Yet ultimately, one night as husband and wife creates a hundred days of affection. To say there was no love—on the surface she could appear very resolute, but in the deepest recesses of her heart, she still felt regret and pain. Even in the dream just now, she was still crying and calling for him to turn back. Just as he said, how difficult it was for two people to be together, going through countless tribulations of separation and reunion. She wasn’t made of stone—she had wholeheartedly wanted to grow old with him. It wouldn’t matter if they had no children; they could pass the title to Lan Zhou. In the future, when he retired, the two of them could find a place with clear mountains and beautiful waters to live, fishing and tending flowers—how wonderful that would be!
She had always been at the center of power, and actually often grew weary of that kind of scheming and calculation. For instance, after Elder Brother’s death and the series of upheavals that followed, how cruel the struggle for the throne was. Even among close relatives it was like this—with dynastic changes, how many people had to die? One general’s success was built on ten thousand bones. When he ruled over all under heaven, those innocent soldiers and common people would have to pay a tragic price for his ascension to the peak. She had long seen Daye’s corruption and hoped he could support it, or at least work together with her to do something for the Murong clan’s realm. But he rebelled, and when he joined forces with Wang Ding, perhaps it wasn’t really to preserve the state, but simply because he didn’t want to share dominion with others.
She looked at him through a hazy light and asked after a long pause: “You’ve killed so many people—when will it be my turn?”
He was surprised by her thoughts. “Why do you say such things? When have I ever wanted to kill you?”
“Haven’t you? Then where are the Chang Wei agents who left my residence?”
He was struck speechless, unable to answer. After a long while he finally said: “Who told you this? Yu Qixia or Jin Shi?”
She angrily slapped the bed board. “Are you planning to kill them too? I only have these few people left by my side, and you must drive them all to extinction?”
Initially his eyes blazed with fury, regretting that he had been too soft-hearted. But her fierce rebuke was like towering waves that instantly extinguished that spark of fire.
He raised both hands in helpless surrender. “Let’s not mention those things anymore. You haven’t eaten dinner—I had them keep it warm on the stove, and I’ll have it brought in for you now.”
He stepped back to leave, but she called out for him to come back. He immediately rushed to her bedside in a few quick steps. “I’m here. I just wanted to go tell them to prepare… If you have anything to say, speak freely. This time I’m prepared—even if you scold me bloody, I won’t talk back.”
He actually smiled, as if everything before had been just a nightmare of hers. He was putting on a show of ease, trying to numb her, but she wasn’t confused to that degree yet.
“I have no more hope for you now. I only ask one thing of you—no matter what, don’t harm the people around me anymore. They wholeheartedly protect me like family. If you kill them, it’s the same as killing me.” She looked into his eyes, almost pleadingly. “Promise me you can do this.”
He sighed. “I promise you, as long as they don’t act rashly, I absolutely won’t harm them in the slightest.” That Jin Yi Guard who had returned to report earlier had to be killed—he had come to the capital to deliver news, and he had long hated him to the bone. Now he still dared to appear breathing, perhaps carrying the Emperor’s oral decree. If he was left alive, would he teach Wanwan how to coordinate from within? Since they had already broken apart, he didn’t want her to have any more connections with the capital. She was a daughter of the Murong clan, but also a daughter-in-law of the Yuwen family. Could a brother who brought ruin to the country be more important than a husband?
But he didn’t dare explain in detail, only nodded repeatedly in agreement. “Good, good… If you say don’t kill, then I won’t kill. But we must first establish some rules—you must remain safe and sound. If anything untoward happens, it means they haven’t served you properly, and they’ll all have to be buried with you.”
Her face flushed red with anger. “Are you threatening me with this? If so, then let them return to the capital to reunite with their families.”
He somewhat roguishly evaded the issue. “If they leave, who will serve you? Better to keep them here. Otherwise you’d have to return to the prince’s mansion—would you be willing?”
