“Good girl, go rub his belly for him, otherwise he’ll feel terrible!”
The startled bird bell beneath the eaves had just rung when wind and rain arrived. A rapid clap of thunder struck the roof ridge, and one of the ridge beasts behind the Phoenix-Riding Immortal actually fell with the sound.
Liu Guan looked up in fright, discovering that what had fallen was a carved dragon.
This would mean someone’s life was at stake.
He didn’t dare tell the Emperor about this immediately. He quickly sent someone to the Ministry of Works and asked a young eunuch, “Has His Majesty awakened?”
The young eunuch shook his head anxiously. “No.”
As His Majesty aged, his afternoon naps grew longer. It wasn’t yet time for him to wake.
Liu Guan cursed silently at this ill omen—how did he end up encountering this? He paced back and forth under the corridor, finally sighing: “Forget it, I’ll wait until His Majesty wakes to tell him.”
But the Emperor was still in his dreams.
He frowned, hearing Duan Boyan’s continuous angry roar in his ear: “White bones exposed in the wilderness, not a cock’s crow for a thousand miles—this is something visible with open eyes, why does Your Majesty insist on closing both eyes!”
The Emperor turned over, sleeping restlessly. The voice in his ear continued unabated: “After embezzling the ghost salaries of a hundred thousand troops, you then embezzled the silver from horse sales at the Imperial Stud—one soldier, one horse, both soldiers and horses embezzled clean—what will you use in the end to protect the realm?”
The Emperor covered his ears irritably and guiltily. “Shut up!”
Liu Guan was stamping his feet when he heard these words. He quickly entered and knelt by the bed platform. “Your Majesty, you’re awake?”
The Emperor opened his eyes, but didn’t come to his senses for a long while. Then suddenly, looking at the bed canopy, he murmured: “I have a million mighty troops. Embezzling a mere hundred thousand in ghost salaries—what does that amount to?”
“Though I embezzled silver from the Imperial Stud, every tael of silver embezzled was used for the nation’s fundamental needs. What I used for myself was only an extremely small amount.”
He asked: “A’Ming’s defeat was because I misjudged people, which led to those fifty thousand troops being used to kill him. This point, I acknowledge. Duan Boyan lost his son, he’s angry, so I sent people to his residence for him to execute—having done this much, I’ve lived up to the four words ‘brotherhood.’ What more does he have to be dissatisfied with, that he keeps focusing on the remaining fifty thousand ghost salaries and constantly criticizing me—it’s merely fifty thousand! I am the Emperor! Why won’t they let it go?”
Upon hearing this, cold sweat instantly broke out on Liu Guan’s back, soaking through his clothes. Kneeling on the ground, he trembled and didn’t dare speak.
How did the conversation turn to this?
But thinking carefully, it actually made sense.
Others might not know about Ni Tao’s matter, but as the Emperor’s confidant eunuch, he knew.
It was Ni Tao who had concealed those fifty thousand troops for His Majesty.
He was the one who had found Ni Tao.
Liu Guan held his breath. “Your Majesty, did you have a nightmare?”
The Emperor sat up, his expression inscrutable. Liu Guan went to help him put on his socks. He thought of something, his expression growing even darker. “Liu Guan, tell me—what have I done to wrong Duan Boyan?”
Then he suddenly slapped the bed frame. “I rule diligently and love the people, never cruel—where is my sin?”
He simply didn’t understand. One after another calling him a sinner—if he were a sinner, then let Heaven strike him dead!
The thought had barely passed when he looked toward the window and frowned, asking Liu Guan, “Is it raining outside?”
Liu Guan helped him get up. “Yes… there was thunder just now too.”
The Emperor’s hand paused: “Hm?”
Liu Guan dropped to his knees with a thud. “Your Majesty, the dragon ridge beast has fallen.”
The Emperor: “What fell?”
Liu Guan prostrated himself. “The carved dragon behind the Crane-Riding Immortal—”
Before he could finish speaking, a pillow thrown by the Emperor struck his shoulder and neck.
Liu Guan didn’t dare make a sound, gritting his teeth as he continued putting shoes on the Emperor.
Just then the Minister of Works arrived, allowing him to withdraw.
A young eunuch felt sorry for him and sobbed: “Grandfather Liu, let this servant apply some medicine for you?”
Liu Guan shook his head and smiled. “No need.”
He stood in the courtyard looking at the roof ridge, at that empty space where a carved dragon should have stood. After looking for a long while, he suddenly raised his hand to touch his shoulder and neck, slowly murmuring: “Even this can fall down.”
…
Lan Shanjun and Yu Qingwu had just returned from the Eastern Palace.
Because they’d gotten caught in some rain while leaving the palace, their clothes were somewhat wet. Nanny Qian immediately had someone heat bath water.
Lan Shanjun felt it wasn’t necessary, but Nanny Qian said: “Don’t think that because the weather is hot, wet clothes drying on your body doesn’t matter—you’ll only know the mistake when you’re old!”
The two obediently went to bathe and washed their hair as well.
Yu Qingwu’s study had now become a place they frequented. So without eating, right after bathing, Lan Shanjun went to the study to discuss matters with him.
“A hundred thousand troops—even if fifty thousand were ghost soldiers, there were still fifty thousand.”
She said: “Shuzhou only had thirty thousand, right? Logically speaking, they shouldn’t have lost.”
