Zhou Yu went traveling alone.

She didn’t say specifically where.

Sun Jingcheng only received the notification after she had already departed. He was a bit angry—he’d been busy with work these past few days, planning to find time to go climb Mount Hua with her.

Taking advantage of lunch break, he returned to the new district. Sure enough, her backpack was gone. He instinctively replied to her, “You’re really selfish!”

Zhou Yu replied, “You used to do this too. You also only told me right before leaving.”

Sun Jingcheng replied, “I wasn’t conscious of it then—I didn’t do it on purpose!” After sending it, he realized something was wrong and quickly recalled it. Too late. Because Zhou Yu had also replied to him, “I wasn’t conscious of it either.”

…

Sun Jingcheng was exasperated. “So you’re deliberately getting revenge on me?”

Zhou Yu replied, “I was scrolling through videos this morning and got the idea on the spur of the moment.”

Sun Jingcheng asked, “What video?”

Zhou Yu replied, “Not telling you.”

Sun Jingcheng asked, “Where did you go?”

Zhou Yu replied, “No… sig… sig… signal… anymore.” After that, no more replies.

…

In the afternoon, busy until three or four, he gradually calmed down and messaged her, “Don’t scrimp on money. Stay at the best hotels. Lock the door at night when you sleep.” Then he transferred some money to her. After working a bit more, he left early and went to the family housing complex.

He first carried Grandma downstairs, pushed her out for a stroll, then came back and ate the dinner Feng Yiqun had cooked. Finally, with nothing to do, he returned to the clinic. By this time, his anger had completely dissipated. He sent her a message: “I’m taking care of things at home. Have a good time for a few days.”

He couldn’t help but say a few more words: “That’s enough. I get it. I’ll never leave without saying anything again. I’ll report a week in advance from now on.” Then he thought of her vengeful character, how to win at badminton against him, she actually hired a private coach and practiced hard for half a year—he had to admire that!

This was completely his own romantic notion. Zhou Yu practiced badminton because at the school’s annual sports festival, teachers had to participate in one event.

Upstairs, the three kids were completely liberated—sprawled on the sofa, some watching cartoons, some playing games. Because even Ke Yu had gone to Beijing to play, they played even more righteously. Someone’s summer homework was being stepped on the floor, but they didn’t care at all—whoever wanted to step on it could step on it! Best to trample away the four big characters “Happy Summer Vacation” on top. Assigning homework for summer vacation was bad enough—and they still wanted the people doing homework to be happy!

Sun Jingcheng picked up the summer homework, dusted off the shoe prints, and tossed it into the inner room. Sun’s mother was threading a needle. After a long time unable to thread it, she called Sun Jingcheng to help her.

Sun Jiaxing shouted not to darn his socks—even if she darned them, he wouldn’t wear them. Taking them off at night in the dorm was embarrassing. Sun’s mother couldn’t be bothered with him. A pair of socks cost over ten yuan, and in a few days there’d be a hole, then another hole in a few more days—even the sock seller couldn’t keep up.

“Your Second Sister-in-law isn’t one for managing a household either. She buys a dozen pairs at once, and when they get holes, she just throws them away.” Sun’s mother grumbled. “Same with shoes. The school requires those Shanghai what’s-it-called, but she thinks they make feet stink, so she buys those… the ones with the checkmark, what are they called?”

“Grandma, that’s called Nike.”

“Each time she buys several pairs. Don’t they still make feet stink? His feet are like iron—after wearing them a while, he kicks them apart. I take them to the shoe shop to repair, but after I repair them, that little devil still won’t wear them. In the end, I give them to people, and they treasure them!”

“And his clothes—the ones he can’t wear anymore, I collect and give to people. Your Second Sister-in-law even said… said giving old clothes to people doesn’t look good. But they treasure them! Their grandson wears them every day playing in the street.”

“Good for nothing—every one of them is spoiled by fortune.” Sun’s mother took off her reading glasses, rubbing her sore shoulders.

