Bang bang bang! Lu Ying repeatedly knocked three times before someone inside spoke impatiently through the door crack: “What are you banging for? This is a private Taoist temple belonging to a princely mansion – no unauthorized persons allowed!”

Lu Ying said: “Master Zhiping asked me to deliver a message. The master encountered a small problem at Santong Inn and needs the temple head to come over.”

The “Three Seconds” Taoist’s religious name was Zhiping.

The door opened, and a Taoist wearing a black gauze hat waved her inside.

White Deer Temple wasn’t large, but it had an air of noble imperial grandeur. There were two lifelike white deer statues in the corridor. In the center of the courtyard stood a bagua altar platform with a sea lamp topped by a glazed lampshade that burned year-round through wind, snow, and sandstorms. It burned expensive wax oil, consuming at least twenty pounds daily – clearly demonstrating White Deer Temple’s extravagance.

Lu Ying walked while mentally memorizing the temple’s layout and arrangement so she could sketch it from memory later. Following the Taoist into White Deer Hall, she saw two rows of black-robed Taoists, each quite robust-looking. Lu Ying handed the letter written on the handkerchief to the temple head sitting in the central antler chair, then recounted how Master Zhiping was caught in adultery by Butcher Hu.

“…That’s how it happened. Master Zhiping is detained at Santong Inn by Butcher Hu – one hand pays silver, the other hand releases the person. Master Zhiping gave me a piece of silver to run this errand and deliver the message. Whether you’re going or not, please give me a definite answer, temple head – they’re waiting for my reply at the inn.”

“Bastard!” After reading the plea for help on the handkerchief, the temple head slammed it hard on the desk. “This Zhiping keeps falling into women’s traps time and again – he never learns! Stubbornly unrepentant – I think he’ll die at a woman’s hands someday!”

Lu Ying thought: From the temple head’s reaction, it seems Master Zhiping’s womanizing mishaps aren’t a recent development.

The two rows of Taoists all spoke up with various opinions. Some advocated peace: “Temple head, calm your anger. The urgent matter is to quickly pay to rescue Senior Brother Zhiping – don’t let small matters ruin big plans.”

Others favored confrontation without compromise: “We can’t pay money. This is obviously a honey trap – Senior Brother Zhiping was caught in a snare. Those street thugs see that Prince Jing has gone to Anlu for his fiefdom and Prince Jing’s mansion has declined, thinking we have no backing, so they quickly set up traps to bully our White Deer Temple. If we meekly pay ransom today, word will spread from ten to a hundred – everyone will think White Deer Temple is a soft persimmon anyone can squeeze. The consequences would be endless. Today comes Butcher Hu, tomorrow comes Butcher Li – should we be extorted forever?”

People began taking sides: “Right, we White Deer Temple Taoists – are we afraid of some street butcher? Brothers, let’s all go to Santong Inn to rescue Senior Brother Zhiping and give that butcher a good beating. Let’s see who dares provoke our White Deer Temple in the future.”

“Count me in too – I’ll go as well.”

Others opposed: “Times have changed – what time is this? We can’t help Prince Jing, so we can’t add to His Highness’s troubles either. Senior Brother Zhiping stumbled on the word ‘lust.’ After this disaster, he’ll definitely learn his lesson and cultivate himself properly. He won’t cause trouble again.”

“I agree. Though the streets are nearly empty due to the sandstorm, there are many spectators at Santong Inn. If word gets out, they’ll only say a group of Taoists bullied one butcher. That butcher caught them red-handed in adultery with witnesses – he’s in the right. If the butcher goes to court accusing Master Zhiping of adultery with his wife, he has justification and witnesses. When the yamen sends officers to arrest Master Zhiping for trial – wouldn’t that be even more troublesome?”

“Right, impatience in small matters ruins great plans. We must protect Senior Brother Zhiping. This time senior brother suffered greatly – he definitely won’t dare repeat this in the future.”

Someone sneered coldly: “If Senior Brother Zhiping didn’t love women, pigs would climb trees. He’s brought prostitutes through the back door several times for overnight stays, making the meditation rooms reek with foul air. I live next door and heard everything, yet he refused to admit it and hid the prostitutes in closets. He’s a disaster who’ll eventually ruin our entire White Deer Temple clean! I say don’t pay ransom – just let this Butcher whatever-his-name chop off his head. Only then can we live in peace.”