She didn’t drive him away again, which gave him hope. Seeing her silence, he knew she had tacitly agreed. Fortunately there was still one thing that could restrain her—as long as she was safe, that was his greatest assurance.
He turned back to call for someone to bring in the bowl, planning to feed her personally. When the silver spoon reached her face, she stubbornly turned away. He held the covered bowl and murmured: “The physician said that although you’re physically weak, your women’s health has improved greatly compared to before, and you could conceive at any time. So you must take good care of yourself—if not for me, then for the future child. Don’t you want a child? Our own child?”
And then what? Two dynasties’ legitimate lineage—promising to pass the realm to him would create a harmonious state where Yuwen and Murong each held half, was that it?
Or perhaps he thought it was already perfect, but she didn’t think so. She no longer yearned for children as she had before. If there was one, it would instead become his legitimate means of replacement. Better to have no such child.
He probably thought that through persistent pestering, he could make her change her mind—he really underestimated her. The two armies had already clashed. She didn’t know how the battle at the front was going, but she knew that every day common people struggled on the edge of life and death. Persuading him to stop—he wouldn’t listen. What else could she do? She was already powerless. In the end, she could only share Daye’s fate.
But she wasn’t resigned to it. Suddenly she crouched down and grabbed his arm. “Can we leave all these disputes behind? Don’t worry about the battle situation ahead anymore—abandon worldly affairs and go elsewhere with me. We’ll find a good place and live our simple life in peace and harmony…” She gripped his hand tightly, tears streaming down through her sobbing. “Liang Shi, I’m begging you. I don’t want us to become enemies as husband and wife. It wasn’t easy for us to be together—we should both cherish this. Now you’ve turned against everything and put me in an impossible position. When you raised your army, why didn’t you think of me? Didn’t you know this would put me in a terrible dilemma?”
Naturally he knew. He had actually hesitated because he feared making her sad, and had considered giving up entirely. But the course of events wasn’t something he alone could control. So many generals had sworn oaths together, and he still carried his father’s generation’s aspirations—he had no way to let it go. The life she described also stirred his longing. He carried too much burden and sometimes felt tired and weary too. But not now—so many people were fighting on the battlefield ahead: his brothers, his son, his soldiers… If he left, everyone would have no way to retreat and could only fight to the death.
He said: “If you like that kind of life, as soon as the war ends, I’ll take you away. Even if the realm changes hands, I won’t be that emperor. As long as I’m with you, will that work?”
The light in her eyes gradually dimmed. He still wouldn’t give up—he wouldn’t rest until he had destroyed the Murong clan’s foundation.
She released her grip on his hand and slumped dejectedly against the bed frame. Her chest began to ache in waves, burning and churning as if to tear her apart. She lowered her eyelids and said quietly: “We’re both trying to convince each other, but it seems neither can succeed. You have your convictions, and I have my bottom line. I was too foolish to still think I could persuade you to turn back… I understand now. You shoulder three hundred thousand lives, while I bear the burden of our ancestors’ two hundred sixty years of foundation. We’re evenly matched opponents. It’s not that we don’t love each other—fate is playing tricks on us. We can only blame Heaven.”
He would rather she quarrel with him than be so calm and distant. The calmer she was, the more likely she was to be utterly heartless.
His voice carried frightened undertones, as if he dimly sensed great disaster approaching. He said tremblingly: “You’ve read extensively in the classics. Throughout history, the rise and fall of dynasties has been commonplace. You can judge ancient figures’ achievements with profound righteousness, but when things concern yourself, why are you so stubborn?”
“Because I’m a common person who can never become an instant Buddha. I praise Tang Taizong’s governing talents, yet deeply despise his killing of his brothers. A person’s merits and faults must be left for posterity to judge. Whether you’ll be called a chaotic-era hero or a rebellious minister and traitorous son will depend entirely on others’ pen tips. If you’re lucky, you might earn a mixed reputation of praise and blame. But if I unite my heart with yours, I’ll inevitably be condemned by scholars to death without end… I don’t want to be pointed at behind my back even after death. I’ve lived an upright life—I can’t bear this.”
