When she awoke, the surroundings remained pitch black. Time seemed to stand still in the sealed dungeon, and Li Shuang felt disoriented, unable to distinguish between day and night. However, after a moment, she felt the slight weight on her lap, and looking down, she could determine the time.
It must be nighttime, as Jin’an had transformed into an adult man. Just like how she had seen him every night back in the Northern Frontier.
Without his black armor mask, his features appeared more refined. He was still in deep sleep – perhaps because he hadn’t properly rested these past days, once asleep, he found it difficult to wake.
Looking at his peaceful countenance, Li Shuang couldn’t help but recall those nights from several months ago. The mysterious man whose every appearance so easily stirred her emotions – anger, shyness, and that flutter in her heart…
As she reminisced, her hand gently touched his cheek, fingertips lightly tracing his brow ridge and nose bridge. His eye sockets were deeper than those of the Great Jin people, making him appear more like someone from the Western Rong, yet he possessed a refinement that Western Rong people lacked.
With unprecedented gentleness, she measured every inch of skin on his face. His eyelashes were long, though slight dark circles beneath his eyes testified to his recent torments. His cracked lips, with their white, peeling skin, scraped against her fingertips, causing an inexplicable itch in her heart. She wanted to smooth away these details that made him appear so haggard, and so her fingertips unconsciously wandered to his lips.
Unexpectedly, those lips in sleep suddenly parted slightly, and Li Shuang’s fingers inadvertently slipped between them.
He had caught them between his teeth…
The movement of his teeth and lips was gentle, carrying the warmth from within his body, warm enough to make one’s heart tremble.
Li Shuang instinctively tried to withdraw her hand, but the teeth holding her finger tightened just enough to stop her movement – not painful, but not light either.
He wouldn’t let her go.
Li Shuang looked down to find that Jin’an had opened his eyes at some point. He lay quietly on her lap, holding her finger between his teeth in this incredibly intimate way, gazing at her intently.
Their eyes met, and the dungeon air grew thick with unspoken tension as silence fell between them.
“Jin’an…” Li Shuang found her rationality again, clearing her throat softly as she looked away. “Let go.”
Jin’an’s teeth loosened slightly, freeing her finger. Just as Li Shuang let out a relieved breath, she heard him speak:
“Do you enjoy touching me?”
…How direct!
If Jin’an had been a child, Li Shuang wouldn’t have felt so awkward. Even knowing an adult’s consciousness resided within, his childlike appearance would have prevented such emotional complications. But now, with a grown man who matched her aesthetic preferences so well… lying in her lap, asking such a question at such proximity, Li Shuang felt her face growing warm.
She coughed again, but before she could answer, Jin’an continued: “I want to kiss you.”
“…” Li Shuang froze for a moment. “What?”
Jin’an obligingly repeated himself: “May I kiss you?”
Li Shuang was stunned. “You…”
“He says he wants to kiss you. The smoochy kind.” Wu Yin’s mischievous voice suddenly came from outside the dungeon. “I heard everything!”
After her embarrassment passed, Li Shuang grew angry from shame, gritting her teeth: “Why are you still here?”
Before Wu Yin could answer, Jin’an sat up from Li Shuang’s lap, his eyes flickering with killing intent: “I’ll kill him.”
Li Shuang quickly grabbed his hand, while from outside came the sound of Wu Yin setting something down: “Oh my, such ingratitude! I’ve been keeping watch all afternoon, just brought you both some food and now you want to kill me. How unreasonable!”
Li Shuang stood up as well, but having sat too long, her blood circulation was poor. The moment she rose, her legs were overwhelmed with pins and needles, as if being devoured by countless ants. She stumbled, and Jin’an quickly steadied her. The killing intent in his eyes instantly transformed into worry and… fear, like a child handling their most precious possession, afraid of dropping it, afraid of it melting away.
Li Shuang waved her hand reassuringly: “Just pins and needles, I’m fine.”
She let Jin’an support her to the door: “Let Jin’an out for tonight.”
This time it was Wu Yin outside who fell silent for a moment: “There’s still quite a mess out here, and this old medicine woman can’t run very fast anymore.”
Li Shuang understood Wu Yin’s concerns. She trusted Jin’an without question, simply believing in him. But others couldn’t: “Bring some handcuffs, chain us together. Would that work? He shouldn’t be a prisoner, shouldn’t be locked in here.”
Jin’an’s gaze shifted, looking down at the wounds on Li Shuang’s neck and her delicate wrists. Though others saw her as a female general capable of leading thousands of troops into battle, in Jin’an’s eyes, he only wanted to hide her behind him, keep her in the safest, most secluded place.
“I’m fine staying here,” Jin’an said. “You’re not a prisoner either, you shouldn’t be bound because of me.”
Li Shuang turned to look at him. In the silence, there came a “click” as the dungeon door opened outside.
Wu Yin stood there, his expression a mixture of helplessness and amusement as he watched them: “Alright, alright, you two are going to make me sick with sweetness. Come on, I’ll have someone arrange a room for you. When the Jade Silkworm Gu person is with their master, nothing should go wrong.”
He picked up the food from the ground: “Come out and eat.”
Up, Li Shuang held Jin’an’s hand. As they approached the dungeon entrance, where moonlight spilled across the ground, Jin’an, who hadn’t seen moonlight in so long, suddenly stopped.
Li Shuang’s hand slipped from his grasp, and she turned to look at him: “What’s wrong?”
Jin’an didn’t answer.
Li Shuang didn’t rush him, simply extending her hand quietly before him: “Don’t be afraid, come with me.”
Where Li Shuang stood, the cool moonlight spread thinly across the ground, making it seem as if she was glowing.
“I won’t hurt you,” he said, like a vow. “I won’t hurt anyone you don’t want me to hurt.”
“I know,” Li Shuang replied, gentle yet firm. “I believe in you.”
Jin’an placed his hand in her palm, both their hands burning hot like fire, warming each other, depending on each other.
“Li Shuang.” He called her name seriously for the first time. “You will be my only one for the rest of my life.”
Li Shuang opened her mouth, wanting to answer him, to give him some positive affirmation, feeling happy and moved to hear such words from him.
But at that moment, she heard the distant military horns from down the mountain, signaling the troops’ return to camp for rest. Li Shuang’s throat wound suddenly tore apart all the words in her chest.
She thought of the General’s Manor, of the Long Wind Camp in the frontier, of the emperor high above, and of the army she had bargained for with the latter half of her life.
She had saved him, but in her remaining years, she would not be his only one.