A mixture of bewilderment, foolishness, uncertainty, and panic spread across Daoist Mei’s face.
Empress Wu, noticing something amiss, her smile turning to suspicion, patted his hand and said, “What’s wrong? Aren’t you happy about being with a child?”
Daoist Mei finally snapped back to reality with Empress Wu’s pat, barely regaining some composure. He exhaled and asked Physician Liu with a solemn expression, “I accidentally fell today. Will it affect my health?”
Before Physician Liu could respond with a cupped-hand salute, Empress Wu wore a reproachful look, “You’ve always been so careless, never able to stay still. As a child, you were climbing roofs and tearing tiles. Now you’re married, and I thought you had become more steady!”
She then instructed Physician Liu, “Quickly, examine her thoroughly.”
After Physician Liu gave a lengthy explanation to reassure the apparent sisters—in reality, true sister and brother-in-law—he prescribed some medicine for a stable pregnancy and gave some additional instructions before withdrawing. Empress Wu then held her sister’s stiff hand and continued to lecture her.
Daoist Mei endured his ‘elder sister’s’ concern, still somewhat dazed. Every time he glanced at his belly, he would freeze, as if possessed.
Empress Wu said, “Now that you’re with a child, you shouldn’t engage in martial arts competitions anymore. I heard you often go to those two training grounds to spar with others. You can’t do that now. Hunting should also be put on hold. Take good care of your health first.”
Mei Zhuyu mustered his spirits to deal with Empress Wu, “Yes, I understand. I’ll be more careful.” He had never been able to imitate Wu Zhen’s carefree demeanor, and with this sudden news, he was shocked, happy, and flustered, unable to think of how to disguise himself in front of Empress Wu.
Empress Wu would have noticed something off about her sister even if she were blind. She frowned, looking her up and down, her gaze gradually sharpening, “What’s wrong with you?”
Mei Zhuyu: “…It’s nothing.”
As the atmosphere in the hall grew increasingly strange, Noble Consort Mei’s attendant entered with a lowered head, reporting to Noble Consort Mei that Physician Mei, Mei Zhuyu, was at the palace gate requesting an audience.
Noble Consort Mei was somewhat surprised. She didn’t meet with this nephew often but knew he had an independent personality similar to hers. Such a request for an audience was indeed rare.
As Mei Zhuyu was Noble Consort Mei’s nephew and Wu Zhen’s husband, with Wu Zhen present, Empress Wu naturally waved her hand to grant his request. While waiting for Mei Zhuyu to arrive, Empress Wu and Noble Consort Mei sat to the side, speaking softly, occasionally glancing at the silent ‘Wu Zhen’.
Not only did Empress Wu feel something was off, but Noble Consort Mei, who hadn’t spoken earlier, had also been observing this ‘Wu Zhen’ closely for a while. The more she looked, the less this ‘Wu Zhen’ seemed like Wu Zhen and more like her nephew Mei Zhuyu. When she mentioned this to Empress Wu, the Empress’s expression also became peculiar.
After the recent incident of Noble Consort Mei turning into a cat, both women immediately recalled certain supernatural legends, and their gazes toward ‘Wu Zhen’ became increasingly strange. Ultimately feeling she was too odd, there was even a hint of wariness in Empress Wu’s eyes.
What if she had been possessed by some wandering spirit or evil entity occupying her sister’s body?
When ‘Mei Zhuyu’ walked into the hall confidently, as if familiar with the place, Empress Wu glanced at him and said with an air of authority, “What brings Physician Mei here today?”
Seeing her sister, Wu Zhen instinctively smiled charmingly and cupped her hands, saying, “Of course, I miss…” Halfway through her sentence, she noticed her own body sitting nearby. Her voice faltered, and she coughed, awkwardly changing “sister” to “my wife.”
“…I miss my wife and came to fetch her.”
Empress Wu found that graceful bow is familiar, familiar enough to make her hand itch. Hearing that improper tone and seeing those spirited eyes, this was nothing like the steady brother-in-law Mei Zhuyu she knew. It seemed not only her sister was possessed, but her brother-in-law was too.
She looked at this strange couple and exchanged a glance with Noble Consort Mei, who immediately ordered all the attending palace maids to withdraw. When only the four of them remained, Empress Wu slowly said to ‘Mei Zhuyu’, “Wu Zhen, what mischief are you up to?”
Empress Wu had meant to test them, but to her surprise, ‘Mei Zhuyu’ smiled and sat down casually in front of her, praising her, “Sister, you’re indeed sharp to figure it out so quickly!”
She spoke in a coquettish tone, not even addressing her as ‘Your Highness’ but calling her ‘sister’ instead. Empress Wu was nearly choked by this tone that didn’t match the face, and after trying to hold back, she couldn’t help but exclaim, “Don’t be so frivolous with me, you’re ruining Physician Mei’s dignified appearance!”
Wu Zhen, however, didn’t mind and even smiled at the silent real Mei Zhuyu, saying, “My husband doesn’t mind.”
Although Mei Zhuyu was also uncomfortable seeing his face with such a bright smile, the body-swapping situation was already unpleasant enough. He didn’t want to restrict Wu Zhen further and let her do as she pleased.
Noble Consort Mei, observing this, summarized, “So, you two have indeed swapped bodies?”
Mei Zhuyu and Wu Zhen hadn’t expected to be summoned to the palace and have Empress Wu figure it out, so they hadn’t agreed on a story beforehand. Now that Noble Consort Mei asked, Mei Zhuyu knew he wasn’t good at making things up, so he remained silent, leaving it entirely to Wu Zhen.