Sun Jingcheng threaded the needle and handed it to her, then massaged her shoulders. Sun’s mother hung her head, pointing out which spots were sore, then went on with household matters.

Normally, Sun Jingcheng wouldn’t listen—he’d have gone downstairs already. But a while ago Sun Youping had told them to be patient with their mother—it was just trivial talk, so listen if they could.

Sun’s mother talked about the aunt upstairs, saying her husband died last year, and this year she kept seeing her wandering around. “At noon she doesn’t sleep either, just wanders back and forth under the blazing sun, from this street to that street. I saw she was really too lonely, so I invited her to chat at the clinic. Didn’t expect that afterwards she wouldn’t go anywhere else—every day she comes to sit at the clinic. Even when no one chats with her, she sits and won’t leave.”

Sun Jingcheng parted the hair at the back of her head. “Mom, your hair is completely white.”

“What’s so surprising about that? When people get old, their hair naturally turns white.” Sun’s mother didn’t mind. “Around New Year’s I’ll dye it black.”

“Oh right, you’re not using protection, are you?”

“Protection from what?”

“Aren’t you planning to have a child?”

…

Sun Jingcheng cleared his throat and made an affirmative sound.

Sun’s mother looked at the grandchildren and instructed him in a low voice, “When you’re doing that, take a pillow and put it under Zhou Yu’s waist…”

Sun Jingcheng couldn’t listen anymore and prepared to leave.

Sun’s mother grabbed him. “I won’t say anymore, I won’t. Massage a bit more—it’s been really sore lately.”

Over there, the kids had watched something. Sun Jiarui asked, “Grandma, if I die, will this world still exist?”

…

“Yes!” Sun’s mother replied irritably. “The earth will keep spinning without you! What kind of questions do you ask all day?”

Sun Jiarui started feeling distressed. Once he died, he’d never see this world again, couldn’t eat delicious food or drink delicious drinks. And after he died, Dad, Mom, Grandpa, Grandma… all his family would still be in this world eating and drinking. Just like when Uncle died, they still ate spicy strips and watched TV?

He finally understood—understood what a sad thing death was. He wasn’t afraid of dying, but he was afraid that after he died, the family he deeply loved would still be alive! They would eventually forget him!

Deeply loved—deep love—this was a vocabulary word the teacher taught before summer vacation, saying it was used to express the intensity of emotion, more profound than liking or loving!

The teacher asked if when they saw this word, there was a corresponding person in their minds whom they considered deeply loved. Sun Jiarui’s first thought was Dad, Mom, Grandpa, Grandma, Jiaxing, Yuyan, Ke Yu… a long string, countless! Thinking of this, he said with tears in his eyes, “Grandma, I deeply love you.”

…

“Uncle, I deeply love you too…” Then he burst into tears. “I don’t want to die! I don’t want to leave you all! I don’t want to die while you’re still alive!”

…

Great—once he cried and mentioned death, Sun Yuyan had been fine watching cartoons, but suddenly thought of Dad, thought of adults saying Dad had died, and he also started crying sadly.

Zhou Yu hadn’t even left the province—she went to Linzhou, where there was an international paragliding base. She had seen it inadvertently on social media and came on the spur of the moment.

The first day, she just stood there watching, watching others paraglide. As she watched, she squatted down, then returned to the hotel.

The second day, she continued standing there watching and decided to give up and go home. Halfway there, she resolutely went back up and successfully paraglided with a coach’s accompaniment.

When the paragliding ended and she came down, her whole body collapsed sitting on the ground. She smoked two cigarettes hard before getting up. On the way back, she looked up at the high sky, thinking it was all just that—nothing more.

This experience, she never mentioned to anyone for the rest of her life. Including Feng Yiqun and Sun Jingcheng.

