On this day, Jiang Li didn’t know how she made it back to the Jiang residence. It seemed everyone was trying to console her, saying Ji Heng would surely return. For now, they simply couldn’t locate his whereabouts, but for some reason, Jiang Li’s heart refused to settle. Those words of comfort brushed past her ears, unable to soothe her even a little bit.
The Jiang family still didn’t know about Ji Heng’s news, nor did they know what had happened to Jiang Li, assuming everything was as usual. But Tong’er and Baixue knew the truth. When they brought Jiang Li back, Wenren Yao had specifically instructed the two maids to take good care of Jiang Li, to keep her company and talk with her, and above all not to let Jiang Li be alone with her anxious thoughts.
Tong’er and Baixue served Jiang Li with utmost care. They thought Jiang Li would cry, would grieve alone, might even fall ill because of this, but after returning to the Jiang residence, Jiang Li actually became strong. She went about doing the things she would normally do as if nothing had happened. At least on the surface, she seemed no different from before.
But the anxiety and worry in her heart grew more severe with each passing day.
One day passed, two days passed, ten days passed… a month passed. The waiting became increasingly hopeless, and still no news came of Ji Heng. At first, Kong Liu would try to find ways to console Jiang Li, but later, each time Jiang Li went to the Duke’s manor to ask for news, Kong Liu didn’t dare look her in the eye. From Kong Liu’s eyes, Jiang Li could see helplessness and sighs.
Situ Jiuyue and the others initially firmly believed that Ji Heng would definitely return, but as time grew longer and longer, when winter began to fall in Yanjing City, when thick white snow accumulated on the ground, when deep winter had arrived and still no news came, even Situ Jiuyue began to fall silent.
Jiang Li had once overheard a conversation between Situ Jiuyue and Kong Liu.
Situ Jiuyue said, “There’s still no news of Ji Heng. What’s really going on? Is Lu Ji genuinely searching earnestly for his whereabouts?”
“He truly is. Winter has come to Qimin as well, with heavy snow sealing the mountains and wild beasts roaming about. These past days, Lu Ji has been searching everywhere in the mountains without a moment’s rest…” His voice lowered, “Before, when Second Miss Jiang was here, I really couldn’t say this, but those Yin family soldier prisoners said that when the Lord escaped, he was gravely wounded. Even if he could escape, he might not survive. Finding one person in such vast mountains is already extremely difficult. But if the Lord were still alive, he would surely find a way to rendezvous with Lu Ji and the others. The mountains of Qimin are completely uninhabited—he couldn’t possibly be hiding.”
Situ Jiuyue said coldly, “What are you trying to say? That Ji Heng’s fate is grim?”
“I don’t want anything to happen to the Lord.” Kong Liu sounded like he too had become angry. “If I had been in the mountains at that time, even if it cost me my life, I would have protected the Lord’s safety! But now this is the reality. I’m only telling you the most likely situation.”
There was a very long silence before Situ Jiuyue’s voice came again. “Life and death are fated. People like you and me have long grown accustomed to seeing life and death. No matter how powerful Ji Heng is, in the end he’s still an ordinary person. But… if he truly can’t return, what about Jiang Li?”
“Second Miss Jiang?”
“Yes. She’s devoted herself wholeheartedly to following Ji Heng. I think if Ji Heng truly can’t return, she’ll just keep waiting like this forever. None of us can do anything about it. For her, for Ji Heng, that’s where the true tragedy lies.”
Standing behind the bushes, hearing Situ Jiuyue’s cruel words, Jiang Li couldn’t help but feel a trace of sorrow rise in her heart. Even Situ Jiuyue believed this was a tragedy? That her meeting with Ji Heng was destined never to reach a good ending?
Could Ji Heng truly not return? She thought in a daze. This news came so vaguely, so unreal. What surfaced in her mind were various images of Ji Heng—Ji Heng smiling as he listened to opera in the tavern, Ji Heng matching wits with her step by step, Ji Heng showing helplessness toward her, gentle Ji Heng, and on that spring night, beyond the wall, Ji Heng when they first met.
Their lives, entangled across two lifetimes, bound by deep ties—were they now at this crucial juncture to be separated? To sever their previous connection? Jiang Li’s gaze became resolute. She absolutely would not agree. Even if she were alone, she would maintain their relationship. In the life that belonged to Jiang Li, there would never be a second Ji Heng. Even if Ji Heng was no more, no one could replace his position.
Jiang Li didn’t continue listening and turned to leave.
…
This year’s winter in Yanjing City was especially cold. The wind blowing in from outside the window could almost pierce into one’s bones. After the Yin family soldiers struggled to survive for a period, the remnant troops finally couldn’t hold out and surrendered completely. Yin Zhili was dead, and the remaining people couldn’t amount to anything. The Jinwu Army achieved a great victory, and after years of silence, their reputation resounded loudly once more.
But this war wasn’t as easy as people had imagined. Only those truly in the midst of it knew the cruelty of war. The Yin family soldiers suffered this way, and the Jinwu Army also suffered heavy casualties. Most importantly, Ji Heng, who led the Jinwu Army, had likely died on the battlefield.
