Even though Gu Yan had issued what amounted to a formal ultimatum, Qi Xi still went back to his place with him, both of them carrying an unspoken understanding. On the way, Gu Yan even pulled Qi Xi by the hand into a convenience store downstairs to buy the necessary “tools for the crime.” Qi Xi was mortified the entire time—watching Gu Yan pay for condoms at the register, she wished she could vanish on the spot, cursing herself for leaving her own supply at home instead of carrying it with her. But the more she wanted to flee now, the more firmly Gu Yan held onto her, as if determined not to let her have her way.

Qi Xi was originally from Rong City, and Gu Yan’s apartment happened to be in a busy part of town. She remembered that several of her college and high school classmates used to live in this area, so every second in the convenience store was spent dreading running into someone she knew. And of course, for some reason, tonight of all nights the store was packed. Qi Xi had no choice but to stand in line behind Gu Yan holding the condoms, each minute feeling like torture.

Maybe it was simply her own guilty conscience—no one was actually paying attention to her, yet she felt so self-conscious she wanted to dig a hole and disappear. But today seemed determined to work against her: just as she was hoping to pay and leave quickly, the register broke down, forcing the line to grow even longer.

Qi Xi was practically vibrating with anxiety. She tugged at Gu Yan’s sleeve and pleaded under her breath, “Let’s just skip it, let’s go.”

But Gu Yan’s resolve didn’t waver. “No.” He leaned close to her ear, voice low. “I don’t want to make you wait any longer.”

Qi Xi wanted to die of embarrassment. She really shouldn’t have provoked him—how could this man take everything so seriously?

Every minute of waiting felt like her heart might give out. Even though she was a grown woman, well past university and already working, some childish, obedient part of her still felt that buying condoms in public was scandalous, that if she got caught she’d be scolded.

All she wanted was to leave, and without thinking about what she was saying, she used every trick she had to talk Gu Yan out of it. “It’s not like you absolutely need to buy this to do it—we could just not use one. Don’t buy it, Gu Yan, let’s just go.”

The moment the words left her mouth, Gu Yan yanked her hard into his arms, one hand locking firmly around her waist. He leaned in close to her ear, his voice low and clenched with restraint. “Qi Xi. This is a convenience store. There are a lot of people here.”

His eyes had gone faintly red, as if his patience had finally run out. “Do you know what could happen if we don’t buy it?”

Before she could respond, he leaned in again, breath warm against her ear. “You could get pregnant.”

His lips hadn’t even touched her ear, but Qi Xi felt as though she’d been struck by electricity. Heat spread through her entire body; she felt like steam rising off a pot, weightless, about to evaporate.

But Gu Yan didn’t seem satisfied yet. As if delivering a solemn lecture while calmly urging her to keep waiting in line, he analyzed the situation in a low, composed voice. “It wouldn’t matter much to me—I wouldn’t mind. Marrying you and having children with you was always my dream anyway. But for you, it might affect your career…”

What on earth was this man talking about?

Qi Xi felt like she was losing her mind.

What kind of person was Gu Yan?!

Pregnant!

They hadn’t even done anything yet!

Pregnant with what?!

And besides, was pregnancy really that easy to come by? Did he think this was some novel or drama where one night guaranteed results? These days infertility was everywhere, fertility clinics had waiting lists a mile long! Getting pregnant wasn’t something that just happened on command!

Fortunately, the people in line ahead of and behind them were both wearing earbuds, absorbed in short videos, completely oblivious to the whispered exchange between this young couple.

After what felt to Qi Xi like an unbearably long wait, it was finally Gu Yan’s turn to pay.

Throughout the entire process, Qi Xi kept her head down, mask on, and was eventually led away by Gu Yan in something of a daze, walking some distance without quite registering it.

When she came back to her senses, she realized they’d already arrived at the door of Gu Yan’s apartment.

Watching him unlock the door, she thought back to what had happened at this very entrance before, and felt her face flush. But this time Gu Yan didn’t kiss her—he simply opened the door as if everything were perfectly normal. The motion-sensor light flicked on again, and in its warm, ambiguous glow, Gu Yan turned back to look at her, his tone calm and natural.

“I bought you slippers.”

The two of them seemed like they’d come to his place to work overtime—one moment they’d been buying condoms together, the next they were suddenly the picture of restraint and propriety.

