What Qing Yu found most comfortable about Wang Mumu was that she never deliberately avoided mentioning Ming Sheng in their conversations. Of course, she never brought up what happened during the winter break either. This, Qing Yu thought, was the correct way to “forget” – neither avoiding nor looking back, just carrying on as usual.
After gaining Li Fanghao’s trust, Wang Mumu often came over in the evenings. In Li Fanghao’s eyes, as an exemplary student approaching the college entrance examination, Wang Mumu was only seeking a quieter study environment with Qing Yu.
Indeed, besides studying together, they went nowhere else. Wang Mumu’s dedicated studying set a good example for the occasionally distracted Qing Yu. Qing Yu admired Wang Mumu greatly – she was praised by everyone at school, and even in the eyes of the extremely critical Li Fanghao, she was perfect.
In mid-April, the school organized a spring outing for first and second-year students. Qing Yu asked for leave from Teacher Sun Yinglong without consulting Li Fanghao first and told Wang Mumu about it.
“Why aren’t you going?” Wang Mumu asked without looking up from her test papers. “It would be such a waste to miss this beautiful spring weather, and besides, you’ll regret it when you’re older and look at the group photos without you in them.”
This was what made her different from others – sincere, thoughtful, and forward-thinking. She never used simple reasons like “having fun with classmates” to persuade Qing Yu.
“Also,” she looked up, blinking cheerfully, “spring outings usually end at school around two or three, with no classes afterward. Doesn’t your mom pick you up at five?”
This made Qing Yu seriously consider it. On Thursday, after hesitating all day, she finally made up her mind and ran to tell Teacher Sun that she had changed her mind.
“That’s more like it,” Teacher Sun smiled reassuringly. “Here, borrow my point-and-shoot camera. Don’t just hide away reading tomorrow – take pictures of your classmates and the scenery!”
On the day of the spring outing, the small camera hung from Qing Yu’s neck like a slightly heavy lock. To not disappoint Teacher Sun’s kindness, she had to pull her thoughts back from their usual tendency to withdraw from the crowd, opening her eyes wide to observe the people and scenes around her, and raising the camera at appropriate moments. At first, she worried about accidentally meeting Ming Sheng’s eyes while looking around, but she soon realized her concerns were unnecessary – Ming Sheng had disappeared since they started climbing the mountain, reportedly joining the first-year Class 6 group with some basketball team members.
That was Su Tian’s class. Qing Yu overheard Deng Meixi and Guan Lan talking behind her about how Su Tian’s family was going to pay for renovating the school gymnasium, their words full of disdain.
“She thinks she can buy everything with money,” Deng Meixi kicked stones while walking. “She might as well broadcast her good relationship with Ming Sheng through a megaphone every day.”
“Well, they are pretty close now,” Guan Lan was always straightforward.
“She’s close with all the boys on the basketball team,” Deng Meixi mocked. “And with any girl willing to submit to her.”
“But think about it, isn’t it Su Tian who comes to our class more often?” Guan Lan said. “Ming Sheng hardly bothers going downstairs to find her.”
“Whatever,” Deng Meixi sighed, though she suddenly sounded much happier. “Appearance-wise, she is quite pretty, much prettier than Sister Mumu.”
“That’s because she knows how to dress up and has money,” Guan Lan said. “Besides, Sister Mumu doesn’t need to please Ming Sheng, their relationship is already solid enough.”
“I heard they haven’t talked for a long time,” Deng Meixi said. “Ming Sheng’s family has rented out their old house in Chaoyang Village, he doesn’t plan to go back there anymore.”
“No, they have phones now, sis and Sister Mumu is about to take the college entrance exam – how would she have time to maintain relationships with Ming Sheng? Of course, he won’t go back now that the house is rented out. You think they’re like girlfriends who need to stick together all the time?”
Deng Meixi pushed Guan Lan, laughing, “Are you saying I’m always clinging to you?”
“Aren’t you?” Guan Lan laughed loudly. “You can’t live without me!”
They burst into laughter, then started imitating Su Tian’s overly sweet, drawn-out voice when calling Ming Sheng.
“Do you think Ming Sheng falls for this?” Deng Meixi asked.
“A man’s love either comes from a desire to protect or to conquer,” Guan Lan spoke knowingly. “Su Tian desperately wants to be the queen bee among girls and throws herself at him – that must mean nothing to Ming Sheng.”
“Girls who appear fragile but are stronger than him have a better chance,” Guan Lan continued after a pause. “Like you – petite, cute, and delicate, but with such good grades that he can never surpass.”
Deng Meixi hit her in embarrassment, and their playful banter finally moved away from the topic of Ming Sheng. Qing Yu remembered last year’s events – Su Tian’s deliberate difficulties and Deng Meixi’s public accusations, all related to Ming Sheng. Now Deng Meixi freely discussed Ming Sheng behind her back while ignoring her existence, showing that in their eyes, she and Ming Sheng were completely disconnected.
At lunchtime, they stopped at a relatively open area on the mountaintop. Qing Yu found a corner and sat down alone. While reviewing photos on the camera, someone tapped her shoulder – it was Jiang Nian.
They hadn’t spoken privately since the new semester began, and Qing Yu had assumed their fragile friendship had ended. Jiang Nian’s sudden appearance made her slightly uncomfortable.
“You haven’t changed your name?” Jiang Nian bent down with a smile.
Qing Yu shook her head.
