Lin Qingye turned off his phone with an expressionless face, his presence emanating an atmosphere of an impending storm. He then stood up directly and walked out.

“Where are you going?” Fu Xueming, who had barely spoken until now, suddenly asked.

Lin Qingye looked back, his gaze lowered, his facial features appearing increasingly sharp: “Why do you care?”

Fu Xueming’s tone immediately rose: “What kind of attitude is this!”

“Whatever attitude you give me, I’ll give right back.” After Lin Qingye finished speaking, he stepped out directly.

As the banquet hall door closed, he heard people around trying to calm and console Fu Xueming, as well as the harsh words bursting from Fu Xueming’s mouth—troublemaker, bastard, and similar terms.

Just a few steps out, he saw Gu Congwang leaning against the wall, talking on the phone with a face full of smiles.

Lin Qingye found it laughable, continued walking without stopping, and let out a light scoff.

That slight sneer was caught by Gu Congwang, who turned his head to look. Lin Qingye didn’t give him even half a glance, walking straight ahead, his silhouette quickly disappearing around the corner.

Xu Zhinan noticed he hadn’t responded for a while and thought it might be poor phone reception, so she said “Hello?” again.

“Mm.” Gu Congwang withdrew his gaze, “Nothing, just ran into an idiot.”

Lin Qingye hadn’t slept well the night before. After returning home, he turned off his phone and lay down on the bed.

This time he fell asleep quickly and had a dream.

He dreamed of the first time he saw Xu Zhinan.

Not at the bar, nor the time at the internet café with Qin Tang.

But earlier.

He had a huge argument with Fu Xueming and stormed out of the house, slamming the door.

At that time, he hadn’t won any awards yet, formed a band just for fun, and had no income. He was unwilling to ask Lin Guancheng for money to move out, so after leaving the Lin family’s main residence, he had nowhere to stay.

In winter, the night wind howled past, the dry cold air crept up from his ankles, with a bone-chilling coldness.

He left in a hurry, without even wearing an outer coat, the wind outlining his tall, thin figure.

At the end of the pedestrian street, there was a convenience store. Several street lamps outside were broken, making it quite dark. He bought a pack of cigarettes, strode out with his long legs, and sat down casually on a wooden bench outside.

It was then that Xu Zhinan appeared.

She had a companion beside her. Both were wearing winter school uniforms, grayish-blue, an inconspicuous and dull color, yet Lin Qingye noticed her at first glance.

Her originally fair skin was made even paler by the cold wind. She was wrapped up tightly from head to toe, fluffy snow boots crunched on the unmelted snow with a squeaking sound, and half her chin was buried in a scarf.

“Xiao Jing, where are we exactly?” Xu Zhinan held onto the arm of the girl beside her, keeping her voice very low, “It’s so dark.”

“It should be around here, but why can’t we see it?”

Neither seemed to know what they were looking for, slightly bent at the waist, walking down the street.

Suddenly, a faint meow came from the bushes nearby, so sticky and muffled that you could barely hear it if not listening carefully.

The young girl’s expression brightened, and she ran over, squatting down in front of the flowerbed. She stretched out her arms, leaning forward, and after quite some effort, managed to pick up the small kitten.

It was a small black and yellow stray cat, still very young, with a narrow face.

For humans, most prefer oval-shaped faces, but for cats, it’s the opposite—those with broader faces are even priced higher than the narrow-faced ones.

This cat wasn’t particularly attractive.

But the young girl held it in her arms, her eyes brightening, as if filled with a brilliant galaxy.

Lin Qingye sat in the darkness, a cigarette between his lips, watching coldly from the sidelines. He saw her laboriously pull something out of her school uniform pocket, wrapped in a plastic bag. When opened, it was a handful of cat food.

“Can such a small kitten eat dry cat food?” her companion asked, hands resting on her knees.

Xu Zhinan paused, then took out a light pink thermos from her bag and poured some water onto the cat food. In the dead of winter, the hot water produced a large cloud of mist.

She waited for the cat food to soften before feeding the little kitten.

“Ah Nan, it’s so pitiful, such cold weather. Why don’t we keep it?” her companion said.

Xu Zhinan shook her head: “I can’t. My mother is allergic to animal fur, so we can’t keep pets.”

“I see… Then I’ll call my mom and ask if we can keep it.”

After saying this, she took out her phone and walked to the side to call her mother.

Xu Zhinan remained squatting, taking off her gloves and gently stroking the cat’s fur. It wasn’t very soft, even a bit prickly.

Stray cats tend to be fierce. The kitten made some purring sounds, then immediately stretched out its claws to scratch.

Xu Zhinan jumped in fright, quickly withdrawing her hand, avoiding being scratched.

Still feeling startled, she immediately put her gloves back on, then puffed her cheeks and slowly exhaled.

A light chuckle came from nearby.

She turned her head to look. Because of the broken street lamps, she couldn’t see clearly, only making out a person sitting on a bench not far away, a cigarette between his lips, his hair disheveled by the wind.

Xu Zhinan couldn’t see his face clearly, nor could she tell his age.