When she returned, everything was as usual. She first went to the family housing complex and helped Feng Yiqun bathe Grandma. In the evening, she carried her downstairs and pushed her around. This time Feng Yiqun accompanied her. She didn’t ask where she’d been, only saying that Sun Jingcheng had come over these past couple evenings… As she spoke, her phone rang—it was Sun Jingcheng calling, saying no one was home.

Feng Yiqun told him to wait a bit—they were heading back now.

Passing by the market, Feng Yiqun asked if they should buy groceries. Zhou Yu said sure and casually named a few dishes Sun Jingcheng liked. After buying them, they hung them on the wheelchair handles and slowly walked back.

Sun Jingcheng had nowhere to go, so he was pulled into chatting by people cooling off at the complex entrance, who asked why they weren’t having children. It’s hard to have babies when you’re older! Sun Jingcheng familiarly mixed in and grabbed some pumpkin seeds, asking the grandma who’d lost all her front teeth how she cracked them without front teeth.

Grandma taught him—it didn’t matter if the front teeth were gone, just use the back teeth at the corners of the mouth. Sun Jingcheng said the pumpkin seeds were fragrant. Grandma taught him how to scoop seeds out of pumpkins and roast them in a flat pan. Cracking and cracking, he got hungry. He went nearby and bought huoshao with vegetarian chicken—bought six, sat back down and ate with them.

Halfway through eating with his head down, someone called him, saying his mother-in-law and wife had returned. Sun Jingcheng looked up and went over. His first sentence to Zhou Yu was, “Why didn’t you say you were coming back?”

Feng Yiqun laughed at him, pointing at the groceries on the wheelchair handles. “She picked everything according to your tastes.”

Sun Jingcheng glanced at her and handed her the huoshao he was eating, telling her to bite the middle part—there was a tea egg there. Zhou Yu took a fierce bite, turned it over in her mouth a few times, swallowed and said, “This shop is still the best.”

Sun Jingcheng let her hold the huoshao, bent down to pick up Grandma and went upstairs. Feng Yiqun carried the groceries ahead to open the door. Zhou Yu folded up the wheelchair and followed.

Upstairs, Feng Yiqun went to the kitchen to work. Zhou Yu changed Grandma’s diaper, then applied baby powder on her leg creases, armpits, and neck. She also had Sun Jingcheng go to the balcony to pick two mint leaves and clip them behind Grandma’s ears.

After finishing and washing her hands, she pinched a piece of vegetarian chicken from the huoshao, broke off a tiny piece and put it in Grandma’s mouth. The old lady held it for a long time, and only swallowed after it lost flavor. Then she opened her mouth again.

Zhou Yu laughed heartily and asked Sun Jingcheng if he dared feed her more. Sun Jingcheng wouldn’t let her feed more, saying Grandma hadn’t had a bowel movement for two or three days. As he spoke, he picked up a soft banana and sat there feeding her.

The old lady still pursed her lips and wouldn’t eat.

…

Sun Jingcheng complained that she’d spoiled Grandma’s palate, saying to her, “You’re just being reckless. If she has trouble with bowel movements later, it’ll be troublesome.”

Zhou Yu didn’t mind. “She’ll lose her sense of taste soon. While she can still eat, let her eat a bit.” Then she pinched another piece of vegetarian chicken the size of a fingernail and negotiated with Grandma, “This is the last piece. After eating it, you must eat the banana.”

Grandma nodded and opened her mouth wide with an “Ah—”

Sun Jingcheng also laughed and let them be.

Then Zhou Yu came out, poured a glass of mint water to drink, found an apron to tie on and went to the kitchen to help. Feng Yiqun said it was hot and she didn’t need help. She didn’t say anything either, took a small scraper, and stood there calmly and patiently removing the raised fibers from the celery.

Sun Jingcheng watched the mother and daughter busy themselves. With nothing to do, he went downstairs to the pharmacy to buy an enema. Coming back, he saw that the old houses that had been covered in withered vines of climbing ivy before New Year’s were now lush and verdant. And those clearly visible footpads were still struggling to grow along the wall.

