After staring at each other for a while.

Xu You quietly asked Xie Ci what he was looking at. She tilted her head slightly upward, the line from her chin to her neck soft and slender.

He just looked at her like this, his eyes flickering. Yet it was exactly like withered wood meeting spring—sweet spring water surging forth from parched earth.

“…Can I hug you?”

After speaking, Xie Ci turned his head away and coughed unnaturally.

His voice was so low it was almost as if he hadn’t said anything at all.

Not knowing whether she had heard or not, Xu You neither agreed nor refused.

He endured for two or three seconds, but ultimately couldn’t hold back. Without waiting for Xu You’s agreement, Xie Ci walked forward two steps and directly extended both arms to pull her into his embrace.

She didn’t resist, so he held her tighter and tighter, his body tense, as if afraid Xu You would run away, looking like he wished he could embed her into his body.

Xu You stood frozen in place, her chin bumping against his shoulder, not knowing how to react.

This was a deserted corner, with tall scattered trees providing cover nearby. The wind blew past, stirring up the rustling sound of leaves.

The two were pressed close together. Xie Ci’s school uniform must have just been washed. It carried the clean fragrance of soap pods, faint yet pleasant.

Blinking, Xu You came back to her senses and calmly lowered her eyelashes. Her hands, naturally hanging at her sides, hesitantly lifted, then lowered. Finally, she slowly hugged Xie Ci back, tentatively patting his back.

“Are you alright?”

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

“Xie Ci?”

“…Don’t call me.”

There was actually a hint of grievance in his voice, hoarse: “I want to hold you a little longer.”

Xu You: …..

Xie Ci hadn’t hugged her in a long time. However long they had been cold toward each other, that’s how long it had been since he had truly felt the sensation of holding her tightly in his arms like this. He lowered his eyes, secretly looking at the top of Xu You’s head, yet afraid of being discovered. Though his heart was clearly so happy, there also seemed to be an indescribable grievance, sore and swollen. Xie Ci swallowed, asking softly, yet also like talking to himself: “The days without me clinging to you—you’ve been quite happy, haven’t you?”

This statement came out of nowhere.

Her fingertips dug into her palms.

“Xu You, it’s all my fault.” He also seemed to realize he had said the wrong thing and immediately apologized.

“…….”

“Xie Ci, what’s wrong with you?” Her voice was very soft, as if just a sigh that could dissipate at any moment.

Xie Ci buried his head in her shoulder and neck. “Nothing…”

“I won’t be angry with you anymore, and please don’t ignore me, okay…Xu You…I will get better.”

Xie Ci had deliberately been cold to her, not going to see her, thinking this way he would feel better. Having been indulged by the girls around him since childhood, he was temperamental when it came to feelings. So when he stumbled with Xu You, Xie Ci’s first reaction was to escape. On that cold winter night, the last bit of pride and self-esteem made him lose his courage and painfully hang up on Xu You’s call.

From then on, Xie Ci felt like his whole person had broken down. On countless late nights he held his phone, editing countless versions of a “breakup letter,” but in the end couldn’t send them out. He couldn’t bear to tell Xu You they should break up.

He would rather give up on himself than say those two words to her.

At school, Xie Ci had countless times wanted to encounter her by chance or do something to attract her attention.

Sometimes when they met on narrow paths, he deliberately ignored Xu You, his eyes looking at the road ahead. His heart was being squeezed by a hand—from far to near, passing by each other, yet his peripheral vision was all her.

Not knowing what psychology drove him, Xie Ci wanted to see her looking distressed and low because of him, thinking perhaps this way he could be happier. So the “chance encounters” escalated, with Xie Ci even passing by her classroom doorway several times a day, pacing back and forth. But Xu You always had that calm appearance—sometimes doing homework, sometimes sitting in her seat chatting with classmates nearby, not noticing him passing by the window at all. She would occasionally smile, and that shallow arc at the corner of her mouth seemed incredibly painful to Xie Ci, even stirring up an inexplicable anger.

Why could Xu You smile?

Why was Xu You so happy?

Didn’t she feel bad?

Did she not care at all, so that’s why she was so happy?

Why was he the only one in pain?

Human emotions are truly wonderful things. Perhaps in the previous second, you’re still stubbornly refusing to give in, not knowing who you’re competing with, tormenting yourself but just unwilling to bow your head first. But then there’s that one second when your tense heart relaxes, when that held breath releases, everything crumbles. Taking the initiative to admit fault, to apologize—it all becomes okay.

