What transpired within Cining Palace, Jiang Ruan had no way of knowing. However, matters in this world are mysteriously predestined, and even coincidences can easily collide. What Xiao Shao was contemplating, another person had thought of as well.
At the General’s residence, Gu Yi dismissed the servants and was secretly planning to slip out of the mansion when he had just reached the courtyard gate. Behind him came a familiar voice: “Yi’er, where are you going?”
Gu Yi’s expression fell as he turned around with an awkward smile. Indeed, he saw Madam Gu standing behind him. She walked up to him in a few steps and reproached: “With such chaos outside right now, where are you still thinking of going?”
Gu Yi’s eyes darted around before he had a sudden inspiration: “I… I want to enter the palace to visit my cousin.”
Gu Yi’s cousin was also a talented lady in the palace, and the two cousins had originally been quite close. Since his cousin entered the palace, Gu Yi hadn’t seen her for quite some time.
However, this excuse was rather weak. Madam Gu raised her eyebrows: “Oh? To visit your cousin, or rather to visit Princess Hong’an?”
“Mother—” Gu Yi grew anxious: “I… she and I are friends after all. Now that she’s in an awkward situation, naturally I cannot turn a deaf ear. I just want to show some concern for her.”
Madam Gu looked at him with disappointment: “Show concern for her? This is precisely the time when tensions are highest. Do you not value your life? Even if you don’t value your life, don’t drag the entire household into this. Jiang Xinzhi’s current situation is still unclear. Be careful not to get pulled in yourself. Our household is clean and innocent – we cannot be implicated in these matters for no reason.”
“I just want to comfort her a little. It’s not as complicated as Mother thinks,” Gu Yi said urgently. “Mother, I cannot be the kind of petty person who changes with the wind.”
Madam Gu sighed, looking at her stubborn son, uncertain whether to feel joy or sorrow. Her son had grown up and had his own opinions, but Madam Gu understood Gu Yi’s thoughts all too clearly – wasn’t it all because he was thinking of Jiang Ruan? She had thought it was just a child’s momentary infatuation, but after such a long time he still hadn’t let go. For Gu Yi, this might not necessarily be a good thing.
Seeing that Madam Gu’s expression was softening, Gu Yi’s heart rejoiced. He coaxed her: “Mother, I’ll go with my aunt to bring some things to my cousin. I’ll return very soon.”
Madam Gu said nothing, which meant tacit consent. Gu Yi quickly had the servants prepare horses and turned to leave the courtyard.
A nearby nanny said: “Madam is just letting the young master go like this?”
“Princess Hong’an is a clever person,” Madam Gu said indifferently. “Let him go. It would be good to break his obsession.”
…
At the same time, at the Capital Prefect’s residence.
A maid brought over a small bowl of rock sugar stewed pear. The sugar syrup had been cooked until thick and looked particularly beautiful in the crystal-clear bowl. The maid placed the sweet soup to one side and reached out to help the person curled up on the couch: “Miss, please get up and drink some sweet soup.”
“I don’t want any.” A weak voice came, seemingly still heavy with nasal congestion and tears. The maid felt troubled and gently persuaded: “Miss needn’t worry too much. The matter hasn’t reached a conclusion yet. Perhaps it hasn’t reached the worst point. Why harm your own health?”
The person lying on the couch seemed to be touched by these words at her most painful spot. Her shoulders began to shake, and she became even more heartbroken. After a moment, she slowly sat up, revealing a haggard and pale face – it was Dong Ying’er.
Dong Ying’er wore a honey-colored jacket, her hair simply arranged in a small bun with the rest hanging behind her head in some disarray. Gone was her former ethereal and charming appearance. Though she was of flower-like age, she already bore traces of aging. Her eyes were somewhat swollen from being soaked in tears for a long time, and the hair on both sides of her cheeks was dampened by tears into wet strands, looking pitiful indeed.
She licked her dry lips and asked: “What time is it now?”
Outside the room, Master Dong and Madam Dong were filled with worry. Master Dong set his teacup heavily on the table and sighed deeply.
“Things have come to this point. Ying’er has no other choice,” Madam Dong’s eyes showed unusual determination. “She must not have any connection with that Jiang Xinzhi. With this incident, it would be good if Ying’er could finally let go of her obsession.”
“Madam,” Master Dong shook his head. “Ying’er appears gentle on the surface, but inside she’s extremely stubborn. I fear she might do something foolish.”