She fell silent and said no more. Her body and soul formed a hard shell that he couldn’t break through.
He lowered himself almost to the dust. “Wanwan, do you completely disregard all our past affection?”
She turned her head away, her cold profile like icicles hanging from winter eaves, impossible to reach.
He stood there in sorrow and bewilderment, at a loss, for a very long time. She turned her back completely, no longer looking at him at all. He sighed softly. “I’ll be departing for the campaign in a couple of days. I won’t be able to see you for some time.”
She closed her eyes. Even though she didn’t want to cry, tears flowed down torrentially, soaking the mandarin duck pillow.
Departing for campaign—to attack her brother. What could she say? Even if she spoke, it might not be effective. Better to let it end here.
The sound of footsteps lingered for a while, then finally departed. Only then did she begin to sob with relief. Her body was already weak, and after such great sorrow and anger, her hands and feet trembled and she had no strength left. She thought that if this continued, it wouldn’t be long. With her frail constitution, she probably couldn’t hold on much longer.
Nanny came again, holding Dong Li with a face full of worry. “Your Highness, please look at the young master. These past two days he’s been so upset he won’t eat anything. He’s visibly lost weight.”
Wanwan sat in the round chair and belatedly raised her head. “What’s wrong?”
“I imagine he feels terrible inside.” Nanny frowned and said, “However the young master knows about what Ma Fa and Father are doing outside, you can’t take your anger out on the young master, madam. Though you don’t hit or scold him, the young master is very clever. You usually dote on him so much, but suddenly you’ve grown cold toward him—how could he not be heartbroken?”
Wanwan was slightly stunned and got up to look at the child. Indeed he had grown thin, his eyes appearing even larger than before. When he saw her, his little mouth turned down as if to cry. She quickly comforted him with a few words. He reached out wanting her to hold him. She was in a difficult position and said to Tonghuan: “Perhaps we should send him back to the prince’s mansion.”
Tonghuan disagreed. “If we send him back, they’ll mock us. Just keep the child here—at least we’ll have something in our grasp.”
Could they really use Dong Li as a hostage? She smiled bitterly and took him into her arms, tapping his little nose. “Such a tiny little person… Will you remember your lady in the future?”
A child over six months old could already drink some rice porridge. She scooped half a spoonful on the small silver spoon. He must have been truly hungry—his bright black eyes stared at it, and before it even reached him, his mouth opened first.
Ah, such an adorable little bundle was medicine that could cure all ailments. She coaxed him and rocked him. After all, she had raised him herself—how innocent he was, yet he had to suffer her displaced anger.
But while the child was tolerable, adults were another matter. Tala Shi came with inexplicable self-reproach: “That wretch Lan Zhou—Your Highness treated him so well, yet he did such things. How could it not chill people’s hearts? Since you won’t go to the prince’s mansion, the old lady also misses you but fears you resent her and is too ashamed to see you. I’m also steeling myself, hoping you won’t despise me. You and I have been together for so long—you know my temperament and character. I don’t have a trace of ill will, just hoping for our whole family to be harmonious and smooth… How have you been lately? If you have anything on your mind, tell me about it. I can at least be a human sounding board and help comfort you.”
Wanwan now saw no one as a good person, but considering how Tala Shi had served her recently, not driving her away was already showing utmost benevolence and righteousness.
Her expression was peaceful but her attitude distant. “I’m fine, you needn’t worry. There’s no need for comforting words either—I’ve heard quite enough of them.”
