The imperial meal was laid out on the table, but Deng Yi didn’t immediately pick up his chopsticks as he usually would, instead merely pouring a cup of tea.
“When I first met Miss Chu, she had hit someone and then run away with her bundle,” he said. “And then all those events during the journey, after returning to the capital, and up to leading troops to the palace gate—you don’t listen to what others say, nor do you tell others much. You’re someone who decides what you want to do and then definitely does it.”
Chu Zhao remained silent for a moment. It seemed true. She had no choice; since her rebirth, she hadn’t had time to talk, and there were many things she couldn’t tell others.
“That’s not true,” she smiled. “I’ve always spoken properly with the Grand Tutor, whether during our earlier journey, after returning to the capital, or even at the palace gate. If I hadn’t spoken properly, how could the Grand Tutor have allowed me to see His Majesty?”
Thinking back on these events now, they felt as distant as a previous lifetime.
Deng Yi was silent for a moment, then shook his head: “Even if I hadn’t listened to you then and hadn’t opened the palace gate, Miss Chu wouldn’t have turned around and left at my command.”
He smiled, looking at the girl before him in magnificent palace attire, even more radiant than before.
“Miss Chu would have fought her way in.”
Chu Zhao thought for a moment, not denying it: “At that time, there was no other path to take. I could only fight for survival.”
Deng Yi said blandly: “Then how has the Empress now reached such a desperate state that she must split the court in two with a knife?”
Chu Zhao didn’t directly answer this question, but instead asked: “Lord Deng, do you remember what we discussed over tea after I returned from the border commandery?”
Deng Yi said nothing, lifting his tea for a sip.
“I said I wanted to be the Empress, to seriously be the Empress,” Chu Zhao continued. “I also asked you why you were so determined to become a high official, and you said it was to be happy.”
She looked at Deng Yi.
“Lord Deng, apart from wielding power and being surrounded by officials, have you ever considered that protecting the country, bringing peace to the people, and maintaining a clear court could bring even greater happiness?”
Deng Yi laughed heartily: “So Your Majesty wants to be impartial and just, work diligently for good governance, and create a golden age.”
Chu Zhao ignored his mockery and said earnestly: “Lord Deng, previously, when the country was unstable, facing both internal and external troubles, and given that your status and mine were inferior to others, we had to use various means to secure our positions. But you can’t maintain power for long just by using schemes, winning people’s hearts through machinations, and exchanging favors. The fact that you’ve reached your current position shows you’re a person of great talent, but you’ve never been able to fully utilize it. Now that you’ve become the Grand Tutor and have the final say at court, therefore—”
“Therefore, I can be a righteous official, hate evil as an enemy, take bold measures, eliminate corruption, and manifest justice in the world?” Deng Yi finished her thought. Halfway through his words, he burst into laughter, seeming unable to stop.
Chu Zhao didn’t speak further, just watching him.
“Chu Zhao,” Deng Yi stopped laughing and said, “Do you think you’re acting as a wise ruler? You’re merely being used as a tool by the Xie family. What court clarity? If you truly want clarity, first drive out your maternal relatives.”
He still believed she had been persuaded by the Xie family and had reached an agreement with Xie Yanfang. Chu Zhao said sincerely, “Achieving clarity can’t be done all at once. I’m not doing this because the Xie family is instigating me. If they slip up and I catch them, I’ll punish them severely too. Lord Deng, you have the ability, and Xie Yanfang also has the ability. As long as you’re used properly—”
Deng Yi didn’t want to hear this and waved his teacup: “No need to say more. You don’t need to say nice things to me. I can see how you view me in your heart.”
Chu Zhao said angrily, “How do I view you? I consider you a friend, a teacher—”
“An enemy,” Deng Yi finished her sentence.
Chu Zhao said helplessly: “I know you’re angry about what I’ve done, but I’m not targeting you.”
Deng Yi shook his head: “I know you’re not targeting me, but you’re guarding against me.” He looked at Chu Zhao, examining her bright eyes. “I know the Empress doesn’t trust me, and I’ve never asked you to trust me, but you’re now guarding against me. Have I threatened you in some way?”
Guarding, threatening—he also mentioned these words. Chu Zhao still remembered Xie Yanfang’s questioning and scrutiny when offering tea during their journey. She sighed inwardly.
No matter how deeply she concealed her thoughts, her external behavior inevitably revealed them.
Chu Zhao thought for a moment and said: “Regarding Liang Qiang’s matter, I am dissatisfied with you, but as you know, the border military affairs are the blood and sweat of my father and me. I truly care about them and fear something unexpected might happen.”
