Bai Ligelin remained unconscious for a full ten days, leaving Master Shen at a loss. Eventually, he even invited Zhongnan Jun, one of the founders of the academy, renowned for his water-based healing abilities. Years ago, when Xuan Shanzi of Xingzheng Hall was injured by chaos, only Zhongnan Jun could heal him.
However, Zhongnan Jun merely touched Bai Ligelin’s forehead before shaking his head, saying, “Her mind is in turmoil, and the spiritual energy within her body is in constant conflict. This is a sign of tribulation, and there’s no cure.”
Master Shen was shocked, “Tribulation? But she’s only achieved her Celestial Body less than fifty years ago.”
Zhongnan Jun sighed, “Cultivators come in all forms. This young female Daoist friend of ours likely carries too many worries in her heart, investing deeply in everything she does. Such a personality is most susceptible to tribulations. In her current state of unconsciousness, she’s probably experiencing constant illusions. Only she can pull herself out of it. Master Shen, you surely understand that matters of the heart are difficult to discuss. Her future depends entirely on herself.”
Although Bai Ligelin was the first disciple from the Central Plains that the Immortal Assembly had requested from the academy, Master Shen had always cherished her talent. After more than two hundred years of close companionship, he had long regarded her as his daughter. Seeing her encounter such a tribulation of the heart just after achieving her Celestial Body pained him deeply.
He knew Bai Ligelin’s temperament well but never expected everything to happen so quickly. Her pulse was already extremely weak. Even if she eventually woke up and successfully overcame this tribulation, her cultivation would likely suffer greatly, making it difficult for her to progress further, just like Lu Li. How could he not be heartbroken seeing his two most promising disciples in such a state?
Master Shen watched as Bai Ligelin tossed and turned on the bed, fine beads of sweat rolling down her face. Her complexion was as white as paper, her expression pained, and she mumbled incoherently. He didn’t need to guess to know that she must be dreaming of her family. Sighing, Master Shen tucked in her blanket. Suddenly, he saw her open her eyes, staring at him intently.
Those experiencing tribulations of the heart often see illusions, so Master Shen didn’t acknowledge her and was about to leave when he heard Bai Ligelin call out softly, “Master.”
Master Shen exclaimed in surprise, “You’re awake?”
Bai Ligelin didn’t confirm or deny, she just stared at him steadily and asked softly, “That day… why did you abandon Lu Li and me?”
Master Shen was even more surprised. That day? Abandon her and Lu Li? What was she talking about?
“Master has always been devoted to us, but sometimes I still think about that day. I shouldn’t,” Bai Ligelin gazed at him blankly. “It’s better to be a bit muddled in life, isn’t it?”
Master Shen pondered for a moment before suddenly realizing she might be referring to the incident at Haibi two hundred years ago. Back then, Bai Ligelin and Lu Li were used as bait to lure out Jiang Lifei, and he, as their master, had silently agreed. In fact, due to great temptation, he had chosen to abandon his two disciples.
Had she remembered this all along? Why had she never shown it before? Master Shen’s heart was filled with mixed emotions, leaving him speechless.
Her tribulation likely stemmed from her perfectionist expectations of emotions, and unable to tolerate even a grain of sand, whether for herself or others. In a lifetime, who can guarantee unwavering consistency towards another?
Master Shen sighed deeply, “Gelin, you could live a bit more freely.”
He wasn’t sure if she heard him, as her eyes had closed again. Master Shen recalled the past events, only able to sigh quietly, unsure whether it was regret or helplessness.
When Bai Ligelin opened her eyes again, she found her vision dim and surrounded by silence. Only the familiar breathing from above made her realize she wasn’t experiencing an illusion. Lu Li was holding her tightly from behind, his breath falling on her hair.
She called out softly, “Lu Li…”
“Mm.” His response was brief.
“I’ve harmed you all,” she murmured. “Su Wan and Deng Xiguang died just like that… If they hadn’t gone to Heng Mountain with me, they could have lived well. They had just become Dao companions, they must have had so much left unsaid…”
Lu Li shook his head, “Don’t say that. There will be chances for revenge in the future.”
“Can we still take revenge?” Bai Ligelin let out a laugh. “I… let me tell you… in the moment I thought I was dying, I saw my sister and Ye Ye… Do you think they’ve been waiting for me in Yellow Springs all along? They’re all dead, yet I’m still alive. That’s not right, is it?”
Lu Li pressed his lips together, his voice tinged with anger, “What are you trying to say?”
Bai Ligelin spoke softly, “Are you angry? I’m always so selfish, aren’t I?”
She paused for a moment, her eyes suddenly gleaming strangely, and continued, “Lu Li, I have so many questions I want to ask you. All these years… I’ve always wanted to ask, but I was afraid you’d be unhappy and leave me if I did. Back then, why did you say we were just fellow disciples?”
Lu Li’s arms tightened around her, his voice becoming somber, “What do you want me to say?”
She shook her head, “I don’t know… I thought we liked each other. You’ve been by my side all these years, yet I still want to ask these stupid questions. Are you angry?”
“I’m not angry,” he kissed her hair. “Even if I were, I’d only be angry at myself. It was my cowardice that made you dwell on this for so long.”
“What were you afraid of? Me?”
“Yes. Because I liked you too much, I couldn’t see clearly,” he chuckled. “Don’t laugh at my pitiful pride.”
Bai Ligelin laughed too, gripping his hand, “Now that you’ve said this, I understand. We could have lived so well together. Ye Ye admired you, you two could have been good brothers. We could have worked hard on our cultivation, and when free, you could have taken me to see the Nine Phoenix Tribe, or we could have gone to the Central Plains to see my sister and the others… When I was young, I always felt that my sister and Ye Ye didn’t care about me, but later I realized how important I was to them.