Yu Qingwu sat across from her, separated by the desk. “Shuzhou’s terrain is treacherous. It had always been General Duan stationed there. For the Duke of Zhenguo to rashly go there, some difficulty adapting would be expected.”
He took out a gazette and circled a name on it. “Qi Huaijing—he was the one who led the rebellion back then. Wu Qingchuan once evaluated him as a rare genius. This person was born into a prestigious family but always preferred associating with bandits. Back then, using merely five thousand troops, he captured an entire city.”
Facing such a heaven-blessed genius, suffering defeat was understandable.
Lan Shanjun furrowed her brows in deep thought, then nodded. “This part, I won’t dwell on for now.”
She also took out a sheet of paper from the desk. “Let’s think about this: why did Wu Qingchuan want to tell you about this matter, or rather, why did he want to put the Ni family in prison?”
Ni Tao had been helping the Emperor for more than just a day—why would Wu Qingchuan move against him now?
By moving against Ni Tao, the Emperor would inevitably be alarmed.
Her brush slowly wrote down several names. “The Imperial Grand Heir, Prince Qi…”
“The late Crown Prince, Duan Boyan.”
She fell silent. “Will the Emperor remember the past because of Ni Tao?”
Remembering past events would make him think of past people.
She used her brush to cross out the names on the paper one by one. “The one he’d think of most should be the old monk, right? After all, these past years, he’s been constantly dwelling on it.”
Yu Qingwu was also somewhat confused.
He said: “Leading me to investigate Ni Tao’s falsified accounts? To reveal the truth of what happened back then?”
“If I knew but didn’t reveal it, he would come to mock me?”
Lan Shanjun pondered: “If not for my status, even if you went to ask the Imperial Grand Heir about the ghost salaries, he wouldn’t say anything.”
“Then you would have to investigate on your own—”
Her logic was clear as she connected those seemingly unrelated yet intricately intertwined matters, weaving a spider’s web, hoping to find traces from within.
But her eyes slowly became confused and vacant, as if she had fallen into a nightmare again.
This had become a habit.
She was accustomed to scrutinizing matters this way and still hadn’t changed.
Yu Qingwu admired her meticulous thinking but felt pained by her current expression.
He knew well that he couldn’t wake her at this moment.
She was in her dream, and he could only observe.
So he quieted down to grind ink for her, watching her intently.
Shanjun was truly formidable.
It wasn’t merely lover’s bias making her seem like Xi Shi—she truly was Xi Shi.
Her mind was the most formidable he had ever seen. She could always think of many possibilities the fastest.
He also understood what kind of hardships she had endured to achieve such results.
But hardships shouldn’t just pass by lightly. She ought to use this capability gained from hardship to do more things.
When Nanny Qian brought the meal, he quietly took it with light hands and feet, silently setting out the dishes. By the time Lan Shanjun came back to herself, the sky had already darkened.
Yu Qingwu had already lit the lamps.
She looked troubled for a moment, shaking her head. “Let’s eat first.”
Yu Qingwu: “Mm.”
The two didn’t have rules about not speaking during meals. Yu Qingwu served her some food with his chopsticks, then tentatively said: “Shanjun, didn’t you say that Miss Zhu manages waterworks, Miss Su practices medicine—but you don’t know what you can do?”
Lan Shanjun was startled, then nodded. “Yes.”
Yu Qingwu served her more food, leaning forward. “I think… your appearance just now was very much like a general.”
Lan Shanjun suddenly looked at him. “A general?”
Yu Qingwu smiled. “Yes, a general—you were taught by General Duan. Is there anything wrong with me saying you resemble a general?”
He said, “Look, commanding troops in battle, countless intertwining threads… with your abilities, you could untangle them too.”
Lan Shanjun wasn’t being self-deprecating or falsely modest. She laughed: “How could I possibly command troops in battle?”
Yu Qingwu chewed and swallowed a pea, as if casually saying slowly: “The fifty-seventh year of Yuanshao—seven years from now.”
“Even if these seven years are peaceful, who knows what will happen after seven years.”
They would both be dead.
“This dynasty is already rotten to its core. Perhaps Shuzhou, or somewhere else, will rise in rebellion, or perhaps foreign tribes will invade—”
He smiled. “Shanjun, didn’t you say we should walk the broad road? I was just thinking—your blade, used on the battlefield, that would be the broad road.”
Lan Shanjun’s mouth fell open upon hearing this. She was stunned for a long while without coming to her senses. Seeing this, Yu Qingwu felt emboldened by audacity and picked up her chopsticks resting on the table, used them to pick up a pea and feed it into her mouth.
Then, as if nothing had happened, he used the same chopsticks to pick up another pea for himself. “Shanjun, there are still seven years. In seven years’ time, if you study military strategy, even becoming a mess hall soldier would work.”
Lan Shanjun indeed fell into contemplation.
Yu Qingwu then continued using these chopsticks to eat and eat, eating until finally when Nanny Qian came, she scolded: “Good heavens! Even if my cooking is delicious, you can’t eat so much!”
What to do now that he’d eaten this much?
She grumbled as she went to brew digestive tea. Before leaving, she also told Lan Shanjun: “Good girl, go rub his belly for him, otherwise he’ll feel terrible!”

It is so baffling that this dogshit of an emperor lived to his seventies when he caused so many of his subjects’ deaths.