Late in the eleventh month of the twelfth year of Zhenning’s reign.

Emperor Zhenning reformed the Eastern Investigation Bureau. Amid fierce criticism from the Donglin Party, twenty-four-year-old Deng Ying assumed the position of Superintendent Eunuch of the Eastern Bureau.

Yang Wan finally turned past the chapter on the Tongjia Tragedy in her notes.

Taking advantage of her few days off at the month’s end, she shut herself in her room and carefully organized the historical events around the twelfth year of Zhenning’s reign.

From the Three Departments’ investigation of the Liuli Factory corruption case to Deng Ying’s trial at the Ministry of Justice to Zhang Zhanchun taking the blame and being assassinated by the Ceremonial Department, which triggered collective unrest among the civil official groups. Under the subtle guidance of He Yixian, the Ceremonial Department’s Controller, Zhang Luo brutally killed over eighty teachers and students at Tongjia Academy to suppress this internal court rebellion among civil officials. However, this ultimately aroused the emperor’s suspicion, leading him to establish the Eastern Investigation Bureau to monitor the Northern Security Office.

These events gradually filled the gaps in modern research, painting the seemingly clean spring and summer of the twelfth year with “bold and heavy strokes.”

Yang Wan set down her brush and sat under the lamp, rubbing her tired eyes before closing her notebook and walking to the window.

It was snowing that day, but the snowflakes were fine like dust, accumulating only a thin layer on the pine branches.

Li Yu suddenly popped his head up from beneath the window. “Hey!”

Yang Wan was startled and almost closed the window.

“You little brat, are you trying to get yourself killed?”

Li Yu hugged a basket of coal, “Keep your voice down, I’m bringing you something good.”

Yang Wan looked down at the coal basket and saw it was decent-quality charcoal. “Did you go bother Chen Hua again? The palace hasn’t even distributed coal to the servants yet.”

Li Yu pouted.

“What are you thinking? Other places might not have any, but how could the Ceremonial Department not have any? Several secretaries got some, this basket is from Deng Ying… no, damn, look at my mouth. This basket is from our Factory Director, I got it myself from the Fuel Conservation Office, but he didn’t keep any, and told me to bring it all to you.”

Yang Wan pulled her clothes tighter, “I’m not afraid of the cold, what’s he giving it to me for? His injuries haven’t fully healed yet.”

Li Yu sighed, “That’s true. Once you become a secretary, you’re always in His Majesty’s sight. Even if you’re not well, you have to struggle to show up. I can see his wounds are hard to heal.”

Yang Wan didn’t respond to this, seeing him shivering, she said:

“Do you want to come in and sit for a while? I’ll pour you some hot tea.”

Li Yu was about to nod, but suddenly remembered something and remained standing below the window: “I wouldn’t dare. You ladies of the Imperial Dressing Bureau are all heavenly fairies, and your chambers are celestial palaces. With my lowly status, if I stepped on your ground, the Jade Emperor would surely cut short my life.”

Yang Wan said helplessly: “What nonsense are you talking about? This is your sister’s room too.”

Li Yu pursed his lips and said: “That’s right though. I may be a dung ball, but my sister is a fairy.”

Hearing these words, Yang Wan suddenly remembered something Deng Ying had once said and fell silent.

Seeing her sudden silence, Li Yu tentatively asked: “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

Yang Wan lowered her head to hide her expression. “Is Deng Ying still living in that place? I heard people from the Ceremonial Department say he was going to move.”

Li Yu nodded, “Yes, originally they said he would move to the duty room by the north gate of the Hall of Mental Cultivation, but he said that entire area would later be demolished to place auspicious vats, so he’s still living next to the Imperial Household Department. But don’t worry, which ancestral secretary doesn’t have a residence outside? Even if he hasn’t saved up enough silver yet, those officials outside are competing to give him one. He won’t be suffering for long. By the way, why haven’t you gone to see him these past few days?”

Yang Wan rotated her slightly sore wrist.

Near the year’s end, there were many ceremonial rituals in the inner court, and noble ladies would occasionally enter the palace to pay respects to Consort Ning and the Empress. Yang Wan and Song Yunqing hadn’t had free time for many days.

“It’s year-end, the Imperial Dressing Bureau is busy.”

“Oh.”

Li Yu hesitated for a while, “To tell you… he’s quite strange too. The Inner School selected two twelve or thirteen-year-old eunuch boys to serve him, but he doesn’t make those children do any work. Now that he’s feeling better, on a sunny day recently, he even starched his bedding.”

Yang Wan smiled, “Are you saying this because you want me to go help him?”

Li Yu hurriedly said: “I wouldn’t dare. I need to go for my shift now. I’ll leave the coal by the wall for you. Remember to bring it in early, it won’t light well if it gets wet from snow.”

With that, he hunched his shoulders and walked shivering into the snow.

Yang Wan closed the window and went to drag the basket of coal inside, then turned to wash her hands.

The icy water stung her bones, and she quickly pulled her hands back, thinking of Li Yu mentioning Deng Ying starching his bedding, she couldn’t help but purse her lips.

She looked up at the window, where snow was falling like fine sand, blanketing everything.

In such cold weather, forget about the cane wounds, his old ankle injury must be bothering him too.

Thinking this, Yang Wan went in and put on a cotton-padded jacket, tucked her hand warmer inside, and left the Fifth Division, closing the door behind her.

She made a trip to the Imperial Pharmacy.

Imperial Physician Peng told Yang Wan that since she had brought Deng Ying to see him about the foot injury, he had been dutifully coming to the Imperial Pharmacy every month to get medicine for his foot. Yang Wan asked: “Has he gotten next month’s medicine yet?”

Imperial Physician Peng asked a young eunuch: “Is Deng Ying’s medicine still there?”

