Outside the Mansion of the Duke of Hua

In the pouring rain, a disheveled youth sat in a corner against the wall, letting the merciless downpour wash over his frail body. His already pale complexion appeared even more ashen through the curtain of rain.

“Get up!” A handsome youth in white clothing landed gracefully not far from him, carefully holding an oil-paper umbrella to keep himself dry. Compared to his clean and pristine appearance, the other youth’s miserable and bedraggled state became even more apparent.

Mo Xiuyao gave a cold laugh and crouched down in front of Feng Zhiyao. “What’s this? Don’t want to live anymore?”

“Mind your own business!” Feng Zhiyao closed his eyes impatiently. His mood was extremely poor, and even though the person before him was his good friend, he didn’t want to deal with anyone. Mo Xiuyao sneered, “Since you’re already half-dead anyway, why not just die completely? Maybe Sister Hua would even shed a tear or two if she saw you in such a pitiful state.”

“Mo Xiuyao! Go to hell!” Feng Zhiyao roared, lunging at his friend who was crouching before him and mocking him. He desperately needed to vent his feelings, and if someone was asking to be beaten, why not oblige? In his anger, the dizzy youth forgot that this wasn’t someone he could hit so easily.

Sure enough, just as his body began to move, Mo Xiuyao, who had been crouching before him, had already stood up and retreated several steps. Feng Zhiyao’s attack met nothing but air. People in bad moods are always quick to anger, and while normally Feng Zhiyao would have stopped after missing once, this time he seemed determined to fight Mo Xiuyao. He stood up and threw a punch aimed at Mo Xiuyao’s face. Mo Xiuyao raised an eyebrow, dodged, and Feng Zhiyao lunged again. The two began trading blows in the rain. The difference was stark: Feng Zhiyao was not only soaking wet but covered in mud as if he had been rolling in a quagmire. Meanwhile, Mo Xiuyao’s white clothes floated elegantly, one hand still holding his umbrella, and even in the wind and rain, not a single drop seemed to touch him. It looked less like a fight and more like a casual stroll in the spring rain.

When Feng Zhiyao finally ran out of strength, Mo Xiuyao smiled and kicked him several zhangs away. Looking at Feng Zhiyao lying in the muddy water, too tired to even get up, he said, “This young master is heading to the southern border tomorrow. Want to come along? If you want to live, get up and come with me. If you want to die, keep lying there.” Without waiting to see if Feng Zhiyao would get up, he turned and left.

In the muddy water, Feng Zhiyao lay there, letting the rain beat against his pale, handsome face. After a long while, he slowly got up. He looked back one last time at the still-lit windows of the Hua mansion in the night, then turned and headed in the direction Mo Xiuyao had gone.

Seventeen years later

In a small estate outside Licheng, Hua Yunxi sat alone by the window, gazing absent-mindedly at the autumn chrysanthemums in the courtyard. Though she was now in her thirties, time had left few marks on her beautiful features. Instead, the dignity of her noble family background and her former position as the mother of a nation had given her an even more distinguished air than ordinary women.

“Mother!”

Mo Wuyou pushed open the door and entered with a smile. Hua Yunxi quickly stood up and went to take her daughter’s hand, saying softly, “Why did you come out of the city? You should be resting properly in your condition.” Mo Wuyou nestled against her mother coquettishly and said, “Since I’m with child and Mother still won’t stay in the city to take care of her daughter, I had no choice but to come out here.”

“You’re being silly,” Hua Yunxi said helplessly, tapping her daughter’s forehead with a smile. “Your mother-in-law is taking excellent care of you, what would you need me for? You’re such a sensible child, and having Lady Xu as your mother-in-law is truly fortunate. Why are you talking such nonsense?”

Mo Wuyou stuck out her tongue. Of course, she had no complaints about her mother-in-law; she just wanted to spend time with her mother. Looking at her mother, Mo Wuyou’s eyes twinkled as she said, “Oh right, Mother, I just saw Uncle Feng San outside. Why isn’t he coming in?”

Hearing this, Hua Yunxi hesitated before saying, “He has no particular business here. He’ll leave soon enough.”

Mo Wuyou smiled skeptically. She had observed Feng Zhiyao’s every move over the years. As a daughter, if she said she truly wanted her mother to find a stepfather, that would be a lie. But Mo Wuyou also understood her mother’s hardships and grievances over the years, as well as Feng Zhiyao’s devoted heart. If it hadn’t been for Feng Zhiyao’s determination to rescue her mother from the palace back then, her mother probably wouldn’t even be alive today.