“I understand our daughter better than you do,” Madam Dong said. “Better short-term pain than long-term. Heartbreak is better than a lifetime of being obsessed with impossible things. Besides, you know the household’s situation better than anyone. Now we have only this one path to take.” She stood up, as if having made some resolution: “I’ll go in to persuade her.”
Dong Ying’er sat dazedly on the couch, like a lifeless clay doll. When Madam Dong entered the room, she saw this scene and felt a pang in her heart. She waved the maids away and sat down beside the couch, gently calling: “Ying’er.”
After a long while, Dong Ying’er seemed to react. She turned to look at Madam Dong’s face so close to hers. Meeting those loving eyes, her heart was suddenly filled with mixed emotions. After calling out “Mother” once, she could say nothing more and fell into Madam Dong’s arms, crying bitterly.
Who could know that when she heard the news of the urgent situation at the border and Jiang Xinzhi’s defeat and capture, the shock and tremendous pain that swept through her heart? If she weren’t a woman, she would probably wish to fly to the border herself to see what the situation truly was. Thinking of that brilliant, mighty, and handsome man ultimately becoming, like countless soldiers, a handful of yellow earth on the battlefield, Dong Ying’er was overwhelmed with pain.
Pitiful are the bones by the Wuding River, still the beloved in spring boudoir dreams. She had not yet revealed her feelings to him, he still didn’t know her heart, and now they were separated by death forever. All the suffering she had endured for Jiang Xinzhi, being confined in this mansion, had all been in vain! The most sorrowful thing in the world is when something ends before it even has a chance to begin.
Dong Ying’er’s obsession was Jiang Xinzhi. Now that Jiang Xinzhi had met such a fate, how could she not collapse?
Madam Dong held Dong Ying’er in her arms, patting her back lovingly, comforting her as she used to: “This isn’t your fault, only that fate is cruel. Now that Vice General Jiang has met such an end, you must not harm your health. Your father, mother, and brother all care about you. If you hurt yourself, Mother will be heartbroken. Seeing you in pain makes Mother’s heart ache as well.”
“Mother,” Dong Ying’er cried out in anguish, “My heart is so bitter—”
“Mother knows your heart is bitter,” Madam Dong held Dong Ying’er even tighter. “How could Mother’s heart not be bitter too? You only know that Vice General Jiang was defeated, but do you know how increasingly complex the court’s power structure has become? Our household originally maintained neutrality, but with Vice General Jiang’s defeat, some matters have been brought to the surface. Our household has become like chestnuts in the fire – everyone wants to take a grab. Your father and elder brother now can neither advance nor retreat. One wrong move and we lose everything. How is our household not also being roasted in the fire?” She gently stroked Dong Ying’er’s long hair: “If Vice General Jiang truly died on the battlefield, for a military man to die wrapped in horse leather is an honorable death. What’s frightening is dying in confusion without reason. Ah.”
Madam Dong’s voice carried deep weariness and worry. Dong Ying’er raised her head. During these days she had been confined to her room, she had also been cold toward Master Dong and Madam Dong, paying little attention to household affairs. How was it that, without her knowing, the household had already reached such a difficult situation?
She looked at Madam Dong closely. Only now did she notice that what she had failed to observe before – the formerly plump and round Madam Dong had somehow become much thinner, with heavy worry between her brows and a very haggard expression. Dong Ying’er’s heart skipped a beat as she asked: “Mother, what has happened?”
“It has nothing to do with you,” Madam Dong smiled and touched her head. “As long as you’re well, Mother’s heart will be happier than anything.”
But Dong Ying’er didn’t think so. Madam Dong’s words had already pierced deep into her heart. Originally she had been in love with Jiang Xinzhi, but now whether Jiang Xinzhi was captured or killed, it was impossible for them to be together in this lifetime. Now that she had also broken off the engagement with the Chang family, there was no way back. She had originally wanted to end it all, having no will to live, but seeing Madam Dong in such a state, she changed her mind.
In this world, the only ones who could forever stay by her side and treat her with unchanging kindness were her family members. She had previously defied her family for Jiang Xinzhi’s sake. Since she had no other wishes in this life, why not fulfill theirs instead?
She looked at Madam Dong: “Mother, I want to enter the palace.”
“You…” Madam Dong was startled and forced a smile: “You should rest now. After all these incidents, recovering properly is the priority. Don’t think about other things.”
