Ming Shu didn’t need to turn around to feel the suddenly chilling atmosphere around her. She remembered how Lu Chang had once told her to stay away from Song Qing Zhao, and now she had revealed this matter to him – she must have stabbed him in the heart again. She felt somewhat regretful.
But words once spoken, like water spilled, cannot be taken back.
“Brother…” Ming Shu tested cautiously.
Lu Chang’s voice was very calm: “We’ll discuss this at home.”
Ming Shu closed her mouth, feeling the fear of facing an elder’s interrogation, but simultaneously, she felt some anticipation. These were contradictory emotions – she feared Lu Chang’s questioning, yet… she very much wanted to know his thoughts. Within this anticipation was even some inexplicable, unreasonable secret joy.
She thought she was quite strange.
Lu Chang gripped the reins tightly, wishing he could gallop wildly and let the whistling wind blow away the gloom in his heart. But their route passed through busy markets, and even though he tried to choose less crowded streets and alleys, he couldn’t gallop through the streets.
The horse walked steadily, but his heart felt like a hundred horses were stampeding through it.
The siblings returned home, each caught in their own peculiar emotions.
—
Ming Shu followed Lu Chang into the room, conscientiously closing the door. Madam Zeng was cooking downstairs and wouldn’t disturb them. The street-facing attic wasn’t quiet, filled with various street noises, but these sounds now became a natural barrier.
Most of Lu Chang’s belongings were already packed, with only bedding and such remaining. Several boxes were stacked together. Lu Chang sat on one of the boxes and pulled out a chair, saying to Ming Shu: “Sit.”
“…” Ming Shu felt his interrogation setup had quite the official’s air.
“Want some water?” Lu Chang reached his long arm to the table to light the clay stove for boiling water.
Ming Shu felt her heart was like the small copper kettle on the clay stove – though Lu Chang hadn’t said anything, his attitude could even be called gentle, yet somehow she felt completely unsettled.
“Brother, I think it might have been my imagination. Let’s forget it, let’s not discuss this,” Ming Shu said uncomfortably, wanting to end the topic.
“What made you think Song Qing Zhao likes you?” However, Lu Chang followed her words with a question, stretching out his leg.
His long leg blocked Ming Shu’s escape route.
“Well…” Ming Shu wracked her brain trying to explain to Lu Chang.
Affection is a feeling, not necessarily tied to specific incidents. She could sense that subtle emotion in Song Qing Zhao’s gaze, demeanor, and tone. Sometimes she could even empathize, as if she had experienced similar feelings, the taste of loving someone.
Although both Song Qing Zhao and Lu Chang were aloof people, there were significant differences between them. Ming Shu could easily distinguish them. Song Qing Zhao’s aloofness stemmed more from his good family background and innate pride. He didn’t need to curry favor with others; just standing there would attract countless followers. He had an aristocratic air that made others feel ashamed of themselves. Therefore, Song Qing Zhao’s initiative, even just a smile or a gentle word, made Ming Shu aware. Combined with Aunt Xu’s words and her change in attitude, Ming Shu couldn’t pretend to be oblivious.
But describing these things in words would seem somewhat presumptuous.
“It’s a feeling,” Ming Shu felt like scratching her head in frustration – why had she asked Lu Chang to analyze this? She should have sought advice from her girlfriends.
Surprisingly, Lu Chang didn’t contradict her. He nodded: “Yes, I noticed it too.”
“Huh?” Ming Shu was shocked – she had only just noticed, how had he seen it?
The copper kettle started bubbling. Lu Chang got up to pour tea, saying while pouring: “There’s nothing strange about it.”
He knew too well how charming Ming Shu was.
He had accepted the fact of Song Qing Zhao’s affection for her earlier than she had.
It wasn’t strange that an excellent person would attract the love of another equally excellent person.
“Then what about you, do you like him?” Lu Chang didn’t want to ask how Ming Shu discovered Song Qing Zhao’s affection – he instinctively felt the answer wouldn’t make him happy.
Taking the tea from Lu Chang’s hand, Ming Shu said: “I don’t know.”
Since her brother wasn’t pressing for details, she felt relieved and answered honestly.
Lu Chang frowned – don’t know? What kind of answer was that? Neither accepting nor rejecting, but an ambiguous attitude.
Her answer was also an ending for him: if she liked him, it meant he had to let go; if she didn’t like him, he could temporarily feel relieved.
But she said she didn’t know.
“I don’t know.” Ming Shu dejectedly rested her head on the tall chair’s back. She shouldn’t be someone so indecisive – like is like, dislike is dislike, how could she be so confused now?
“Ever since meeting Song Qing Zhao, I keep having recurring dreams about the same person,” Ming Shu said, biting her lip.
Since she had already started, she might as well tell everything.
“What person?” Lu Chang asked.
Ming Shu recalled her dream – that man wore a green robe, elegant as a jade tree in the wind, his robe embroidered with several stalks of green bamboo, with an air of floating clouds and flying cranes. She instinctively felt he was an extremely handsome man, and in the dream, she desperately tried to see his face clearly, but in vain.
She had this dream several times in succession, each time making her heart race. She instinctively felt she must like this faceless, nameless man.
Thinking about it, her face grew warm.
But who was he?
After examining each person she knew one by one, she came to a bold conclusion: “I think I might have fallen for Song Qing Zhao.”