Feng Zhiyao was well past thirty now, yet he persisted in defying Feng Zhihuai’s wishes by refusing to marry. He cared for her mother with the utmost attention and was somewhat ungrateful, even Xu Qingbai wasn’t so meticulous with her. Mother was only in her thirties, with much of life still ahead. If possible, Mo Wuyou naturally hoped her mother could live the rest of her life happily.

“Mother, why not let Uncle Feng San come in and talk things through properly? From the look of him, I don’t think he’ll leave easily,” Mo Wuyou gently advised.

Hua Yunxi sighed bitterly. How could she not understand Feng Zhiyao’s feelings after all these years? But understanding was one thing, reality another. He was one of the most trusted advisors of the Prince of Ding, holding a high position and authority with a brilliant future ahead. She was the widow of the previous dynasty’s emperor, and even though she had changed her name, how could she truly deceive the world? If they were to be together, it would ruin not only Feng Zhiyao’s reputation but also Mo Wuyou’s, the Xu family’s, and even the Prince of Ding’s reputation.

Mo Wuyou could see her mother’s concerns but didn’t know how to persuade her. The Prince and Princess of Ding wouldn’t mind these things, nor would the Xu family, but no matter how she tried to convince her, her mother couldn’t let go of her worries.

“Since Mother doesn’t want to see Uncle Feng San, I’ll go send him away.”

Hua Yunxi remained silent, and Mo Wuyou shook her head regretfully as she turned to leave.

“Uncle Feng San.” Outside the door, a handsome man in crimson robes was pacing anxiously in the courtyard. Hearing Mo Wuyou’s voice, he turned around hopefully, but his eyes dimmed when he didn’t see the person he wanted to see.

“She still won’t see me?” Feng Zhiyao asked quietly. Though he was past thirty, the Third Young Master Feng in his crimson robes remained strikingly handsome. The tempering of countless battles had even added a sharp edge and steadiness to his bearing. The current Feng Third Young Master was certainly no longer the good-for-nothing young master of Chang’an from years ago. Yet despite his achievements and fame, he still couldn’t obtain what he wanted most. Since Mo Wuyou’s marriage, Hua Yunxi had moved out of Licheng to live in a villa at the foot of the mountain, not far from Lishan Academy. Since then, she had become almost like a recluse, rarely leaving home, and recently she had even refused to see him entirely.

Mo Wuyou shook her head apologetically, looking at Feng Zhiyao with sympathy. She knew her mother’s personality well – once she had made up her mind about something, it was very difficult to change it.

Feng Zhiyao’s smile turned bitter. Seeing his dimmed expression, Mo Wuyou couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. “Um, Uncle Feng, perhaps you should go back for now. Maybe in a few days when Mother’s mood improves…”

Feng Zhiyao shook his head and said, “Never mind. Please help me give something to your mother.” Mo Wuyou nodded, and Feng Zhiyao took out a light purple night pearl the size of a walnut from his robes and placed it in her hand. Mo Wuyou frowned at the object, feeling an odd sense of familiarity. Soon, she remembered that her mother indeed had a similar night pearl. However, her mother’s was strung on a light red cord, while this one had a dark blue cord. When she was young, she had asked her mother for it, but her mother, who usually indulged her every wish, had refused.

“Don’t worry, Uncle Feng, I’ll make sure to give it to her,” Mo Wuyou promised.

Feng Zhiyao forced a bitter smile and said, “Thank you. Farewell.”

Watching Feng Zhiyao’s desolate figure disappear, Mo Wuyou sighed deeply.

“Rejected again, huh?” A youth in black clothes landed lightly on the wall, smiling and resting his chin in his hand as he watched Feng Zhiyao leave. “Better to destroy ten temples than ruin one marriage, they say. Who would have thought that this young master would have to play matchmaker again? I wonder how Feng San will repay me. He’ll surely be moved to tears of gratitude and swear to go through fire and water for me, right?”

“He’ll try his best not to kill you,” said another youth, a year or two younger, expressionlessly from atop the wall.

“Brother Zhirui, there should be limits to such ingratitude, shouldn’t there? How unfortunate for this young master to have such a bridge-burning cousin?” the young Master Mo lamented plaintively.