Tala Shi made an “oh” sound, somewhat disappointed. She then said: “Husband and wife never hold overnight grudges. You should also be understanding of the prince. This is just… unavoidable circumstances. I heard they’ve already attacked Zhending Prefecture—that’s quite an advance. Honestly, the men are being too heartless this way. Even if they don’t consider the Emperor in the capital, they should consider Your Highness…”
Tonghuan cut off her words: “Secondary Consort, please don’t add fuel to the fire. Regardless of who’s right or wrong, this is between husband and wife—what business do outsiders have interfering? You said one thing correctly—the way the prince is acting really chills people’s hearts. We originally thought that since he was raised before our mistress, with mother and son speaking of everything, he would at least learn some upright and incorruptible bearing. Who knew that as soon as he turned around he’d kick us down—doesn’t this make him an ungrateful wretch in people’s mouths? Enough, you should go back. No point dawdling here—if people later say you’re consorting with the enemy, you won’t be able to explain yourself to the prince.”
Tala Shi was choked by these few words and felt annoyed, but then took a broader view. This mistress was like a grasshopper after autumn—she couldn’t hop around for many more days. It was just verbal sparring—let her indulge herself, it wouldn’t grow flesh on her bones anyway.
She left through the second gate resentfully and saw Jin Shi, a Jin Yi Guard commander, by the door pillar. Her gaze swept across his face without a word, then she turned and walked away with a flourish.
Wanwan returned to her room and pulled out the map. She had thought Shijiazhuang could hold for a month or two, but unexpectedly in just a few days it had been breached. Daye had been at peace for over two hundred years—those soldiers had grown as lazy as maggots and didn’t even know how to fire guns. How could they compare to the well-trained Qi people? There were no capable generals in the court—they could only shrink their necks and take the beating.
She found Zhending Prefecture and pointed dejectedly: “Ahead is Hejian Prefecture, and beyond that is Baoding. If they take Tianjin Wei, they can directly assault Beijing… What’s the situation in the capital? The Emperor should be alert now, shouldn’t he?” She wept anxiously. “The ancestral foundation is about to be destroyed in his hands. If he were in front of me, I’d give him a good beating. This muddle-headed fool—he’s no kind of person at all. He’s ruined a perfectly good realm to this extent. Is it really that fate is exhausted and the dragon veins are severed?”
Yu Qixia glanced at Tonghuan and stepped forward half a pace. “Your Highness should think about what’s immediately before us. Prince Nanyuan will soon join the army, and once he reaches the front, the situation will become critical. Finding a way to obtain the tiger tally might still buy the court some time. I’m thinking—we’re anxious here, but does the Emperor know that this left half of the tally is in Prince Nanyuan’s hands? If even he doesn’t know, and some eunuch around him gets bought off and steals the right half, then Daye will truly be finished.”
Yes, this living immortal who only recognized the Supreme Lord—did he understand the importance of the tiger tally?
Wanwan pondered for a long time. “We can’t just sit and wait for death. From Zhending Prefecture to Tianjin Wei there’s more than one route. If he bypasses Baoding and attacks the capital from the northwest, when there are no garrison troops on guard, how many rounds of fierce assault could the city withstand?”
Everyone around stared at her expectantly. She bit her teeth. “Tomorrow night we’ll find a way to make him come back. We’ll say I’m gravely ill and near death—he’ll definitely stay until departure and head straight to the road without returning to his office. Then the tiger tally and troop deployment maps will be carried with him. Even if we can’t get the tiger tally, copying the deployment maps would be good.”
Xiao You said: “Pretending to be dying would be too difficult—better to pretend pregnancy. At this moment, if he heard such good news, he’d probably be so delighted he’d forget everything. We could also prepare a packet of knockout drug, knock him unconscious, and send the things out overnight. How’s this plan?”
Now they were at the end of their rope. Actually the simplest and most direct method would be to poison him to death in one go, but she couldn’t harden her heart to do it. Pretending pregnancy was rather unscrupulous, and she wasn’t very willing in her heart. But it was a good strategy—even if he was suspicious, deep down he’d still hold three parts hope. In that moment of confusion, it might give her an opportunity to exploit.