Unable to answer Lu Chang’s question immediately, Jian Mingshu could only blink.
He wore a light blue scholar’s robe, the standard attire issued by Mingde Academy before enrollment. After three years of wear, it had faded to white. On his feet were cloth shoes with thousand-layer soles made by Aunt Zeng. He carried no fan pouch, his hair neatly bound in a headset, revealing his clean-cut, handsome face with particularly bright, clear eyes.
Jian Mingshu loved looking at him. Though he had no fine possessions about him, his neat and clean appearance was pleasing to the eye.
Little Qingting felt indignant on her mistress’s behalf.
At home, her mistress was usually decisive and sharp-tongued, yet before Lu Chang, all her skills seemed to desert her. Whatever spell Lu Chang had cast on her was truly frustrating to watch.
After a moment of silence, Jian Mingshu awkwardly changed the subject, “Why are you still wearing old clothes? Didn’t I have some new ones sent to you the other day?”
Lu Chang rarely accepted gifts from the Jian family, and knowing his temperament, Jian Mingshu seldom sent any. Even today’s offerings were just medicinal herbs that Aunt Zeng regularly used. Thinking today would be his day of success, she had sent two sets of cotton clothes he typically wore a few days ago, deliberately choosing simple fabric to avoid his rejection.
Before Lu Chang could answer, Little Qingting leaned close to her mistress’s ear and whispered with an odd expression, “Young Miss, the clothes were returned yesterday.”
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” Jian Mingshu replied in embarrassment, also whispering through gritted teeth.
“I didn’t want to upset you,” Little Qingting said worriedly.
Seeing the mistress and maid whispering to each other, Lu Chang paid them no mind and walked toward the house, asking as he went, “Do you have business at my home?”
Jian Mingshu quickly dropped the matter of clothes and said, “I heard Aunt Zeng’s old ailment was acting up, so I came to check on her.” Then, noticing his back, she asked, “Lu Chang, wait—your clothes are covered in dust, where did you get them from?”
Lu Chang turned his head to look—indeed, there was a large patch of dust on his shoulder and back. He raised his hand to brush it off, but couldn’t reach some spots. Jian Mingshu reached out to help—but before she could touch his clothes, he waved her hand away.
“Don’t trouble yourself. This dust…” Lu Chang said with a displeased expression, “This is from your father’s doing.”
She had unknowingly touched upon a sore subject.
He had gone to see the posted results at the county office, only to be caught by Master Jian who had been waiting below the notice board, nearly getting tricked into going to the Jian residence. He had barely managed to slip away during a brief moment of distraction, getting his clothes dirty in his hasty escape. Though he had tried to clean up before coming home, some spots had been missed.
“My father?” Jian Mingshu’s eyes suddenly lit up as she made the connection, “You passed the examination! What rank?”
Lu Chang rubbed his forehead—Jian Mingshu’s mind worked differently from others. Where most would be embarrassed by such words, she seemed to miss the point entirely.
Not wanting to answer her, he walked straight toward the house, saying, “Thank you for your concern, but my mother’s illness has already improved. She just needs rest. Please take your leave.”
Though Jian Mingshu was usually good at reading people’s expressions, she stopped with slightly downcast brows, looking dejected. But then she heard Lu Chang call out, “Wait!” Her eyes immediately brightened again as she looked at him with sparkling enthusiasm.
“There are some things I need to make clear to you. These years, I’m deeply grateful for the Jian family’s care, and I will surely repay it in the future.” Lu Chang had carefully considered his words before speaking, but when he met her bright, shining eyes, the words suddenly became difficult to say.
Counting the years, they had known each other for ten years, since the day he moved to Jiangning.
He paused before hardening his heart to continue, “But you and I…”
Unfortunately, his words were interrupted.
“Is that Ah Chang who’s returned?”
The door opened from inside, and the speaker stood supporting herself against it. She wore plain clothes with a dark brown outer garment and a matching headscarf. Despite this, her beauty was remarkable—fine eyebrows, apricot-shaped eyes gentle as water. Though nearly forty, she still retained her grace. This was Lu Chang’s mother.
“Mother.” Lu Chang quickly stepped forward.
But Madam Zeng had already spotted Jian Mingshu and immediately smiled, “Mingshu is here too! Come in quickly and sit, it’s cold outside.”
“Yes, of course.” Jian Mingshu smiled brightly as she went forward to take Madam Zeng’s arm, warmly helping her into the house.
Jian Mingshu had known Madam Zeng even before meeting Lu Chang.