When the common people of Yanjing City received this news, they all sighed endlessly. The previous rumors about the Duke of Su instantly dissipated because of his death. His past personality and beauty instead added a touch of poignant beauty to his life. Storytellers in taverns began telling stories about the Duke of Su, and in those tale books, Ji Heng completely changed from his former dark image, becoming selfless, brave, and generous.
People are always like this, understanding things based on what their own eyes see, as if they deeply comprehend the underlying truth. As rumors about Ji Heng spread through the streets and alleys, Jiang Li was also brought up and discussed. They said this Second Miss Jiang had an unfortunate fate—previously engaged to Zhou Yanbang of the Marquis Ningyuan’s manor, only to have the engagement taken by her sister. Now engaged to Ji Heng, yet Ji Heng died on the battlefield. Some sympathized, some mocked, and others spread rumors, saying perhaps Second Miss Jiang was destined to be alone her entire life, which was why every engagement ended without result. If she had a husband-cursing fate, she’d best become a nun sooner rather than later, lest she implicate others.
Rumors flew thick and fast throughout the capital, and the Jiang family also heard them. Jiang Yuanbai, unusually, came to inquire with Jiang Li, asking, “Little Li, you’ve also heard those rumors outside. If you continue to stay in Yanjing City, I’m afraid it won’t be good for your reputation. In any case, your Second Uncle and I have already resigned from office, and before long we’ll take Youyao to Yongzhou for treatment. If you don’t want to stay in Yanjing City, we can depart earlier and leave this place.”
His words actually carried a few traces of genuine concern. Jiang Yuanbai knew that Jiang Li truly liked Ji Heng, and Ji Heng’s death was undoubtedly a huge blow to Jiang Li. Other people’s gossip was practically adding frost to snow. How much harm rumors could do to a person—Jiang Li had already experienced it many years ago. He had already wronged Jiang Li once and truly couldn’t bear to see Jiang Li suffer unwarranted accusations again for something that wasn’t her fault. If escape was also a solution, then there was nothing shameful about it.
“Thank you, Father,” Jiang Li said. “I don’t plan to leave Yanjing City. I still need to wait here for Ji Heng to return.”
Jiang Yuanbai frowned. “He’s already dead.”
“But we haven’t seen a body, have we?” Jiang Li smiled slightly and said calmly, “So he’s not necessarily dead. Others don’t want to continue searching, but I feel he hasn’t died yet. He hasn’t completed what he promised me, and before the promise is fulfilled, I’ll wait here for him to return.”
In Jiang Li’s heart, from beginning to end, from detestable to gentle, there was one thing about Ji Heng’s temperament that had never changed—what he promised, he would definitely do; what he agreed to, he would definitely fulfill. This could be seen from the very beginning, when she and Ji Heng first made their first transaction.
She believed that this time too, Ji Heng would return. Everyone had heard the story of Weisheng embracing the pillar. Others thought she was foolish, infatuated once and infatuated a second time, but when emotions surged like the sea, inherently bitter and boundless, Weisheng was certainly foolish, but wasn’t he himself willing until the very last moment?
Her waiting for Ji Heng was just like this.
Jiang Yuanbai gazed at Jiang Li for a long time, finally heaving a deep sigh. He seemed to have compromised, completely compromised, saying, “Since that’s the case, then you stay in Yanjing City.”
He truly had no way to deal with Jiang Li, and the determination and stubbornness in Jiang Li’s eyes at that moment couldn’t help but move him. It was as if persuading Jiang Li to give up waiting would be an utterly unforgivable crime.
He was at a complete loss.
…
On the tenth day of the twelfth month, the Jinwu Army returned triumphantly to the capital. On the road back to the capital, common people lined both sides of the street in enthusiastic welcome and cheers. Among those soldiers, many had died on the battlefield, forever remaining beneath the yellow earth. Those who returned alive became heroes and should receive the glory they deserved.
Jiang Li also stood among the watching crowd. She looked at the long procession, her heart full of expectation that from the end of the line, a familiar figure in red would appear, and Ji Heng would still walk over with a smile as before, unconcerned as always, as carefree as ever.
She waited from the first person in the procession to the last person walking past, yet never saw Ji Heng’s figure, and so her gaze finally dimmed. No miracle appeared. He truly hadn’t returned—at least for now, he hadn’t returned.
Tong’er looked at her with concern and asked, “Miss, are you alright?”
Jiang Li shook her head and said, “I’m fine. Let’s go to the Duke’s manor.”
Today Lu Ji should also have returned. Only Lu Ji would know the clearest information about Ji Heng. Jiang Li wanted to see Lu Ji, to at least know what the situation had been that day.
Tong’er and Baixue exchanged glances. They didn’t want Jiang Li to go to the Duke’s manor at this moment, fearing it would make her think of the person upon seeing his belongings. But Jiang Li’s attitude was resolute. They had no choice but to accompany Jiang Li there.
When they arrived at the Duke’s manor, the manor entrance was quiet. If Ji Heng had returned today, this place would surely be somewhat lively. Jiang Li greeted the gatekeeper and walked in. Upon entering the manor and walking to the courtyard, she saw Zhao Ke and Wen Ji after a long time.
