Lin Jin Lou gritted his teeth and said, “Feeling unwell from drinking too much? Serves you right!” He stood up and was about to leave, but after taking two steps, he heard Xiang Lan retching into the spittoon. Unable to resist, he turned back to check on her. He called out to Ling Su and others standing at the door, “Quick, bring some emetic soup! Shu Ran! Find out where Doctor Zhang is and get him here! Now!” The maids acknowledged and gathered around. Lin Jin Lou sat down in a chair fuming, occasionally getting up to check on Xiang Lan before sitting back down, his face as black as the bottom of a pot.
After vomiting several times, Xiang Lan felt somewhat better, and her mind cleared, though her head was still splitting. After rinsing her mouth and changing into fresh clothes, she simply tied her hair in a simple bun. Soon, Doctor Zhang arrived, panting heavily. After examining her, he told Lin Jin Lou, “Your Concubine has had too much to drink. I’ll prescribe some medicine for two or three days, and she should stick to light meals during this time.” Seeing Lin Jin Lou’s fierce expression, he added with a placating smile, “From her pulse, I can tell that her health has improved from before. I’ll change her prescription, and perhaps in two or three months, there might be good news. General Lin need not worry.”
Hearing this, Lin Jin Lou’s expression softened slightly. He rewarded Doctor Zhang with a generous red envelope and saw him out before returning. He found the maids had lifted the curtains, and Xiang Lan was half-reclining against the headboard, looking dazed. Lin Jin Lou went over to check her complexion – her face was deathly pale, her eyes red and swollen. He asked, “Feeling better? Sobered up?”
Xiang Lan looked at him once but remained silent. Her head was fuzzy, and she couldn’t stop feeling nauseous. Now that the effects of alcohol had worn off, facing the harsh reality of her life with a clear mind made her heart sink even deeper. Old Master Lin lived far away in Jin Ling, Lin Zhang Zheng was posted in Shan Xi, and Madam Qin couldn’t control Lin Jin Lou’s affairs. In the entire Lin household, only Lin Jin Lou’s word counted. Jiang Hui Yun appeared sweet and naive but was shrewd and formidable. She felt deeply trapped in this mansion, with her powerless parents to consider – truly at a dead end with no way to retreat. Thinking of her sister made Xiang Lan even more heartbroken. Jia Lian had always been more quick-witted than her since childhood, yet who could have predicted she would die so tragically? Xiang Lan wondered if she were in the same situation, she would probably have gritted her teeth and continued to endure. She had endured so much these past few years that she could no longer feel the taste of grievance. Worried and desperate, with a bleak future ahead, she struggled forward through the mire, and each retreat met with an even larger wave crashing down. She was terrified – afraid of ending up like her sister, and more afraid that these days would never end. She heaved a long sigh and turned to look at the orchids on the Hai Tang table.
After a long silence, Lin Jin Lou exhaled and said, “You rest. I’ll have a maid tell Madam that you’ll see her tomorrow.” He then got up to leave.
The room fell silent. Xiang Lan closed her eyes and lay against the pillow for a while. Then she heard footsteps – Lin Jin Lou had returned. He felt her forehead, and Xiang Lan opened her eyes slightly. Lin Jin Lou was sitting by the bed. Outside, the rain hadn’t stopped, and a lamp burned in the room, its candlelight illuminating his handsome features.
Lin Jin Lou stroked her face again, tucking stray hairs behind her ear, and asked softly, “Does your head still hurt? Feel like throwing up? Want some water?”
If Lin Jin Lou had been angry with her, she might have felt better, but his gentle words somehow made Xiang Lan’s tears flow again. Lin Jin Lou wiped her tears, saying quietly, “Keep crying and you’ll go blind.”
Xiang Lan covered her face, choking with sobs. Lin Jin Lou held her up, patting her back. She buried her face in his shoulder, crying uncontrollably. He stroked her back and whispered in her ear, “I know you were wronged at the poetry society today. I understand, but no matter how upset you are, you shouldn’t drink yourself drunk. You can’t hold your liquor – aren’t you just hurting yourself? I try to save face for you out there, how can you turn around and lose face yourself? Besides, Old Yuan is an outsider – you shouldn’t meet with him privately. Even with Young Master De and the maids present, people will still gossip if they find out.” Hearing her crying subside, he pulled her away and couldn’t help asking, “What did you talk about with Old Yuan anyway?”
Xiang Lan kept her head down, wiping tears with her sleeve, and said quietly, “I asked about Young Master De’s mother’s death. How tragic she was… I fear… I might end up like her someday.”
Lin Jin Lou frowned, “Like what?”
“She was driven to death by the Marquis and his primary wife.” Xiang Lan raised her head, her deep pool-like eyes fixed steadily on Lin Jin Lou, her expression extremely calm, though her eyes carried an indescribably desolate and bewildered look.
Lin Jin Lou’s chest tightened as he looked at Xiang Lan, his expression gradually turning cold.
