This is where it ends
After the college entrance exam, the school suddenly lost a third of its population, becoming noticeably emptier. Eating at the school cafeteria or small shops outside was no longer as crowded as before.
Entering mid-June, the weather in Nancheng had become exceptionally hot. The cicadas began their clamorous singing, and the road surface was scorching hot from the high temperatures.
It was impossible to sleep well at night without running the air conditioner all night.
However, Zhou Anran accidentally kicked off her blanket while sleeping with the air conditioner on and caught a cold. The symptoms persisted on and off until late June before completely disappearing.
The hot weather even affected her appetite.
As soon as her cold was fully gone, Zhou Anran no longer had to force herself to eat bland food. That afternoon, she went with Yan Xingqian and the others to eat braised noodles at a small shop outside the school.
When the noodles were served, Zhou Anran mixed the seasonings evenly. She first picked up a piece of tofu puff that she had specifically asked the owner to add. Just as she took a bite, she heard Zhang Shuxian say in a low voice, “By the way, I heard this afternoon that Yin Yizhen publicly said in their classroom that she and Zong Kai are just like siblings, and asked everyone not to tease them anymore. What does she mean by this? Is she planning to start pursuing Chen Luobai? Otherwise, we’ve never seen her seriously refute rumors like this before.”
Zhou Anran’s heart tightened, and she forgot that the tofu puff had been soaking in the broth, absorbing all the juice. She choked on it immediately.
She quickly grabbed several tissues to cover her mouth and coughed several times in succession, tears coming to her eyes from the coughing.
Yan Xingqian hurriedly helped her pick up the iced lemon tea and handed it to her: “How can you be so careless?”
Zhou Anran put the straw in her mouth and took a big sip of the iced lemon tea, barely managing to suppress the spicy sensation in her throat.
“It’s rare to see Anran listening to gossip so intently that she even choked,” Zhang Shuxian teased with a smile when she saw that she was no longer coughing.
Zhou Anran didn’t know how to respond to this comment, so she just smiled at her while holding the cup, then took two more sips of iced lemon tea.
Sheng Xiaowen, however, asked curiously, “You ate lunch with us today, and you’ve been in the classroom all day. Where did you get this news from?”
Zhang Shuxian blinked: “I heard it when I went to the bathroom. A girl from Class 3 is my middle school classmate.”
Yan Xingqian ate a mouthful of braised noodles and seemed to remember something: “Speaking of which, have you noticed that Zong Kai seems to have been coming to our class much less frequently lately?”
Zhang Shuxian nodded vigorously: “Yes, yes, he used to come over often last semester. At the beginning of this semester, he often brought Yin Yizhen over, but recently it’s been Yin Yizhen coming over by herself more often, while Zong Kai hasn’t been coming much.”
Sheng Xiaowen laughed: “The way you say it makes it sound like some kind of melodramatic love triangle.”
“Haha, it’s the classic childhood friend versus newcomer scenario,” Zhang Shuxian rubbed her chin. “But all three of them are good-looking, so I’m fine with any pairing.”
Zhou Anran silently ate her tofu puff, not joining in the conversation. But whether it was because the tofu puff had soaked in the broth for too long, she tasted a mouthful of bitterness.
After finishing the braised noodles, the four of them walked back to school, chatting along the way with their unfinished drinks in hand.
Shortly after entering the school gate, Sheng Xiaowen suddenly sighed: “Ah, the first year of high school is almost over so quickly. Next semester, we don’t know if we’ll be able to eat together like this again. Our class won’t be split up, so Shuxian and Anran can still be in the same class, but Qianqian and I are planning to switch to the liberal arts track, so we don’t know which class we’ll be assigned to next semester.”
Yan Xingqian looked dejected: “Let’s not talk about this now, it’s so annoying just thinking about it. If only my science grades were a bit better, I wouldn’t want to study liberal arts at all, wuwuwu.”
Zhou Anran comforted her: “It’s okay, we’ll still be going to school together anyway.”
“That’s right, you and Anran will definitely be inseparable, and we’ll still eat together for sure,” Zhang Shuxian also consoled her. “You can just come to find us after class, we’re still in the same school, there’s nothing inconvenient about it.”
The braised noodle shop was outside the east gate. As Zhou Anran listened to her speak, her gaze habitually glanced toward the basketball court.
Even from a distance, she easily found a familiar figure on the third court in the first row.
The boy seemed to have stolen the ball from someone.
It looked a bit like Zhu Ran, but Zhou Anran wasn’t entirely sure.