Zhao Ke saw Jiang Li first and said, “Second Miss.”
Jiang Li walked over. Nearly a year had passed since they last met, and Zhao Ke and Wen Ji also looked much more haggard. Wen Ji’s face now bore several more scars, showing that the battlefield fighting had been extremely fierce. Zhao Ke didn’t quite dare look into Jiang Li’s eyes and didn’t take the initiative to speak. Jiang Li then spoke, “Ji Heng… truly didn’t return?”
Wen Ji gently shook his head, his tone carrying a trace of dejection. “It’s my failure to protect the Lord well.”
“What exactly happened that day?” Jiang Li asked. “I’ve only heard the facts from others’ mouths, which may not be entirely accurate. Since you were by his side, naturally you know most clearly.”
“When the Lord was contending with Yin Zhili, his old injury flared up. Yin Zhili’s deputy general struck the Lord at his previous wound, and only then was the Lord outmatched. At that time, the Lord went alone to pursue Yin Zhili. We still didn’t know the Lord’s condition. Later… when we found those prisoners, they said the Lord had escaped, but they also said the Lord was gravely wounded and couldn’t go far. We searched the surrounding area for a long time but couldn’t find any trace of the Lord. Later, Master Lu ordered people to search the mountain, but there was still no trace. Until… until…”
Wen Ji wasn’t a hesitant person, but what he said next seemed impossible for him to continue. He stammered. Jiang Li’s heart tightened, and she couldn’t help but press, “Until what?”
Wen Ji glanced at Jiang Li. He took something from his sleeve and spread it open in his palm. Jiang Li saw it was a butterfly fan ornament, but only half remained—it had apparently broken, leaving half a bare butterfly wing, the red jade clearly cracked.
Jiang Li’s hand trembled as she reached out and took the butterfly. This familiar fan ornament no longer had its former beautiful appearance and could no longer dance gracefully with that gorgeous fan.
“We found this in the mountains. Master Lu recognized it as the Lord’s fan ornament and had us search that area. We found… we found…” A grown man, yet at this moment Wen Ji’s voice also choked up. “We found the Lord’s armor and clothing, as well as bloodstains… By that time a long while had passed. People in the army said the Lord might have been… torn apart and devoured by wolves and dogs.”
Jiang Li’s vision went black and she nearly fainted. Tong’er cried out in alarm and quickly supported her. Before Jiang Li’s eyes was nothing but the image surfacing in the deep mountains—that red armor covered in bloodstains, spreading out into terrifying traces on the ground. That prophecy, that curse-like prophecy echoed in her ears again: “Due to a woman’s misfortune, he will meet calamity, his corpse exposed in the wilderness, pecked and eaten by hawks and hounds.”
It had all come true.
Jiang Li murmured, “I harmed him.”
Tong’er said anxiously, “Miss, this has nothing to do with you. Don’t take all the blame upon yourself.”
“No, it is my fault. I caused him to meet calamity. If that day Yin Zhili hadn’t used me to lure him into a trap, he wouldn’t have been injured… I harmed him.” She closed her eyes in pain, tears streaming down.
“The Lord never thought this way,” Zhao Ke said. “Second Miss Jiang, to the Lord, you are the most important. You must not torment yourself.”
They had followed Ji Heng for so many years. Rather than master and servants, they were more like brothers who shared life and death. Regarding Ji Heng’s departure, they too felt anguished, but they couldn’t blame Jiang Li for it. When all was said and done, it was fate playing tricks—it just happened to be at that time that Ji Heng’s old ailment recurred.
“Before departing for battle, the Lord mentioned that if he couldn’t return from this campaign… in the future, the Duke’s manor would be entrusted to Second Miss to manage. Whether Second Miss wants to sell it, keep it, or do other things with it, everything will be decided by Second Miss. In Yanjing City, the Lord has no relatives. Second Miss is the Lord’s final attachment. Everything he could leave behind, he will give entirely to Second Miss.”
Jiang Li smiled miserably. What was this? Was this arranging all his family wealth before dying? Should she praise Ji Heng for having great foresight, arranging everything in advance? Those people in Yanjing City would probably start envying her again. Even though Ji Heng had died, he still left her such a vast fortune. But heaven knew she would rather use all her wealth to exchange for Ji Heng’s safe return. She hoped Ji Heng’s arrangements would never need to be fulfilled, because that would mean she still had a chance to wait for his return, to wait for the day he fulfilled his promise.
“What does Second Miss plan to do in the future?” Zhao Ke asked softly. “The Lord said that if he’s not here, Second Miss would be our master. Whatever arrangements Second Miss has for us, you may decide.”
Jiang Li steadied herself. The grief in her heart almost crushed her in an instant, but she knew now was not yet the time for solitary sorrow. Many things remained unresolved. Ji Heng’s former enemies would take this opportunity to devour the Duke’s manor completely. Regarding the title, regarding other matters, Emperor Hongxiao might protect Ji Heng out of remembrance of his loyalty, but how long an emperor’s trust could last, no one could say clearly. Most importantly, those opponents would stop at nothing, using any means necessary to achieve their goals, including making an issue of Ji Heng’s death.