Wu Zhen, true to form, could spin a tale on the spot. She composed herself and said, “It’s a long story. A few days ago, I encountered a mad Daoist priest and accidentally offended him. He casually pointed at me, saying he’d teach me a lesson. I didn’t notice anything wrong and thought he was just bluffing. Unexpectedly, today I suddenly swapped bodies with my husband. It must have been that priest’s doing.”
“I’ve just found out that the mad priest has gone to Kunzhou. I was thinking of going there with my husband to find him, at least to apologize, and perhaps ask him to help us switch back,” Wu Zhen said convincingly. Even Mei Zhuyu, who had heard a brief account from her, began to wonder if this might be the true reason.
“So, sister, I need your help. My husband’s duties at the Ministry of Justice need to be sorted out. We’ll deal with that after we return from finding the person in Kunzhou,” Wu Zhen smoothly brought up the matter.
Empress Wu didn’t know what to say to her. Out of habit, she almost pointed her finger at Wu Zhen’s forehead, but since Wu Zhen was now in Mei Zhuyu’s body, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Instead, she said sternly, “I knew it would be trouble caused by you!”
Wu Zhen, seeing that her sister wanted to hit her but couldn’t, became even more emboldened. “Sister, do you agree?”
Empress Wu, though angry, nodded, but not before scolding her for a good while. Wu Zhen, long accustomed to being lectured by her father and elder sister, let it go in one ear and out the other, not forgetting to wink at Mei Zhuyu.
Mei Zhuyu, who had almost lost his senses from the news of pregnancy, couldn’t help but smile slightly upon seeing Wu Zhen like this.
Wu Zhen watched for a moment and suddenly sighed, “I am good-looking, even when smiling.”
Seeing her sister’s improper flirtatious tone, Empress Wu wanted to break her legs. She gritted her teeth and said, “He’s carrying a child now. You better behave yourself and stop fooling around. Take good care of him on the way to Kunzhou, you hear me!”
Wu Zhen’s playful expression froze. She sat up straight, with a look of incomprehension, “What?”
Empress Wu, remembering this messy situation, didn’t know how to phrase it, “Just now, Physician Liu came to check your body’s pulse. You’re with child.”
Wu Zhen: “…”
She stared at the calm Mei Zhuyu in disbelief, her gaze shifting to his abdomen and suddenly becoming distant. She choked for a while, then finally swallowed and gave a dry laugh, “Is that so.”
Noble Consort Mei, who had been quiet all along, suddenly covered her mouth and laughed lightly. The three turned their gazes toward her, and she slowly said in a gentle voice, “The first three months of pregnancy are the most critical. Zhen is not one to stay calm, and if we let her handle it herself, it would be worrying. Although Zhuyu is younger than Zhen, he is steady and reliable. If it were him, there surely wouldn’t be any problems.”
In an instant, Empress Wu, Wu Zhen, and Mei Zhuyu were all impressed by her reasoning. Mei Zhuyu even glanced at Wu Zhen, thinking that perhaps they should wait until after this initial period before switching back, to avoid tormenting Wu Zhen too much. Physician Liu had mentioned earlier that she would need to drink some medicinal soups, and Wu Zhen disliked bitter things. Moreover, pregnant women often experience nausea and vomiting, which sound like suffering. It might be better to stay switched for now and change back after this period.
To be honest, Daoist Mei was also worried about his wife. He felt more at ease handling it himself.
Empress Wu also showed an expression of relief, saying to Noble Consort Mei, “You’re right. Letting Wu Zhen, that little monkey, handle it herself would surely lead to trouble.”
Only Wu Zhen, after careful consideration, said, “That won’t do. It’s better to switch back sooner.”
Mei Zhuyu finally spoke up to persuade her, “There’s no rush.”
Wu Zhen: “No, we must.”
She was rarely so firm and serious. Mei Zhuyu asked, “Are you uncomfortable in my body?”
Wu Zhen suddenly pouted, “Bearing a child is such a difficult task. How could I let you, my husband, do it?”
Mei Zhuyu hadn’t expected her to say this. His heart softened, and his gaze towards her became gentle, “I can’t let you suffer like this either.”
Noble Consort Mei spoke up at the right moment, “When carrying a child, one can’t jump around or fight, can’t ride fast horses, can’t eat cold foods carelessly, and must drink many nourishing soups and medicines. Physician Liu just wrote out a list…”
Wu Zhen immediately changed her tune, “Oh, then let’s stay switched for now. We’ll reconsider after we find that bored mad priest in Kunzhou.”
Making her drink those things would be like asking for her life.
As they left the palace, Wu Zhen suddenly said, “I need to leave Chang’an. I must explain the situation with the demon market to Little Snake in person. She should be at the Liu residence now. Husband, come with me.”
She revealed a mischievous smile, “Let’s give her a little scare.”
Mei Zhuyu, seeing an expression on his face that had never appeared before, didn’t know what to say. Before he could object, Wu Zhen suddenly rubbed her cheeks and sighed, “Husband, you rarely smile and show few expressions. I’ve only smiled a bit, and my face is already sore. When we switch back, I must make you smile more every day.”
Mei Zhuyu was about to say he was used to it when he heard Wu Zhen lowly say to him, “Earlier, when I used the privy, I found that it’s more convenient for men than women.”
Mei Zhuyu hesitated, “…You saw that…”
Wu Zhen nonchalantly replied, “It’s not like I haven’t seen it before. Are you still shy?”
Mei Zhuyu turned his head away as if unable to bear hearing it, covering his forehead with his hand.