The implication was to silence him permanently – using Butcher Hu’s hand to eliminate the threat.

Someone immediately cursed: “You heartless, ungrateful wretch! If Senior Brother Zhiping hadn’t picked you up from the streets back then, you’d probably still be begging with a broken bowl at the City God Temple!”

“It was clearly Prince Jing who supported me, not Senior Brother Zhiping. Now His Highness is being dragged down by this person – why not get rid of this burden?”

Both sides began a war of words over whether to protect or abandon him. If Lu Ying weren’t present, they’d probably have started fighting.

It seemed that after Prince Jing went to his fiefdom, his succession prospects dimmed, causing people’s hearts to waver. When people’s hearts scattered, the team became hard to lead.

“Stop arguing!” The temple head stood up with finality. “We’ll fish him out first, then talk.”

The temple head took banknotes and led his fellow Taoists in a grand procession following Lu Ying to Santong Inn. Constable Wu was actually sitting face-to-face with Wang Daxia, raising cups in shared drinking, while Master Zhiping crouched in the corner with a bruised and swollen face: “Temple head, save me!”

Looking at the pig-headed figure before him, if not for the familiar voice, the temple head wouldn’t have recognized him.

Seeing six people arrive, Constable Wu pushed his wife aside and held his butcher’s knife horizontally between them: “Oh, are you paying money or snatching people? Coming with so many people – do you think Butcher Hu fears you stinking Taoists?”

The temple head noticed both Constable Wu and Wang Daxia wore face veils: “You two still don’t show your true faces – what are you afraid of? Are you habitual honey trappers afraid other victims will recognize you and take you to court? I can give you the banknotes, but remove your face veils first.”

Constable Wu was a famous constable of Shuntian Prefecture Court, a tiger-slaying hero whom many people knew. To conceal his appearance, he’d deliberately stuck on a circle of beard around his chin. But if he removed his face veil, he might be recognized, so Constable Wu stubbornly refused, making an excuse:

“Don’t think I’m stupid. Before catching the adulterers, I investigated – your White Deer Temple is Prince Jing’s private property, you’re all the prince’s people, and you have strength in numbers. If you see our faces clearly and find us, you might retaliate against us couple in the future. We’d die without knowing how.”

This was clearly a naked honey trap. The temple head asked: “So you’re not really surnamed Hu?”

Constable Wu chuckled: “Of course not. Today, besides my wife’s pair of big tits, nothing else is real.”

Wang Daxia cooperated with Constable Wu’s words, shaking her breasts threateningly: “Master, would you like to inspect the merchandise?”

At this point, it became a matter of nerve – whoever had more guts would win.

The White Deer Temple Taoists were so shocked they all lowered their heads, not daring to look directly: This seductive energy is too much – no wonder Senior Brother Zhiping fell into the trap. Even I would… ahem!

When they entered, wanted posters with cart driver Zhiping’s portrait were still pasted on the inn walls. Fortunately, this brute had beaten Zhiping into a pig-head, so despite the crowd watching, no one recognized him as the wanted criminal on the wall.

The wanted poster clearly stated: capture this person for a thousand taels reward silver.

This honey-trapping brute thought he’d earned five hundred taels, not knowing he could have legally earned double!

What a blind, foolish waste. The temple head contemptuously slapped five hundred-tael banknotes on the desk: “Release him.”

Constable Wu took the banknotes, stuffed them in his robes, and grabbed Wang Daxia’s hand: “We’re leaving.”

Seeing Constable Wu departing, Master Zhiping said indignantly: “Hmph, a pair of thieves!”

Smack!

The temple head raised his hand and slapped him: “Flies don’t bite seamless eggs – you’ve completely lost face for our White Deer Temple! Someone carry him back and deal with him according to temple rules.”

Master Zhiping knew he was wrong. Getting beaten, he didn’t dare make a sound. Besides, compared to Constable Wu’s devastating kicks and face-ruining punches, the temple head’s slap felt like a mosquito bite – not painful at all.