She couldn’t help Ji Heng on the battlefield, but in Yanjing City, she must do everything in her power to protect the Duke’s manor. Even if there were no more of Ji Heng’s relatives in this Duke’s manor, this residence was where Ji Heng grew up since childhood. She couldn’t just watch it be taken away by others.
“I have no plans, nor do I plan to go anywhere. What you worry about won’t happen.” Jiang Li clenched her fists tightly—only this way could she prevent her tears from flowing uncontrollably, prevent herself from completely breaking down. She said, “I’ll find a way to complete the wedding ceremony. Even if there’s only one person, I’ll stay and guard this place. I ask that you also join me in guarding Ji Heng’s home.”
She said with sorrow and determination, “This is his only home.”
Wen Ji and Zhao Ke exchanged glances, then knelt on one knee before Jiang Li in salute. This was the ritual between master and servant. They seemed to have completely set their hearts at ease, wholeheartedly trusting Jiang Li, saying respectfully, “Yes, Miss.”
…
In the imperial palace, Emperor Hongxiao walked to the cold palace where the Empress Dowager lived.
In the bitter cold, there wasn’t even a brazier lit here. Upon entering, one felt as if the entire body were immersed in ice. The courtyard grew increasingly lifeless. The eaves stretched long, revealing only a faint glimmer of daylight. Walking here was like being in a prison.
This was indeed a prison.
Eunuch Su stood to one side, carefully instructing guards to carry over a rosewood chest and open the door for Emperor Hongxiao, bringing the chest inside.
A foul odor emanated from the room. Even Eunuch Su couldn’t help but wrinkle his nose. Emperor Hongxiao’s gaze shifted slightly as he ordered someone to light a lamp. The room was pitch black, the curtains pulled tightly shut, nothing visible. Only after a faint lamplight brightened could everyone see inside clearly.
At the foot of the bed, a person was curled up. She was wrapped in a cotton quilt. The floor was full of filth, perhaps even bloodstains. She seemed extremely averse to light. Sensing the brightness, she quickly drew her head back in. That was, until Emperor Hongxiao said, “Lin Roujia.”
Lin Roujia raised her head, her gaze confused as she looked at him. Emperor Hongxiao was also slightly surprised.
He knew this woman’s nature was vicious and resolute. When he had thrown her here, no matter how poor the conditions, she had never wavered. She still maintained the lofty airs of an Empress Dowager, even keeping herself impeccably groomed, still as proud as before. Emperor Hongxiao had been quite vexed, even thinking he needed to use other methods to torment the Empress Dowager. Just making the Empress Dowager feel guilty and regretful in her own heart—that would likely be impossible in this lifetime. She was truly too selfish.
However, since Jiang Li entered the palace to see Lin Roujia last time, things had changed. The people guarding the door outside reported that the Empress Dowager suddenly became dispirited. Several times she had even tried to use mirror shards to commit suicide. Emperor Hongxiao had people watch the Empress Dowager carefully, not allowing her to die immediately. Those people said the Empress Dowager was now a completely different person, as if something she had always believed in throughout her life had collapsed, unable to support herself any longer. Moreover, she looked extremely pained every day. When she was lucid, she did only one thing—seek death.
Emperor Hongxiao had removed from the room everything the Empress Dowager might use to commit suicide. Thus, she truly could neither live nor die as she wished.
“Your… Majesty…” Lin Roujia murmured. She could barely make out the Emperor’s features. In the faint lamplight, the youth who had once been weak and needed to curry favor with her had grown into a towering emperor—unfathomable in thought, strong in methods—who would decisively imprison her here.
Those of the imperial family who could live to occupy this position were indeed never soft-hearted.
Lin Roujia briefly regained lucidity. No matter what, when facing Emperor Hongxiao, she was unwilling to appear inferior. She was about to utter some sarcastic remarks when suddenly her gaze fell upon that huge rosewood chest. For some reason, her gaze was drawn to the chest and couldn’t move away, as if there were some treasure inside that made it impossible to tear her eyes away.
Emperor Hongxiao followed her gaze and smiled, saying, “Today I’ve come to bring you a gift.” He waved his hand. “Come, open the chest.”
Two guards approached, pushed the chest before Lin Roujia, and opened it.
Lin Roujia looked inside.
In that rosewood chest, gold velvet cloth had been laid, as if holding precious gifts. However, upon the velvet, two severed heads lay side by side. Blood dripped from the neck stumps, yet the faces had been wiped clean of filth, making the features clearly recognizable. One person was Yin Zhan, the other was Yin Zhili.
After the Empress Dowager saw clearly who the two people before her were, she screamed “No—!” She lunged forward, took out the heads, and held them in her arms. Already severed from their bodies, naturally they couldn’t possibly live again. Yet she acted as if she still hoped to revive these two people, suddenly bursting into wailing cries, saying, “Azhan! Zhili!”
But regrettably, whether Yin Zhan or Yin Zhili, both had their eyes tightly closed and could no longer respond to her cries.
“The Yin family soldiers were defeated, the Jinwu Army returned triumphantly to the capital—these are the fruits of war. I thought that since you were once an Empress Dowager of a nation, such joyous national events should be shared with you as well. I specially brought them for you to see. How about it?” Emperor Hongxiao said with a smile, his words spoken through gritted teeth.
