In the end, Cen Jin spared this tender, pure sapling. First because of environmental limitations, and second because she wasn’t completely ready yet.

After chatting intermittently in the car, Cen Jin let Li Wu return to his dorm before driving away.

A few days later, while organizing briefs at her computer, Cen Jin received a link from an old classmate asking: “Is this you?”

Cen Jin’s brows furrowed slightly as she clicked to look.

It was a post on F University’s BBS Sunshine forum. Cen Jin logged in with her old account and found photos of herself from the Halloween party. The eye-catching title read: “Sharing our Physics Department’s campus idol’s girlfriend – she’s amazing.”

Below were discussions about her:

— Must be noona romance? The woman looks like she really knows how to have fun.

— Beautiful smile, great figure too.

— Physics majors get this lucky? Is it too late for me to transfer?

— You’d need the campus idol’s looks first.

After a few comments, the topic derailed, focusing on her young boyfriend.

— I’ve seen your department’s idol in the cafeteria before, he’s truly handsome, tall and good-looking.

— Why haven’t I run into him in the cafeteria???

— Above poster, he jogs at the south field every morning, around 6:30, you can usually catch him unless it’s raining.

— Why are you still looking when he’s taken? Think he’ll be yours just by looking? He clearly prefers older sisters.

— Beauty belongs to everyone, what’s wrong with looking?

— Li Wu? He’s an incredible genius, got into Professor Zhang’s lab as a freshman, won tens of thousands in scholarships last year, gets any academic award he wants, super impressive.

— He used to always be with that other genius from his dorm, you know? I even secretly shipped them. Then suddenly he has a girlfriend, speechless.

…

Cen Jin smiled faintly as she finished reading, then closed the webpage and replied to her classmate: “Yes, that’s me.”

Her classmate, who stayed at the university to teach, teased: “Didn’t expect you’d left the jianghu but your legend lives on. How did you meet?”

Cen Jin pondered for a moment: “Just a coincidence.”

…

That night, after finishing her daily video call with Li Wu, Cen Jin was so tired her eyelids were fighting each other. She fell into bed and immediately dozed off.

Perhaps influenced by that post from earlier, she had an unpleasant dream.

In the dream, she found herself back at that familiar Japanese restaurant near her old company, the time, scene, and decorations exactly the same. Suspicious, she climbed the stairs to the second floor step by step.

Just as she reached the second floor, she saw a man and woman sitting across from each other at the same booth.

But it wasn’t Wu Fu and Bian Xinran.

Facing her direction was Wan Chun, her face memorably pretty.

Across from her was a young man in a white shirt, broad shoulders tapering to a narrow waist, thick black hair.

A chill crept up Cen Jin’s spine inch by inch – this back view wasn’t unfamiliar to her.

Wan Chun seemed to sense her presence, her bright eyes suddenly glancing over, then curving into a provocative smile of certainty.

The young man, perhaps noticing Wan Chun staring in one direction, also turned around.

The moment she saw his face, Cen Jin felt like she’d fallen into an ice cellar and jolted awake.

Her heart pounding uncontrollably, face pale as paper, she frantically grabbed her phone and called Li Wu, not caring what time it was–

Li Wu was awakened by the violent vibration beside his pillow.

Squinting at the name on the screen, his eyes immediately widened as he sat up straight to answer, but before he could ask anything, the other end launched into a tirade:

“Li Wu, are you even human? I really misjudged you! I’m so angry! I never want to talk to you again!”

Li Wu was completely bewildered: “?”

With his roommates’ breathing thunderous, he could only speak softly: “What’s wrong?”

The outburst seemed to finally stabilize the woman’s emotions, her tone becoming much calmer: “What have you been doing behind my back?”

Li Wu was confused: “What did I do?”

She insisted: “I saw it in my dream.”

Li Wu let out a couple of soft chuckles, then quickly covered his mouth to avoid disturbing others: “What… how can you be this cute?”

Cen Jin said coldly: “Goodbye, I’m going back to sleep.”

Li Wu looked around and lowered his voice to tease her: “Can you have some good dreams for the rest of the night?”

Cen Jin snorted lightly and hung up.