Lu Chang snapped out of his shock and firmly denied: “Impossible!”
“But I keep dreaming about him,” Ming Shu said, propping her chin with both hands, eyes full of romantic thoughts.
“The person in your dreams never showed his face, it can’t be him,” Lu Chang said. His emotions had become extremely complex, with shock, joy, and various unspeakable struggles – the person she dreamed of was him.
“But among the men around me who wear green robes with green bamboo and are as elegant as jade trees, only Song Qing Zhao fits,” Ming Shu said, eyes bright. “He’s good-looking, has a nice personality, and comes from a respectable family. If I were to marry him, I could accept that.”
Judging purely by conditions, Song Qing Zhao’s status as the dream lover of most young ladies in Bian Jing wasn’t just because of his looks.
The Duke’s family had an impeccable reputation – they only allowed concubines if the principal wife remained childless after thirty years, and there had never been cases of favoring concubines over wives. The old Duke and the heir had set examples by not taking concubines. With such family precepts, Song Qing Zhao surely wouldn’t be one to keep concubines, and although Madam Xu wasn’t easy to get along with, she wasn’t too bad after interacting with her. If marriage was inevitable, Song Qing Zhao was an excellent choice.
In this regard, Ming Shu wasn’t different from most young ladies in their prime waiting for marriage. She too had looked forward to a harmonious married life and her future husband. Compared to arranged marriages through parental orders and matchmakers, being able to choose a husband she liked was certainly best. She believed her mother and brother would give her the freedom to decide, so she didn’t act coy when discussing marriage with Lu Chang.
However, Lu Chang’s current thoughts were completely different from Ming Shu’s.
“Impossible.” He took a deep breath, his face slightly dark, firmly rejecting Ming Shu’s idea. “He’s not suitable for you.”
“How does Brother know he’s not suitable? Do you think we’re not well-matched with the Duke’s family?” Ming Shu felt Lu Chang’s rejection was too quick, thinking he shared others’ views. She asked and then answered herself, “What’s there to fear about mere status differences? If I like and approve of someone, whether their status is lower or higher than mine, it’s not a problem.”
Lu Chang closed his eyes briefly, remembering events before coming to the capital.
Class differences might constrain others, but not Ming Shu. When he was just a poor scholar, she never thought he wasn’t good enough for her. It was the same now – even though the Song family’s status was much higher, she still didn’t see it as a constraint.
All the common prejudices about marriage meant nothing in her eyes. She was like a spring rain, with the power to transform decay into magic.
Whether she was willing to spend her life with someone depended solely on whether she liked them or not.
Whether she had lost her memories or not, she had never changed. It was he… he who understood her too little, and constrained by worldly prejudices, foolishly and stubbornly pushed her away time and again.
“Brother, don’t you believe in me?” Ming Shu asked, seeing his silence.
She knew her words sounded a bit childish and presumptuous.
“No, I believe you,” Lu Chang opened his eyes, answering without hesitation.
“Then why do you still think he and I aren’t suitable?” Ming Shu asked him.
“That’s because I know…” Lu Chang stared at her, “You don’t like him.”
“If I don’t like him, why do I dream about him every day?” Ming Shu asked, puzzled – this was what confused her most. If she had fallen for Song Qing Zhao, she wouldn’t need to seek Lu Chang’s insight.
“He’s not the only one who wears green robes…” Lu Chang paused, gathering all his life’s courage, “I also wear green robes, embroidered with green bamboo…”
Before he could finish his sentence, he nearly got sprayed with tea from Ming Shu’s mouth.
“Brother! You’re my brother! Even if you don’t approve of Song Qing Zhao, you don’t need to sacrifice yourself like this. Why would I dream about you?” Ming Shu wiped her mouth, then shuddered, “Ugh, how disgusting.”
Even if Lu Chang dressed exactly like the man in her dreams, he couldn’t possibly appear on her list of potential suitors.
The porcelain cup in Lu Chang’s hand nearly shattered in his grip.
Though he knew the person she thought about, dreamed about was him, he could do nothing, say nothing…
He thought he had dug his own grave.
—
Regarding the “Song Qing Zhao” discussion, Ming Shu didn’t get a satisfactory answer from Lu Chang.
The troubles of love only bothered Ming Shu for one evening; when she woke up the next day, she had pushed it all to the back of her mind. She had many things to do, and what she couldn’t figure out, she had to set aside for now.
After all – she was still young.
She felt she was still young, no need to worry.
After breakfast, she hurriedly went out, heading to the Kaifeng Prefecture. The gold ingot from Wei Second Madam was still in her pocket. Although she couldn’t solve Liu’s worries, she could at least inquire about Wei Chao’s case to comfort Liu’s anxious heart.
With this thought, Ming Shu arrived at the Kaifeng Prefecture.
After the Song Ling Academy case, she became acquainted with several yamen runners, but unfortunately, Wei Xian’s case was entirely under Ying Xun’s charge, and others knew nothing of its progress.
“This murder case involves high-ranking court officials, so there’s pressure from above to solve it quickly. Seems like only two or three days are left. Brother Ying has been focused on the case these days, and today he seems to have gone to Jing Kang District to look for clues,” a yamen runner told Ming Shu.
Jing Kang District?
That was a busy alley in the city.
What clues could be found there?