HomeRebirthChapter 109: I Cannot Do It

Chapter 109: I Cannot Do It

In a cave, the three people had struggled to gather some dry firewood. Outside, the heavy rain continued to fall. After lighting a fire, the cave became slightly warmer.

The three removed their outer garments and placed them near the fire to dry.

The night of fighting had left them exhausted. Even the child now sat quietly hugging his knees, not saying a word.

Chu Qiao’s expression was calm. The child leaned against her side, his small back so frail. She seemed to be thinking about something, yet also seemed to be thinking of nothing. She just sat there, her head resting against the cold stone.

Zhuge Yue seemed unable to bear the awkward silence and gloom. His brows furrowed tightly. Finally, with a sigh, he stood up and said in a deep voice, “The firewood is almost gone. I’ll go out to gather some more.” Then he walked toward the exit.

“Zhuge Yue!”

Chu Qiao suddenly cried out as if startled.

Zhuge Yue was surprised and turned back to look at her strangely, asking, “What’s wrong?”

“No… nothing,” Chu Qiao’s expression was somewhat flustered as she hurriedly shook her head. “It’s nothing.”

Zhuge Yue raised his eyebrows slightly and asked curiously, “Are you all right? Weren’t you uninjured?”

Chu Qiao forced a weak smile and said, “I’m fine.”

Zhuge Yue nodded. “Wait here.” Just as he was about to leave, he turned back to instruct, “Watch the little one, don’t… don’t wander off.”

“Mm,” Chu Qiao nodded and smiled. “Go ahead.”

Zhuge Yue turned and walked out, but after just two steps, Chu Qiao called out again, “Wait.”

Zhuge Yue stopped, and Chu Qiao rushed forward, placing the Breaking Moon sword in Zhuge Yue’s hand. Then she examined his wounds, which weren’t too serious. Her eyes bright, she looked at him and said softly, “Be careful.”

Zhuge Yue was stunned. He looked at Chu Qiao strangely for a moment, then nodded and walked out of the cave with an expressionless face.

But as soon as he left the cave, a smile appeared at the corner of the man’s mouth, as if he could no longer hold it back. He childishly rubbed his nose, his facial features gradually softening, his eyes so bright.

Zhuge Yue had already gone far, but Chu Qiao still stood in place. Her expression was strange, as if she were very tired, yet also full of regret.

She sat back down by the fire, stroking the child’s head, and asked softly, “Your name is Mo’er, right?”

The child nodded but didn’t speak.

“You’re very sad, aren’t you?”

The child still didn’t speak. Chu Qiao sighed softly. She gently embraced the child’s small body and said softly, “I know you’re hurting.”

A tear suddenly fell, landing on Chu Qiao’s hand. The child sobbed, saying brokenly, “Xingxing… Xingxing…”

Chu Qiao’s heart was instantly filled with grief. Thinking of the small girl with a bright smile was like having a knife carving at her heart.

“Mo’er, do you hate those people?”

The child might not yet understand the meaning of the word “hate,” but he suddenly clenched his small fists tightly and said fiercely, “Mo’er will grow up quickly, learn kung fu like uncle, and then kill those bad people.”

Chu Qiao suddenly didn’t know what to say. What could she say? That revenge begets revenge without end? That violence cannot solve everything? She didn’t even dare to look into the child’s eyes. Her hands trembled uncontrollably, the sorrow in her heart so deep. She could only gently pat the child’s trembling back, nodding with a choked voice, “Then you must work hard. Even if you can’t kill your enemies, you can at least protect yourself.”

“Mo’er will kill them!” The child raised his small fist with determination, then turned to look at Chu Qiao innocently, asking, “Will sister teach Mo’er skills?”

Chu Qiao smiled bitterly and said, “In the future, you must follow that uncle well, listen to him, and be a good child. He will take care of you and also teach you skills.”

The child blinked his eyes and asked incisively, “What about sister?”

Chu Qiao was stunned. She took a deep breath and said with feigned ease, “Sister will come to see Mo’er when she has the chance.”

This child was truly clever. He was instantly alarmed and grabbed Chu Qiao’s sleeve tightly, asking loudly, “Are you leaving?”

Chu Qiao shook her head and embraced the child’s small body. It seemed as if she was speaking to him, yet also as if she was speaking to herself, her tone so gentle: “Mo’er, you are very unfortunate, but you are also very lucky. Your parents died at the hands of others, and your enemies are very powerful. You could never fight against them on your own. Originally, you were supposed to die too, but someone was willing to save you. Although your home is gone, someone will take care of you and protect you in the future. In this respect, you are fortunate.”

“But in this world, there are some who are more unfortunate than you. Their grudges are deeper than yours, and their enemies are more powerful. They endured humiliation for many years, with no one willing to help them. They could only rely on themselves, being bullied and insulted by others. So, the resentment in their hearts is even heavier than yours.”

Chu Qiao smiled quietly. Her hand rested on the child’s head, her smile so kind, even somewhat compassionate. She said softly, “Therefore, no matter what you do in the future, sister will forgive you, because sister knows what you’ve been through and why you’ve become what you are. But when you do something wrong, sister will try to stop you.”

“Sister,” the child said loudly, “Mo’er won’t do anything wrong. I’ll listen to sister in everything.”

