Shen Xiling had no such concerns. First, her mind wasn’t on these matters—she had no intention of competing with Xue Yuan for jealousy. Moreover, the storms she had weathered were too great; a young girl like Xue Yuan throwing tantrums was hardly enough to stir her emotions. Second, though this Miss Xue had always had some friction with her, she could see that her nature was fundamentally good. Shen Xiling had always felt that her own appearance had delayed Xue Yuan’s marriage prospects with Gu Juhan, so she had always felt quite guilty and accommodating toward her. Today, with her taking the initiative to visit, she had even less intention of turning her away.

Shen Xiling had Miss Xue invited in, served with good tea and fine fruits, and tidied herself up before going to the main hall to meet with her.

Though Miss Xue still showed her no pleasant expression, she actually showed concern for her both openly and subtly, vaguely inquiring whether she had recovered. Shen Xiling found her somewhat endearing, so she answered all her questions and thanked her. This seemed to make her feel somewhat uncomfortable, and she quickly changed the subject, taking a golden hairpin from her maid’s hands, carefully wrapped in silk.

She handed the hairpin to Lian Zi for Lian Zi to pass to Shen Xiling, saying: “I came today specifically to return this hairpin to Madam—it was said to have been dropped at the Imperial Censor’s mansion last time. The situation was somewhat chaotic that day, so it wasn’t found immediately. Lady Zhong has recently found it and asked me to deliver it to Madam.”

This was obviously a fabricated story.

What kind of person was Lady Zhong? She was the most socially adept figure in all of Shangjing, the most thoughtful and meticulous lady there was. She had long known about the delicate relationship between Xue Yuan and Duke Yanguo’s mansion—how could she specifically ask her to deliver a hairpin? It must be that Xue Yuan had used her aunt’s private friendship with Lady Zhong to specifically request this opportunity, though for what purpose was unknown.

Shen Xiling understood perfectly but had no intention of exposing this. She simply went along with Xue Yuan’s intent, looked at the hairpin, then shook her head, saying: “Miss Xue has taken great trouble, but this hairpin isn’t mine. I’m afraid it belongs to someone else.”

Of course the hairpin wasn’t hers. When she had said it was lost that day, it had merely been a pretext—the golden hairpin had been safely tucked in her sleeve the entire time. Lady Zhong had searched diligently for several days, and Miss Xue had gone to the trouble of delivering it specially.

Upon hearing that this wasn’t the hairpin Shen Xiling had dropped, Xue Yuan couldn’t help but furrow her delicate brows, looking somewhat anxious. After the maid returned the hairpin to her, she showed signs of wanting to leave hastily, saying: “Then I’ll go speak with Lady Zhong again and ask her to search some more.”

Knowing the hairpin hadn’t actually been lost, Shen Xiling naturally felt very guilty seeing Xue Yuan’s earnestness, but she couldn’t tell the truth. She could only say: “It’s just a hairpin, nothing valuable. Please don’t trouble yourself or Lady Zhong to search anymore. Let’s just leave it at that.”

This was a perfectly normal response, but unexpectedly Xue Yuan became very angry upon hearing it, her almond eyes widening as she said: “Wasn’t this hairpin something the General specifically won for Madam at the polo match? How can Madam be so careless with his gift?”

Shen Xiling was startled upon hearing this, finally understanding: it turned out Xue Yuan had gone to such trouble to find the hairpin simply because it was connected to Gu Juhan.

She actually sought nothing for herself—she had deliberately come to the Duke’s mansion when Gu Juhan wasn’t there, showing she hadn’t intended to encounter him by chance. She hadn’t tried to secretly keep the hairpin he had won, but instead had conscientiously searched for it on Shen Xiling’s behalf. She was simply so fond of him that she wanted to protect everything connected to him.

Such devotion greatly moved Shen Xiling, and also made her think of herself: she too loved Qi Ying in this way. Fortunately, she had once received a response, but what about Xue Yuan…?

This made Shen Xiling feel even more guilty toward Miss Xue. If she hadn’t suddenly interfered, perhaps Xue Yuan would have long since married Gu Juhan. This would not only have fulfilled her wishes, but Gu Juhan could have had a normal family instead of the current cold and lonely situation.

Since awakening from her dream, Shen Xiling had become increasingly sentimental about human affairs, feeling that worldly changes were too numerous and that even small joys should be doubly cherished. She truly didn’t want to ruin a good match, which was why she brought up Xue Yuan’s matter to Gu Juhan that evening, hoping to bring them together and make amends for her own transgressions.

She briefly told Gu Juhan about the hairpin incident, then said quite seriously: “I think Miss Xue is very good, and the best thing about her is her genuine feelings for the General. If the General agrees, I can handle all the arrangements for bringing her into the household as a secondary wife. It won’t trouble the mansion at all, and this way everyone would be happy. I’m sure the Xue family would be pleased too.”

She spoke gently and warmly, her expression very sincere, yet it made Gu Juhan’s eyes dim slightly.

So she had nearly lost that hairpin, all for the sake of seeing Qi Jingchen once.

Of course he understood very clearly that person’s place in her heart. She had missed him for five years, and to see him once she could abandon everything. Never mind the hairpin he had given her—she could even risk her own life, since that person had once risked his life to protect her. Their bond had reached such depths that whatever they did for each other was appropriate, with no such thing as excess.

Yet he still couldn’t help feeling somewhat dejected.

She probably still had no idea to this day that he harbored special feelings for her. When she had first married him, she had been extremely guarded and still heartbroken, so naturally he couldn’t express anything to her and had to keep everything hidden deep in his heart. He had planned to wait until she gradually emerged from her past feelings before revealing his own, never expecting that over these five years she would only sink deeper, with no possibility of forgetting that person. He had been forced to continue hiding, playing the role of her brother and friend, not knowing how long this would have to continue.