Afraid of being noticed by her friends, she secretly glanced at him a few times, then quietly withdrew her gaze.
When they got closer, Zhang Shuxian finally noticed the people on the court: “Hey, hey, hey, look quickly, isn’t that Chen Luobai and the others playing basketball? Zong Kai is there too, and Yin Yizhen is watching from the side. Wow, exciting!”
Only then did Zhou Anran look over again openly.
She happened to see him jump and shoot a three-pointer.
The basketball hoop was facing away from them, so she couldn’t see if the shot went in, but she saw the boy outside the three-point line suddenly smile the next second.
The young man’s smile was full of undisguised vigor and confidence.
It must have gone in, right?
Zhang Shuxian also sighed: “Our school’s heartthrob looks handsome playing basketball. So the childhood friend winning over the newcomer is quite possible. I guess after Yin Yizhen so solemnly clarified her relationship with Zong Kai, rumors about her and Chen Luobai might start spreading in our school soon.”
Zhou Anran bit the straw, feeling that today’s iced lemon tea was particularly sour.
As Zhang Shuxian had predicted, a few days later, people at school began to speculate about the relationship between Yin Yizhen and Chen Luobai.
But perhaps because the final exams were approaching, Yin Yizhen didn’t come to their class much during this period. Even Zhang Shuxian was buried in her studies with no heart for gossip. Zhou Anran only occasionally heard someone whispering about it when she went to crowded places.
Another reason why the “rumors” didn’t spread widely was probably because, to date, Chen Luobai still hadn’t gone to Class 3 to find Yin Yizhen alone, nor had he been alone with her anywhere at school.
Clinging to this bit of comfort, Zhou Anran also immersed herself in revision.
The day before the final exams, Zhou Anran got her period.
She always felt particularly uncomfortable on the first day of her period, but fortunately, by the second day, the pain usually subsided significantly, so it shouldn’t affect this final exam too much.
However, for some reason, the pain was exceptionally severe this time, and she felt unwell all day.
After the afternoon classes ended, Yan Xingqian said she would bring food back for her, telling her to stay in the classroom and rest well.
Zhou Anran lay on her desk, forcing herself to review history exam points.
When it was almost time to change her sanitary pad, she finally got up from her chair, enduring the pain.
During the afternoon mealtime, the teaching building was always particularly quiet. Zhou Anran, holding her abdomen, slowly made her way to the bathroom. After changing, she had just stood up when she suddenly heard voices.
“The bathrooms in the teaching building are always so scarily quiet at this time every day. It’s good that you came with me, otherwise I wouldn’t dare to come in.”
It was a very sweet voice, Yin Yizhen’s.
The one who responded was Lou Yiqi. She laughed and said, “There are still people in some classrooms, and you’re just coming in to wash your hands. What’s there to be afraid of?”
“But I’m still scared,” Yin Yizhen said coquettishly.
Zhou Anran was about to open the door, but when she heard this, she stopped, afraid that suddenly opening the door might startle her. As she hesitated, the voices from outside continued, mixed with a bit of water sound.
“By the way,” Yin Yizhen said, “I asked Chen Luobai out alone after the final exams last night.”
Zhou Anran’s hand, which had already reached the door handle, suddenly froze.
Lou Yiqi’s tone sounded somewhat disapproving: “Why did you still ask him out? Didn’t I tell you not to let him see that you like him yet? Previously, all the girls who liked him were—”
The water sound stopped, and Yin Yizhen interrupted her.
“All rejected by him and kept at a distance, right? I know, but I can’t help it. I don’t want to pretend I don’t like him in front of him every day, and besides—” The girl paused, her voice filled with undisguised joy and excitement, “He agreed to meet me.”
Lou Yiqi’s voice sounded extremely shocked, several times louder than before: “He agreed to meet you?”
“Yes, he agreed to meet me.” Yin Yizhen’s voice was full of smiles. “You said before that he had never even walked alone with any girl at school, so if he agreed to go out with me alone, doesn’t that mean he probably likes me too?”
The bathroom was quiet for a few seconds before Lou Yiqi’s voice sounded: “I guess so.”
“I think so too,” Yin Yizhen said with a giggle. “So do you think I should confess to him actively that day, or wait for him to confess to me? I…”
The rest of her words faded away with the sound of footsteps.
The bathroom returned to silence.
So quiet that it seemed even the air had stagnated.
After a while, Zhou Anran slowly opened the door.
For someone who always kept his distance from girls to suddenly stop keeping distance from someone, she couldn’t think of any reason other than that he liked her.