Ke Yu had been in Beijing for eight or nine days. Aside from reporting his safe arrival, mother and son hadn’t been in much contact. Sun Jingfei could get information from his social media updates every day, so naturally she wasn’t anxious.

Plus, Sun’s mother also tagged Ke Yu and Sun Yuyi in the group every day nagging—saying what’s there to see at the Great Wall? Aren’t you afraid of heatstroke? And saying what’s there to see at the Old Summer Palace, you’ll get sunburned to death? Nagging endlessly. Finally, Sun Youping couldn’t stand it anymore and told her to say less.

That night at twelve o’clock, she received a WeChat from Ke Yu: “Mom, are you asleep?”

Sun Jingfei replied, “No. Why aren’t you asleep either?”

Ke Yu replied, “Lots of mosquitoes in the dorm. Can’t sleep.”

Sun Jingfei asked, “No mosquito coils?”

Ke Yu replied, “Used them up yesterday.”

Sun Jingfei couldn’t help him and understood he wasn’t looking for a solution. She chatted with him: “How many people in the dorm?”

Ke Yu replied, “Just one, also working odd jobs here.”

Sun Jingfei asked, “Where do you go when Yuyi is working?”

Ke Yu replied, “I help her hand out flyers together. We finish distributing in the morning, then go everywhere to play in the afternoon. But every time I want to buy tickets for a scenic spot, Sister Yuyi has already bought them online.”

Sun Jingfei replied, “Let your Sister Yuyi buy them. I’ll give her a big red envelope at New Year’s.”

Ke Yu replied, “Okay, Mom.” Then another message: “I feel Sister Yuyi has matured a lot—very independent and has her own opinions. I’ve also met some people whose lives are very different from mine.”

Sun Jingfei asked, “How did you meet them?”

Ke Yu replied, “Sister Yuyi has a flyer distribution group with all kinds of people in it. I used to think a monthly salary of thirty to fifty thousand in Beijing was normal, but there are people making three to five thousand.”

[Sister Yuyi also has some schoolmates distributing flyers. Sometimes after distributing, everyone buys some cheap fruit to share, and some people treat us to ice cream. Even eating twelve-yuan boxed lunches, everyone is happy.]

[There are also some older people who don’t belong to our student group. When we buy fruit, we share it with them too, and they’re so happy and grateful… Some feelings I can’t express in words. I’m too young, without experience or credibility to express them to anyone.]

[This is the first time I’ve been in contact with so many complicated people, the first time I’ve truly felt pure kindness, hostility, and barriers between people. I used to think disadvantaged groups were all miserable—now I feel I was narrow-minded. These days I’ve been moved to think that maybe what each of us needs most isn’t success and wealth, but respect and recognition?]

[Like when Sister Yuyi took grapes to share with those uncles and aunties, they were especially grateful. I could clearly sense they weren’t grateful for being given grapes to eat, but grateful for being respected. Also like why I like Uncle and Aunt—because in front of them, what I say can be heard, what I do can be seen. They respect my feelings with dignity. Even if they don’t agree with my values.]

[When those uncles and aunties expressed gratitude to us, I felt especially uncomfortable. I wish I were a millionaire—then I’d have the ability to help them escape poverty.]

Sun Jingfei didn’t reply, just kept listening to him talk.

He said, “I suddenly understood what Uncle said to me—he said we can’t change others’ difficulties, but we must learn to respect people who are in difficulty. Because someday, we’ll also fall into difficulty…”

He said, “I have nothing to say about you and Dad separating. He didn’t just hurt your heart—he also hurt mine, and my heart will never heal. When you and Dad separate, you just need to divide assets, but I… you’ll never understand how guilty I feel toward Grandpa and Grandma. I won’t go back to see them often anymore. I can’t face their eyes. I feel… like something has been violently stripped from my body.”

[From now on, I’ll be like Sister Yuyi—work hard to become a qualified adult. Not become your burden, not make you worry.]