The imperial meal was laid out on the table. Deng Yi didn’t pick up his chopsticks directly as he usually did, but only poured himself a cup of tea.
“When I met Miss Chu, it was after Miss Chu had hit someone and run away with her bundle,” he said. “Later on the journey, after returning to the capital, through all those various incidents, and then leading troops to the palace gates—you don’t listen to others, and you don’t say much to others. You’re someone who does whatever you want to do, and must do it.”
Chu Zhao was silent for a moment. It seemed to be true, but there was no help for it. Since her rebirth, she hadn’t had time for conversation, and many things couldn’t be shared with others.
“That’s not true,” she smiled. “I’ve always spoken properly with the Grand Tutor. Whether on the journey before, or later after returning to the capital, even at the palace gates—if I hadn’t spoken properly, how could the Grand Tutor have let me see His Majesty?”
Thinking back on these matters now felt as distant as a previous lifetime.
Deng Yi was silent for a moment, then shook his head. “Even if I hadn’t listened to you then, hadn’t opened the palace gates, Miss Chu wouldn’t have listened to me and turned back.”
He smiled, looking at the girl before him in her splendid palace attire, even more radiant than back then.
“Miss Chu would have fought her way in.”
Chu Zhao thought about it and didn’t deny it. “At that time there was no other path—I could only fight for survival.”
Deng Yi said flatly, “Then how is it that Her Majesty the Empress now has reached the point of no other path, and must hack the court to pieces with a blade?”
Chu Zhao didn’t directly answer this question, but instead asked, “Lord Deng, do you remember what we said when we had tea together after I returned from the border regions?”
Deng Yi said nothing and raised his tea to drink.
“I said I wanted to be Empress, to seriously be the Empress,” Chu Zhao continued. “I also asked you what you wanted to be a high official for, and you said it was to be happy.”
She looked at Deng Yi.
“Lord Deng, besides holding power and being surrounded by officials, have you ever thought that protecting the nation and its people, and having a clear and upright court could bring even greater happiness?”
Deng Yi laughed heartily. “So Her Majesty wants to be impartial and selfless, work diligently for the state, and create a prosperous era.”
Chu Zhao ignored his mockery and said earnestly, “Lord Deng, previously the nation was unstable with internal troubles and external threats. You and I, with our origins and positions inferior to others, had to use various means to secure our positions. But relying only on conspiracies and schemes, winning hearts through benefit exchanges—that can’t last long. That you’ve come this far shows you’re a person of great talent, just that you’ve never been able to fully display it. Now you’ve become the Grand Tutor, and you’re the one in charge of this court, so—”
“So I can become an upright official, hate evil like an enemy, act boldly and decisively, eliminate corruption, and manifest justice in this world?” Deng Yi took over her words. Halfway through speaking, he laughed heartily, as if unable to stop.
Chu Zhao said nothing more, only watching him.
“Chu Zhao,” Deng Yi stopped laughing and said, “do you really think you’re being a wise ruler? You’re just being used as a tool by the Xie clan. What clear and upright court? If you want true clarity, first drive out the external relatives.”
He still thought she had been persuaded by the Xie clan and reached an agreement with Xie Yanfang. Chu Zhao said sincerely, “Achieving clarity can’t be done all at once. I’m not doing this because the Xie clan instigated me. If they have evidence against them that falls into my hands, I’ll punish them severely too. Lord Deng, you have ability, Xie Yanfang also has ability. As long as they’re used properly—”
Deng Yi didn’t want to hear this. He waved his teacup dismissively. “No need to say more. You don’t need to say nice things to me. I can see how you view me in your heart.”
Chu Zhao said indignantly, “How do I view you? I consider you a friend, a teacher—”
“An enemy,” Deng Yi finished for her.
Chu Zhao said helplessly, “I know what I’ve done makes you angry, but I’m not targeting you.”
Deng Yi shook his head. “I know you’re not targeting me, but you’re guarding against me.” He looked at Chu Zhao, scrutinizing her bright eyes. “I know you don’t trust me, Empress, and I’ve never demanded that you trust me. But now you’re guarding against me. Have I threatened you somehow?”
Guarding, threatening—he also mentioned these words. Chu Zhao still remembered Xie Yanfang’s questioning and scrutiny when he offered tea on the journey. She sighed softly in her heart.
No matter how deeply she hid her thoughts, her outward behavior inevitably revealed them.
Chu Zhao thought for a moment and said, “The matter with Liang Qiang—I was dissatisfied with you, my lord. But you know, the border army campaign is the life’s work of my father and me. I truly care about it deeply and fear something might happen to it.”
“So you believe I would destroy your life’s work, but the Xie clan wouldn’t,” Deng Yi again took over her words.