However, he wore only a thin single layer of clothing, looking like a vagrant.

Yet his spine was straight as an arrow, like a towering mountain peak.

She narrowed her eyes, trying to see more clearly, but failed.

Although his figure didn’t seem like that of a homeless person, she had recently seen news of a vagrant freezing to death on the street. Just to be safe, she gently asked in that direction: “Um… are you cold?”

The young girl’s voice was gentle, like a spring breeze.

Lin Qingye didn’t move or speak, but because of her voice, he bit down hard on the cigarette.

Xu Zhinan noticed the cigarette ember flare briefly. She suddenly felt somewhat afraid. With the pitch-black surroundings, she picked up the cat and didn’t linger, walking back.

Her companion had just finished the call, saying her mother agreed to keep the cat, and took it from her arms.

“Who were you talking to just now?”

“Someone sitting over there.” Xu Zhinan looked back once more, then turned around, “So pitiful.”

She was walking under a lit street lamp now, the moon hanging right above her head, but her eyes were crystal clear, cleaner than moonlight.

As if silently drawing a dividing line between them—his side dark, dirty, and chaotic, while hers clean and transparent.

She was high above, like bestowing mercy on all living beings, dropping three words at him—”So pitiful.”

Lin Qingye let out a laugh, his voice sarcastic and contemptuous.

Later, Lin Qingye encountered her several more times. That night, he had seen the “Yan City First High School” emblem on her school uniform chest, knowing she studied there. Thus, he wasn’t sure if these encounters were coincidental or his deliberate plotting.

He never approached, always watching from afar.

It wasn’t exactly stalking, more like a bystander’s attitude.

She was always smiling, speaking softly and slowly with friends around her, as if life had no shadows at all.

He was a contradiction, arrogant and stubborn on one hand, resentful of her sympathetic and condescending “so pitiful,” frowning at the hint of pride hidden beneath her surface, wanting to shatter it.

On the other hand, like a beast in the muddy darkness, peering from the depths of its cave, retreating at the first sign of light.

Later, he saw a boy appear by her side.

They seemed to have a very good relationship.

Xu Zhinan’s smile when directed at him seemed even more beautiful.

The night after that day, Lin Qingye had a dream. He was skin to skin with someone, sharing body heat. He saw the face he’d seen that snowy night, those pink lips that had uttered “so pitiful” were soft and full.

But these same beautiful lips were smiling at someone else.

He bent down and bit her neck hard, tasting blood.

Then he woke up with a start.

Lin Qingye lay in bed, his chest heaving, his breathing heavy, recalling how Xu Zhinan had smiled at that boy during the day, her eyes soft, brimming with joy.

He both disdained it and was driven mad with jealousy.

Just as she had softly said, “so pitiful,” he was burned by the light in her eyes, developing a desire to conquer for the first time, and also clearly experiencing a certain unspeakable impulse for the first time.

That night he couldn’t sleep anymore, so he wrote the lyrics for “Robinia.”

Between me and the world

You are the chasm, the marsh

The deepening abyss

You are the fence, the wall

The permanent pattern on the shield

You are the maiden

I am the crawling five-legged monster

Spring bursts forth amid the interweaving of nights

You take up the gun, I become your sacrifice

…

The maiden in the lyrics became his secret.

But the maiden was too beautiful, and Qin Tang discovered her too, telling him he wanted to pursue her.

Lin Qingye scoffed, saying contemptuously without changing expression: “Then go ahead.”

Later, Qin Tang gave up in disappointment. Xu Zhinan finished high school and also entered Pingchuan University.

That night he saw her again at the bar, with her newly acquainted friends, both male and female. Lin Qingye observed coldly while Qin Tang chattered in his ear, though he barely heard what was said.

Xu Zhinan was visiting such a place for the first time, not accustomed to drinking. After a few glasses, her face was already red.

Lin Qingye noticed she went to the bathroom, and he followed unhurriedly, lit a cigarette, and leaned against the wall.

Lately, he hadn’t dreamt about Xu Zhinan for a long time, which was a good thing for him.

However, seeing her flushed, drunken appearance tonight, Lin Qingye felt a headache coming on, fearing another sleepless night.

He flicked his cigarette ash and, amid the bar’s pulsing music, heard a man’s voice using crude language. Looking toward the sound, he also saw Xu Zhinan opposite the man.

Lin Qingye’s hand holding the cigarette paused slightly, and he walked over.

“Hey.”

His voice was casual, truly just like someone passing by.

The man frowned at him: “What?”

“She’s mine,” Lin Qingye said.

His nonchalant attitude made his words hard to believe, but the man knew he was the lead vocalist of the bar’s band and didn’t dare cause trouble, so he left reluctantly.

No one knew this was premeditated; they just took it as a clichéd and boring heroic rescue.

Lin Qingye stood there, looking at Xu Zhinan for a while, then stepped forward and grabbed her arm, calmly asking: “Can you still walk?”

She looked up at him, her gaze not very clear. Lin Qingye met her eyes, his Adam’s apple sliding smoothly as he allowed desire to develop: “Want to come back with me?”