The innkeeper quickly caught up: “Um… please settle the room and meal charges.”

Actually, he should have asked Constable Wu, since Master Zhiping hadn’t actually slept and hadn’t eaten the food. But Constable Wu’s sharp butcher’s knife was too frightening – the innkeeper didn’t dare chase him for money, so he squeezed the soft persimmon instead.

As they say, when the tree falls, the monkeys scatter. Prince Jing’s tree hadn’t truly fallen yet, but the once-lofty White Deer Temple was already being extorted by honey-trapping thieves and Santong Inn’s innkeeper.

The temple head was focused on getting the troublemaker Zhiping back first and didn’t want complications, so he endured and paid the silver.

Performing the act completely, Constable Wu and Wang Daxia strutted through the streets, exiting the city through Fucheng Gate and disappearing into the swirling sandstorm, putting on the appearance of honey trappers who changed locations after each con to confuse observers. Actually, they immediately changed clothes in the suburbs, and after disguising themselves, returned to the capital through Zhengyang Gate.

When they returned to the capital, it was already dark. Each went to their own homes – Constable Wu returned to Shuntian Prefecture Court, Wang Daxia went to the Embroidered Uniform Guard offices.

Wang Daxia had barely sat down when Lu Ying tossed him a black Taoist robe embroidered with White Deer Temple markings: “Tonight we’re infiltrating White Deer Temple to investigate. Change clothes quickly – we have someone inside to assist us.”

It turned out Lu Ying’s message delivery to get White Deer Temple to fish out their man from Santong Inn was to create an opportunity. When the temple head led most Taoists out to Santong Inn, only two people remained to guard the temple, leaving defenses empty. Embroidered Uniform Guard secret agents quietly slipped in and stole several White Deer Temple robes to facilitate tonight’s nighttime temple investigation.

Investigation wasn’t easy. Daxia sighed: “Just let me catch my breath. I haven’t eaten dinner yet. Constable Wu ate the entire table of food and wine while I had to play the little wife serving him wine and picking up food – exhausting.”

Lu Ying said: “Constable Wu helped us greatly – serving him was proper. If you’re hungry, don’t you have your own two Shandong big steamed buns? Time’s running short – eat in the carriage.”

Wang Daxia had to change clothes and tie a Taoist topknot, taking buns bigger than his head to gnaw on while asking: “How was Dr. Wei’s health today?”

Lu Ying said: “Noble Consort Shang summoned her into the palace again.”

Wang Daxia felt sorry that Wei Caiwei was too overworked – she’d lost half a pot of blood just a month ago and had barely recovered. How could she be tossed back and forth like this? He asked: “She just returned from the palace the day before yesterday, and she’s summoned again today? This Noble Consort Shang has so many problems. Dr. Wei’s body isn’t made of iron.”

Lu Ying said: “According to brothers patrolling the palace, a black specter appeared in the palace, frightening Noble Consort Shang. She was so scared she developed a persistent high fever, so she summoned Dr. Wei into the palace.”

Author’s Note: Daxia: I eat myself

Black specter, pronounced hēi shěng, was what ancients called disasters born from the water qi of the five elements. In the five elements, water is black, hence called “black specter.” This appeared before the Northern Song’s destruction, and also appeared multiple times in Emperor Jiajing’s palace. It remains a mystery to this day. According to Records of the Ming Dynasty: In the same year, “On the gengxu day of the seventh month, a black specter appeared in the capital. Civilians, men and women, slept outdoors. There was a creature with golden eyes and a long tail, shaped like a dog or fox, carrying black qi as it entered through windows, reaching directly into inner chambers. Upon arrival, people would fall unconscious. The entire city was alarmed, wielding weapons and lighting lamps, beating gongs and drums to chase it, but could not catch it. When the emperor held court, guards at Fengtian Gate saw it and caused an uproar. The emperor wanted to rise, but Huai’en held the emperor’s robes, and after a moment things calmed down.”

This meant the monster had golden eyes, a long tail, looked like a dog or fox, and carried a black aura as it entered homes. Those who saw it would fall unconscious. The entire capital was disturbed, but they couldn’t catch it. Eventually it even tried to enter the imperial palace, frightening the emperor into wanting to flee.