“So you believe I would ruin your life’s work, while the Xie family wouldn’t,” Deng Yi again finished her thought.
Chu Zhao was taken aback, then smiled bitterly: “Actually, it’s not because of you—”
It was probably due to that cursed fate.
Liang Qiang’s appearance had made her vigilant, and naturally, she had to be wary of Deng Yi as well.
After all, in that lifetime, Deng Yi had been Xiao Xun’s Grand Tutor.
How could she explain this?
“Your Majesty need not explain,” Deng Yi didn’t let her continue. “This matter is not significant. Your Majesty is the Empress, and I am the Grand Tutor. Between ruler and minister, dissatisfaction, distrust, or vigilance are all reasonable and common.”
Things had become more formal, but there was nothing to be done about it. It couldn’t be resolved with just a few words. Chu Zhao said: “I’ve said before, regardless of any misunderstandings, the Grand Tutor and I are similar people. We must—”
Deng Yi rotated his teacup, interrupting her: “Empress, since you know that you and I are similar people, why bother trying to persuade me to be a good person?”
Chu Zhao looked at him, about to say something, when Deng Yi raised his hand, gesturing to stop.
“No need to repeat those words. I only have one question.”
He looked at Chu Zhao with a half-smile.
“Your Majesty, after the Emperor personally takes power, can you put all this down and return to the inner palace, simply being an Empress who exemplifies virtue to the world?”
…
…
By the time Chu Zhao returned to the inner palace, night had fallen, and lights were shining brightly. Before she even entered her sleeping quarters, she saw eunuchs and palace maids running about.
They laughed and called out, “The Empress has returned.”
Then Xiao Yu happily came out from the hall to greet her: “Sister, you’re back.”
Chu Zhao reached out to take his hand and asked: “Have you eaten yet?”
Xiao Yu shook his head: “I was waiting for you, Sister.”
Chu Zhao led him into the hall: “Weren’t you afraid I might have eaten outside?” She looked at Eunuch Qi nearby, “Didn’t you tell His Majesty I went to see the Grand Tutor?”
Whenever she went somewhere, she would inform Eunuch Qi to promptly tell Xiao Yu, lest the child worry when he couldn’t find her.
Eunuch Qi said: “I did tell him, but His Majesty still wanted to wait.” Then with a smile, he asked, “Your Majesty, have you eaten?”
Chu Zhao had brought imperial meals to meet Deng Yi, but due to their unpleasant conversation, they hadn’t been able to eat together as before. She smiled and shook her head.
Eunuch Qi immediately clapped his hands: “His Majesty is truly divinely perceptive.”
Xiao Yu’s face lit up with a smile.
“His Majesty said that Your Majesty certainly hadn’t eaten, so he insisted on waiting for you,” Eunuch Qi explained. “This old servant even made a bet with His Majesty.”
He pretended to sigh with regret.
“This old servant, knowing Your Majesty had brought imperial meals, thought victory was assured.”
Chu Zhao smiled and asked Xiao Yu: “How did you know I hadn’t eaten?”
She wasn’t just feigning surprise. Previously, she would have had late suppers with Deng Yi, which everyone in the palace knew.
Xiao Yu said: “Because when Sister meets with the Grand Tutor, you’ll certainly argue, so how could you eat? Even if you did eat, it would just be Sister trying to ease the atmosphere, and you definitely wouldn’t eat well.”
During these days of confrontation between her and the court officials, Xiao Yu had watched everything from the dragon throne. But he wasn’t angry, frightened, or anxious. He didn’t ask or say much, completely sparing Chu Zhao from having to comfort him. Every day, he quietly attended court and studied.
After all, he was a child who had experienced life and death. Chu Zhao felt both gratified and admiring as she reached out to touch Xiao Yu’s shoulder.
“Your Majesty is truly intelligent, clear-eyed, and steady,” she praised.
Xiao Yu held her hand and said: “Yes, I will be a formidable emperor. Sister, don’t be afraid. In the future, I will protect you.”
Chu Zhao smiled and said “Good,” but her smile faltered slightly as Deng Yi’s words seemed to echo in her ears.
“You’re now wielding a knife to split the court to fight for your place. What about later? Will you hand it all over to that little Emperor?”
“You now contend with me for power out of concern for the world. In the future, when the little Emperor does the same for the world, will he also contend with you, Empress, for power?”
Xiao Yu pulled her hand, walking forward, interrupting Chu Zhao’s trance.
Chu Zhao looked at the child walking ahead of her, who had grown taller, and lowered her eyes slightly.
She had once trusted an emperor with all her heart. This time, could she do the same again?