Dowager Consort Zhuang resided in a scenic mountain retreat north of the city. Before dawn this day, Shu Shenhui set out on horseback and arrived at midday. The mountains were tranquil and empty. He followed stone steps beneath the forest upward, arriving before the mountain-built palace complex. Within the gate walls, palace halls and roof corners were faintly visible through verdant trees, with pleasing bird songs. Nearby stood a nunnery with morning bells and evening drums – the dowager consort’s longtime residence for peaceful recuperation these years.

Guards opened the gate for him. He entered and came to the southern quarters where his mother resided, instructing Liu Xiang and others to wait outside while he walked alone along the path, through a small courtyard planted with sparse wintersweet, stopping at the steps before the building.

Someone had already sent word of his arrival inside. Unexpectedly, the steward eunuch who had previously accompanied his mother to the temporary palace emerged, first respectfully bowing to him, then repeating his mother’s words: “Your sentiment is acknowledged. Return.”

Shu Shenhui was startled, glancing toward the doorway. Having delivered the message, the eunuch knew he would certainly question this, and without waiting for him to speak, hurried down to wait beside him in attendance. Indeed, he heard him ask: “My mother consort had no other words?”

The eunuch bowed: “Indeed not. The dowager consort said only this.”

“Is she busy with affairs?”

The eunuch bowed again: “Your Highness, this servant does not know. The dowager consort is inside – it was Nanny Zhuang who conveyed the message.”

Shu Shenhui frowned slightly, standing on the steps for a moment. “Convey another message for me—”

He paused. “Your son departs on this journey, not knowing when next he might express filial gratitude. Your son is extremely reluctant to leave. Please, may my mother spare time from her busy schedule to grant an audience.”

The eunuch acknowledged and hurried back inside.

Shu Shenhui waited alone in the courtyard. After a moment, the eunuch emerged again hastily. Seeing his troubled expression, Shu Shenhui knew the result. Indeed, the eunuch approached, bowed, then stammered: “The dowager consort says, not to delay Your Highness’s affairs, and bids Your Highness… return on your own…”

Shu Shenhui fell silent, standing in place for another moment without speaking. Suddenly, he lifted the hem of his robes and, facing the door leading inside, dropped to his knees on the blue brick pavement.

The eunuch was shocked: “Your Highness—” He reached to help him but hesitated, withdrew his hand, and went back inside again.

The eunuch’s figure disappeared behind the door and did not emerge again. Only Shu Shenhui remained in the courtyard.

The sun’s shadow gradually moved. All was silent around him. The kneeling shadow on the ground slowly moved from the brick path on his right side beneath his knees, then slowly reached his left side, extending outward.

Past noon, the sun slanted west. Evening approached, and several evening bell sounds came from next door. He had been kneeling for nearly three hours.

The courtyard steps had no tree shade. At first under the blazing sun, his forehead was covered with sweat, his clothes soaked through, clinging tightly to his back. Gradually the sweat dried, sticking his clothes to him. He kept his dry lips tightly closed, motionless, always kneeling, gazing at the door ahead.

Lady Zhuang had secretly paced back and forth countless times. On the final trip, she emerged into the dark area behind the door, glanced once more at the kneeling shadow in the setting sun, her heart aching terribly. She hurried back before Dowager Consort Zhuang’s quarters, knelt outside the door, and pleaded: “Dowager Consort! His Highness has been kneeling half the day! He hasn’t had a drop of water! If the dowager consort doesn’t see him, he won’t rise. Doesn’t the dowager consort know His Highness’s temperament? He’ll keep kneeling – how can his body endure it? His Highness has labored for state affairs these years, exhausting his mind and energy – it hasn’t been easy. When he returns this time, it will be the same again. This servant begs the dowager consort to let him in…”

As she spoke, her eyes reddened and her voice became choked.

After another moment of silence inside, finally, a voice said: “Let him in.”

Lady Zhuang quickly kowtowed in thanks, got up, wiped her eyes, and hurried out.

Shu Shenhui knelt steadily on the blue brick path in the setting sun, his knees bearing all the pressure from his body. His knees had progressed from initial pain to needle-like stabbing, then numbness, and by now seemed no longer his own.

The door opened again. He saw Lady Zhuang hurry out, step down from the platform, and come to his side.

“Your Highness, please rise! The dowager consort summons Your Highness inside!”

Shu Shenhui’s shoulders moved slightly as he slowly rose from the ground.

Having knelt too long, when first standing he couldn’t maintain balance. Lady Zhuang hastily reached out, supporting him with one hand while loudly calling for others to help.

Liu Xiang had been waiting outside the courtyard. Half the day had passed. Through the crack of the partially closed door, he had long seen the Regent Prince’s kneeling figure on the courtyard steps. How dare he enter? He pretended not to know, pacing outside anxiously. Finally, someone emerged from inside. Seeing the situation, his heart jumped, about to rush in when several eunuchs and palace maids had already hurried out from behind the door – some supporting, some massaging his knees.

Liu Xiang stopped and withdrew.