―

The next day, Cen Jin felt that her behavior last night was like someone with the mental age of less than ten. Even when Li Wu specially messaged to check if she’d slept well afterward, she was too embarrassed to bring it up again.

Around noon, she suddenly received a call from the source of her nightmare, saying he’d come to see her.

Cen Jin paused, glancing at her surrounding colleagues before walking to a less crowded spot by the floor-to-ceiling windows, asking quietly: “Really?”

“Mm.” His nasal tone was clear and strong.

Cen Jin grew agitated: “Why did you come? Don’t you have class?”

“I came after class. Can’t I see you? I’m not downstairs at your company.”

“Then where are you?”

The young man said: “Come down first.”

Cen Jin had no choice with him. She smoothed her hair, pocketed her phone, and went downstairs.

Thankfully, everyone had gone out in groups for lunch, allowing her to sneak away to meet this young lover who always caught her off guard.

This time Li Wu was more sensible, not bold enough to stand by the central fountain, but across the street instead.

In the melting sunlight, the young man wore a white sweater, looking like a male lead who’d stepped out of a Korean drama.

Cen Jin looked left and right, confirming no familiar company faces within a hundred meters, before crossing through the crowd.

She stopped a distance from him, instinctively crossing her arms: “What did you want to see me about?”

The young man’s smile faded at her somewhat guarded response. He stepped closer: “What did you dream about last night? Tell me clearly.”

Cen Jin narrowed her eyes: “I’ll tell you later.”

Li Wu looked at her, his gaze sharp: “You always brush me off like this.”

Cen Jin was puzzled: “How am I brushing you off? I ran out to see you before even having lunch.”

Li Wu tried to take her hand: “Then come have lunch with me now.”

Cen Jin avoided it, maintaining a proper distance: “No, I need to go back up, I have work to do.”

“You’re afraid of running into your colleagues, right?” Li Wu hit the nail on the head.

Cen Jin took a deep breath: “I told you I have work.”

Li Wu stared at her directly: “Go back to work, I’ll buy food and bring it up to you.”

Anger surged as Cen Jin questioned: “Did you come find me just to act neurotic? Can you stop being childish here?”

Li Wu was extremely hurt and indignant, pointing at the sidewalk: “Today I didn’t even dare go to the other side, afraid you’d tell me to leave as soon as you saw me like last time, or just turn and run.”

His jaw tightened for a second: “I just couldn’t stop worrying after your phone call last night, wanted to see in person if you were okay.”

Cen Jin’s face was like frost: “You’ve seen me, I’m fine, can you go back to school now?”

Li Wu felt something stuck in his throat, his brows gathering wounded emotions.

His eyes were still and black as he gazed at the woman for a moment, then glanced at the bustling traffic beside them, finally looking straight at her to utter one word:

“Fine.”

He turned and left immediately.

Cen Jin’s nearly snapped nerves finally relaxed, though the aftershock remained, trembling with an intensity that almost brought tears. She stared at Li Wu’s desolate retreating figure for a while, then lowered her crossed arms and turned back toward the company.

―

Perhaps she was no longer a romantic person.

This thought stuck in Cen Jin’s mind all afternoon, becoming increasingly clear. Yes, the girlish bacteria in her system were almost depleted. Her previous marriage and the experiences of age had given her many preventive shots, causing rationality to rapidly develop into an essential antibody in her thinking over the past few years.

At least on workdays, she preferred order, stability, and everything under control.

Yet that child still charged recklessly at her impregnable fortress.

One would have been fine – she could put up a no-entry sign.

But he dared come a second time, so she couldn’t blame her for deploying troops, surrounding the city walls, and taking a harder stance.

Cen Jin didn’t want to coddle him about this anymore. It was a waste of energy.

If she had to care for his emotions, who would care for hers?

The more Cen Jin thought about it, the angrier she became. By the end of work, her expression was so dark that Lu Qiqi, who wanted to invite her for late-night food, kept her distance.

Cen Jin drove home, but unexpectedly found Li Wu there, sitting on the sofa with his laptop.

Seeing her enter, the young man glanced up from behind the screen, their eyes meeting briefly.

He couldn’t have skipped afternoon classes, could he?

Cen Jin instinctively worried like a mother, but in the end, said nothing, turning to go to the bedroom to remove her makeup and change clothes.