Chu Zhao was stunned, then smiled bitterly. “Actually, it’s not because of you—”
It was that damned fate.
Liang Qiang’s appearance made her vigilant, and naturally, inevitably, she had to be vigilant toward Deng Yi as well.
After all, in that life, Deng Yi had been Xiao Xun’s Grand Tutor.
How could she explain this?
“Your Majesty need not continue,” Deng Yi didn’t let her explain. “This matter is actually nothing. Your Majesty is the Empress, I am the Grand Tutor. Between sovereign and minister, whether dissatisfaction, distrust, or wariness—all are natural and commonplace.”
They had grown distant after all. But there was no help for it—this couldn’t be resolved with just a word or two. Chu Zhao said, “I said before, regardless of any misunderstandings, the Grand Tutor and I are the same kind of people. We must—”
Deng Yi turned his teacup, interrupting her. “Your Majesty, since you know you and I are the same kind of people, why still try to persuade me to be a good person?”
Chu Zhao looked at him, about to say something, when Deng Yi raised his hand dismissively.
“No need to repeat those words. I only want to ask one thing.”
He looked at Chu Zhao with a half-smile.
“Your Majesty, after His Majesty begins to rule personally, can you let go of all this, return to the inner palace, and only be an Empress who embodies virtue for the realm?”
……
……
When Chu Zhao returned to the inner palace, night had already fallen and the lamps were brilliant. Before even entering the sleeping quarters, she saw eunuchs and palace maids running about.
They called out with smiles, “The Empress has returned.”
Then Xiao Yu happily emerged from the hall. “Sister, you’re back.”
Chu Zhao reached out to take his hand, asking, “Have you eaten?”
Xiao Yu shook his head. “I was waiting for sister.”
Chu Zhao led him into the hall. “Weren’t you afraid I’d already eaten outside?” She looked at Eunuch Qi beside them. “Didn’t you tell His Majesty I went to see the Grand Tutor?”
Each time she went somewhere, she would tell Eunuch Qi so he could promptly inform Xiao Yu, so the child wouldn’t worry when he couldn’t see her and didn’t know her whereabouts.
Eunuch Qi said, “I did tell him, but His Majesty still wanted to wait.” He smiled and asked, “Your Majesty, did you eat?”
Chu Zhao had brought the imperial meal to see Deng Yi, but because the conversation was unpleasant, they hadn’t been able to eat together as before. She smiled and shook her head.
Eunuch Qi immediately clapped his hands. “His Majesty is truly brilliant and perceptive!”
Xiao Yu broke into a smile.
“His Majesty said Your Majesty definitely hadn’t eaten, so he insisted on waiting for you,” Eunuch Qi explained. “This old servant even made a bet with His Majesty.”
He pretended to sigh with regret.
“This old servant, relying on knowing Your Majesty had brought imperial food, thought I had a sure win.”
Chu Zhao asked Xiao Yu with a smile, “How did you know I hadn’t eaten?”
This wasn’t feigned surprise. Previously she would also share late meals with Deng Yi—everyone in the palace knew this.
Xiao Yu said, “Because sister went to see the Grand Tutor. You two will definitely argue, so how could you eat?” He sighed softly. “Even if you did eat, it would be sister trying to ease the atmosphere, and you definitely wouldn’t eat well.”
These past days, the confrontation between her and the court officials—Xiao Yu, sitting on the dragon throne, had naturally seen it all. But he wasn’t angry, frightened, or anxious. He didn’t ask many questions or say much, completely sparing Chu Zhao from having to comfort him. Every day he quietly attended court and studied.
After all, he was a child who had experienced life and death. Chu Zhao felt both gratified and admiring, reaching out to stroke Xiao Yu’s shoulder.
“His Majesty is truly wise, clear-eyed and clear-hearted, and steady and dignified,” she praised.
Xiao Yu held her hand and said, “Yes, I’ll be a very capable emperor. Sister, you don’t need to be afraid. In the future, I’ll protect you.”
Chu Zhao smiled and said that was good, but her smile paused slightly. Deng Yi’s words seemed to echo in her ears again.
“You’re now wielding a blade to split open the court to fight for a place to stand—but what about the future? Will you hand it over to that little emperor?”
“You’re now concerned for the realm and thus contending with me for power—but in the future, when the little emperor acts for the realm, won’t he also have to contend with you, the Empress, for power?”
Xiao Yu pulled her hand forward, interrupting Chu Zhao’s distraction.
Chu Zhao looked at the child walking ahead, who had grown taller again, and lowered her eyes slightly.
She had once trusted an emperor with her whole heart. So this time, could she do the same again?