And now she wanted to arrange a wife for him.

He naturally understood her good intentions. She hoped he could have a real family and children. For someone like him who frequently went to battle, having descendants was especially important.

He himself wasn’t unaware of this, but he simply didn’t want to marry someone else. He vaguely felt that if he married another, she would leave, as if she had finally found a reason to depart.

And he absolutely didn’t want her to leave—not to mention the situation with Qi Jingchen…

The expression in his eyes grew deeper and more somber.

Gu Juhan sighed and put down his chopsticks, looking at Shen Xiling. For the first time he felt an urge to reveal his feelings to her immediately. His eyes revealed some emotion as he said to her: “Xiling, I’m not lonely. With you in this mansion, I feel everything is very good.”

These words actually contained nothing improper—even if he were merely her friend or brother, he could say such things completely. But Shen Xiling was so sensitive and perceptive that she immediately detected a different meaning.

She looked toward Gu Juhan and vaguely discovered a different light in his eyes. She was somewhat familiar with such implications—it seemed she had once looked at Qi Ying that way, and Qi Ying had looked at her that way too. They both knew what kind of gaze that was.

Words on the tip of the tongue, yet held back.

She wasn’t certain whether her perception was accurate, and dared not believe that Gu Juhan could have any special feelings for her. She panicked somewhat and immediately looked away, cutting off some connection between them at once.

She even stood up abruptly in her confusion.

This action was so sudden that it immediately made the situation awkward. Shen Xiling felt even more embarrassed, thinking perhaps she had been overthinking, and if she had wrongly suspected Gu Juhan, how inappropriate her sudden rising must appear.

But at that moment she couldn’t consider all this and hastily said: “I… I’ve finished eating. I have a bit of a headache and want to return to my room to rest.”

Without even waiting for Gu Juhan’s response, she immediately hurried out of the small flower hall.

Gu Juhan watched her hurried departure with a very complex expression.

He knew he had made a mistake, been too hasty, and frightened her away. He wasn’t normally such an impatient person—he had seen the most difficult battles on the battlefield and had experienced much training in patience and endurance.

So why had he acted so inappropriately today?

Was it Qi Jingchen’s sudden arrival that made him feel threatened? Or was it her vague intention to leave that made him panic?

Gu Juhan sighed somewhat.

Xiling, you still don’t understand even now.

That person… ultimately cannot give you permanence.

Several days passed quickly, and soon it was the Buddha Bathing Festival on the eighth day of the fourth month.

The Buddha Bathing Festival, also called Buddha’s Birthday, was said to be Shakyamuni’s birth date. This festival had originally been popular in Jiangzuo, but later Great Wei was also influenced by it and adopted this custom. Every year on the eighth day of the fourth month, Buddhist temples would hold sutra recitation ceremonies, bathing the statue of Prince Siddhartha’s birth with various fragrant waters, and devout men and women would often perform acts of charity on this day. Any renowned monastery in Shangjing would hold Buddha bathing and vegetarian feasts on the eighth day of the fourth month. The Jade Buddha Temple in the capital had been built with imperial funds, and every Buddha Bathing Festival, Emperor Wei would personally attend.

Gu Jingqi had been looking forward to this day when she could go out for some freedom, so for several days she had behaved very well. She had memorized all her poetry and books perfectly, and even her handwriting had become much neater when doing assignments, greatly satisfying her teacher and father, who thus permitted her to go out for the festivities.

She was overjoyed, and early that morning had dressed and rushed to her eldest sister-in-law’s courtyard, just as her brother and sister-in-law were coming out together.

She obediently greeted her eldest brother, then cozied up to her sister-in-law to curry favor, hoping that after returning from Jade Buddha Temple today they could stop by Yilou for a meal. Shen Xiling had always been fond of her and naturally nodded in agreement.

Gu Jingqi was delighted, sticking close to Shen Xiling from the courtyard all the way to the mansion gate. Upon leaving the gate, she saw that the Gu family members were all already prepared to board their carriages outside.

They all greeted Gu Juhan. Gu Jingqi’s own brother, Gu Jusheng, seeing her clinging to their eldest sister-in-law, felt quite helpless and laughed: “This morning I couldn’t find this little monkey anywhere—turns out she ran off to bother eldest sister-in-law. Come here quickly, your carriage is over here.”

After speaking, he apologized to Shen Xiling, who smiled and said: “Third brother needn’t be so formal. Jingqi is very well-behaved and hasn’t caused any trouble.”

Gu Jusheng politely thanked his eldest sister-in-law, then called for Gu Jingqi to come over. Gu Juhan smiled and waved his hand, saying: “Since she likes staying with her sister-in-law, let her be.”

He then turned to Gu Jingqi and said: “Behave yourself in the carriage and don’t disturb your sister-in-law.”

After speaking, he nodded to Shen Xiling and called for a servant to bring his horse, apparently planning to ride there himself.

Shen Xiling said nothing, only took Gu Jingqi into the carriage. Soon the carriage was heading toward Zhemo Mountain where Jade Buddha Temple was located.

Gu Jingqi was restless the entire journey, thinking that her eldest brother had always preferred being together with sister-in-law, so why today was he so kind as to give her the carriage while riding his horse instead? There must be something fishy going on.

She couldn’t help but suspect that her recent guesses had indeed been correct—there must be some vixen who had taken advantage of sister-in-law’s illness to steal him away! How detestable that her eldest brother was so unclear-headed, so easily manipulated, and had begun to grow distant from sister-in-law!

Author’s Note: Tomorrow there will be a meeting~