It was a long story. Madam Zeng was from Wuhu, widowed young, and raising Lu Chang alone. When Lu Chang was seven, floods submerged the entire city of Wuhu. Madam Zeng fled with Lu Chang, wandering as refugees for two years before finally settling in Jiangning County. In their first few years there, Madam Zeng sold wontons in the street during the day and did embroidery work at night to make ends meet. The excessive labor took its toll on her health, and she fell ill after a few years. Fortunately, by then Lu Chang could help support the household. He proved especially capable, passing the county examination with top marks and being specially admitted to Mingde Academy, which waived his tuition and even gave him work copying books for the school. This helped mother and son survive those difficult years.
Jian Mingshu had met Madam Zeng because of her embroidery work.
At that time, Mingshu’s mother was still alive and had admired Madam Zeng’s embroidery skills. Taking pity on her circumstances, she had given her the household’s embroidery work. Later, when Mingshu’s mother fell gravely ill, Madam Zeng, grateful for her kindness, often visited the Jian household to keep her company and chat. She had also looked after Mingshu for a time, which led to Mingshu and Lu Chang becoming familiar with each other.
She still remembers when she was nine and her mother passed away. Her father was too busy with the funeral arrangements to care for her. As she stood numbly before her mother’s spirit tablet, it was Lu Chang who noticed her distress, took her to the back courtyard, wiped her tears, and gently consoled her… He had once been such a gentle person, but that gentleness had been worn away by time—perhaps even he had forgotten it.
After her mother’s death, Madam Zeng avoided visiting the Jian household to prevent gossip, and Mingshu’s opportunities to see them became fewer. She couldn’t pinpoint exactly when they had grown distant.
Counting on her fingers, she and Lu Chang had known each other for ten years now.
They had met as children, grown up together, and now she had passed her coming-of-age ceremony, while he was approaching his twentieth year.
Ten years had passed swiftly, and their childhood innocence had changed.
Madam Zeng’s fondness for Jian Mingshu was evident on her face, no attempt to hide it.
As soon as Jian Mingshu entered the house, she was made to sit down. Madam Zeng ordered Lu Chang to boil water and serve tea, treating him like a servant. Though Lu Chang was reserved and unsmiling with others, he was extremely gentle with his widowed mother, setting aside his cold demeanor to prepare tea for the two women.
After they had chatted briefly, Lu Chang brought the tea. Madam Zeng noticed Jian Mingshu stealing glances at Lu Chang and sighed imperceptibly. How could she not see the child’s feelings? Though Lu Chang was obedient to her in small matters, he never yielded to blind filial piety in important ones.
She, as his mother, had no say in his life’s major decisions.
“Brother Lu has achieved success in the provincial examinations—congratulations! But what was his ranking?” After chatting with Madam Zeng about family matters for a while, Jian Mingshu finally brought the topic to Lu Chang.
“Ah Chang, you passed the examination?” Only then did Madam Zeng remember today was when the results were posted.
Lu Chang placed a small plate of peeled chestnuts on the table and glanced at Madam Zeng—she might not be his birth mother; Jian Mingshu seemed more like her daughter.
“Yes, I’m the Provincial Graduate First.”
“Provincial Graduate First? What rank is that?” Madam Zeng couldn’t quite process it and looked questioningly at Jian Mingshu.
“Provincial Graduate First is… the top rank of all candidates…” Jian Mingshu felt dizzy and light-headed. Seeing Lu Chang’s calm demeanor made her almost believe it wasn’t a big deal, but as the words left her mouth, she suddenly came to her senses and stood up from her chair, “Brother Lu is the Provincial Graduate First!”
She nearly knocked over the chestnuts on the table, and Lu Chang had to steady it firmly—looking at her reaction, one might think she was the one who had achieved the honor.
“F-f-first place?” Madam Zeng started stammering and also stood up, “I must go light some incense! Ah Chang, keep Mingshu company.”
Madam Zeng left as quickly as she spoke, leaving Lu Chang and Jian Mingshu alone in the room.
Lu Chang remained silent. Though it was a joyous occasion, the atmosphere grew cold again.
After a moment of silence, Jian Mingshu asked, “The metropolitan examination is next March, and it’s already mid-autumn now. Time is short—when do you plan to leave for the capital? Before or after the New Year?”
“I’ll set out before the New Year. Spring brings too much rain and snow, making travel difficult.” Lu Chang pushed the plate of chestnuts toward her, “Have some chestnuts.”
“That makes sense. Setting out earlier brings peace of mind. Do you have enough travel money?” Jian Mingshu picked up a chestnut—it was sweet and tender, peeled clean of its inner skin by his own hands.