This desire consumed him. For so many years, like a beast dwelling in a dark cave, he had wanted countless times to drag her into his lair, to pull the bright and beautiful her into hell.

But she remained bright and unattainable. Until now, many years later.

His time had finally come.

Early the next morning, those lips that had called him “so pitiful,” those lips that always smiled at others, those lips he both hated and loved, trembled slightly from nervousness and crying, her eyes red as she said to him: “I’m sorry, I’ll take responsibility for you.”

Lin Qingye’s heart was squeezed tight, beating violently. He laughed wildly inside.

He did burst into laughter, leaning against the wall bare-chested, laughing so hard his chest shook, causing the ash on his cigarette to fall and scatter.

He looked at her and said lightly: “Alright, remember to take responsibility for me.”

Lin Qingye’s feelings for her had grown secretly, developing into something twisted and deformed, but no one had ever taught him how to truly care for someone.

He had always thought his feelings for Xu Zhinan were purely desire.

Even more often, he thought his feelings for Xu Zhinan were more like a game he played with himself.

After Fu Xueming argued with him and shouted for him to get out, when his mother used all sorts of vicious words on him, the young man’s already precarious self-esteem was completely crushed by Xu Zhinan’s unintentional “so pitiful.”

He became obsessed, never forgetting her expression when she said those three words.

Soft, gentle, but also sympathetic, lofty, like bestowing alms.

Lin Qingye wanted to pull her down from that sunny height, but when Xu Zhinan’s eyes reddened and she splashed water in his face that day, she returned to her former lofty self, leaving without the slightest attachment.

When Lin Qingye woke up, it was eight in the evening.

In the morning, he had a headache from not getting enough sleep; now he had a headache from sleeping too much.

He got up and washed his face with cold water.

Water droplets ran down his cheeks, falling onto the carpet.

He suddenly remembered what that fortune-teller he had met a few nights ago had said: “Your inner demon is too strong, not good for yourself, not good for others,” and her pink package that could “resolve heart matters for just five hundred.”

To eliminate inner demons, the pink package was useless; only Xu Zhinan would work.

In the end, Xu Zhinan still treated Gu Congwang to dinner at the university cafeteria.

Pingchuan University’s cafeteria was quite renowned. Xu Zhinan took him to the most popular one, not serving mass-produced meals but allowing individual orders. The seating consisted of sofas, quite similar to a restaurant.

They would usually come to this cafeteria whenever they had group project discussions.

After dinner, Xu Zhinan walked him to the south gate of the school, waiting until he got into a car and left before departing herself.

Just as she turned around, preparing to return to her dormitory, Zhao Qian and Jiang Yue appeared from nowhere, running over with suggestive smiles on their faces, not saying anything but bumping her shoulders with meaningful grins.

They had probably been secretly following the two all the way.

Xu Zhinan could tell what they were thinking just by their expressions. She couldn’t help but laugh, explaining: “It’s not what you’re thinking.”

Zhao Qian slapped her shoulder: “Come on! Tell us honestly! Who’s that handsome guy?”

“My friend, known since childhood.”

Jiang Yue’s eyes widened: “Childhood sweethearts!”

“…”

Zhao Qian smiled mischievously: “He’s quite handsome! Worth investing in!”

“It’s not like that. He usually stays abroad. I just had a meal with him today, don’t overthink it. I might have mentioned him to you before.”

Unfortunately, the two didn’t believe her.

It was well known that over all these years, countless boys had liked Xu Zhinan, but she was completely impenetrable, with a natural barrier that kept all men at a distance.

This was a rarely seen scene.

The two continued teasing Xu Zhinan with suggestive remarks as they walked back together.

At the fork in the path, Jiang Yue separated from them to go to the library, while Xu Zhinan and Zhao Qian returned to the dormitory together.

They had spent considerable time eating and chatting with Gu Congwang, and by now it was already dark.

It was finals week, everyone was busy, and the path had quieted down with few people around.

Zhao Qian teased her the entire way, until Xu Zhinan didn’t know how to explain anymore and simply fell silent.

“Ah Nan.”

A cold voice from the side.

Xu Zhinan’s footsteps halted at the sound of this voice, her heart stopping for a second as she turned to look.

Lin Qingye sat on the steps by the flowerbed, in a white shirt and black pants, a cigarette between his fingers, his features relaxed, no longer as severe as usual.

He was sitting, she was standing.

He looked up at her.

Zhao Qian, who a moment ago was still excited about the handsome guy who had appeared with Xu Zhinan, now saw the legendary Lin Qingye of Pingchuan University, who knew this other legend beside her.

And! He! Called! Her!

Ah Nan!!!!

What kind of world wonder was this!

Zhao Qian was shocked, but looking at Xu Zhinan’s expression, she didn’t seem very surprised by this.

Lin Qingye’s final syllable carried a nasal tone, using his pleasant voice that sounded both husky and gentle: “Ah Nan.”

He called her name again.

Smiling somewhat in compromise: “Be with me.”