Maybe it was because her stomach hurt too much, but as soon as she stepped out of the bathroom door, her nose suddenly felt sore.
The closer she got to the classroom, the more obvious this sourness became. She couldn’t control her emotions at all.
But when she had left the classroom earlier, He Mingyu was still there, and two other classmates were also staying to study quietly.
Zhou Anran didn’t want others to see her in this state.
She turned and stepped onto the stairs next to the classroom leading up, but each step pulled at her abdomen, making the pain even more apparent.
When she reached the empty rooftop, Zhou Anran, whether from exhaustion or pain, seemed almost unable to stand. She half-squatted near the doorway.
Her eyes blinked, and tears fell to the ground.
The rooftop of the teaching building was even quieter than the bathroom earlier. This silence gave Zhou Anran the courage to temporarily indulge herself.
She buried her face in her knees, first crying silently for a while, then eventually began to sob softly.
Consumed by these emotions and the pain in her abdomen, Zhou Anran completely failed to notice the approaching footsteps until she heard a voice above her head.
“Classmate, what’s wrong?”
It was a voice more familiar than any other.
A voice whose owner she could identify without even looking up.
A voice that, despite having spoken to her only a few times, had echoed countless times in her mind and heart.
— It was Chen Luobai’s voice.
Zhou Anran felt that her luck might not be very good.
She got her period just the day before the exam.
And right when she was at her most vulnerable, when she least wanted to encounter him, she happened to meet him alone.
Zhou Anran’s sobs suddenly ceased, her shoulders stiffening.
The ambient sounds became noticeable once more. She heard the wind on the rooftop, carrying the sultry breath of summer.
Perhaps due to her lack of response, she heard his footsteps gradually receding. At first, they were light, then grew heavier, possibly as he hurried down the stairs, before slowly fading away.
The rooftop fell silent again.
Although she hadn’t wanted him to see her in such a sorry state, Zhou Anran felt an inexplicable sense of loss upon confirming his departure.
Fearing others might come up, she dared not indulge her emotions any longer. She took a moment to compose herself, forcing her emotions under control. As she stood up, a sudden pain shot through her abdomen, and her foot tingled with numbness.
Zhou Anran struggled to her feet, only to hear rapid footsteps approaching once more.
Her heart leaped, and she instinctively looked towards the doorway—
A tall, slender youth ran in from the rooftop entrance, his school uniform billowing slightly in the wind, just as it had the first time she’d seen him.
He stopped before her, his tone noticeably different from earlier, likely because he could now see her face.
“Oh, it’s you.”
No longer the polite, distant “What’s wrong, classmate?”
The words “Oh, it’s you” carried a hint of familiarity, a small privilege afforded to her as his classmate.
But that was as far as it went.
Zhou Anran’s vision blurred again.
She didn’t want to cry in front of him, but she couldn’t help it.
“Why are you crying again?” The boy’s voice held a rare note of uncertainty as he raised his hand towards her.
Despite her blurred vision, Zhou Anran could make out the packet of tissues in his hand.
This must have been why he’d returned.
She should have guessed.
After all, he’d helped her the first time they met.
He had always been well-mannered, politely maintaining distance from all girls, yet unhesitatingly offering help when needed.
She might never meet a better boy than him in her life.
But that was as far as it could go.
Because now there was a girl he no longer wanted to keep at a distance.
Because he had someone he liked.
Chen Luobai didn’t have much of an impression of the girl before him.
On one hand, influenced by Fang Jin, he’d always had clear goals since childhood, knowing what he wanted and what he should be doing in high school. On the other hand, though it might sound conceited, the truth was that if he showed even a little extra attention to any girl at school, people would immediately start gossiping, and within days, all sorts of rumors would spread.
This was the first time he’d looked at her face.
She was quite pretty.
Fair-skinned with delicate features, her eyes were especially beautiful. Even reddened from crying, she didn’t look disheveled, but rather particularly pitiful and vulnerable.
Chen Luobai had never encountered a situation like this before.
But she was his classmate after all, and he couldn’t just walk away when she was crying so heartbrokenly.
“Is something wrong at home?”
Zhou Anran gazed at him through tear-filled eyes.
Perhaps afraid of upsetting her further, the boy’s voice was low, almost tender.
She had always hoped for some twist of fate, like finding his student ID or becoming his deskmate after a seating change, giving her a legitimate reason to talk to him.
But she never imagined the opportunity would come like this.
She didn’t know if it was heaven playing a cruel joke or punishing her for not being brave enough.