“I’ve saved some over the years, and with the travel allowance from the prefecture, it should be enough,” Lu Chang replied.
“The journey to Bianjing is long, and it will be the cold end of the year. You must pack plenty of warm clothes and emergency medicines in case you fall ill with no doctor nearby. I’ll look after Aunt Zeng, so don’t worry.” Jian Mingshu began planning for him, then suddenly remembered something, “Wait, since you’re the Provincial Graduate First, shouldn’t the prefecture arrange your journey to the capital, as is customary? Why do you need to travel alone?”
“Because I plan to take my mother to the capital with me, to settle there early.”
With just this one sentence, Jian Mingshu’s hand froze in mid-air, the chestnut falling back to the plate.
“Taking Aunt Zeng with you?” she repeated, “You’re not planning to return to Jiangning?”
“No, I won’t be coming back,” Lu Chang said quietly. “This is what I wanted to tell you earlier.”
Jian Mingshu lowered her head to look at the plate of chestnuts he had carefully peeled, saying nothing.
“The Jian family has cared for us for so many years, and I have no way to repay you now. I offer my thanks first, and if the opportunity arises in the future, I will surely repay this debt.” As he spoke, he stood up and bowed deeply to her.
Though he had worked at the academy, his earnings barely covered daily expenses. When his mother had been seriously ill, the medical and medicine costs were considerable, all borrowed from the Jian family. Though he had repaid all the money over the years, the debt of gratitude remained. Moreover, there was all the help Mingshu’s mother had given his family when she was alive, and later, Master Jian’s donations to Mingde Academy to nurture scholars, including him, in hopes of gaining a noble son-in-law.
Regardless of Master Jian’s intentions, Lu Chang’s debt to the Jian family was real. One should repay a drop of kindness with a fountain of gratitude, and he was willing to repay this debt.
But the debt was debt—he was unwilling to repay it with his life’s happiness.
“Lu Chang, has our relationship become so formal that only debts of gratitude remain?” Jian Mingshu slowly raised her head, her dark eyes still bright. “Or do you see me just like my father, someone who craves wealth and glory, being kind to you only to secure a noble son-in-law?”
Now it was Lu Chang’s turn to lower his head—Jian Mingshu’s clear gaze was like a mirror, reflecting his true self.
“I don’t think that way. Don’t overthink it.”
“Really?” Jian Mingshu smiled, “Lu Chang, we’ve known each other for ten years. Do you think I don’t know what’s in your heart? I admit my father has been seeking to climb the social ladder these years. It’s understandable that you fear him using his kindness to pressure you and don’t want to be used. But what about our friendship since childhood? You don’t trust even that, keeping your distance and avoiding me like a snake or scorpion.”
“I’m not.” Lu Chang looked up, gazing at her intently. “Boys and girls should sit apart at age six. You’ve come of age now—it’s proper that we maintain distance.”
“Then let me ask you…” Jian Mingshu met his gaze without flinching, “Setting aside everything from the past, if I weren’t a daughter of the Jian family, would you be willing to marry me?”
Since they were speaking frankly, they might as well be completely clear.
“You’re a daughter raised in gold and jade. Whether past or present, I’m not worthy of you, nor do I aspire to reach above my station,” Lu Chang replied without hesitation.
“I understand now.” Jian Mingshu’s expression remained unchanged, though she gripped her collar tightly before raising the cup of tea he had just poured, making a toast, “You have lofty ambitions, and I shall not detain you. Let this tea serve as wine for my farewell. We shall not meet again. May your future years be like bamboo, rising ever higher, with success in all endeavors.”
With these words, she drained the tea in one gulp.
Lu Chang frowned and was about to speak when the sound of gongs and drums erupted outside. Opening the door, he saw that because he had run away too quickly from the examination hall earlier, the county officials hadn’t had a chance to congratulate him. Now they had arrived with a crowd of common people to offer their congratulations.
He looked out for a moment, then turned back to find Jian Mingshu.
The humble room was empty, with only a cold teacup remaining on the table.
Jian Mingshu had already left through the back of the house.
After ten years, Jiangning was still not his home, and she was merely a passing traveler in his life.
[Author’s Note: The custom of “catching a son-in-law” was popular during the Song Dynasty, and the story borrows from this marriage custom. Interested readers can look it up.
Regarding some readers’ questions about why the male lead treats the female lead poorly despite her family’s help—that’s not the case. He treats all women this way, which is why Mingshu feels so confident about his response to feminine wiles. Of course, it can’t be denied that he does have some prejudice against her family because of her father’s actions.]