He had finally seen the Empress Dowager weeping bitterly, her heart full of regret. This woman’s heart was hard as iron. No matter what happened, she always treated it with cold indifference. Emperor Hongxiao was also human. He too had a vengeful heart. Back then, the Empress Dowager caused Noble Consort Xia’s early death and filled his youth with darkness. He too hoped to let the Empress Dowager taste the flavor of suffering.
And Lin Roujia had probably truly loved Yin Zhan. She held Yin Zhan’s head in her arms, not at all disgusted by the strange odor on it, nor did she find it terrifying. She held it tightly in her embrace, as if afraid someone would snatch it away. She even kissed Yin Zhan’s ice-cold lips, crying as she said, “Azhan… Azhan… don’t leave me…”
This horrifying scene, falling upon everyone’s eyes, made them all feel somewhat chilled. Lin Roujia cried and cried, then suddenly said, “Your Majesty, kill me!”
“Oh?” Emperor Hongxiao raised his eyebrows. “Why should I kill you?”
“Back then, I harmed your Imperial Concubine Mother. I also caused the deaths of Yu Hongye and Ji Minghan. I have deep enmity with you. I beg you, let me die!” The Empress Dowager wept incessantly, tears and mucus flowing freely, no longer showing any trace of her former carefree demeanor in the Buddhist hall. She was truly despondent now. Yin Zhan was already dead, and Yin Zhili was already dead. In this world, the only two people she loved, the only ones she had feelings for, were both dead. What meaning was there in her continued existence? There would never be another day when she could turn things around. She could only endure torment day after day in this sunless hell.
How could she be separated from Yin Zhan? Not even in death could she bear it.
The Empress Dowager kowtowed continuously to the Emperor. This was something that would never have happened in years past. She would only maintain her lofty position, using words of apparent praise but hidden criticism, sentence by sentence tormenting and piercing the young Emperor.
Emperor Hongxiao watched her coldly, then suddenly said, “Second Miss from the Jiang residence also asked me to send you a gift.”
Eunuch Su took something from his bosom, walked smiling to Lin Roujia’s front, and placed the object before Lin Roujia. Lin Roujia first froze, then screamed loudly, laughing and crying madly at the same time.
What Eunuch Su held was precisely a bronze mirror. That mirror very clearly reflected Lin Roujia’s current disheveled appearance with matted hair, dirty face, and completely unrecognizable features. Emperor Hongxiao said coolly, “Lin Roujia, with such ugliness as yours, when you reach the underworld, how could Yin Zhan be willing to acknowledge you? In my view, you’d best live well and give Yin Zhan a way out.”
These mocking words had reached the extreme of viciousness. Lin Roujia suddenly reached out to claw at her own face. These days, no one had trimmed her nails, and they had already grown long and sharp. With this one clawing, many bloody marks immediately appeared, yet she seemed completely unaware, as if she didn’t know pain. Soon her face became a bloody mess.
Emperor Hongxiao turned around, as if unwilling to look at her another moment, ordering with disgust in his voice, “Watch her carefully. Don’t let her die.” He walked out of the door.
Eunuch Su followed closely behind. The door was closed, and from within came faint sounds of a woman’s crazed howling, half crying, half laughing.
Only after walking far away, reaching the Imperial Garden, did those sounds from behind completely disappear. Emperor Hongxiao looked into the distance and gently exhaled.
His inner knot had finally been untied. Even if what the Emperor did seemed really not magnanimous enough, if the inner knot from his youth wasn’t untied, it would trouble him for life. From now on, he could finally be at ease as the master of the Northern Yan realm. As for that weak youth from the past who needed to curry favor and please others, he would disappear into memory from this point forward, never to appear again.
Eunuch Su handed the hand warmer to the Emperor. Warmth came from his palm. Emperor Hongxiao thought of those words Jiang Li asked Ye Shijie to bring into the palace, and couldn’t help but want to laugh. People in the world all said Second Miss Jiang was gentle and kind by nature, yet who knew that when facing her enemy, she showed no mercy. She clearly understood Lin Roujia’s weakness and struck precisely at Lin Roujia’s painful spot. That mirror became the last straw that broke the camel’s back. Lin Roujia would never be freed from her suffering again.
Thinking of Jiang Li, Emperor Hongxiao thought of Ji Heng, and he sighed, his gaze containing deep regret.
Although this campaign was arduous, the victory was splendid. Ji Heng’s first time leading troops achieved such results—he truly lived up to his father’s reputation. Northern Yan first went through Prince Cheng, then through the Yin Zhan affair. Throughout the court and countryside, people’s hearts were unsettled. He could certainly use methods to win people’s hearts, but if Ji Heng were here, it would be even better. Even now, the one he trusted most was still Ji Heng.
But Ji Heng actually couldn’t return.
The wind in the garden was icy cold. The flower beds no longer had the flourishing scene from spring days. Everyone understood the principle that prosperity must decline, but when truly facing it, why was it so difficult?
Eunuch Su draped a cloak over Emperor Hongxiao, saying softly, “The wind is strong outside. Your Majesty, please take care of your dragon body.”
