The hand holding the little dog loosened on one side. Jing Jing saw its owner had awakened and decisively broke free from her embrace.
Lin Shilan got up from the sofa, wanting to chase the dog but not daring to make too much noise, tiptoeing and running behind it.
Limping Jing Jing saw that Tan Jin’s room door wasn’t closed tightly, leaving a crack. The little head probed forward, and the door was easily pushed open by it. The little dog nimbly drilled inside.
“Hm?” Tan Jin wasn’t playing games and immediately discovered Jing Jing.
Knowing it was already too late to call the dog back, Lin Shilan scratched her neck and sighed helplessly.
Even more speechless matters were yet to come…
“Jing Jing, you can’t pee here. This is my territory, not yours.”
Something terrible seemed to have happened in the room.
Lin Shilan finally knew the reason why Jing Jing had run off in such a hurry.
Having finished its business, the little earth dog lowered its raised hind leg and left its toilet, going back to find its owner.
Hearing the little dog running over, Lin Shilan tumbled and scrambled toward the sofa. Before Tan Jin appeared, she covered herself back up with the blanket.
“…”
Afraid Jing Jing would wake Lin Shilan, Tan Jin made a flying leap to catch it. Just as he was about to carry it back to his room, he discovered that Lin Shilan’s lying position on the sofa was different from before.
“…”
He tentatively asked in a volume like a mosquito’s buzz: “Do you want to eat fruit?”
The other side replied: “Okay.”
The air froze.
Neither of them looked at each other, entering the kitchen one in front of the other.
They worked with their heads down, and the fruit platter was completed in no time. The other people were only just beginning the second half of their dinner, so naturally there was no third person to come eat fruit.
“Then we’ll take it away to eat.” Tan Jin said this.
Lin Shilan had thought he would take the fruit to the living room, but unexpectedly, he directly took it back to his bedroom.
He held the door open for her, and she had no choice but to steel herself and go in.
Because of the bad thing Jing Jing had done here, the floor had just been mopped by Tan Jin.
The room emanated a faint lemon scent. Having come to his house so many times, this was Lin Shilan’s first time entering his room.
The layout inside was very simple: a large computer desk, gaming chair, small tea table, bed, with books and a backpack thrown in the corner.
Tan Jin very naturally set down the fruit plate on the small tea table, then sat in the gaming chair.
Lin Shilan blinked. He instantly understood: he had forgotten she had no place to sit.
So Tan Jin flipped back the bedding, preparing to sit there himself.
Seeing a space cleared out, Lin Shilan thought that was the spot for her to sit and immediately shuffled over in small steps. Tan Jin didn’t have time to react before she had already sat on his messy bed.
The bed was too soft, and she sank down as soon as she sat. About to fall backward completely, in the emergency situation, Lin Shilan slowly opened both arms, clenched her fists, and stabilized herself.
“…”
The atmosphere froze so much that even the dog didn’t want to come in.
The two of them silently ate fruit with toothpicks.
Eating with heads down, they accidentally speared the same piece of mango.
They made eye contact, each thinking the other would withdraw their toothpick, so neither let go, and together they lifted the mango up.
“You eat it.” He yielded.
“You eat, you eat.” She also yielded.
“You eat it. Mango has a mango taste, I don’t like eating it.” He released his toothpick.
Lin Shilan didn’t quite understand what he was saying.
But comprehending that meaning, she ate that piece of mango.
She had to find a topic, so she started: “Jing Jing…”
He looked up while chewing mango and responded: “Ah?”
“I mean, the dog.”
She barely maintained this difficult conversation: “The dog Jing Jing, can I leave it with you for now?”
Tan Jin answered instantly: “Okay.”
This topic ended, and Lin Shilan could only find another one.
“My glasses broke today. If you have time, could you accompany me to the glasses shop to get them fixed?”
He answered instantly: “Okay.”