Shu Shenhui closed his eyes, stood for a moment until the numbness in his legs gradually disappeared, then nodded to Lady Zhuang, freed himself from support, and walked up the steps inside.

Lady Zhuang followed closely, guiding his way, taking a tea cup from an approaching elderly palace maid to let him drink first. Shu Shenhui didn’t take it, walking straight inside.

The door was open. Golden sunset light slanted in through the west window. Dowager Consort Zhuang sat on a low couch. Shu Shenhui walked before her, knelt again, respectfully kowtowed, and said softly: “Your son is unfilial. It is your son’s fault for angering his mother again. Please, mother, forgive.”

Dowager Consort Zhuang glanced at him and said lightly, “What fault do you have?”

Shu Shenhui slowly raised his head, meeting his mother’s gaze from her seat.

He naturally understood why his mother wouldn’t see him. After she left that day, he and Jiang Hanyuan remained. Whatever happened between them afterward, even if she couldn’t know everything, she should have heard something.

She was punishing him for Jiang Hanyuan’s sake.

From that night of their complete break in the storm until now, over these months, he appeared the same as usual on the surface – busy yet orderly in handling every matter he should as Great Wei’s regent. However, his heart was extremely oppressed, with one string always tightly stretched. But he felt he could completely control this string. Until that day when Jiang Zuowang’s memorial arrived, that string suddenly snapped.

It was all that he deserved; he was willing to bear it.

This suffering and pain inflicted on his body somehow seemed to match his feelings, able to bring some release to his heart.

Yet at this moment, when he heard his mother ask where his fault lay, his heart became confused, not knowing where to begin.

After that rainy night, he was angry and disappointed, or perhaps there was also some helplessness and resentment he would never admit. But all these emotions became unimportant from the moment he received Jiang Zuowang’s memorial – only regret and worry remained in his heart. He regretted that he shouldn’t have lost his mind that night to test her. Knowing there wouldn’t be a satisfactory result, he still did it.

If he had restrained himself that night, pretending nothing happened and directly telling her about the monk’s suspicious identity, then now, even separated by mountains and passes, at least she would still be his…

He should have adhered to his original thoughts when marrying her. Then he had set up the bridal chamber in Fanzhi Courtyard precisely to preserve a final place where he could be alone. If circumstances always permitted and she had no objections, they would live together harmoniously like respectful spouses.

Now things had become this way. If forced to name a fault, it was that he hadn’t restrained himself from testing her that night; it was that he was bewitched by her; it was that he cared too much about her, hoping she would like him more than now, that like him, her heart would hold him – only him alone – rather than sharing bed and pillow with him while dreaming of someone else.

Yet at this moment, he couldn’t complain to his mother about her wrongs, those torments she inflicted on him. She married him yet dreamed of another; when he dealt with that person, she reacted violently, even kneeling and cutting her hair.

What right did he have to demand this of her? Just because he originally married her for Great Wei’s sake?

He slowly closed his lips again, suddenly feeling his palm throbbing with pain again, severe pain almost unbearable.

Seeing him only kneeling silently with a stubborn appearance, Dowager Consort Zhuang grew more annoyed. Looking again, she saw his pale face as if unwell. Thinking he had knelt in the blazing sun for half the day – could it be heatstroke? Both helpless and heartbroken, she called him to rise, but he didn’t respond. The dowager consort grew more nervous, forgetting her anger, quickly rising to call Lady Zhuang, pulling her son up, making him sit, and giving him water. The dowager consort personally wrung a cloth with warm water, sat beside him, wanting to wipe his face.

Shu Shenhui turned away, avoiding the dowager consort’s extended hand, taking it himself to wipe the sweat from his face, saying softly: “I’m fine. Mother needn’t worry.”

The dowager consort withdrew her hand, stared at him for a while, then asked: “Xixí returned safely to Yanmen, didn’t she? Any recent news of her?”

Shu Shenhui paused. “She returned—” His gaze fell toward the setting sun outside the window and stopped.

The dowager consort sighed softly.

“I won’t ask why you two argued again when things were fine. Even if I asked, you wouldn’t tell me.”

She looked at her silent son.

“Don’t blame me for being partial either. I don’t know other things and shouldn’t speak carelessly, but I heard that day you didn’t wait for the rain to stop or dawn, but left her behind to leave alone. Treating her this way is your great wrong!”

“No matter why you argued that night, when you originally married her, you never asked if she was willing. Even with ten thousand unwillingnesses in her heart, she still had to marry into Chang’an. You got your wish. Now, regardless of any dissatisfaction with her, when angry with her, I hope you think more about why she married you!”

“I said everything I should say last time at the temporary palace. I still say: Xixí is a good child. If you treat her well, she won’t betray you.”

Shu Shenhui’s gaze slowly returned from outside the window to his mother, showing a smile, nodding: “This time I truly remember. It is indeed my fault. I will apologize to Xixí. Please mother be at ease!”

The dowager consort shook her head and sighed inwardly.