“Why aren’t you sitting with us?” Jiang Nian pointed to a spot nearby. Following her gesture, Qing Yu saw a group of students chatting and laughing around Teacher Sun.
“Teacher Sun specifically asked me to call you,” Jiang Nian said, starting to pull Qing Yu’s arm. “Come on, nobody judges you. Everyone has family issues – why do you always isolate yourself?”
The logic was sound, but the words didn’t sit well with Qing Yu. She smiled apologetically and briefly declined Jiang Nian’s invitation.
Jiang Nian gave her a helpless look: “Well, I’ll head back then. If you need anything, just let me know.”
After she left, Qing Yu felt relieved, though her mood inevitably turned gloomy. Still caring about others’ opinions, after all, she thought. Being detached and independent – how easy was that?
After lunch came the group photo. The formation and poses were casual. Qing Yu waited until everyone had settled before hurrying to the edge, tilting her head to peek out between the numerous V-signs raised in front. Just as the photographer called out “1, 2, 3,” she felt a sudden gust of wind from behind – someone had appeared out of nowhere and nearly crashed into her while making an emergency stop.
As she struggled to maintain her balance, the camera clicked three times, and everyone shouted “cheese” in unison.
“Wow, you remembered to come back!” she heard Chen Shen shouting from behind her side.
Qing Yu immediately guessed who it was, but couldn’t stop herself from turning around. In that second when her eyes met Ming Sheng’s, a volcano erupted inside her.
“School ends early today, want to go karaoke?” Chen Shen put his arm around Ming Sheng’s shoulder. “I’ve asked you so many times, you’ve got to give me face sometime.”
“Sure,” Ming Sheng’s voice was unusually loud, so much so that Qing Yu could hear him even after walking away. “Let’s invite Deng Meixi too.”
“I saw an eagle,” Qing Yu said when Wang Mumu asked her that evening how the spring outing was. Wang Mumu paused slightly, probing: “Not happy?”
“I am happy,” Qing Yu smiled. “The eagle’s soaring was mesmerizing.”
Wang Mumu was puzzled: “What are you trying to say?”
“Eagles must be the freest creatures in the world,” Qing Yu said. “Today on the mountaintop, I realized I wasn’t that far from a soaring eagle.”
“What happened on the mountaintop?”
“An eagle appeared from nowhere, flying low, back and forth several times, frightening everyone into screaming and scattering,” Qing Yu smiled. “But I wasn’t nervous at all. Seeing its powerful wings made me feel incredibly inspired.”
Wang Mumu put down her pen: “That’s it?”
“Yes.”
“Eagles are predators,” she picked up her pen again, copying vocabulary words while speaking. “It probably felt you were intruding on its territory and wanted to attack.”
“No,” Qing Yu shook her head. “It was just purely showing off its strength.”
As she said this, Ming Sheng’s words “Invite Deng Meixi” echoed in her mind. How ridiculous that she would care, that she would spend the whole afternoon analyzing his true intentions. He enjoyed hovering among girls, basking in everyone’s attention, as frivolous as a wild predator – just let him be.
“Tell me,” Qing Yu wandered through her chaotic thoughts, “Eagles live alone, right?”
“Don’t know,” Wang Mumu responded absent-mindedly, turning a page in her notebook.
“Do they feel lonely?”
“Loneliness is a philosophical concept, a human trait,” Wang Mumu said. “Eagles aren’t human.”
“Eagles are lonely,” Qing Yu suddenly felt melancholic. “Freedom and strength don’t help. Every eagle is lonely.”
Wang Mumu stopped writing and ruffled Qing Yu’s hair: “Girl, if you keep being so philosophical and cryptic, I’ll think you’re referring to something else.”
“Referring to what?”
“Ming Sheng.”
Qing Yu froze, and Wang Mumu burst out laughing.
“Just tell me honestly what happened between you two today.”
“Nothing.”
“Fine,” Wang Mumu shrugged. “You might fool me, but you can’t fool yourself.”
It was just a one-second eye contact, nothing worth mentioning, Qing Yu thought. She felt ashamed of dwelling on that glance and her unsettled heart.
“Although you rejected him early on, I understand that human emotions are complex,” Wang Mumu looked at the desk, her bright eyes losing focus. “If I were you, I wouldn’t be happy either seeing him develop interest in other girls so quickly.”
“I don’t understand him anymore,” she suddenly looked back at Qing Yu with an exasperated expression. “I feel like my previous understanding of him was completely wrong. He’s becoming more and more like a self-satisfied, vain, shallow playboy. Everyone in his family is impressive but keeps a low profile, but he? He’s completely forgotten his grandfather’s teachings! Smoking, drinking, and flirting with several girls! How is he any different from those good-for-nothings outside school?”
Wang Mumu’s description of Ming Sheng was too harsh, but Qing Yu found it satisfying to hear.
“You haven’t lost anything, don’t feel regretful,” Wang Mumu held Qing Yu’s hand, speaking seriously. “A girl’s true feelings should be saved for the one who can accompany her to the end, the one who truly deserves it.”
Qing Yu pressed her lips together noncommittally.
“I originally thought we three could become good friends, but now it seems we need to distance ourselves from him,” Wang Mumu continued. “Otherwise, he might introduce us to those good-for-nothings.”
That was overthinking it, Qing Yu thought. Ming Sheng wouldn’t wait for them to act – he had already silently distanced himself from Chaoyang Village and them, the pitiful ones who belonged there.
Because he was an eagle. His freedom, grace, and boldness would make everyone forgive his playboy lifestyle.