Lin Shilan, with tenacious will, continued her efforts: “I encountered a lot of things today.”
Tan Jin said: “Mm.”
Lin Shilan asked: “Do you want to hear about it?”
Tan Jin answered instantly: “Okay.”
Finally finding an opportunity to explain to him, she breathed a sigh of relief and carefully told him about everything that happened today.
Unexpectedly, after listening, Tan Jin not only didn’t show disappointment in her, he even thought she was very brave today.
“Jing Jing was kicked, and you came out to protect it. The things you did, I don’t even dare say I’d have the courage to do them. Lin Shilan, you’re really cool!”
Regarding his praise, she felt undeserving: “How does that count as having courage? Later, when my mom refused to see a doctor, I didn’t have the courage to forcefully make her go. And if I really had courage, I wouldn’t be asking you to take care of Jing Jing now either.”
“I can understand your reasons for doing that. Your mom is your most important person. Even if you want to resist her and seek yourself, it requires a process. You can’t possibly steel your heart and achieve it in a short time. Human hearts are made of flesh; naturally they’ll hesitate, take wrong turns, waver back and forth. These are all very normal. You’ve already done very well.”
His expression when speaking was very serious, his bright eyes shimmering with a gentle light.
Lin Shilan couldn’t distinguish whether this was Tan Jin’s comfort or his true feelings.
—Whichever it was, it didn’t matter anymore.
Today she had accumulated self-blame, feeling she couldn’t please anyone, fearing he would blame her, yet he didn’t have that intention at all. Instead, he was, as always, supporting her.
Tan Jin’s words made her heart feel warm as she listened.
No one touched the fruit on the table anymore. In this small world with just the two of them, she and he communicated with open hearts.
“My mother couldn’t catch her breath today, and I was especially worried about this. In previous rainy seasons, when I listened to her, she didn’t have episodes. She said her illness was caused by my infuriating behavior, and I really feel guilty. I said what I wanted to say without considering her, causing her old injury to relapse.”
He thought deeply for a moment and said: “Your mom basically tied her illness to whether you’re obedient or not, right? Actually, you can only take care of her within the scope of your capabilities. Her body, in the end, should be her own concern. Like how she decided not to go to the hospital—you wanted her to go, but she still wouldn’t go. Even if later your mom’s body develops more serious conditions because of anger, you shouldn’t take the blame onto yourself. Illness and death are things everyone experiences. It’s not like she’ll never get sick just because you accommodate her. People will all die…”
The words weren’t very pleasant to hear, so Tan Jin stopped and changed his phrasing.
“What I mean is, we’ll also die. The length of life is limited. No one knows what the optimal solution is in the grand scheme. For instance, you’ve already returned to our past for the fourth time, yet you still have no way of knowing what to do to get the best result. You said what you wanted to say—that was ‘what you wanted,’ right? Then I think you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“When we don’t know what results will come after each step, all we can do is be true to our own hearts, complete well what we’re currently doing, and ensure our present selves have no regrets. If, in the future, we discover this choice was terrible and the resulting consequences were serious, then recalling that feeling of ‘being true to ourselves’ at the time, we won’t find it too hard to accept that bad result either.”
The corners of her eyes grew slightly moist. Lin Shilan was encouraged by Tan Jin’s words.
Sometimes he was like an immature minor, and sometimes he became very different.
Lin Shilan had to admit that Tan Jin’s perspective on things was far more expansive than her own.
He had his own way of thinking. Through his words, one could read his resolute heart.
After a round of heart-to-heart conversation, the awkward atmosphere between them finally dissipated.
Only one thing—if Tan Jin didn’t blame her, then Lin Shilan didn’t understand why he had been so angry when entering earlier. This feeling wasn’t too important, so she didn’t dwell on it.
Tan Jin asked her: “Next week’s mock exam, how’s your preparation going?”
Lin Shilan wasn’t very confident: “I’ve been studying, but I can only say I’ll do my best on the test. There were too many exams in senior year, so I remember very little about the second mock exam questions.”
