For ten consecutive days, Lu Tong stayed at the Wang Manor of Wen County.

Though the poison in the newborn girl’s body had not been completely expelled, since she was separated from her mother’s body, the toxicity no longer spread. With gradual medication and nurturing in the days ahead, recovery might not be impossible.

Pei Yunshu was also gradually getting better.

Whatever Pei Yunying had done, during these ten days, no outsiders entered Pei Yunshu’s courtyard – not even the Prince of Wen County could enter.

Once mother and daughter were temporarily out of danger, Lu Tong returned briefly to West Street.

Du Changqing hadn’t seen Lu Tong since Mid-Autumn Festival. Although he had heard about what happened from Yin Zheng, he remained anxious. Only when he saw Lu Tong return safe and sound did the weight finally lift from his heart.

Lu Tong changed into a clean plain white gauze dress, freshened up, and when she lifted the curtain, she was met with Du Changqing’s long face.

The owner paced circles in the shop while scolding: “I always knew that Pei fellow was bad luck, but I didn’t expect him to be this unlucky. You just went to deliver some medicine, and even that could lead to such trouble. You’re young and don’t understand – don’t be fooled by how proper these noble families look, they’re actually full of scandals.” He sighed again with a worried expression, “Don’t end up getting nothing but trouble in return.”

Lu Tong interrupted him, “Did anything happen at the medical hall while I was away?”

Du Changqing started, then slapped his forehead: “Right, I almost forgot…”

Before he could finish speaking, someone suddenly called out “Doctor Lu” at the medical hall’s entrance.

Lu Tong looked up to see a man wearing an old plain robe and cyan square headcloth standing at the door, carrying several blue carp, looking at her with a shy smile.

It was Wu Youcai.

Du Changqing leaned close to Lu Tong’s ear and whispered: “This Scholar Wu has come looking for you several times since his return from death. You weren’t here the previous times. I was just about to tell you about this when he arrived with perfect timing.”

The scholar walked into the inner shop, somewhat embarrassedly lifting the fish in his hand, “For the Mid-Autumn Festival gift, I wanted to bring Doctor Lu some fish. I heard from A’cheng that Doctor Lu was out making house calls, and only returned today.”

Yin Zheng hurriedly took the blue carp and didn’t forget to pull Du Changqing and A’cheng into the small courtyard behind the door, only saying to Lu Tong: “Miss, the medicinal herbs drying in the courtyard haven’t been sorted yet. We’ll go sort them first, you can come help after you finish talking with Brother Wu.”

Du Changqing turned his head to give Lu Tong and Wu a suspicious look, but ultimately said nothing and followed Yin Zheng into the small courtyard.

The felt curtain fell, leaving only Lu Tong and Wu Youcai in the inner shop.

Lu Tong stood by the counter, looking over the person before her.

Wu Youcai still had that humble scholar’s appearance, his clothes old but neat, just as poor as when they first met, yet still pulling out loose silver from a money pouch that had been mended many times.

A scholar in dire straits, yet maintaining his dignity without being either servile or arrogant.

Wu Youcai was also looking at Lu Tong.

It was a fine day, with sunlight slanting in from across the street, illuminating a small patch of the dim inner shop. The young female doctor bathed in this small patch of gold, warm and gentle, less cold and distant than usual, like a ray of light suddenly appearing in darkness, a merciful and gentle bodhisattva.

Her expression was calm, her gaze at him showing not the slightest alarm – even though at this time, he should have been a “dead man.”

“Did Doctor Lu know early on that I would return from death?” After a long while, Wu Youcai asked softly.

When she saw him, she was so calm, completely different from others’ fear, as if she had long known this scene would appear before her.

Lu Tong didn’t answer his question, only asking: “Are you feeling any discomfort?”

Wu Youcai shook his head.

Ten days ago, when he awoke from the black coffin, he was nearly frightened to death by the group of scholars who had come to keep vigil at his spirit hall. Master Hu even fainted straight away – the black coffin prepared for him almost had to be used for someone else.

After everyone’s ghost-like wailing, they invited Old Blind He from West Street to come to catch ghosts and subdue evil spirits. Old He looked at him from afar, waved his peach wood sword around while muttering incantations, then stroked his beard and sighed deeply, saying the Wu family’s good deeds had accumulated great karmic merit, and since his predestined lifespan wasn’t over, the King of Hell had made an exception and ordered minor ghost officials to quickly return him to the world of the living.

Led by Elder Xun, the poetry society members were sincerely happy for him. Old He took his payment and threw in several talismans to ward off bad luck. Wu Youcai stood among the gong-beating and drum-banging crowd, feeling only confused and absurd.

He had died – he still remembered the moment he swallowed the poison in the examination hall, the intense pain spreading gradually from his heart, like a drowning person unable to grasp the last floating log, only able to watch himself sink inch by inch into darkness, boundless terror rushing in from all sides, howling to drag him into an even deeper hell.