Xu Zhirui’s mouth twitched, and he asked darkly, “Why would I need to cross any bridges?! Remember, cousin!” Did Mo Xiaobao think everyone in the world had the same problematic mind as his – digging holes for people to fall into, then pulling them out and expecting gratitude?

Mo Xiaobao guiltily rubbed his nose and sighed, “Never mind, for Feng San’s future, I’ll risk it!”

“Aunt Hua! Aunt Hua!” Inside the room, Hua Yunxi was lost in thought while holding the night pearl Mo Wuyou had given her when Mo Xiaobao’s urgent voice came from outside. Without waiting for Hua Yunxi’s response, he burst in, “Aunt Hua, have you seen Feng San?”

Hua Yunxi was startled and looked at Mo Wuyou, saying, “He… just left. What’s wrong?”

“Left?!” Mo Xiaobao cried out in horror, “How could he leave? Where… where did he go?”

“What happened?” Hua Yunxi’s heart tightened as she hurriedly asked.

Mo Xiaobao’s face turned grave, “This is terrible. He must have lost all hope and gone off somewhere to waste away. Quick! We must hurry and send people to find him. Master Shen said his illness can’t wait.”

“Illness? What illness?” Hua Yunxi’s face turned pale as she grabbed Mo Xiaobao anxiously. Standing behind her, Mo Wuyou frowned in confusion. She had just seen Feng Zhiyao, and though he seemed unhappy, he didn’t appear ill at all.

Mo Xiaobao shook his head helplessly and said, “Master Shen didn’t say… only that he might not live past three months. Feng San just told my father he wanted to leave for a while, then ran off. Father and Mother are sending people everywhere to look for him, and they asked me to check if he came here.”

Hua Yunxi swayed, almost collapsing. Mo Wuyou quickly supported her and was about to speak when she caught Mo Xiaobao’s meaningful glance. After hesitating, Hua Yunxi asked, “Wuyou… did he say anything else before he left?”

Mo Wuyou didn’t want to deceive her mother but also didn’t want to ruin Mo Xiaobao’s plan, so she could only say, “No… Uncle Feng San only asked me to give Mother the item.”

Hua Yunxi tremblingly took out another pearl. Two almost identical purple night pearls lay quietly in her hand, emitting a soft, gorgeous light. The silk cords were equally aged, with identical true lover’s knots – only the colors differed, one light red and one dark blue, clearly a matching pair. Hua Yunxi suddenly remembered that rainy night many years ago, the youth’s stubborn yet dim eyes and pale countenance.

Seeing Hua Yunxi’s dazed look, Mo Xiaobao’s eyes flickered, and he said with a hint of tears in his voice, “Feng San told Father he wanted to do what he desired most. Aunt Hua, do you know what Feng San wants most? Do you know where he might go?”

She knew, but she had driven him away!

“He… he… I’m going to find him!” With that, Hua Yunxi turned and rushed out.

In the room behind her, Mo Xiaobao lowered his hands from his face, his handsome features clean and full of smiles, without a trace of tears. Mo Wuyou frowned, staring at Mo Xiaobao, and asked, “What are you up to now?”

Mo Xiaobao smiled innocently, “Doesn’t Sister Wuyou think they’re wasting everyone’s time and energy by dragging this out?”

What does that have to do with you? Mo Wuyou thought silently.

Mo Xiaobao sighed helplessly, gazing at the bright yet melancholic sky outside. Last time he had played a small trick on Feng San, causing him to work poorly and become listless. His unscrupulous father believed it was all his fault, so he ordered him to immediately resolve all of Feng San’s problems. Heaven knows, that even without his mischief, Feng San couldn’t have won over Aunt Hua anyway!

“Will this work?” Mo Wuyou asked doubtfully.

“If Feng San can’t take advantage of this situation, then he might as well die,” Mo Xiaobao said expressionlessly. Forcing others to take responsibility for mistakes that weren’t their own – how unreasonable!

At a cliff outside Licheng, Hua Yunxi had asked directions from local villagers along the way. As soon as she reached the cliff, she saw Feng Zhiyao standing at the edge with his back to her, looking as if a single gust of wind could blow him off.

“Zhiyao, what are you doing?” After her journey, Hua Yunxi was slightly out of breath. But seeing the crimson figure at the cliff’s edge, her heart leaped into her throat, and she hardly dared to breathe.