In my over two hundred years of life, the happiest time was right after the East Sea trials. Back then, I felt the future must be beautiful… A life with hope is beautiful, but now I have no hope left. I’ve let down Su Wan and the others, I’ve let you down, and I’ve let down my sister and Ye Ye… Lu Li, we’ve been Dao companions for so long, but you’ve never touched me. Do you… do you want to…”
At this point, her breathing became erratic, and she suddenly raised her hand to undo a knot in her robe.
Lu Li gripped her hand tightly, shaking his head, “Get some good rest. When you wake up, you won’t say such hopeless things anymore. I’ll always be here, always by your side.”
“I won’t wake up,” Bai Ligelin said softly. “I know this is tribulation. I just saw my sister and Su Wan and the others, they were all blaming me. I couldn’t take revenge, instead, I got my good friends killed… I…”
Her breathing became increasingly erratic, blood flowing from her seven apertures. Before she could finish speaking, she fainted again.
“Originally, Gelin was destined to die,” A’Jiao frowned slightly, then continued, “But later, Lu Li begged Father to use the forbidden technique of Duan Shui to seal Gelin’s memories, making her forget the tragic deaths of her family and friends. I don’t know why Father agreed to his request. Duan Shui is a forbidden technique, and if discovered, Father would surely face ostracism from both the Mountain and Sea factions. Despite my attempts to stop him, Father still used Duan Shui on Gelin. Afterward, Lu Li and Gelin lived together in this forest cabin. Both of them, one injured by the Xuan Hua Fire and the other entangled in tribulation, weren’t expected to live long. Father couldn’t bear to visit, and to keep the Duan Shui matter secret, no one else in the sect knew about it. In the end, only I would come to check on them.”
In the following two hundred years, it was the first time she saw Gelin smile so happily. This entire forest was formed from her sealed memories, each tree representing a forgotten past, evergreen regardless of the season.
Bai Ligelin and Lu Li spent the most beautiful and fulfilling two hundred years of their lives in this isolated forest, like immortal lovers.
The last time A’Jiao saw her was the day she gave birth to Lu Xiwei. Although Bai Ligelin had achieved her Celestial Body, the previous tribulation had already greatly damaged her vitality. Childbirth is extremely taxing for female cultivators, and by the time A’Jiao hurriedly arrived, Bai Ligelin only had a moment of final radiance left in her smile.
“Hang on! I’ll call Father right away!” In her panic, A’Jiao could only think of seeking help from Master Shen. As she stood up to leave, she suddenly realized something was amiss and exclaimed in shock, “Where’s Lu Li? He left you alone to give birth?!”
Bai Ligelin smiled gently at her, her expression serene, “He’s been suffering for my sake all these years, the wound from the Xuan Hua Fire must have caused him great pain. Two days ago, I watched him pass away with my own eyes. It’s just a pity he couldn’t see our child.”
A’Jiao was even more shocked. What did she say? Xuan Hua Fire? Wasn’t her memory sealed by Duan Shui? How could she remember? How could Lu Li have told her?
Bai Ligelin spoke softly, “Sister A’Jiao, your expression now makes me understand that those weren’t just nightmares. I did have a family, I did have friends, and they… they’re all dead, aren’t they?”
A’Jiao urgently said, “What are you saying? Never mind that now, wait here, I’ll send a message to Father!”
As she stood up to summon a wood-element bird, she felt a sharp pain in her throat. How unpredictable human hearts and emotions are – even the forbidden technique of Duan Shui couldn’t guarantee that Bai Ligelin would truly forget her pain. Duan Shui, Duan Shui – to cut water with a knife only makes it flow more. In the end, Gelin remembered everything.
A’Jiao turned back, forcing a smile, “Those were just nightmares. You need to hang on. How can you leave your child right after giving birth? How can a child live without a mother?”
Bai Ligelin continued to smile, her voice growing weaker, “This child… Lu Li and I discussed her name. Let’s call her Lu Xiwei. Sister A’Jiao, I’ll have to trouble you to look after her for me in the future. Let her… let her become your disciple. I know… you’ll treat her well. If you and Master Mo don’t plan to have children, please treat her as your flesh and blood, and let her be filial to you in the future.”
A’Jiao could no longer hold back her tears. This East Sea woman who had grown older with the years now cried like a child, “Don’t say anymore! Gelin, when do you remember? It was all sealed away!”
She could feel Bai Ligelin’s life force and spiritual energy rapidly fading. No one could stop death, and she was about to witness her die before her very eyes.
“I’m going to see my sister and Lu Li and the others,” Bai Ligelin closed her eyes, her voice becoming barely audible. “It feels so light… I… those nightmares… were they real?”
A’Jiao urgently said, “They weren’t real! They were just nightmares!”
Before she finished speaking, Bai Ligelin had quietly passed away. Master Shen, who had rushed over, naturally experienced another heartache. Afterward, they cremated her body and brought Lu Xiwei back to the Immortal Assembly to raise her with care. In the blink of an eye, sixteen years had passed.
A’Jiao turned to look at Jiang Lifei across from her and spoke calmly, “I’ve told you everything that happened. This entire forest was formed from Gelin’s memories sealed by the Duan Shui forbidden technique. Apart from my father and me, no one else can enter or leave. Your loyalty is admirable and I quite like you, but those not of our kind must have different hearts. I can only trouble you to stay here.”
With these words, her figure flickered and holding Lu Xiwei, she seemed to disperse like smoke, disappearing in the blink of an eye.