Xiang Lan felt unwell but had recklessly thrown out these words. Now she felt somewhat regretful, yet there was an inexplicable satisfaction. She dared not look at Lin Jin Lou’s expression anymore and just closed her eyes, leaning against the bedpost.
Just then, Chun Ling announced from the doorway, “Master, Madam has arrived.”
Xiang Lan kept her eyes closed, knowing that Lin Jin Lou sat for a while before finally getting up to leave. She let out a long breath, cried again, and with her head still pounding like needles, she couldn’t fight it anymore and collapsed onto the bed with a groan.
Lin Jin Lou left the bedroom to find Madam Qin sitting in the hall drinking tea, and he took the chair beside her. Madam Qin scrutinized him up and down, noting his gloomy face, and asked, “What’s wrong? Who are you making that face for?”
Lin Jin Lou picked up a small Cheng Yao five-colored lidded cup, and while drinking tea, nodded perfunctorily, “Nothing, just tired from entertaining guests.”
Seeing her eldest son’s weary expression, Madam Qin couldn’t help but feel concerned: “You just returned from accompanying the Emperor, take a few days to rest properly. There’s no need to see unnecessary relatives and friends. Don’t wear yourself out. Besides, the Jiang family’s eldest son set out for the capital half a month ago and should arrive in these days. I fear you won’t get any rest when they come.”
Lin Jin Lou’s mind was preoccupied with Xiang Lan’s matters, and hearing his mother mention the Jiang family made him even more impatient. He waved his hand, “All right, all right, I know.”
Madam Qin slammed her tea cup on the table with a “bang” and said angrily, “Who do you think you’re talking to? Now you’re getting annoyed? I don’t care how many concubines you take or who you favor, but the Jiang family was chosen by the Old Master and your father. Since we’re to be in-laws, we should give them a face! You’ve repeatedly elevated Chen Xiang Lan – how can the Jiang family not be angry? The Jiang family’s Old Madam is now bedridden with anger. What if something serious happens to her? I still have to mediate and smooth things over for you. Is this how you show filial piety to your parents?”
Lin Jin Lou frowned and said, “If the Jiang family isn’t happy, then let’s not proceed with this marriage.”
Madam Qin raised her willow-leaf eyebrows and exclaimed, “What kind of talk is that!”
Seeing Lin Jin Lou frowning with a troubled expression, she knew her eldest son’s violent temper and realized that her harsh words wouldn’t work. She suppressed her anger and said, “My fate is too bitter. I can’t count on your father, your younger brother is still childish, and my eldest keeps causing trouble and angering me. You even dare to show me attitude when I say something you don’t like. How pitiful is my fate… Other people my age have grandchildren around their knees and daughters-in-law managing the household and showing filial piety. But at my age, I still have to manage this and that, with no one giving me peace of mind…” Her eyes reddened as she raised her handkerchief to wipe tears.
Seeing his mother cry, Lin Jin Lou quickly suppressed his irritation and forced a smile, “Good Mother, my dear Mother, forgive me this once. I’m really tired today and had too much to drink. My head is still fuzzy – I don’t even know what nonsense I was spouting. Please be magnanimous and don’t take offense. Besides, I’m your son – you shouldn’t be angry with me of all people, right?”
Madam Qin had been dwelling on her worries, but hearing Lin Jin Lou speak this way, her resentment dissipated. She looked up and spat on the ground, “You know you’re my own son yet you still anger me.”
Lin Jin Lou said, “No, I didn’t mean to anger you.” He moved forward and took the handkerchief from Madam Qin’s hand to wipe her tears.
Madam Qin snatched back the handkerchief and glared at her eldest son, dabbing her eyes before saying, “Why is your head fuzzy? If you’re unwell, quickly drink a bowl of osmanthus sobering soup. Come here, let Mother look at you. You’ve been away all this time – you must have suffered. With your grandfather and father not in the capital, you’re the pillar of the family. If something happens to you, who can we rely on?”
Lin Jin Lou let Madam Qin hold his hand and examine him up and down several times. She said worriedly, “You’ve indeed lost weight.”
Lin Jin Lou rolled his eyes, “Mother, are you seeing things? I’ve always been like this, I haven’t lost any weight.”
“Who says so? You can’t eat or sleep well in the Emperor’s presence, always on edge – how could you be comfortable?” Madam Qin sighed, “It’s because you don’t have a proper person taking care of you in your quarters. No matter how good Chen Xiang Lan is, she’s not a legitimate wife. Listen to mother’s words – there’s a saying, ‘One generation without a good wife, ten generations without good children.’ Your previous wife was a wrong choice, now we can’t let you act recklessly again! Given how much you favor Chen Xiang Lan, only a docile wife would tolerate it, but with such a timid nature, how can you take her out in public? How can she manage such a large household? She’ll only bring shame to the family and cause me worry. Though Jiang Hui Yun has some faults, she’s still outstanding among young ladies. There’s no perfect thing in this world that shines from all angles. After all the selection, she’s still better than other young ladies. Your father’s recent letter also mentioned that although the Jiang family has been reprimanded, the Emperor only punished Jiang Xue Cheng with one year’s salary and demoted him one rank, showing that they still retain imperial favor, especially with their capable eldest son. You understand these advantages better than I do.”