Life has its rises and falls. For Ji Heng, his rise was too difficult, and his fall was extremely poignant, always making people feel great regret. In Emperor Hongxiao’s eyes appeared a trace of sadness, but the way of emperors had always been solitary. Even if not now, it would be in the future. He must face the coming storm of blood and wind alone and control the situation. Otherwise, it would be a betrayal of everything done in the past for the present.
He turned around and said, “Let’s go back.”
The figures of the two then gradually disappeared into the Imperial Garden.
…
The matter of Ji Heng dying on the battlefield—everyone under heaven knew. But unexpectedly, no gravesite was left. This was because now, with his death unseen and no corpse found, establishing a cenotaph at this time—Jiang Li was unwilling. It was as if doing so would destroy the last bit of hope in her heart.
Jinwu General Ji Minghan had been missing for many years, but in truth died in the Duke’s manor three years ago. Ji Heng seemed to have walked his father’s old path, having a similar fate. But whether he could still be alive was unknown. Jiang Li knew the hope of Ji Heng being alive was extremely slim. Everyone was hinting that she should accept reality.
Lu Ji and Wenren Yao hoped Ji Heng could be alive. Qimin had been searched many times over, but apart from this broken butterfly fan ornament, there was nothing.
He was like someone who walked out from the dark night, a spirit that never belonged to the mortal world, now returning to the void. He only left those who had seen him with a stunning silhouette, making people suspect they had merely had a colorful, beautiful dream.
In the depths of winter, as the Jinwu Army returned triumphantly to the capital with great victory and Emperor Hongxiao began thoroughly cleaning up the court and countryside, the Jiang family planned to leave Yanjing City.
Since the two Jiang brothers had already resigned from office, remaining in Yanjing City had little meaning. Instead, it would provoke suspicion in the young Emperor’s heart. Jiang Yuanbai was rather carefree. He had long ago asked someone to buy a residence in Yongzhou and planned to move the entire household there. Yongzhou also had good divine physicians—perhaps they could cure Jiang Youyao.
Jiang Jingyou naturally said nothing more. Jiang Jingrui, hearing that Yongzhou had many fun things, had long been eagerly anticipating it. But among the Jiang family, only one person was unwilling to go to Yongzhou—that was Jiang Li.
In Wanfeng Hall, only Old Madam Jiang and Jiang Yuanbai were present. Old Madam Jiang looked at Jiang Li in long silence. After who knows how long, she finally said, “Second girl, you truly want to stay in Yanjing City?”
“Yes, Grandmother.” Actually, Jiang Li had already hinted at this matter to Jiang Yuanbai many times, but the Jiang family always felt she was being willful, or perhaps would eventually change her mind. Jiang Li could only patiently answer again and again.
“Second girl, before when you spoke thus, I didn’t object either. As long as the Duke of Su returned to the capital, naturally you would enter the Duke of Su’s door. But now, the Duke of Su can’t return.” She looked at Jiang Li with pity. “If you continue being so stubbornly obsessed, in the future, you’ll only be harming yourself.”
“What does Grandmother mean by harm?”
Old Madam Jiang sighed. “If you stay in Yanjing City, I’m afraid you won’t be able to marry for your entire life. You’re young now and don’t feel the passage of time. But later, when you’re older, watching other families’ young ladies become wives and mothers early on, will you still be guarding the Duke’s manor alone? Though our Jiang family isn’t ungrateful, this world is inherently difficult for women. If you choose this path, your entire life may be very bitter, very lonely. Second girl, you are a descendant of our Jiang family, a miss of the Jiang family. The Jiang family now has nothing left, so there’s no need to worry about anything anymore. Even if we bear an unrighteous reputation, as long as it allows you to live more easily, we don’t care.”
Since returning to the Jiang residence for so long, Jiang Li knew Old Madam Jiang was a strict, shrewd person who valued reputation. In some aspects, she had Old Master Jiang’s integrity, but in other aspects, she was like Jiang Yuanbai, seeking advantages and avoiding harm. This time was the same. Jiang Li understood that Old Madam Jiang spoke these words with a few traces of genuine concern for her. She probably thought that since Jiang Li was still young, remarrying wouldn’t be difficult. The Duke’s manor now had no one left, and in the future, no one would protect her. Those gold, silver, and treasures of the Duke’s manor were like a child hoarding gold—inevitably inviting covetous glances. If something were to happen, for Jiang Li alone to hold on would be very difficult.
But Jiang Li only smiled and said, “I understand all the reasoning Grandmother speaks of. But between the Duke of Su and myself, there was an agreement. I should wait for him to return. If he can’t return, I should guard his things and not let others snatch them away. In this world, Ji Heng no longer has any relatives. If I don’t guard for him, no one will guard for him. I know Grandmother worries about me, but speaking officially, I am a descendant of the Jiang family and shouldn’t bring shame upon the Jiang family. If I truly committed such a disloyal act, many years later, how could I face the Jiang family ancestors beneath the Nine Springs? Speaking privately, I would be unworthy of the Duke of Su’s trust and sincerity.”
“Moreover,” she turned to look at Jiang Yuanbai, “His Majesty’s intentions in this matter are also quite intriguing.”