Feng Zhiyao turned around, looking at her calmly, and said, “Sister Hua, why did you come?”

Hua Yunxi said gently, “What are you doing here? Whatever it is, come over here and we can talk about it slowly, alright?” Feng Zhiyao smiled bitterly and said, “There’s nothing left to say. I was foolish before, troubling Sister Hua. In the future… it won’t happen again.”

Seeing his seemingly withered expression, Hua Yunxi felt as if her heart was being squeezed painfully, “Zhiyao, whatever the problem is… we can figure it out slowly, everything will get better. Please come over here first, alright? You standing there frightens me.”

Feng Zhiyao shook his head, smiling faintly, “This place is fine. Sister Hua, you should go back. Zhiyao will never trouble you again.” With that, he turned around, his body leaning slightly forward.

“Zhiyao?!” Hua Yunxi couldn’t help crying out, wanting to rush forward and grab him. But she stood too far from Feng Zhiyao – if he truly wanted to die, she wouldn’t be able to catch him in time. Moreover, with her build and strength, she absolutely couldn’t hold him back. An unprecedented fear spread throughout her entire being, “Zhiyao, didn’t you say you would take care of me? Are you going back on your word?”

Feng Zhiyao paused, then slowly shook his head, “I… won’t be able to take care of Sister Hua for much longer.”

“It doesn’t matter, however long we have is fine. Besides… who knows what the future holds?” Hua Yunxi said nervously.

Feng Zhiyao turned back to look at her and asked, “Sister Hua, are you pitying me again? Just like when we were young…”

Hua Yunxi shook her head, “No… Zhiyao, I’m sorry, I was wrong before. I was too concerned about what others would think. I know… I know your feelings for me are genuine.”

“Then… what about your feelings for me?” Feng Zhiyao asked hopefully.

Hua Yunxi hesitated for a moment, then gripped the two pearls in her hand and said firmly, “I can’t guarantee that I have… those feelings right now, but I want to try. Zhiyao, are you willing to try with me?”

“Even if I only have three months?”

Hua Yunxi nodded solemnly.

After a long while, Feng Zhiyao finally slowly moved away from the cliff, walking toward Hua Yunxi. Her heart, which had been in her throat, finally began to settle, and her legs gave way beneath her. She had never been physically strong and had made it this far purely on determination. Now that she saw Feng Zhiyao was safe, she finally relaxed and could no longer support herself.

Feng Zhiyao moved in a flash to her side, catching her falling form. “Sister Hua… no, Yunxi, do you truly want to marry me?” Hua Yunxi was startled, and looking at Feng Zhiyao’s hopeful and joyful gaze, she could no longer bring herself to refuse. Finally, she gave a slight nod.

“Really?! That’s wonderful… Yunxi, I’m so happy…” Feng Zhiyao held her tightly, unable to contain his laughter.

Mo Xiaobao and Xu Zhirui, who had followed Hua Yunxi, lounged lazily against a large tree at the foot of the mountain. Mo Xiaobao’s handsome features twisted grotesquely, “Isn’t Feng Zhiyao celebrating too early?”

Xu Zhirui gave him a lazy glance, “His wish has been granted, shouldn’t he be happy? Are you jealous?”

“Shouldn’t he first consider what to do when he doesn’t die after three months?” Mo Xiaobao gritted his teeth. This was his idea, his plan! Where was the gratitude, the eternal thankfulness? The pledges of undying loyalty?

“…”

On the cliff, Third Young Master Feng, holding his beloved, had no mind to consider what would happen after three months. He only knew that after so many years, he had finally caught hold of the beautiful figure he had been infatuated with, yearned for, yet could never obtain. That void in his heart that had existed since he first saw her suddenly felt… full, warm, and content.

Hua Yunxi leaned weakly in Feng Zhiyao’s embrace, no longer willing to struggle. In this world, no man’s feelings for her were more genuine than Feng Zhiyao’s, and no man had ever made her feel such heart-wrenching pain as he did.

This was enough.

My lord, you know I have a husband,

Yet you gift me these twin bright pearls.

I feel your endless devotion,

As I tie them to my crimson dress.

My home rises high with connected gardens,

My husband stands guard in the palace bright.

I know your heart is as true as the sun and moon,

I’ve sworn to my husband till death do us part.

I return your bright pearls with falling tears,

Regretting we didn’t meet before I wed.