“Good child,” Chu Qiao embraced the child, sighing softly, “I hope you will remember your words today in the future.”

The fire crackled, and the child grew sleepy. Chu Qiao found some dry grass for Mo’er to lie on. Soon, the child’s soft snores could be heard.

Chu Qiao’s expression was calm as she quietly looked at the sleeping face of the child. For a moment, she seemed to return to many years ago, after that massacre, in that dilapidated, leaking house. The pale face of the youth, his tightly knit brows, and their low growls together with lowered voices:

“Survive, even if like a dog.”

In the blink of an eye, so many years had passed.

She picked up a twig and wrote a few words on the ground, her strokes so heavy, as if she had poured her entire heart and soul into them.

Finally, she took one last look at the cave, one last look at the small child, then took a deep breath and walked out of the cave without looking back!

The sound of a horse’s neigh immediately rang out, followed by the rumble of hooves in the pouring rain.

Zhuge Yue returned quickly. He had even caught a rabbit. Smiling, he walked into the cave, about to speak, but immediately froze.

“Kid! Kid!”

Zhuge Yue hurriedly woke the child. Mo’er rubbed his eyes and looked at him drowsily, saying, “Uncle.”

Zhuge Yue’s face turned ashen as he hurriedly asked, “Where is Chu Qiao? Where is she?”

“Sister?” The child frowned in confusion, pointing to the direction where Chu Qiao had been sitting. “Sister was there, ah? Where is sister?”

Zhuge Yue released him and ran out of the cave in a few steps. Sure enough, one horse was missing.

“Uncle! There are words here!”

Hearing this, Zhuge Yue hurried back to find several lines of delicate small characters near the fire. The strokes were deep, showing how complex the writer’s emotions had been.

“I’ve left. Don’t look for me. I won’t go back to seek revenge and get myself killed. Take care of Mo’er.”

Below these words was another line in slightly messy handwriting: “Zhuge Yue, thank you.”

Thank you, for what?

For sparing her life, for the assistance along the way, or for the friendship in caring for this child?

Zhuge Yue suddenly let out an angry shout and kicked away the fire that had been so difficult to light. Mo’er was startled and shrank back, afraid to approach.

Zhuge Yue strode forward, about to run out of the cave.

“Uncle!” The child, afraid of being abandoned, cried out, “Where are you going?”

Yes, where was he going? To chase after her? What right did he have?

Zhuge Yue suddenly laughed coldly, then threw away the things in his hand and stood in the spacious cave, raising his head, his breathing deep. He mocked himself in a low voice, “Zhuge Yue, you fool!”

Outside, the rain poured down heavily, enough to cause another flood along the banks of the Red Water River.

Chu Qiao galloped through the cold rain. Her mind was blank, but all the events had connected. She cursed herself silently for being so foolish, needing to see with her own eyes to understand everything.

Her blood suddenly grew hot, her eyes bright, her breathing rapid.

The sound of hoofbeats echoed as she raced madly through the wilderness.

The gray sky was cold. After riding for an unknown length of time, she finally saw the low-lying valley again.

All her strength seemed to leave her at once. She sat dazed on horseback, looking at the empty valley, her blood cooling inch by inch.

Jumping off the horse, she walked through the mud, one foot deep, one foot shallow. Sure enough, in that place, she saw little Xingxing’s small body once again.

Two hours later, a new grave was hastily erected. Below it were buried three innocent lives.

Chu Qiao stood before the grave. With a swish, she thrust her knife into the ground beside it, then, disregarding the filth on the ground, knelt.

“Xingxing, I’m sorry.”

Chu Qiao spoke in a low tone, her voice carrying a hint of powerless grief. “Sister can no longer avenge you.”

“Bang!”

A head struck heavily on the ground, splashing mud in all directions. She just knelt there silently. It seemed there was so much she wanted to say, yet she knew that whatever she said would sound like an exquisite irony. Her hands clutched tightly at the withered grass on the ground. Her gaze was resilient, yet tears gradually flowed out. She didn’t know if she was crying in sorrow for the child’s death or something else.

“I’m sorry! I cannot do it!”

Her voice choked. Then she suddenly stood up, climbed onto the horse, and rode quickly toward Tang Jing.

It should have been afternoon, but the sky was so dark, with pitch-black clouds pressing down from above, making it almost impossible to breathe.

The wind blew through the forest, making rustling sounds. Everything watched the gradually disappearing figure, including the small new grave.

The wind and rain were desolate, leaves fell one after another. When would this damp, cold weather clear up?

At the same time, a hundred miles away, the gates of Tang Jing city opened with a rumble. An elegant carriage sped out like lightning. The driver, only eighteen or nineteen years old, grimaced as he said to the person inside, “Your Highness, we can’t go any faster. The horses are about to collapse!”

“Hurry, hurry!” The person in the carriage urged loudly, then stuck out a face as bewitching as a demon. Dressed in bright red brocade robes as if attending a wedding, with a pair of phoenix eyes slightly upturned, he quickly said, “If I get caught again this time, I’ll order both your sisters to enter the palace to serve in bed.”

Upon hearing this, the young man’s face instantly showed alarm. He immediately became energetic, vigorously raising his whip and striking the horse’s flank with a swish.

The horse let out a long neigh and immediately galloped forward frantically.

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