Jiang Yuanbai froze.
“His Majesty values the Duke of Su. Though the Duke of Su cannot return now, this precisely makes His Majesty infinitely regretful and trusting. If the Jiang family does this kind of thing at this juncture, I fear His Majesty’s heart would be displeased. Father has now resigned from office, allowing the Jiang family to withdraw completely. But what about many years from now, a hundred years from now? The Jiang family descendants may not be unable to return to Yanjing City. At that time, if because of my relationship the Jiang family descendants face difficulties, that would truly be more loss than gain. I’m willing to use myself alone to exchange for the Jiang family’s possible smooth path in the future. Achieving a good reputation—at least when Yanjing City mentions the Jiang family, it won’t disgrace the Jiang family’s doorway. The Jiang family will still be that honest family from the past, won’t it?”
Jiang Li spoke in high-sounding terms, but she herself knew these were merely reasons. The reasons were naturally all false. The only reason was simply because she herself wanted to wait here for Ji Heng.
This life was very long, long enough to potentially meet countless people, but this life was also very brief, brief enough that after seeing Ji Heng, she knew that in the days to come, she would never meet another person like Ji Heng whom she liked.
But she also wouldn’t seek death. Whether as Xue Fangfei or as Jiang Li, she wouldn’t seek death. The self that Ji Heng knew, under any circumstances, had no reason to give up her own life. She would stay here, guarding everything at the Duke’s manor, forever never being the one who broke the promise.
Old Madam Jiang stopped speaking, not because she was reminded by Jiang Li’s words—although Jiang Li’s words made sense—but more importantly, Jiang Li wasn’t someone willing to fight for herself or argue. For many things, once she heard them and agreed, that was that. Just like before in the Yin Zhili matter, whether she liked or didn’t like, everything was straightforward. But today, for the matter of staying in Yanjing City, she had said so much. She herself truly wanted to stay in Yanjing City. It wasn’t due to circumstances.
“Forget it,” Jiang Yuanbai spoke. He said slowly, “Since you want to stay in Yanjing City, then stay in Yanjing City. Little Li, you’re a clever girl. What Old Madam said, you must have thought of long ago. But you’re still like this, showing your mind is made up. Whether it’s me or Old Madam, neither of us can dissuade you. Before, I wronged you mother and daughter. Now, whatever you want to do, just go ahead and do it. However, if one day you change your mind and are unwilling to persist, you can come to Yongzhou. You’ll still be a miss of the Jiang family.”
Perhaps when people reached the time of parting, they would see everything lightly. Jiang Yuanbai rarely spoke such words. Jiang Li smiled. She said, “I know, Father. I also hope Father has everything go well in Yongzhou, and that the Jiang family prospers.”
On Jiang Yuanbai’s face was no happiness, only some trace of sadness. He had three daughters. Now one had died, one had left, and the only one remaining by his side was a crazed Jiang Youyao. Once he thought himself successful and proud, his official career smooth, believing his life would only continue in such splendid glory, but in the end, nothing remained.
For an instant, he truly believed in the words “karmic retribution.” Back then, how he treated Ye Zhenzhen and Jiang Li, now it was his turn to receive the same. Even if he wanted to compensate, what was past was past and couldn’t be redone. Some things also weren’t something that could be worn away in a simple day or two.
These were all bitter fruits he himself had sown.
Jiang Yuanbai said nothing more, only saying, “We’ll leave in half a month. The Jiang family residence will probably be sold. If you want to move to the Ye family or the Duke’s manor, you should start preparing these next few days.”
Jiang Li nodded. “Alright, Father.”
…
From the day Jiang Yuanbai spoke of leaving, Jiang Li truly began planning to “move.” But not packing was fine—once she started packing, she discovered that her belongings in the Jiang family were pitifully few. Apart from some clothes and jewelry, there were books. After Jiang Li moved to Fangfei Court, unlike Jiang Youyao and Ji Shuran before, she didn’t like to buy vases and ornaments for the courtyard and rooms. Therefore, altogether when packed up, it was merely a simple few chests. Baixue, Tong’er, Qingfeng, and Mingyue would leave with Jiang Li. Apart from them, there was no one from the Jiang family willing to stay by Jiang Li’s side. Apart from his own longtime servants, Jiang Yuanbai let most of the household staff return home. Jiang Jingrui, knowing Jiang Li wouldn’t leave with them, felt quite regretful and unwillingly told Jiang Li that someday in the future, Jiang Li would surely regret it, and then she’d better not come crying to them in Yongzhou.
Jiang Li smiled slightly but didn’t answer.
However, the matter of the Jiang family leaving the capital indeed stirred up quite a commotion in Yanjing City. Many people wanted to see Jiang Li’s reaction. If Jiang Li left with the Jiang family, it would be crossing the river and demolishing the bridge—truly not very principled. When news spread that Jiang Li wouldn’t leave together but would stay behind, one group of people felt Jiang Li was truly a daughter of the Jiang family with considerable integrity. Another group thought Jiang Li was fishing for fame and putting on an act. Even more people felt sorry for Jiang Li and sympathized with her future fate. A young lady in the prime of her youth would henceforth have to live alone. At such a young age, she would have to remain a widow. Not to mention being the eldest daughter of the Chief Minister’s family—even in an ordinary household, seeing this, others would say her fate was bitter.