When she came out again, the young man was waiting in the hallway entrance, tall and thin, his presence overwhelming.

Cen Jin prepared to ignore him and pass by, but this human wall reached out to stop her.

Cen Jin looked up, glancing at him emotionlessly.

Li Wu looked back, showing a hint of willingness to negotiate: “Can we resolve this issue?”

“What issue?” Cen Jin asked flatly.

Li Wu pressed his lips together: “I just want to know why you don’t want others to know about our relationship.”

Here we go again. Cen Jin was utterly exhausted. She tilted her head: “Is it that important? There’s no need to announce such things to the world, and I don’t want to become others’ entertainment.”

Li Wu retorted: “So am I just your entertainment?”

Cen Jin shot back: “When have I ever treated you as entertainment?”

“Haven’t you? Don’t you just treat me like a pet?” Li Wu showed some dejection: “Maybe not even a pet – at least you’d let others see a pet.”

Disbelief made Cen Jin’s eyes brighten: “What are you obsessing over?”

Li Wu let out a self-mocking laugh: “You think I’m obsessing? I’ve never hidden our relationship from anyone around me. But you? Am I something shameful? Do you treat me as your proper boyfriend?”

Cen Jin burned with anger: “Because our social situations are different – what do you understand!”

“Isn’t it just that you care what others think of you?”

Cen Jin replied without thinking: “Yes, exactly, I do care.”

Li Wu’s eyes grew red and wet: “In the end, I’m just entertainment. You pitied me and played with me, then pushed me away when you got tired. None of my emotions or thoughts matter to you at all. Have you ever cared about my feelings?”

“I don’t care about your feelings? Last week I worked desperately to arrange a time just to attend your party,” Cen Jin laughed incredulously: “I must have nothing better to do.”

Taking her kindness for granted – Cen Jin’s whole body went cold as she walked past him toward the living room.

Li Wu followed close behind, his tone intense as he pleaded: “Since we started dating, I tell you I like you every day. Have you said you like me even once? No matter how many times I ask about your work, you won’t tell me a word. You even hid going to your ex-husband’s wedding from me. Am I not worthy of knowing, or what? Besides more intimate contact, how are we different from last year? You can naturally enter my social circle, but won’t let me take half a step into yours – not even a tiny bit. Don’t you think that’s unfair to me?”

Cen Jin stopped, her shoulders rigid for several seconds before she turned back decisively, glaring at him: “Fine, then I’ll withdraw. Fair enough?”

Like a thunderbolt, Li Wu also stopped: “What do you mean?”

Cen Jin curved her lips coldly: “Exactly what you think I mean. I suggest you go find Wan Chun – your social situations are very pure and very compatible. Or any girl at your university. They’d all be more fair, more happy than being with me.”

The woman looked heartless and certain as if she’d made her decision at this moment.

As if stabbed in the heart, Li Wu felt like dying from pain, panicking completely, his eyes red: “No one but you can make me happy.”

“Is this what happiness looks like?” Cen Jin was filled with a sense of helpless frustration, babbling words she couldn’t believe herself: “How do you know you won’t be? You’ve never tried. Why does it have to be me? Why must you like me? Haven’t you realized? We might not be suitable at all – this time was just an experiment.”

“I could never like anyone else,” Li Wu stared unblinkingly: “I only love you.”

Cen Jin couldn’t stand his eyes the most, always so wet with deep emotion, burning her heart with pain. She was a sinner.

She looked away: “Stop looking at me.”

“So young,” her tone grew faint, slightly disdainful: “What do you know about love?”

“Why won’t you let me look at you?” Li Wu stepped forward, grabbing her wrist.

Cen Jin struggled twice but couldn’t break free. Her eyes still focused vaguely elsewhere: “Because I don’t want to look at you.”

“Why?”

Cen Jin pressed her lips tightly shut, not answering.

“I don’t understand. Cen Jin, I understand better than you,” Li Wu’s chest heaved as he grew aggressive: “I dare to say I like you – do you dare to say you don’t like me?”

As if struck in a wound, Cen Jin’s arm jerked away forcefully, finally breaking free: “Why wouldn’t I dare say it?”

