The next day, Zhou Shaojin woke up late.

She couldn’t help but feel secretly relieved.

Fortunately, Old Madam Guo didn’t have the habit of making people follow strict rules, otherwise just this one incident would have been enough for people to criticize her.

Zhou Shaojin hurriedly got up, had breakfast, and went to the main hall of Hanbi Mountain Manor.

Old Madam Guo had already gone to the Buddhist hall and was washing her hands in preparation for sutra recitation.

Zhou Shaojin walked in with a flushed face.

The morning sunlight fell on her face, lustrous and smooth, as flawless and exquisite as fine jade.

Old Madam Guo couldn’t help but smile at Nanny Lü, saying, “Youth is wonderful! She only went to bed in the middle of the night yesterday, yet gets up this morning full of energy. Unlike us—even under lamplight we look like old withered vines.”

Nanny Lü laughingly played along.

Zhou Shaojin bashfully stepped forward and greeted her with “Old Madam.”

Old Madam Guo squeezed her hand and said magnanimously, “It’s nothing! When I was your age, I wasn’t as good as you! If I’d gone out to play all day and had to get up this early, I couldn’t have managed it.”

Zhou Shaojin was very grateful. She helped Old Madam Guo sit down before the Buddha and began accompanying her in sutra recitation.

That afternoon, she received a letter from her sister.

Seeing that Zhou Shaojin was doing well in Jiuru Lane, Zhou Chujin was very pleased. In her letter, she told her that during the Dragon Boat Festival, Liao Shaotang had used the excuse of visiting friends to secretly take her to watch the dragon boat races.

Zhou Shaojin had known her sister would be happy after marriage, but seeing her sister’s letter and sensing the happiness between the lines, she was still extremely pleased. She put down the letter and immediately wrote back to her sister, asking when she would go to the capital. If she went to the capital, she should remember to bring back some preserved fruits—she really wanted to try the capital’s delicacies. She also shared some daily interesting stories. As for distressing matters like Wu Baozhang and Cheng Lu, she didn’t mention a single word.

But before she could finish writing the letter, Cheng Jia came over.

She brought a basket of cherries and a basket of oranges, grinning cheekily as she came up to Zhou Shaojin to chat: “You’re writing to Sister Chujin? What did you write? Is Sister Chujin doing well there? Does Brother-in-law treat her well?” She then called to Chun Wan, “Distribute these cherries and oranges to everyone.”

Zhou Shaojin ignored her and only told Chun Wan, “Remember to send some to the main hall!”

Chun Wan smiled and withdrew.

Cheng Jia then diligently ground ink for Zhou Shaojin, saying, “Shaojin, the Heir of Duke Liangguo is getting married on the fifteenth. I’m sure Zhu Zhu won’t be able to go out. I checked the almanac and thought of setting the twenty-fifth of the fifth month to invite everyone to our house to view the lotus flowers. What do you think?”

Zhou Shaojin still wore a cold expression, saying, “You’re inviting people to view flowers—what does that have to do with me?”

Cheng Jia smiled apologetically, “Shaojin, you and I are the only young ladies in the mansion. If I’m hosting guests, how can you not come? Besides, these people were originally your friends—I’m just borrowing flowers to present to Buddha. How is it not your business?”

Zhou Shaojin said nothing, imitating Cheng Chi’s manner as she methodically sprinkled fine sand on the letter.

Cheng Jia helped on the side, and while Zhou Shaojin waited for the ink to dry, she said sincerely, “Shaojin, I know this was my fault. I apologize to you! Don’t be angry with me anymore. When I went to see Li Jing, I also… I had no choice!” As she spoke, her cheeks turned bright red and her voice lowered several degrees, “I asked Grandmother. I didn’t expect Grandmother to oppose it too. She even said it was Mother’s idea. She felt Mother was right—marrying into a merchant family, with different living habits, there would be many hardships. But my heart has his shadow in it. Whenever I think about marrying someone else, my heart feels like a hole has been carved out with a knife. The pain is bloody…”

Zhou Shaojin froze.

Seeing she finally showed some reaction, and remembering she was someone extremely soft-hearted who would treat you even better if you treated her sincerely, Cheng Jia couldn’t help but pour out her feelings: “At first I thought he just wanted to use Jiuru Lane’s influence. Later I discovered he was doing perfectly well in Luoyang, and his family had produced jinshi scholars before. He was just being humble in front of me, and I felt a bit guilty…

“Later, when I saw him treat my words like imperial edicts—whatever I mentioned or wanted, he would go through fire and water to get it for me, yet never mentioned the hardships he suffered in front of me—my heart could no longer treat him as just a cousin… And later still, whatever he did, he always put me first…

“To speak shamelessly, even my parents haven’t been this considerate and gentle. I gradually couldn’t let him go…” As she spoke, her eyes grew moist, yet her face showed a dreamy smile, her voice tender as if containing honey: “Shaojin, you’ve never liked someone. If you had liked someone, you would understand… When eating and seeing a good dish, you think of him, wishing he could also have a taste. Passing through the garden and seeing a beautiful flower in bloom, you think of him, wishing he could also appreciate it.

