After leaving Yonghe Hall, Ling Jingshu’s expression darkened, her lips pressed tightly together.
Bai Yu, who attended Ling Jingshu’s side day in and day out, could guess at her thoughts and said softly: “Miss, it seemed just now as though the aunt-by-marriage was using casual jokes to probe the master’s reaction.”
If Ling Wuye and the Old Madam of the Ling family gave their approval and nodded in agreement, Ling Jingshu would have no recourse even if she were entirely unwilling.
Matters of one’s lifelong fate had to follow the word of a matchmaker and the commands of one’s parents. A woman had no say in her own destiny — truly lamentable and worthy of sighs.
Ling Jingshu tugged at the corner of her lips, yet her eyes held not a trace of amusement: “Given the Lu Family’s standing, if the Ling Family were to form a match with the Lu Family, it would be the Ling Family reaching above their station.”
Moreover, Lu Hong was gifted in both talent and appearance — by any measure, marrying him would not be beneath her. No wonder Ling Wuye and the Old Madam had both worn such pleased expressions.
Bai Yu furrowed her brow: “But Miss does not like the young cousin-master at all. What if the master agrees to this match — what then?”
Ling Jingshu let out a long breath, releasing the frustration coiled in her chest: “I will find a way to change their minds. You need not worry on my behalf.”
The precise means by which she would do so, she did not elaborate. Yet somehow, Bai Yu felt oddly reassured.
The Miss’s temperament remained gentle as ever, yet she was calmer and steadier than before, and had become a person of remarkable conviction. Having said as much, she must have already worked out a plan.
The two of them — mistress and maid — walked in silence the rest of the way back to Qiushui Pavilion without exchanging another word.
Ling Jingshu suddenly halted in her steps.
A slender, fair-complexioned young boy came into view, a joyful smile floating across his pale face: “Cousin-sister Shu.”
Ling Jingshu was in poor spirits and had no inclination to speak with Lu Qian. She said coolly: “Why has Cousin-brother Qian come to Qiushui Pavilion?”
Lu Qian seemed barely able to contain the agitation surging inside him. He stepped forward a few paces and lowered his voice: “Cousin-sister Shu, I came to find you today because there is something very important I need to tell you.”
Something very important?
What important matter could possibly exist between the two of them?!
Ling Jingshu frowned, a vague unease inexplicably rising in her heart, which she quickly pressed back down — that feeling had no place there: “Whatever it is, say it now.”
Lu Qian gazed at Ling Jingshu’s cold and indifferent face, and, overwhelmed by his own feelings, drew two steps closer: “This matter absolutely cannot be overheard by anyone. We need to find somewhere quiet and safe.”
Ling Jingshu instinctively stepped back two paces, widening the distance between them.
Lu Qian’s smile stiffened for a moment, then quickly resumed its natural ease as he smiled and said: “Cousin-sister Shu, shall we speak inside Qiushui Pavilion?”
Ling Jingshu steadied herself and nodded in agreement: “Very well — come along then.” Inwardly, she quietly speculated on Lu Qian’s purpose in coming. Could it be that Lu Qian had learned of the Ling woman’s intention to propose the match, and had come expressly to “deliver her the happy news”?
The number of servants in Qiushui Pavilion was not large to begin with, and finding a “quiet and safe” private place was not difficult. Ling Jingshu naturally would not lead Lu Qian to her own boudoir, and instead went to the west wing.
This was where Ling Jingshu ordinarily practiced the zither and read books. The room was modest in size and kept quite tidy. When the window was pushed open, it faced directly onto a crabapple tree.
A gentle breeze drifted through, stirring the branches and leaves into a soft rustling sound — lending the space a measure of graceful charm.
Bai Yu was quick-witted; without waiting for Ling Jingshu’s instruction, she withdrew and closed the door behind her, standing guard outside at a distance of about three or four meters. This way, she could keep watch on the maids coming and going at any moment, while remaining unable to hear the voices from inside the room.
“You came here deliberately to find me — what is it, exactly?” Ling Jingshu opened her mouth and broke the silence.
This was a rare opportunity for Lu Qian to be alone with Ling Jingshu, and the excitement and joy in his heart were beyond words. The words spilled from his lips before he could stop them: “Cousin-sister Shu, I have already convinced my mother — she will soon speak to our maternal grandmother and Fifth Uncle about proposing the match.”
Ling Jingshu: “……”
Lu Qian seemed not to notice the rigidity in Ling Jingshu’s expression and continued of his own accord: “You already rejected Elder Brother — he has no face to take you as his wife any longer. In the future, I will marry you, and for this entire lifetime I will be fully devoted to treating you well. I am twelve years old now; be patient and wait for me a few years. Once I come of age, I will immediately take you into my household to be my bride…”
“Lu Qian! Do you have any idea what you are saying?!”
Ling Jingshu could not bear to hear another word and cut him off sharply. The unease in her heart grew stronger and stronger; her expression was filled with wariness and guarded alarm: “The two of us are cousin-sister and cousin-brother — nothing more than that. I have never once harbored even the slightest other thought toward you…”
“I know that you do not like me enough yet.” Lu Qian fixed Ling Jingshu with an unwavering stare, a blazing intensity shining in his eyes: “But that does not matter. Once the two of us are betrothed, there will be no shortage of time to slowly cultivate our feelings.”
On that young, boyish face, there appeared an expression of fervent obsession — familiar from memory.
Ling Jingshu felt a wave of shock crash through her heart.
No — this was not the twelve-year-old Lu Qian she knew!
This was clearly the same twisted young boy from her previous life — the one who harbored a deranged infatuation with his sister-in-law!