He was kept by the dowager consort for dinner. Before the lamps were lit, he reluctantly bid farewell and left. The dowager consort saw him to the door, standing on the steps watching her son’s departing figure.

Even after His Highness’s figure disappeared, the dowager consort still stood there, reluctant to turn and go inside for a long time.

Lady Zhuang quietly accompanied her when suddenly she heard the dowager consort say softly, “I roughly know Xixí’s feelings when she entered Chang’an that day. So I feel even more for her. But I truly have selfish motives too – for my son’s sake, I hope Xixí can—”

She paused, her gaze falling toward the northwestern sky. There now was a brilliant sunset afterglow. Beneath that afterglow lay a distant, invisible imperial city.

“…no matter what the future holds, if Xixí can accompany him through thick and thin, never leaving, then I can truly be at peace…”

Lady Zhuang supported her, saying gently, “His Highness and the female general are a perfect match, both wise people. Even with conflicts, they’ll understand quickly themselves. The dowager consort need not worry. When His Highness brings the female general again next time, it will surely be a different scene.”

Dowager Consort Zhuang was silent for another moment, then smiled and nodded: “You speak truly. I shall wait for that.”

Shu Shenhui emerged. Liu Xiang accompanied him down the mountain. Seeing his smile gone and melancholy between his brows, he dared not speak much, only following the others. When the group rode back to the city, reaching the foothills below the temporary palace, it was already deep night.

“We depart tomorrow morning. You all go rest. I’m a bit warm – I’ll stay here to catch some breeze before going up. You needn’t mind me.”

Shu Shenhui suddenly said, dismounting and tossing the reins to an attendant, walking toward the lakeside alone.

Liu Xiang saw him standing by the lake, head slightly lowered, eyes fixed on the water’s surface, not knowing what he was thinking. The lake water was dark and rather eerie-looking. How dare he obey? He dismissed his subordinates while remaining himself, not daring to get too close, standing only a dozen steps away.

The Regent Prince raised his head again, gazing at the northern night sky, his silhouette frozen like a statue.

Liu Xiang waited, sometimes thinking of today when the Regent Prince was refused audience by the dowager consort and knelt half the day, sometimes thinking of that night when he emerged holding his bloody sword-cut hand with that rigid expression.

Though even now he still hadn’t completely understood what happened, it was obvious the Regent Prince and Princess had had serious conflict. All this stemmed from that night when he told the Regent Prince about the monk Wu Sheng.

Liu Xiang suppressed his guilt, glanced at the sky, stepped forward, and said: “Your Highness, it’s late. Please, Your Highness, go rest.”

The Regent Prince still didn’t move. Just as Liu Xiang felt helpless, he suddenly heard him speak: “You were formerly under Jiang Zuowang too. I heard the Princess grew up in military camps as a child – did you see her then?”

He didn’t turn around.

Liu Xiang was startled, quickly understanding, and stepped forward: “Your Highness, this subject indeed saw her. The Princess was very small – I remember only six or seven years old when she came to the military camp.”

Seeing the Regent Prince seem startled, slowly turning to look at him: “So young?”

Liu Xiang nodded: “Yes.”

After a moment of silence, he asked again: “What was she like as a child?”

Liu Xiang said, “The Princess didn’t like talking even as a child. When she first came, she was a delicate little girl, but despite her young age, she insisted on training with foot soldiers. At first, no one took it seriously, thinking it was just a temporary interest. Unexpectedly, she rose before dawn, returned to camp at dark, day after day, regardless of weather. This subject has never seen such determined character, especially in a little girl. To be honest with Your Highness, the Princess was in this subject’s foot soldier camp then. Her arms and legs were often bruised from falls and training. Sometimes this subject felt pity, but she didn’t care at all. Later, this subject entered Chang’an and had no more contact with Yanmen. Years later, when this subject heard news of the Princess again, it was the year she led forces to retake Qingmu Plain.”

After speaking, he saw the Regent Prince slowly turn back, gazing at the lake water at his feet. After a long while, he said softly: “So you and she have such a history together…”

His voice faded.

Liu Xiang looked at his melancholy silhouette, hesitated long, then said: “Your Highness, this subject dares speak presumptuously – I don’t know if it’s appropriate.”

“Speak.” His gaze remained on the lake.

“After Your Highness left that day, this subject escorted the Princess. The Princess is magnanimous. Even across great distances, Your Highness could write to her. Whatever the matter, the Princess should not hold grudges. Moreover, the Princess should have married into the palace out of admiration for Your Highness originally.”

Shu Shenhui turned: “What do you mean? How do you know she admired me?”

Liu Xiang was truly troubled by guilt, hoping for their reconciliation so he wouldn’t become a sinner. He couldn’t restrain himself from saying such words. Hearing this question now, he realized his slip, his heart jumping as he hastily retreated several steps, bowing: “This subject was wildly guessing. Your Highness has such a distinguished bearing – how could the Princess not be charmed?”

Shu Shenhui slowly turned, hands behind his back, staring at Liu Xiang for a long while: “Do you have matters concerning her? How dare you conceal from me!”