?

Lu Yuwen watched her for a moment and then spoke again: “Actually, there’s a simple way to find out what you truly feel. Picture this: he’s married someone else. What does that feel like?”

Su Man’s brow furrowed even deeper.

“Very… uncomfortable. But not… completely unbearable…” she said hesitantly.

Lu Yuwen looked her in the eyes. “And suppose — hypothetically — he knew it would make you uncomfortable, and still chose to marry that woman. What would you do?”

This time Su Man didn’t hesitate. Her answer came at once: “Obviously I wouldn’t do anything. He can marry whoever he likes. I’m not the type to cling and make a scene!”

Lu Yuwen almost laughed, the corner of his mouth curving. “So your real trouble is that you don’t know how he feels — and because of that, you can’t figure out how to approach things yourself. You don’t know whether to think of him as an intimate soulmate… or just an ordinary friend.”

Su Man thought it over earnestly. “Hmm… I think… that’s right.”

“As for figuring out how he feels — that’s actually simple too.” Lu Yuwen smiled. “The last time I called you Man Man, he got a bit guarded. Maybe he needs a little external stimulus. Why don’t you spend more time with me — see how he reacts?”

Su Man looked up at him, her lashes dropping quickly, as if she were suddenly uncomfortable. “…H-how do we… spend more time together?”

Lu Yuwen smiled and turned to look into the distance of the hospital grounds. “I’ve been meaning to check out a few of the well-known restaurants in the area. Going alone might attract the wrong kind of attention. Why don’t you come as my companion? We could help each other out.”

—