“Then say it!” his voice suddenly rose.

Cen Jin trembled at being shouted at, looking straight back at him, forcing her tone to be calm: “I don’t like you.”

The light in Li Wu’s eyes wavered violently: “I don’t believe you.”

Cen Jin’s chest ached: “How many times do I need to say it before you’ll believe it?”

Li Wu’s Adam’s apple rolled forcefully as if holding back: “You don’t want me anymore?”

“You never belonged to anyone.”

“I belong to you.” He was so certain.

“Stop blackmailing me, okay?” Cen Jin was a near breakdown, knowing nothing but harsh words: “I’m already exhausted from work, I just want to rest now. I’m begging you, please leave me alone, okay?”

The young man was like an airless prison. She walked in the opposite direction, desperately seeking an emotional outlet, a place to put her feelings.

“Sister.” He suddenly called her this way, his voice low and hoarse.

Cen Jin’s pupils dilated as she unconsciously stopped.

The next moment, a warm, helpless body crashed into her, embracing her.

“I’m begging you too,” Li Wu’s nose and lips brushed behind her ear, his burning breath seeming to drill directly into her brain: “Don’t push me away, don’t say you don’t like me, don’t tell me to find someone else. I won’t argue with you anymore, won’t force you to do anything…”

Cen Jin’s lips trembled, her ear burning. There was his breath, and what seemed like his tears, hot enough to melt her.

Her vision blurring, Cen Jin slowly raised her hand to find Li Wu’s arm wrapped around her front, touching his fingers, wanting to pull them away.

Li Wu wouldn’t let go, instead intertwining their fingers, unyielding yet extremely gentle.

Cen Jin’s heart surged as she unconsciously gripped one of his fingers.

The person behind her trembled, as if encouraged, and began kissing her neck. He buried himself there, sucking and licking, densely, like a desperately thirsty young beast.

His breathing was so heavy, his kisses growing stronger, and when he reached her earlobe, he bit down hard as if punishing her.

Cen Jin moaned in pain, her body completely softening. She instinctively rose on her toes, lifting her neck to meet and receive him.

She reached back to touch his face, randomly caressing his strong jaw, damp hair roots, and burning ears as if venting.

Clothes rustling, he held her tighter, almost lifting her feet off the ground, as if trying to embed her into his body, never to separate.

Harsh breathing and soft moans intertwined hotly.

Cen Jin’s chest heaved rapidly; Li Wu’s breathing was chaotic as he pressed hard against her.

He was hard and burning, like a gun pressed against her back, ready for mutual destruction.

“Li Wu…” When she felt his palm on her lower abdomen, Cen Jin’s voice grew sticky: “Don’t…”

Her face flushed, her toes curling, her throat full of broken pleas.

His fingers were recklessly exploring, invading, awakening her dormant shell.

Cen Jin resignedly turned back to him, kissing and biting him fiercely.

They couldn’t bear to part, like two dying vines. Any shell was superfluous – torn open, stripped bare, pressed together nakedly, entangled to death, only then could they completely draw from each other, finding life force again.

…

The room was as hot as a rainforest as they collided against the hallway wall, growing wild, gradually extending to the bedroom…

The environment was dim, the bed soft.

As she guided the young man deeper, spring tide spread beneath her pubic bone, as a long-frozen rose finally thawing, splitting open, blooming, diffusing wet fragrance.

Cen Jin slowly closed her eyes in fulfillment and sin.

A tear slid down her temple into her hair.

A pure soul cannot be defiled – she absolved herself and begged heaven’s forgiveness, even if it meant going to hell, being crushed to dust.

She lightly stroked his concentrated brows and eyes, softly calling his name: “Li Wu.”

“Mm.” The young man’s face was backlit, enduring to the utmost. His eyes were like whirlpools, deeply drawing her in, just as she tightly drew him in.

Their eyes met – possession was also surrendered.

Cen Jin instinctively moved her hips, wanting to completely devour him, finally being honest with her heart: “I lied. I like you, I like you very much.”

Her movement and confession came unexpectedly – Li Wu lost control for a moment, his face burning red.

Cen Jin felt it and laughed, holding his adorable face in both hands, confirming again: “Mm, I like you.”