But once Qi Xi put the slippers on, she noticed Gu Yan’s little scheme—he’d bought matching couple’s slippers.

Looking around, she realized many small items in his apartment had been swapped for matching couple’s versions. Subtle, but clearly premeditated. When she went to the bathroom, she found he’d even prepared two matching sets of toiletries.

Gu Yan was still in the kitchen. “Qi Xi, want me to pour you some water?”

She came out of the bathroom and leaned against the living room wall, watching him. He looked striking and refined, and the sight of him pouring water for her in such a domestic manner made him seem gentle and steady all at once. The kitchen light made his already fair skin seem even more luminous. There was something clean about him that made her want to explore further.

Last time, nothing had been planned in advance, but maybe that was precisely why both of them had been able to let go more, indulging in the moment without a fixed direction.

But today…

Today, precisely because they both knew—unspoken—what was likely to happen, they’d both become awkwardly formal with each other.

But…

They’d already come this far.

Gu Yan’s gaze had clearly already been drifting across her face and down to her chest, yet he still managed to ask with feigned seriousness, “Are you thirsty?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll get it for you, then.”

But a mischievous urge suddenly seized Qi Xi. She put on her sweetest voice. “I don’t want to drink it myself.”

Confusion flickered across his face.

She bit her lip, pointed at his mouth, and said imperiously, “I want you to feed it to me.”

He seemed to need a moment to process what she meant, then set down the glass.

Qi Xi felt a flicker of annoyance—she thought he was being far too proper today. She’d practically handed him the perfect excuse, and he still wasn’t taking advantage of feeding her water to kiss her…

But her annoyance didn’t last long. Just as she frowned and turned to walk away, Gu Yan pulled her back almost roughly. He never did feed her the water—he simply bent down and kissed her.

Between kisses, breathless, he brushed his nose against hers. “Silly girl, why would I need an excuse? If I want to kiss you, I just kiss you.”

“It’s just that—”

But she never got to finish the sentence; her voice dissolved into his mouth.

Neither of them quite knew how it happened, but what had started stiff and formal turned clingy and inseparable the moment they were in each other’s arms. Qi Xi, harboring a competitive streak about kissing, felt no fear at all this time. If last time she’d been the one mostly on the receiving end, this time she took the initiative, her tongue slipping nimbly between his lips, driving him to distraction before teasingly pulling away again.

But with many things, even when you start with impure motives and a competitive edge, once you’re too invested, everything gradually spirals out of control…

Qi Xi grew hot all over from his kisses, unfamiliar, trembling sensations rising inside her. Her body felt split in two—one part still hers, another seemingly defecting to his side.

She could feel his hands, his touch, his movements working steadily upward, as if tracing lines across a blank sheet of paper.

But she wasn’t entirely a blank page.

When his hand moved further up, the unimpeded softness he found made him pause, looking at her in surprise, his breathing turning ragged. “Qi Xi, why—you’re not wearing—”

She pressed her hand over his through the fabric, trapping it there, like a criminal caught red-handed at the scene, sentenced on the spot against her own chest. She bit his ear. “I took it off earlier, when I went to the bathroom.”

She looked at him with damp eyes. “Didn’t I tell you I’m very soft-hearted? So—am I soft enough?”

…

As it turned out, both Qi Xi’s heart and her body were indeed very soft—while Gu Yan, in every sense, was very hard. Exactly how hard, Qi Xi was certain she now understood with complete clarity, having spent an entire night finding out.

By the end, her voice had taken on a tearful edge, faint nasal whimpers full of aggrieved longing, so unfamiliar even to herself—long, drawn-out, soft and coy, as if she’d received too much, and yet somehow not enough.

The first time, Gu Yan had still retained enough presence of mind to remember to use the “tools for the crime” from the convenience store. The second time, both of them lost themselves so completely that he forgot entirely. By the time Qi Xi realized he hadn’t used anything, it was already too late.

So what was the point of standing in that line?

In the end, it hadn’t even mattered.

Qi Xi felt utterly wronged. She decided Gu Yan wasn’t a good person at all—in certain respects, he was downright vicious.

If anyone asked how she felt, the honest answer was regret. Deep regret. She never should have felt so pleased with herself and gone and provoked him. This wasn’t provoking—this was suicide, this was outright defiance, this was ignorance mistaken for courage.