The conversation had turned back to this topic, and Lin Jin Lou frowned again. Madam Qin paused before continuing, “Mother knows Chen Xiang Lan is your beloved, and this girl is indeed lovable. With me here, she won’t be wronged. When spring comes, we’ll choose an auspicious day to properly bring her in. I’ll personally arrange the celebration. However, given her status… Before, when you had no wife, it was fine, but now that we’re about to discuss marriage with the Jiang family, it’s not appropriate to let her stay in the main chamber anymore. I’ve already promised the Jiang family that she’ll move out within half a day.”
Lin Jin Lou immediately said displeased, “How could you promise the Jiang family this without discussing it with me?”
Madam Qin angrily said, “This is obvious, what is there to discuss? Now we must take a step back to make the Jiang family comfortable.”
Lin Jin Lou said sternly, “No, she can’t move.”
“Why not? Do you plan to keep her enshrined in the main chamber forever?” Madam Qin grew increasingly angry, walking two steps toward Lin Jin Lou and gritting her teeth, “Or do you want to favor a concubine over the main wife and anger me to death?”
“It’s not like that… she just can’t move… I won’t allow it.” If Xiang Lan were moved out of the main chamber now, all his previous efforts to elevate her would become a joke. Lin Jin Lou stood up to leave – he couldn’t bear to sit there anymore. Before his eyes floated Xiang Lan’s pale, delicate face, her calm but world-weary expression, her eyes slightly glistening with tears, completely helpless, saying to him, “I fear… I might end up like her someday.”
Madam Qin shouted angrily, “Stop right there!” She had been strong-willed all her life, even Lin Zhang Zheng gave way to her sometimes, yet she couldn’t control her eldest son. She was so angry she choked up, “I… what sin did I commit in my previous life…”
Lin Jin Lou was full of worries, but seeing Madam Qin getting angry again, he had to return and say, “Don’t worry about this matter…”
“How can I not worry? Since childhood, you’ve always suffered in this regard. Apart from your grandfather, no one can control you? Am I not your birth mother?”
“Yes, yes, no one said you weren’t.” Lin Jin Lou moved forward to massage Madam Qin’s shoulders. “I have my judgment in this matter. If something goes wrong, let Grandfather beat me. If he wants to beat me to death with his cane, you don’t need to stop him.”
“Pah! Nonsense!”
“All right, don’t worry about matters in my chamber. Even if she moves out, it won’t be in these couple of days… Tomorrow I’ll invite a theater troupe to perform two plays to lighten the mood.”
By the time Lin Jin Lou had pacified Madam Qin and seen her off, it was already lamp-lighting time. To please his mother, he had forced himself to listen to her gossip about various relatives and occasional scolding of him, even accompanied her in looking at embroidery patterns and discussing which ones looked good. It was more exhausting than military campaigns. He dragged himself back to his bedroom where Xiang Lan was still sleeping soundly, covered with a thin diamond-patterned silk quilt, her brows slightly furrowed, lips slightly pouting, cheeks rosy, looking as innocent and vulnerable as a child. Lin Jin Lou’s expression gradually softened. He gently touched Xiang Lan’s lips and sat by the bed, watching her silently for a long while before letting out a long sigh.
After returning to her quarters, Madam Qin ordered her maids to bring brush, ink, paper, and inkstone. She first wrote a long letter to Lin Zhang Zheng, then carefully composed another to Lin Zhao Xiang. She read both letters thoroughly, made fresh copies, dried the ink, sealed them with wax, and called in Mother Wu, saying, “These two letters – one for the Old Master and one for the Master – have your two sons deliver them personally, and make sure they’re handled properly.” Mother Wu agreed, but couldn’t help asking, “Madam, this is…”
Madam Qin sighed and said, “It’s still about that troublesome Lou’er. I can’t control his reckless behavior, so I’m reporting this to the Old Master and Master to let them decide.” Seeing a bowl of lotus root soup with taro balls on the table, she ordered some to be sent to Dream Fragrance Court. Remembering that Lin Jin Lou had mentioned Xiang Lan drinking too much and feeling unwell, she hesitated for a moment before finally sending a bowl to Xiang Lan as well, without further comment.
In the main hall of Dream Fragrance Court, behind the wooden screen carved with the Seven Treasures of Buddhism, Ruo Qing spoke softly, “…That’s what Chun Ling said. The Lin family’s Madam wanted Xiang Lan to move out of the main chamber, but Master Lin refused. Miss, what do you think about this… should we continue to endure this situation?”
Jiang Hui Yun just stared blankly at the flickering candlelight on the table. Seeing her pale complexion, Ruo Qing dared not say more and quietly stood aside.