In that instant, he had a fear of death and a desire for life.

He regretted it at that moment.

But the arrow had left the bow – how could he turn back? His last memory before death was of himself howling and struggling madly on the ground of the examination hall, all scholarly dignity completely gone, like being naked while others watched his death throes.

Who would have thought that when he woke up, he would see white funeral banners and yellow paper everywhere, hear Master Hu’s familiar panicked shouting outside, and the poetry society members’ terrified yelling – amid the chaos, he stood in the black coffin wearing new long robes, staring dazedly at the golden early sun above, as if newborn.

He had come back to life.

Wu Youcai looked at Lu Tong.

The woman stood in the medicine shop, lowering her head to arrange scattered medical books. Back then when storm clouds were gathering, she had appeared in his mother’s spirit hall, her words bewitching, her tone cold, like an ill-intentioned ghost bride. But now in this warm sunlight, the small medicine shop quiet and clean, she stood there with gentle eyes, actually creating a sense of peaceful times.

Wu Youcai said softly: “Why did Doctor Lu give me a fake death drug… was it because you guessed I would use it on myself?”

At that time, she had given Wu Youcai the poison, suggesting he could poison the chief examiner of the imperial examination, but in the end, Wu Youcai backed down. He ultimately couldn’t bring himself to kill someone, so he used the drug on himself, with a tragic determination to perish together.

But he hadn’t died.

Wu Youcai didn’t take Old He’s nonsense seriously at all. The only person he could think of was Lu Tong.

Lu Tong had tampered with the medicine.

But why had she done this? Had she already guessed he would take his own life? How was that possible, after all, even he hadn’t anticipated the decision to end his life at first.

Lu Tong casually flipped through the medical book beside her hand, saying coolly: “Didn’t I say? If it were me, I would kill him.”

“But you’re not me.”

Wu Youcai was startled.

Lu Tong looked up at him, smiling slightly: “But you’re not me.”

Wu Youcai was not her.

This scholar was honest and sincere, like most poor common people in the world, swallowing their grievances and blood when wronged. He wasn’t like her – vengeful, cold-hearted and vicious. A man who read the sages’ books, a poor fish seller who wouldn’t take an extra coin from poor old women – wasn’t it too cruel to ask him to kill someone he had never met?

She hadn’t anticipated Wu Youcai would take his own life, merely feeling that if Wu Youcai killed someone, leaving aside how the authorities would later deal with it, just the endless guilt and moral torment would be enough to make this honest man unable to go on living.

She had used him but didn’t want to cause his death.

Lu Tong asked: “What about you then, do you still want to die? What are your plans for the future?”

Wu Youcai was silent for a moment.

Perhaps because the earlier emotional experience of death had been too profound, after Wu Youcai “came back to life,” he lay in bed thinking about many things.

He thought about his parents’ hopes for him in childhood, about these years of studying in the cold window light and failing year after year, about Old He telling him “Young master will surely become an official in the future.” He thought about many, many things, and finally, looking through the window at the remains of colored tassels scattered all over the courtyard, he recalled what Elder Xun later told him about how on the night of the vigil, the poetry society members had specially performed “The Old Scholar Becomes Number One Scholar at Eighty” for him.

It was a comedy with a happy ending, yet although wishes were fulfilled, it still made Elder Xun weep.

An official title was just a golden shadow floating in the air, looking bright and beautiful, but unknowingly costing how many people their entire lives.

Wu Youcai pulled back his thoughts and looked at the woman before him.

He said: “I won’t take the examinations anymore.”

“Why?”

Wu Youcai smiled slightly: “Actually, I came today to bid farewell to Doctor Lu.”

Lu Tong was startled.

“There’s a cloth shop owner outside the city who wants to hire a tutor for his six-year-old daughter and asked Old Master Hu to find someone. Old Master Hu gave him my name card. From now on, I’ll be teaching at his home. There are about ten taels of silver per year, enough for me to live on.”

When he spoke of these things, his expression relaxed considerably, as if he had figured out many things overnight, no longer shrouded in the gloom as when they first met, becoming more carefree and light-hearted.

Lu Tong was silent for a long while before saying: “That’s good too.”

The Ministry of Rites had been shaken up and down by this incident, and Wu Youcai, though an insignificant figure, was after all the source that started everything. Although all those involved had been imprisoned and no one would seek revenge against him, if he were to take the examinations again in the future, Wu Youcai would inevitably be brought up as an example.

This place held too much pain for him now.

Wu Youcai looked at Lu Tong: “What about Doctor Lu?”

Lu Tong paused.

Wu Youcai gazed at the person before him.

Actually, at this point, what Lu Tong’s purpose was in using him no longer mattered. Regardless, she had helped fulfill his final wish.