How could this be?
Where had things gone wrong?!
Lu Qian’s emotions surged beyond control, and he stepped toward her: “Cousin-sister Shu…”
“Lu Qian, stop right there!” Ling Jingshu’s mind was in complete turmoil; her voice sharpened involuntarily: “Do not come any closer.”
Lu Qian, to his credit, stopped in his tracks. The burning urgency in his eyes could no longer be concealed: “Don’t be afraid. What happened in our previous life will not happen again — I will protect you. No one will dare bully you or hurt you again. I have already obtained my father’s and mother’s consent for our match. Once we are betrothed, in a few years I will take you as my bride. Elder Brother will go to the capital and become Princess Changping’s Prince Consort. He will never return to Jizhou. I will remain here, and stay by your side forever…”
Ling Jingshu at last came back to her senses from the shock: “Enough! Stop talking. Let me have a moment of quiet first.”
Lu Qian finally fell silent, looking at her with an expression full of anticipation and joy.
Ling Jingshu drew a deep breath, steadied her wildly beating heart, and felt her mind clear once more.
So it turned out she was not the only one who had been reborn — Lu Qian, against all expectation, had returned from a past life just as she had. During all these recent days, Lu Qian had concealed it so perfectly that she had not noticed a single clue. She had truly been far too careless and inattentive…
But this was not the moment to dwell on such things. The most important matter right now was to first deal with this enormous catastrophe before her eyes.
Ling Jingshu steadied herself and looked directly at Lu Qian, asking plainly: “You were also reborn?”
Lu Qian answered without hesitation: “Yes.”
An answer she had already anticipated. A tangle of mixed feelings rose in Ling Jingshu’s heart — she could not have said what exactly she felt — and almost instinctively she asked: “When did you die?”
In those days, she had been condemned to death by an imperial secret decree. Because she refused to take her own life, the Ling woman had personally strangled her. At that time, though Lu Qian had frequently fallen ill, his life had not been in danger.
Lu Qian recalled that agonizing, madness-inducing memory; a trace of bitterness surfaced in his expression, and he answered quietly: “After you died, I no longer wished to live. I took my own life while the servants were not paying attention. What I did not expect was that the moment I opened my eyes, I had been reborn. It was just over half a month ago — I woke up on a boat.”
Ling Jingshu said nothing.
Counting the days, Lu Qian had been reborn at nearly the same time as she had.
“A’Shu, I am sorry. I was useless — I could not save you back then.” Lu Qian switched to a more intimate form of address; his eyes were filled with deep feeling: “The two of us were reborn together — this must be heaven’s grace and design. Rest assured, I will protect you from now on, and will never again allow you to suffer the slightest grievance.”
That boyish, immature face, paired with the intense and frantic ardor of his expression — it was a deeply strange sight, even a frightening one.
That face was one of the culprits responsible for the nightmare of her previous life. Had it not been for his one-sided obsessive devotion, had it not been for the unmasked ardor he had displayed, the Ling woman would never have come to hate her to the bone and used such vile and treacherous means to come after her…
On what grounds did he assume she would still be willing to marry him? That she would willingly throw herself back into the Lu Family’s fire pit?
“Lu Qian, I will not marry you.” Ling Jingshu spoke each word with deliberate clarity: “I have never liked you — not in my previous life, and not in this one.”
Lu Qian was refused with such brisk decisiveness, yet he did not retreat: “Feelings can be cultivated slowly. I will not be faithless and heartless like Lu Hong — I will be fully devoted to you for an entire lifetime.”
“These are nothing but your own one-sided wishful thinking.” Ling Jingshu reined in every trace of emotion, her expression cold and indifferent: “But I am unwilling.”
“Lu Qian, in your previous life you clung to me without cease, and you deserve no small share of the credit for the state I ended up in. If not for you, your own birth mother would not have hated me as she did. Even if Lu An had harbored ill intentions, he would not have dared to humiliate me so brazenly and without restraint.”
“In this life, it is impossible that I will ever develop even the slightest feeling for you, and even less will I marry into the Lu Family. You would do well to abandon this notion at the earliest opportunity.”
The phrase “deserve no small share of the credit” cut deeply into Lu Qian’s vulnerable chest. Pain and self-reproach surfaced in his eyes: “A’Shu, I am sorry. I never intended to drag you down. I did not anticipate that my mother would lay such vicious hands on you…”
He had also never anticipated that his father, Lu An, blinded by carnal desire, would commit such a bestial act.
Remorse and guilt haunted him day and night, torturing him until life was worse than death. Yet he had lacked the courage to save her, and lacked the courage to defy Lu An and the Ling woman. He could only abandon himself to self-destruction and torment his own body. Already frail and sickly to begin with, one illness followed after another, and within a few short years his constitution had been utterly ruined.
The day the secret imperial decree arrived at the Lu household, the Ling woman had deliberately concealed the news and quietly executed Ling Jingshu. When he heard the devastating report, he was grief-stricken and utterly shattered. The Ling woman, fearing he might do something rash, kept watch over him every single day. After some time had passed, she relaxed her vigilance somewhat — though even then, servants attended him at all hours.
He endured it for months, waiting until those around him had grown careless, before he finally found his opportunity and drowned himself.
In the final moment before death, he felt no pain — only relief and release.
Perhaps heaven had heard the prayer he whispered before dying, and had granted him his heart’s deepest wish. When he awoke on the boat and realized he had been reborn, he wept in overwhelming emotion. In his heart he swore a silent vow: in this life, he would encounter Ling Jingshu one step ahead of Lu Hong. He would take her as his wife, and cherish and care for her for an entire lifetime.