“Mother,” Dong Ying’er smiled gently. In that instant, something seemed to dissipate from her mischievous bright eyes, replaced by a faint coldness: “Since the household is in such difficulty, and brother and father still need to maintain their position in court where one careless step could make them someone else’s scapegoat, if I enter the palace, I can at least gain His Majesty’s protection and earn His Majesty’s trust in the Dong family.” She suddenly stood up, knelt before Madam Dong, and respectfully kowtowed three times: “Daughter has been unfilial. Previously daughter was wrong, abandoning the Dong household for selfish reasons. Please give daughter a chance to make amends and let daughter enter the palace.”
Her tone was resolute, as if she no longer had any attachment to Jiang Xinzhi. Even that trace of grief had instantly vanished, as if she had never been infatuated with a military general named Jiang Xinzhi.
Madam Dong looked at her, uncertain whether to feel joy or sorrow. All her myriad emotions transformed into a long sigh.
That Jiang Xinzhi had ultimately changed Dong Ying’er into a completely different person, rewriting Dong Ying’er’s life. At this moment, her playful and carefree girlhood came to an end. From now on, Dong Ying’er would enter the deep palace, navigating step by step through that cage woven with intrigue and schemes, seeking a temporarily prosperous glory for herself and her family.
Walking out of Dong Ying’er’s room, Master Dong came forward and asked: “Madam, how did it go?”
Madam Dong remained silent, slowly closing her eyes as she stood before the Guanyin statue in the hall. As she pressed her palms together, a tear quickly splashed out and fell into the incense ash burner, disappearing instantly.
I have wronged you. I can only spend the rest of my life atoning for this sin. I only wish for peace and joy in this life, even if that’s just… too much to ask.
…
In the garden outside the princess’s palace, Jiang Ruan looked up at the young man before her.
Gu Yi wore a lake-green brocade robe with large auspicious cloud patterns embroidered on the chest. His dark eyes stared intently at Jiang Ruan, showing some nervousness.
In a trance, it seemed like they had returned to their first meeting on the Linglong boat years ago. The youth had been a pampered son of a wealthy family, like the large peonies in this palace – his life a cluster of flowers, naturally born to be admired.
What had begun as merely superficial exploitation had now become this – times had changed, the boy had grown into a young man, yet his gaze seemed even more sincere than before. The frivolity had diminished somewhat, replaced by more composure, but he was still looking at the same person.
“Master Gu,” Jiang Ruan nodded. She could smile warmly at those with vicious hearts, but faced with this persistent admiration, she could only respond with coldness.
“Miss Jiang,” Gu Yi didn’t call her Princess Hong’an. In Gu Yi’s heart, Jiang Ruan was still like the Miss Ruan of the Jiang family from their first meeting. He had been amazed by her beauty – a fair lady, a gentleman’s desire. Later, when Jiang Ruan followed the Empress Dowager to the imperial mausoleum, she returned in glory three years later. Gu Yi was amazed to discover that she was like a dust-covered precious jade finally unearthed, now polished to perfection, making it even more impossible to look away.
Although he was the son of the General’s household, he still had to be cautious with his words and actions. Jiang Ruan was now the honored Princess Hong’an, and in daily life it was rare to have much contact with her. Moreover, Master Gu had expressly forbidden him from getting too close to Jiang Ruan.
Until the news of Jiang Xinzhi’s defeat arrived, Gu Yi could no longer restrain himself. In his view, the eventual fate of a defeated vice general in court was predictable. Jiang Ruan, being in the palace, was inadvertently pushed to the center of the storm. The longer she stayed in the palace, the more dangerous it became, inevitably becoming implicated because of Jiang Xinzhi.
Gu Yi spoke: “Miss Jiang, regarding your brother’s matter, I hope Miss will take heart.”
“Thank you for Master Gu’s comfort,” Jiang Ruan said indifferently.
Seeing Jiang Ruan’s attitude, Gu Yi felt somewhat uneasy, but thinking of what he was about to say next, he was suddenly filled with courage: “Miss Jiang, now that Vice General Jiang’s fate is unknown, it’s too dangerous for Miss to remain in the palace. The court’s current situation is chaotic, and Miss being Vice General Jiang’s sister might inevitably be implicated because of him. Even the Empress Dowager might have areas she cannot fully protect. I… I have a solution.”
Jiang Ruan raised an eyebrow, her lips curving: “Oh? What solution does Master Gu have?”