No matter what choice Jiang Li made, there was no lack of loose-tongued people to gossip about it. Each time Tong’er went out and heard these rumors, she would angrily argue with people. Jiang Li herself didn’t really care. Since she couldn’t control everyone’s view, she’d just manage herself well.
Half a month later, the Jiang family would leave.
Early in the morning, Jiang Li rose early. Because it was the last day staying in Yanjing, the Jiang family ate breakfast together. Since Jiang Li returned to the Jiang residence, this was the first time eating breakfast with the entire extended family. A nanny had a maid help Jiang Youyao sit to one side and feed her. Jiang Youyao still stared vacantly at what was before her, mechanically swallowing the food in her mouth—she looked now much more adorable than when she was domineering before.
This was supposed to be the last family meal, yet everyone ate in heavy silence. For the Jiang family, leaving here also meant leaving their homeland. At such an advanced age, still having to leave home and wander—though it wasn’t due to life forcing them, it also wasn’t of their own initiative. If so many things hadn’t happened, who would be willing to leave?
This breakfast meal was eaten especially slowly. Everyone was unhurried. Even the usually carefree Jiang Jingrui became refined. It was as if they hoped this meal could last forever and never end.
But there was no banquet under heaven that didn’t end. This meal ultimately reached the time to disperse. After breakfast, Jiang Li wanted to see the Jiang family off to the city gate. In the carriage, Old Madam Jiang unusually spoke with Jiang Li about childhood matters—of course, all from before Jiang Li was sent to Qingcheng Mountain. Old Madam Jiang also carried some affection, but regrettably, the current Jiang Li wasn’t the real Second Miss Jiang and had no memories of Second Miss Jiang in her mind. Those past events didn’t belong to her. After listening, Jiang Li only felt regretful. If only the real Second Miss Jiang were here—but regrettably, departed people wouldn’t return, so one should cherish those before one’s eyes.
When they reached the city gate, Jiang Li got down from the carriage. The Jiang family also all got down. Jiang Jingrui looked at Jiang Li, still unwilling to give up, saying, “Have you really thought it through? It’s still not too late to change your mind now. As long as you say you want to go to Yongzhou and come with us, just don’t want those things. You staying alone in Yanjing City won’t be any fun.”
Lu Shi seemed to want to say something but hesitated, as if she also wanted to add a few words of persuasion, but probably Jiang Yuanping had already spoken with her beforehand. In the end, she said nothing.
“Have fun in Yongzhou,” Jiang Li said to him with a smile. “Perhaps in the future when I get a chance, I’ll also come to Yongzhou. Then you’ll have to show me around Yongzhou.”
Jiang Jingrui made a dismissive sound and said in a low voice, “Really stubborn.”
Jiang Li only smiled without speaking. She still remembered the first time she saw Jiang Jingrui. When the Jiang family was full of cold hostility toward Second Miss Jiang, this youth was carefree but didn’t look at her with the wary, strange gazes of others. Looking at Jiang Jingrui, she always thought of Xue Zhao. Second Miss Jiang and Jiang Jingrui were similar in age, but Xue Fangfei was older than Jiang Jingrui.
Jiang Yuanbai looked at Jiang Li, his face complex. Finally, he only patted Jiang Li’s shoulder and said, “Take good care of yourself.”
“Father as well.” Jiang Li said sincerely, “It’s cold. Wear more clothes and don’t catch a chill.”
Jiang Yuanbai wasn’t a bad person, but regarding Second Miss Jiang’s matter, he was too muddled. If not for his inability to distinguish right from wrong, Second Miss Jiang wouldn’t have died young. Precisely because of this, regarding Jiang Yuanbai, Jiang Li always couldn’t be as close as she was with the Ye family. It was as if doing so would wrong the departed Second Miss Jiang. But when it came down to it, at this moment, she suddenly felt all past events were like smoke, all grudges and emotions canceled out with one stroke.
It was just like this.
Jiang Yuanbai and Old Madam Jiang got back in the carriage. Lu Shi and the others waved farewell to Jiang Li from the carriage. Jiang Li stood at the city gate, watching the line of carriages gradually recede into the distance.
Tong’er and Baixue stood behind her. Both maids felt somewhat sad. Jiang Li suddenly also felt a bit desolate. No matter what, her nominal family was parting from her like this from now on. In this life and this world, who knew if there would be another chance to meet again.
Parting ultimately made one reluctant. At this moment, she understood how Ji Heng felt back then—watching family members leave one after another with his own eyes, until finally only he remained alone.
Jiang Li turned around, then froze. In the heavy snow of the twelfth month, through the wind and snow, not far away stood Xue Huaiyuan. Situ Jiuyue pushed Xue Zhao, holding an umbrella. They looked at her with concern, right behind her, visible with just a turn of her head.
Jiang Li first froze, then slowly, slowly smiled.
Perhaps she had never been alone. The feeling of having someone waiting behind was so good. So how could she let Ji Heng turn around and discover no one was behind him?
She too would be that person waiting behind.