Hua Zhi let all her strength go and leaned against Yanxi, resting against him. She had done everything within her power — yet for all the authority the eldest daughter of the Hua Family might command, even she had no say over the birth, aging, illness, and death of another person. Whether in poverty or in wealth, in this one matter alone, all people were equal beneath heaven.
The two of them were like two small creatures licking each other’s wounds — laying bare before one another the hurts they had kept most carefully hidden. And when they had comforted each other enough, they would once again be the strong and formidable protectors the world knew them to be.
Because they had no one to protect them.
“Hua Zhi.”
“Mm?”
“Here in the capital… I must trouble you again.”
Hua Zhi raised her head and looked at him quietly. What she had never feared was the weight of responsibility pressing down on her shoulders — what she feared was change in those close to her. She feared the shifting of hearts, and she feared the sudden absence of someone at her side.
Gu Yanxi lowered his head and folded her hands together in his palms. “The late Emperor has passed on. The new sovereign is young. The Chaoli clan will not let this opportunity go. I fear I will not be able to remain in the capital for long — the Bureau of Seven Lodges must be dispatched to various places to shore up gaps and prevent them from finding any opening to exploit.”
This was to be expected. Hua Zhi could not and would not obstruct him. Only — “There are hundreds of officials in the capital, and there is the Empress Dowager. There is little need for me to play any particular role. The other imperial princes no longer have any strength to contend, so you need not worry there will be anyone else stirring up trouble.”
“I trust you more.” Gu Yanxi looked up and gave her a small smile. “Grandmother’s heart is first for Great Qing, and only then for the Crown Prince. The officials each have their own designs. I trust only that you will whole-heartedly think of Little Six, and plan on his behalf. I will hand over all the people and intelligence networks of the Shizi’s residence for your command. With those, together with the forces the Crown Prince can deploy, it should be more than sufficient should anything arise.”
Hua Zhi did not agree immediately. “Has something happened that I do not know about?”
“Nothing has, only…” Gu Yanxi pressed her hand to his chest. “This feels uneasy. I need to make preparations early.”
Hua Zhi looked at him for a moment, then gave a small nod. “I understand. I will give everything I have.”
“I am sorry. Knowing me has not made your life any lighter — it has only made your burden heavier.”
Hua Zhi bowed her head and smiled. “Whose fault is it but mine for being willing?”
Gu Yanxi was startled, then laughed — it was truly the most beautiful thing he had ever heard. Hua Zhi seldom said such things, yet whenever she did, it made a person want to offer up their heart to her then and there.
After all, this was the imperial palace, and remaining even one night was already a breach of propriety. Early the next morning Gu Yanxi sent her home. He was still wearing mourning clothes, so he did not pass through the gates of the Hua household, and instead took leave of her at the door. “There is no need to make the trip to Yinshan Pass again. Whether it is I or the Crown Prince, we will find a way to bring your family back as quickly as possible.”
Hua Zhi had been considering the matter for several days. She had wanted to make the journey — after all, it had been so long, and she did not know how her grandfather’s health fared. But she also knew clearly the state of her own body. After so much cumulative strain and depletion, she feared she could not endure the rigors of the road. If she wore herself down into illness, who would that serve? She would only be the one to suffer for it.
“Very well, I understand. I will write Grandfather a letter and send it through the Bureau of Seven Lodges’ channels, to ease his heart.”
Gu Yanxi exhaled in relief and readily agreed. He would do anything for Hua Zhi — his only fear was that she would be too strong-willed and carry everything herself.
It made all the difference whether Yanxi was present or not. Hua Zhi slept soundly — a heavy, dreamless sleep that swallowed entire days — and spent the next two days largely in bed, even alarming Shao Yao into paying a visit. The Empress Dowager was at last able to slacken somewhat and sleep through half the night. Little Six, catching sight of his greatest pillar of support, felt the anxiety in his heart settle at once, and finally found the courage to face his suddenly altered station. And the Bureau of Seven Lodges — at last took on the appearance it was meant to have.