“It’s fine. How you do on the exam and whether you can keep Jing Jing are two different things. It’s strange that your mom ties them together. When the time comes, I’ll accompany you to talk to your mom.”
She nodded.
Looking at the messy pile of books in the corner, Lin Shilan was curious: “You’re not reviewing at all?”
“That’s right!” Tan Jin crossed his legs, reverting to his good-for-nothing loafer state: “Anyway, after staying through one rainy season, I’ll be gone. I’ll eat whatever I want to eat, play whatever I want to play, and do what I want to do.”
The wound on her forehead was a bit itchy, and Lin Shilan reached up to touch it.
His gaze suddenly froze, and only then did she react: Oh no! That’s a forbidden topic! Absolutely can’t mention it!
Staring at the cartoon dog band-aid, Tan Jin’s heart was in complete chaos.
“…When did you wake up?”
He thought: The dog band-aid, the connection was too strong, he couldn’t deny it. Waiting for her to go back and discover it would be even harder to explain. Better to probe now how much she knew.
This band-aid was cursed—the more she scratched, the itchier it got.
Scratching with her fingers, her gaze drifted away: “Probably when you came to the sofa.”
“Oh!” Tan Jin thought how fortunate—she woke up pretty late.
His lips moved, rapidly making up lies: “I came out to drink water and passed by the sofa. I happened to see your band-aid had fallen off, and coincidentally, there was a band-aid on the tea table, so I casually helped you put on a new one.”
“Mm…” She didn’t intend to deceive him: “I mean the first time you came to the sofa.”
A thunderbolt from the blue.
The fake smile on Tan Jin’s face shattered.
It was really unbearably itchy. Lin Shilan coughed lightly and asked him: “Are there any other band-aids at home? I might need to change it.”
His two eyes drooped down, looking at the cartoon dog on her forehead, feeling wronged.
Even if the doggy said the wrong thing, what bad intentions could a doggy have?
Why don’t you like the doggy? Why do you want to change the doggy?
His expression was so pitiful that she guessed what he was thinking wildly about.
“Just this kind, band-aids.”
She pointed at the cute little dog on her forehead and asked: “Do you have more of these?”
“Yes! Yes!” Tan Jin sprang up from his chair.
Band-aids—he pulled open his drawer and magnificently slapped down a large bundle.
Not only cartoon dogs, but also cartoon bears, cartoon sharks, cartoon ducks, cartoon cows…
He casually picked up a pink pig band-aid and was about to help her change it.
Lin Shilan’s “I’ll do it myself” didn’t have time to come out of her mouth at all.
Tan Jin waved the band-aid and rushed toward her.
His bed was very soft.
She was sitting on his bed.
In the panic, losing balance and not wanting to fall onto someone else’s bed.
Lin Shilan grabbed the thing closest to her, which was Tan Jin.
His slippers flew off.
His body fell heavily toward his bed.
In the living room, a melodramatic soap opera was playing. In the drama, after a fall with difficulty comparable to a gymnastics move, the male and female leads’ lips touched lips, sparking love’s flame. Romantic background music played, and the male and female leads remained in their surprised positions for a long time.
Outside the room, the environment was noisy.
Inside the room, quiet and still.
In the midst of the humid and hot rainy season.
The weather was hot, and because of the continuous rain, the air conditioning wasn’t on.
The oscillating fan in the room whirred, blowing away the heat but unable to blow away the stuffiness.
It wasn’t like the heaven-shaking coincidence in soap operas.
But they solidly embraced.
His hands opened wide, completely pressing down on her.
Her hands—calling it pushing was more like resting them on his waist.
Summer clothes were thin, and his body after bathing emanated a clean, fragrant scent.
Sunk in the soft cotton swamp, unable to escape no matter how they dodged… the breath close at hand and each other’s accelerating heartbeats.