Gu Yi’s heart beat faster under her gaze. He paused before saying: “As long as Miss quickly becomes engaged to someone, she would have no connection to the Jiang household. If anyone later tries to use Vice General Jiang as a scapegoat, Miss, not being a member of the Jiang household, naturally couldn’t be blamed for this, and could escape unscathed.”
“Master Gu makes sense,” Jiang Ruan sighed and said with a smile. “But at this time, who would be willing to become engaged to me? They’d be too busy avoiding me.”
“I will!” Gu Yi blurted out. Seeing Jiang Ruan’s expression, he hesitated momentarily, then gathered his courage: “I have admired Miss for a long time. The General’s household is not something petty villains can shake. If Miss is willing to become engaged to me, I will definitely cherish and protect Miss well, not letting Miss suffer the slightest grievance. With the General’s household to rely on, Miss certainly won’t be framed or troubled by others.”
Jiang Ruan looked at the young man before her with a smile. The man’s eyes were full of hope, even his emotions were burning hot. In her previous life, she had suffered the reputation of a demon woman and had never encountered such fervent expression. Unfortunately for Gu Yi, he had met her in this lifetime. Even such a pure and passionate confession could not move her in the slightest.
She lowered her gaze: “I’ll only ask Master Gu one thing: what would Master Gu say?”
Gu Yi stiffened. What would his father say? His father would naturally tell him to give up this obsession and not put the General’s household in jeopardy for the sake of one woman. But he looked at Jiang Ruan: “I will personally convince my father.”
Jiang Ruan shook her head: “Master Gu will not be able to convince him.” Her tone was gentle: “Thank you for Master Gu’s kind intentions, but I know my position is awkward. How could I marry into the General’s household? Not only Master Gu, but Madam Gu probably wouldn’t approve either. Going against one’s parents’ wishes to become engaged would only create another resentful couple. Master Gu has offered me this sentiment, and I will treasure it well in this lifetime. But insisting on pursuing this sentiment until it becomes unrecognizable is not what I wish for.”
Gu Yi grew anxious: “Miss Jiang…”
“Master Gu,” Jiang Ruan interrupted him: “Master Gu is no longer a youth and knows that everything requires paying a price. Is it really worth making the General’s household pay such a price for me? Do you know that marrying me would mean the General’s household would be constantly watched? Master Gu has climbed to his current position, but because of Master Gu’s decision, his career would be hindered, and Madam Gu would also suffer from worry. All for the sake of one woman – Master Gu, is it truly worth it?”
Gu Yi was rendered speechless by Jiang Ruan’s words. His previously confident thoughts couldn’t help but waver. For the sake of one Jiang Ruan, to put the General’s household in such a position – was it really worth it?
Jiang Ruan stepped back, her expression smiling: “Ruan appreciates Master Gu’s words today. Such precious sentiment, Ruan will remember well. When we meet in the future, we’ll still be friends. But the fate of being companions is not meant to be in this lifetime.”
Gu Yi’s mouth felt numb and bitter, so astringent it made his heart ache. The beauty was right before him, yet she seemed separated by thousands of mountains and rivers – they could never be together in this lifetime. Though Gu Yi was impulsive by nature, he could still distinguish right from wrong. If someone else had said these words to him, he might not have listened, but it was precisely because it was Jiang Ruan – his beloved – that his heart gradually cooled.
He smiled bitterly: “I understand. Then, if you weren’t a princess and I wasn’t the son of the General’s household, do you think there might be a possibility of fulfilling this fate?”
“There are no ‘what ifs’ in this world,” Jiang Ruan smiled slightly.
Gu Yi stepped back two paces, his face showing undisguised sadness: “No ‘what ifs’.” He shook his head, as if growing up in an instant. The difficult-to-sever attachment in his eyes made one’s heart clench in sympathy. He turned to leave, but after taking two steps, he paused and said: “I’ll also ask just one question: has Miss’s heart ever lingered on me for even a moment?”
“No,” Jiang Ruan answered with a smile.
Gu Yi’s body swayed twice. After a pause, he strode away with large steps.
Watching Gu Yi’s figure disappear, Jiang Ruan lowered her gaze and turned to return to the princess’s palace. Just as she turned around, she saw beneath the osmanthus tree a figure in black robes, cold and imposing. The young man stood quietly watching her, and she had no idea how long he had been standing there.