Because of one person’s return, it seemed as though everyone’s vitality had come back as well.
On the day the spring examination was held as scheduled, Hua Zhi entered the palace.
“After the spring examination comes the palace examination. Has Your Highness chosen a question yet?”
The Crown Prince drew out a dossier, opened it, and glanced through it, then held it out. “The questions are all here. Please look them over, Grand Tutor.”
Hua Zhi took it without ceremony and read through them one by one, then asked, “Has Your Highness decided which one to select?”
“I wish to compose one myself.”
These questions were indeed all too middling and conventional. Hua Zhi set the dossier aside. “These scholars will be Your Highness’s first class of students — and in time they will surely be the pillars of Great Qing. It is best that the question be one that suits Your Highness’s own heart and mind.”
“Then these…” The Crown Prince pointed at the dossier, his gaze carrying a trace of hesitation.
Hua Zhi smiled. “Your Highness, you will be a sovereign at whose single word all under heaven stirs. No one may demand of you how you act or what you do. No one can sway you — not the Empress Dowager, not the Regent Prince, and not I. We can only assist you, not tell you what you ought to do.”
“And if my decisions are wrong? Should Great Qing be buried alongside my mistakes?”
“Our purpose in being here is to bear those mistakes on your behalf during the years when you are still permitted to make them, and to teach you never to make them again.”
The Crown Prince rose and moved to one side. Hua Zhi did not follow him as she once might have, going to tend to his emotions and comfort him — she simply stood and kept him company, waiting for him to come to terms with this truth himself.
“The Grand Tutor also carries great pressure.” The Crown Prince turned and looked at his Grand Tutor, who seemed rather more restored in spirit than before. “You are the sole Grand Tutor to the Crown Prince. If I do well, your contribution may go unrecognized. If I do not, all fingers will point to you, and every fault will be laid at your door. When one thinks about it — it truly is a thankless, exhausting task.”
“The pressure is real. I worry my own learning is insufficient, that I cannot teach you as much as I ought. But the rest of it I need not trouble my mind over. Noble Consort Zhen raised you well. Your Highness — your foundation is solid and steadfast. How could things not go well in the end?”
His mother — the Crown Prince thought of that serene, gentle woman whose smile had been so beautiful, and could not help but feel a pang of longing. It was so — the Grand Tutor did resemble his mother in some way. Not in appearance, but in some quality of feeling. Both were women who truly harbored no ambitions, who wanted only a measure of ease and freedom — and yet neither had ever managed to obtain it. One had died deep within the palace; the other had been tethered to this palace because of him.
“For this examination, let the question be: ‘How can another sleep soundly on the side of one’s own bed?'”
Hua Zhi lowered herself in a curtsy. “As Your Highness commands.”
“There is never enough learning when the time for use arrives. Grand Tutor, please begin instruction from tomorrow.”
“Yes.”
And elsewhere, Gu Yanxi had at last freed his hands. He made his way to the Hall of Ruyue, with Chen Qing following behind, dragging along the Fourth Prince, who looked utterly wretched — limp as a dead dog.
Looking at the room that had been sealed up completely from the outside, Gu Yanxi raised his hand, and immediately men stepped forward to pry the boards from the door.
Inside, Hao Yue heard the commotion and rushed to press herself against it. “Who is it? Is someone there? Who are you?”
No one answered her.
Hao Yue needed no answer. Simply listening to the sounds at the door made her nearly delirious with joy. She had been on the verge of being driven mad by the boundless darkness and silence — it did not matter who was outside, even if it were a dog she would be grateful to it.
Shortly after, the sounds stopped.
Hao Yue’s heart lurched. She hurried to press herself against the door and listen. The moment she leaned against it, the door was pushed open from outside. With no time to retreat, she sat down hard on the ground. Light poured in. Blinking through the stinging pain, she looked up through her tears at the figure in the doorway — so tall, so commanding a presence, and moving freely through the palace as though at ease in his own domain…
Gu Yanxi!