The young eunuch quickly responded, “Yes, Factory Director Deng hasn’t come to get it yet.”

Yang Wan said: “Then give it to me.”

Imperial Physician Peng smiled and nodded, “I’ve added an extra ingredient, white angelica. Please remind him that he needs to simmer it half an hour longer than the previous medicine.”

Yang Wan took it and replied: “Yes. Thank you very much, Imperial Physician.”

Imperial Physician Peng said: “I should thank you too, Miss. I wasn’t at ease with this patient, he’s not an obedient one, but he seems to listen to everything you say.”

Yang Wan curtsied, “He doesn’t mean to be difficult, sometimes he just can’t help it. I’ll talk to him more in the future, and won’t let him trouble you.”

After she said this, all the attendants and medical officials in the room smiled.

The medicinal fragrance was especially warm.

Yang Wan realized that when Deng Ying got a brief respite to recover, her own heart settled down too. She even thought about living a normal life, reading books with him, making some food, tidying up the house, and doing laundry.

Before, she had been so busy she couldn’t stop for a moment, believing that as long as she was still breathing, she had to crawl to the research room and library. She didn’t care what she ate as long as she didn’t starve and didn’t think about what to wear as long as she didn’t freeze. Today she suddenly wanted to find a mirror to check herself – carrying the medicine all this way, was her hair messy, had her hairpin shifted?

By the time she reached the city moat carrying the herbs, the snow had gradually stopped.

The midday yang energy had slightly gathered, and the sun managed to struggle out half its face.

Deng Ying’s door was open. When Yang Wan reached the doorway, she saw him half-kneeling on the ground, organizing books in a book chest.

Perhaps to make it easier to tend to his injuries, he wasn’t dressed very thickly. His wide sleeves were tied back with a cotton rope, exposing most of his forearms.

He didn’t know Yang Wan had arrived and was softly reciting text from the books while sorting them by category.

Yang Wan saw the pile of books tilting and couldn’t help saying:

“Eh? Be careful, the books on the table are about to fall!”

Hearing her voice, Deng Ying’s hand jerked, and all the books he had just stacked on the table scattered to the ground.

Seeing this, Yang Wan gave a helpless laugh, quickly put down the medicine she was carrying, and went over to help him pick them up.

“I’m sorry, I forgot to knock.”

Deng Ying blocked her hand saying: “You sit down, I’ll pick them up.”

Yang Wan didn’t listen to him, instead saying: “Don’t argue with me, I was trained by the Imperial Dressing Bureau. I may not be as good as you at other things, but I’m better at this kind of work.”

After saying this, she quickly categorized the scattered books.

“Why do you have so many more books here?”

Deng Ying crouched beside her helping, “Do you think I shouldn’t keep them?”

“No.”

Yang Wan continued sorting while saying: “Your previous quarters must have had many books too.”

After saying this, she picked up a neat stack and walked to the bookshelf, carefully arranging them.

“You passed the imperial examination at fourteen, how remarkable. When you were young and studying, you must have pushed yourself very hard.”

“Mm.”

Deng Ying remained crouching on the ground, looking up at Yang Wan’s back, “When I was young, I thought reading books would let me govern the country and bring peace to the world.”

Yang Wan craned her neck to check the book spines she had arranged, casually saying: “That statement is true no matter when.”

She turned around after speaking, patting the dust off herself.

Opening the medicine package on the table, “I helped you get next month’s medicine. Imperial Physician Peng said he added white angelica, it needs to be simmered half an hour longer.”

Deng Ying stood up and walked to the table, “Alright. But you don’t need to do this, my injuries are much better, I can get it myself.”

Yang Wan smiled, “I just happened to help you get it today. I came to see you because I wanted to do something else.”

“What?”

Yang Wan stepped back to sit at the table, looking around while rolling up her sleeves, “Li Yu said you were cleaning the room by yourself, so he asked me to come help you.”

Deng Ying was stunned, “Don’t listen to him.”

Yang Wan looked up and smiled, “Don’t ask him about it when he comes back, he’s afraid of you now.”

She covered her mouth and laughed, but Deng Ying seemed at a loss.

“Then… what about you?”

Yang Wan shook her head, “I’m joking. Living like this, isn’t it because you don’t want us to be afraid of you?”

Deng Ying was silent for a while, then lifted his robe to sit beside Yang Wan, seeming to want to speak but holding back.

Yang Wan asked softly: “Tell me, if you don’t say it, how can I guess?”

Deng Ying raised his head, “When I was injured, I allowed myself to offend you, so… no matter what I become in the future, you can do anything to me.”

Yang Wan’s heart softened, “I know, you’re in this position not for yourself, but for us, but you should also let yourself live a better life. You’re now a Secretary of the Ceremonial Department, and also a Factory Director. Even our superiors in the Imperial Dressing Bureau have to bow to you, let alone me. Saying such things to me now, aren’t you afraid of shortening my life?”

Deng Ying shook his head, “The oath I made to Master Yang, I’ve always kept it in my heart. Sometimes, I’m afraid I really will fulfill that oath. So Yang Wan, in front of you, I’ll atone for what I can. I said before, I can’t bear anything else, I can only ask for your pity.”

Yang Wan was silent for a while, looking at his arm resting flat on the table, she called his name, “Deng Ying.”

“Mm.”

“Does it make you feel better to live as if you’re a sinner?”

She had hit the mark but dared not delve deeper. If she said more, she feared she would hurt Deng Ying.

After his initial shock, Deng Ying slowly nodded, lowering his eyes to say: “With you, yes.”

After speaking, he avoided Yang Wan’s gaze, “If not like this, I wouldn’t dare face you, nor could I face Master Yang.”

“Alright.”

Yang Wan looked at him with a smile, “Then from now on, will you listen to what I say?”