Now that the examination fraud had been exposed, all the powerful nobles who had oppressed the scholars had been punished. After his return from death, he had been thoroughly examined by several coroners from the Ministry of Justice, who found nothing amiss and all marveled at the miracle. So he just went along with Old He’s explanation about “the King of Hell releasing him,” not wanting to cause any more trouble for Lu Tong.

He was grateful to her, grateful that she had cruelly torn away the truth for him to see in this muddled world, grateful that she had found him a way to live. Even more grateful for that fake death drug, which had let him experience attachment to life at death’s door, and given him a chance to turn back.

Born anew.

Perhaps the Wu Scholar of West Street’s fish market who had futilely pursued official rank was already dead, and this one who survived was the real Wu Youcai – the one he wanted to be.

The inner shop was silent for a long time.

After a while, Wu Youcai’s voice sounded.

“Whatever Doctor Lu wants to do, Youcai only wishes Doctor Lu all the best, and that your wishes come true.”

The words were spoken from the heart, sincere and genuine.

In this world, each person has their path, each person has their hardships – no need to probe, no need to inquire. He only needed to know that Lu Tong was the hand that reached out to him in desperate straits, a female bodhisattva who saved him from suffering and difficulty – that was enough.

“I am grateful for your kind words.”

Lu Tong raised her head, smiling as she looked at him: “I also wish you, sir, no more hardships in the future, that you may know all the good people in the world, read all the good books in the world, and see all the good mountains and waters in the world.”

When she said these words to him, though she was smiling, her gaze held a faint melancholy, as if she was seeing someone else’s shadow through him, always with a touch of sorrow.

Wu Youcai was startled, then burst into hearty laughter. He had always been elegant and reserved, rarely laughing so genuinely from the heart. Then he composed himself and gave Lu Tong a deep, solemn bow.

“Thank you, Doctor Lu.”

He took his leave, his figure no longer humble and stooped as usual, but instead relaxed and graceful. His faded white robe hem fluttered in the autumn wind, brilliant and dazzling in the golden sun, actually showing something of a young man’s unrestrained manner.

Lu Tong gazed long at his retreating figure, until the sun’s scattered light beneath the plum tree at the door no longer flickered, until her eyes grew sore from watching, and Du Changqing’s voice came from behind.

His tone was peculiar, “Why such reluctance to part? Anyone who didn’t know better would think he was your brother.”

Lu Tong pulled back her thoughts, but he persisted, “Today when you saw Scholar Wu return from death, you weren’t surprised at all – didn’t you know about it beforehand?”

“Yes, I heard about it at the Prince’s manor.”

Du Changqing sneered: “Just heard about it? His return from death – wasn’t that you’re doing?”

Lu Tong remained unmoved: “Didn’t he say himself? His predestined lifespan wasn’t over, the King of Hell doesn’t take good people – I don’t have that ability.”

“Since when is the King of Hell so fair? Even more reasonable than mortal officials – that old kidnapper woman on West Street who specialized in abducting girls lived to ninety-eight, why didn’t they drag her down?”

He was unusually astute this time, sticking close to Lu Tong, “Stop fooling this young master, what secrets do you two have that I, the owner, can’t hear? I want to know right now!”

Lu Tong was thoroughly annoyed. Yin Zheng and A’cheng came out from the courtyard, put down the winnowing basket of drying medicines, and grabbed Du Changqing’s sleeve: “Master, didn’t you say that when Miss returned we’d go eat at Renhe Restaurant? When will you arrange it?”

Hearing this, Du Changqing’s body shook: “Right, I almost forgot the important matter!”

On the fifteenth, he had arranged for a banquet at Renhe Restaurant, but then Lu Tong went to the Prince’s manor for ten days, forcing him to temporarily cancel the feast. However, the deposit for booking the feast wasn’t refundable. Manager Du had haggled with them for a long time before the owner finally agreed to let him come back another time when he was free to have the full feast served.

Now that Lu Tong had finally returned, this hard-won meal could at last be eaten.

He said: “Everyone’s here now, quickly, pick a time to have the feast. How about tomorrow?”

Lu Tong lifted the felt curtain: “Wait a few more days.”

“Still waiting?” Du Changqing was speechless, saying irritably, “Go or don’t go, suit yourself!”

Lu Tong ignored his nagging and went straight to the small courtyard.

The small courtyard was still as clean as when she left it. Yin Zheng loved cleanliness and swept it daily. Lu Tong entered the room, walked to the small Buddhist shrine, and took out several sticks of incense to light them.

In the curling smoke, the small Buddha statue lowered its eyes, its face compassionate.

She spoke softly, whether to herself or others was unclear.

“Soon…”

“Just a few more days.”

[May you know all the good people in the world, read all the good books in the world, and see all the good mountains and waters in the world — from “Small Window’s Secluded Notes”]