“When talking to others and occasionally mentioning something related to him, you also think of him, wondering what he’s doing at this moment? Whether he’s also thinking of me? Even when sleeping, I’m thinking… What’s in my heart, what appears in my mind—it’s all him… I can’t help but feel that just knowing he’s still in Jinling, my heart has something to rely on, feels secure and grounded… As long as I can see him, even if it means sneaking around like a thief, doing things I most despise and dislike, I’m willing to do it gladly…

“This kind of love is the first time in my whole life, something no one else has ever given me… and there will never be another like it…

“So at Qingyan Tower, when I knew he was right next door, I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“I thought just seeing him once would be enough.

“Just one glance.

“Just a few words.

“Without doing anything, just meeting him like this would make my heart sweet.”

Zhou Shaojin sat there in a daze, her fingers turning cold.

Cheng Jia’s words swirled through her mind.

“Without doing anything, just one glance makes my heart sweet.”

“Things I most despise and dislike—as long as it’s for him, I do them gladly.”

“Just knowing he’s by my side makes my heart feel it has something to rely on, feels secure and grounded.”

“Whether eating, sleeping, walking or talking, I think of him, wondering what he’s doing, whether he’s thinking of me.”

“Even my parents haven’t treated me as well as he does.”

“This kind of love is the first time…”

This… is what liking someone means?

Zhou Shaojin felt as if all strength had been drained from her body. She slumped there, unable to move.

But Cheng Jia was still immersed in her own thoughts, saying sweetly, “You don’t even know—when I ran over there, Li Jing was so scared when he saw me that his face turned white. He pulled me into a private room in one swift motion. But there were still several of his friends in the room, so he could only say I was a senior maid from Mother’s side, there to deliver a message.” Perhaps thinking of that scene, she giggled, “Then he took me to a quiet little side room. I was so angry at the time. Everyone says the most famous courtesans on the Qinhuai River often receive guests at Qingyan Tower—he’s so familiar with the place, he must go in and out of Qingyan Tower frequently.

“But when he nervously asked me what had happened, whether I’d been wronged at home, and comforted me not to be afraid, that I could blame everything on him—my heart melted completely, and I could only shake my head.

“When he realized I’d only come to see him once, he—such a composed person—was so happy he was like something else entirely, scratching his head and pacing around in front of me.

“I suddenly felt that even if someone saw me, even if Mother scolded me, it would all be worth it.”

She rambled on and on. Sensing that Zhou Shaojin wasn’t responding at all, she felt somewhat embarrassed and stopped talking, looking at Zhou Shaojin: “Shaojin, you must look down on me! Think I’m shameless, but I just like him. My heart goes from heaven to earth—if he treats me well, I’m in heaven; if he treats me badly, I’m in hell… Shaojin!” She cried out in alarm, “You—what’s wrong with you?”

Looking at Zhou Shaojin’s face, pale as paper, Cheng Jia got a terrible fright. She rushed to her side to feel her forehead: “What’s wrong with you? Say something! Don’t scare me!”

Zhou Shaojin’s forehead was covered in fine beads of sweat.

Cheng Jia was terrified and called out loudly, “Nanny Fan, come quickly and check on Shaojin. She’s not well!”

Zhou Shaojin, whose expression had been somewhat dazed, seemed to be startled awake by her. She grabbed the hand touching her forehead and said, “I’m fine! Keep your voice down! Don’t alarm Old Madam!”

Her voice was weary and fragile, thin as a thread, as if it would break at any moment. Her hands were ice cold, as if they’d been chilled—if she weren’t still breathing, Cheng Jia would have suspected she’d fallen into an ice hole in the dead of winter…

Could it be that Shaojin had been possessed by evil spirits again, like two years ago?

Though Zhou Chujin had tried hard to hide it at the time, her mother had coincidentally also gone to Huiji Temple in the southern part of the city and had seen Zhou Chujin… If she really was possessed by evil spirits again, they truly couldn’t let everyone know…

Cheng Jia’s face instantly turned deathly pale with fright. She wanted to push Zhou Shaojin away, but then remembering she was wearing the protective amulet Li Jing had given her—supposedly blessed by an eminent monk from Shaolin Temple—she instead held Zhou Shaojin tightly in her arms, saying in a trembling voice, “Don’t scare me, I’m timid! What’s wrong with you? Should I, should I write to Sister Chujin and have her come back? Do you feel unwell anywhere? I, I’d better put this protective amulet on you… Li Jing said it’s been blessed, blessed by an eminent monk… Everything he gives me is good quality, he wouldn’t give me anything that isn’t good… You have to trust him…”

She began to speak incoherently, trembling as she tried to remove the Hetian jade pendant of annual peace hanging from her neck.

Zhou Shaojin’s grip on her hand tightened so much that she couldn’t break free.

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” Her voice was barely audible, beads of sweat the size of beans appearing on her forehead, “You said you like Li Jing… Is liking someone really as you described… What’s in your heart, what appears in your mind is all him… Just thinking of him makes your heart feel grounded, willing to do even the most disagreeable things…”

Cheng Jia stared at Zhou Shaojin in astonishment, “Why are you asking this?”

“Never mind why I’m asking!” Zhou Shaojin’s eyes, usually so clear and serene, were now filled with anxiety and unease, “Just tell me whether it ‘is’ or ‘isn’t’!”

This furiously agitated Zhou Shaojin was something Cheng Jia had never seen before and couldn’t even imagine.

She quickly said, “Of course! If this isn’t liking someone, then what is? Would you think about your father this way? Would you think about Sister Chujin this way?”