Zhou Anran knew he wasn’t asking if something was wrong at home, but why she was crying. Yet this was precisely the question she couldn’t answer.
He already had someone he liked.
That girl liked him too.
They might soon be together.
Even out of gratitude for all the times he’d helped her, she couldn’t cause him any more trouble.
But her mind was in chaos, and she couldn’t think of a suitable reason, so she just shook her head vaguely.
Chen Luobai was at a loss.
He wasn’t at all familiar with the girl in front of him and had no way to guess the reason.
Surely it couldn’t be a broken heart?
If that were the case, it wouldn’t be appropriate for him to pry further.
“Then—” Chen Luobai paused, “Is it because of the pressure from the final exams?”
Zhou Anran bit her lip, hesitated for a moment, then finally nodded.
Let him believe that.
Let Zhou Anran’s feelings for Chen Luobai remain an eternal secret, just like those two lemon soda candies, known to no one.
Chen Luobai breathed a sigh of relief.
If it was about studies, that was somewhat easier to handle.
“We haven’t even started our second year of high school yet, there’s no need to be so stressed. If the pressure is too much, why don’t you skip tonight’s self-study session—”
Whether it was his imagination or not, Chen Luobai felt that with each word he spoke, the girl in front of him seemed to cry harder.
He tried to recall what he knew about her.
He could only vaguely remember that she had always been quiet in class, rarely speaking, with a very low presence.
She seemed like quite a well-behaved girl.
Perhaps she was so well-behaved that his suggestion of skipping class had frightened her?
Chen Luobai cleared his throat lightly: “I mean, you could ask for leave from the evening self-study session. If Teacher Gao uses tonight’s session to go over problems, I can lend you my notes later?”
For a moment, Zhou Anran almost nodded.
But she couldn’t do that.
She couldn’t take advantage of his kindness, knowing he already had someone he liked, while he remained unaware of her feelings for him. It would be too underhanded.
Zhou Anran’s fingers, hanging at her side, slowly clenched, her fingertips digging into her palm. The sharp pain helped her regain some control over her emotions.
“No need,” she shook her head, choking out, “I’ll be fine after I cry it out.”
Chen Luobai: “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” Zhou Anran nodded again, her fingertips digging in deeper as she managed to say, “You can go if you have something to do.”
“Alright,” Chen Luobai felt awkward too. He held out the tissues again, “Take these tissues.”
This time, Zhou Anran didn’t refuse.
When she left the classroom, she hadn’t expected to overhear that conversation in the bathroom, so she hadn’t brought any extra tissues.
As she took the tissues, she was careful not to touch his hand.
Chen Luobai looked at her closely once more, saw that she had indeed stopped crying, and then jerked his chin towards the door: “I’ll head down first then.”
Zhou Anran clutched the tissues in her hand.
After he left, they probably wouldn’t have much more interaction.
Now that he had someone he liked, he would likely be even more careful about maintaining distance from other girls.
The sting of tears threatened again, and Zhou Anran, afraid her voice would betray her emotions, didn’t speak, just managed another small nod.
The boy didn’t say anything more, turning to stride towards the stairs.
As she saw him step into the doorway, Zhou Anran found an unexpected surge of courage and suddenly called out to him.
“Chen Luobai.”
Chen Luobai turned around.
The girl stood not far away, looking at him. She wasn’t very tall, her slender frame made even more delicate by the loose school uniform. Her eyes were still very red as if she might burst into tears again at any moment.
But she didn’t cry.
Chen Luobai saw her force an awkward smile.
Zhou Anran looked at him as if trying to etch the image of the boy deep into her heart.
She had missed the chance the first two times, but she still owed him a thank you.
Zhou Anran struggled to keep the tremor out of her voice: “Thank you.”
Chen Luobai had been so preoccupied with her crying earlier that only now did he notice the girl’s voice. It was soft and gentle, yet with a slight raspy quality, a unique and pleasant tone.
It was as if, in some fleeting moment of memory, he had attentively listened to a similar voice before.
But Chen Luobai really couldn’t remember any other interaction with her apart from today.
He might have called her once on behalf of the English teacher, but she hadn’t said a word to him then.
Perhaps he was misremembering.
“No need, I’m off,” Chen Luobai waved at her and turned to go downstairs.
The tall figure of the boy disappeared from view.
Zhou Anran clutched the tissues he had given her, slowly crouched down, and once again buried her face in her arms.
If only she had been a little braver back then, if only she had been able to call out to him and thank him as she did today, would the outcome have been different?
But that question would never have an answer now.