Because Xie Ci increasingly discovered that even if he gritted his teeth, he still missed Xu You so much. In this cold war she had unilaterally started, the one being tormented had actually always been just himself.

He used to think the initiative was always in his hands. Later he suddenly realized, having to face reality.

Life and death fatigue arise from greed and desire.

With few desires and non-action, body and mind are at ease.

But his heart had long since departed.

—

On the way back, Xie Ci kept making little movements. From time to time he raised his arm, using his fingertips to touch her palm, and when they made contact, his fingers would curl back.

Playing by himself with endless enjoyment.

Xu You felt ticklish and couldn’t help but move a bit away from him. “Xie Ci, what are you doing?”

“Tsk, so unromantic.” He huffed.

The teaching building for second-year students was not far away. The basketball game had just ended, almost time for afternoon dinner.

Xie Ci walked with both hands in his pockets, swaying leisurely behind Xu You, maintaining a moderate distance, his gaze always following her back. He had just finished playing basketball, his messy black short hair slightly damp with sweat. The blue and white school uniform jacket he wore had its zipper undone, just hanging open. Xie Ci had good skin, a fair and clean face, and was tall—very popular with girls his age.

Occasionally when they met groups of two or three girls coming toward them, arms linked and whispering, they couldn’t help but look him over.

The two had just reconciled. Walking down the road with Xie Ci wearing their alternative “couple outfit,” and being stared at so openly along the way, Xu You couldn’t help but feel a bit self-conscious, which made him swell with pride.

Xie Ci extremely smoothly draped his arm over Xu You’s shoulder, leaning close to her ear, asking in a seemingly casual manner: “Having such a handsome boyfriend like me, you must be so happy, right?”

“……”

Xu You pulled down his hand, eyes looking at the road. “Just walk properly.”

“I’ve never seen anyone as wasteful as you.” He muttered under his breath.

She heard it and looked up at him. “What’s wrong with me?”

“What do you think?”

Xie Ci frowned, his expression very serious. “I’m so good-looking, yet you won’t even look at me properly. Wasting such a handsome face—you’re really getting a bargain.”

“…….”

Xu You was amused by his nonsense and laughed. “First time I’ve seen someone as shameless as you.”

“Thicker than a curved city wall.”

As she finished speaking, she couldn’t help but laugh again.

She had wanted to say this to Xie Ci before, but back when they weren’t familiar, Xu You only dared to complain internally.

Now…

“Xu You, you’re done for, daring to scold me.” Xie Ci wrapped his arm around her neck, forcing her to lean toward him.

Xu You was pulled and stumbled, afraid of people seeing, she struggled a bit and patted his hand. “You’re so annoying, Xie Ci, let me go.”

“First say whether I’m handsome or not. Say it and I’ll let you go.”

“Not handsome, why are you so narcissistic…”

Xie Ci persisted relentlessly, laughing roguishly. “How is it narcissistic? Clearly so handsome—stop deceiving yourself, okay?”

They had only just reconciled, and his rogue nature already showed signs of reviving. Xu You really didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, feeling that Xie Ci’s temperament was really like a child’s—hot and cold, needing to be coaxed.

But actually, Xie Ci wasn’t really narcissistic.

Xu You, having arrived late, didn’t know that someone had once posted on No. 1 High School’s forum a thread titled “Those Boys Who Made Us Go Crazy Over the Years,” which catalogued handsome guys from first to third year. It was later pinned by the moderator, stayed popular for a while, and was even crawled and reposted by other schools. However, this wasn’t a school heartthrob voting thread, but purely a fan service thread. So whenever the original poster introduced someone and attached a photo, below would be friends piling on with private photos.

Xie Ci, as No. 1 High’s famous school bully who was also handsome, was nominated by the original poster at the time. When a side profile photo was posted, it even caused a small explosion on the forum. After all, most people in the school had only heard his name but never seen him.

There was a passage the original poster wrote for him:

“I think everyone must be familiar with this one, heard he’s also a big shot.

First-year Class 9’s Xie Ci. His photos are really hard to find, but this underclassman has a great look. I’ve always wanted to meet him. Actually I’d seen him before, and at first glance couldn’t help but exclaim—this boy is so fair, even fairer than girls.

But I heard he really likes to play basketball, so his physique is super good!!

Actually many girls should have discussed him already, so I won’t say more…”

Then below this post, there were quite a few seeking contact information and asking for full-face photos, with reply counts reaching several hundred:

【OP, post more, not enough to see.】

【My Brother Ci appears…】

【Any others?】

【Just asking if there are other photos, if not we’ll post them ourselves】

【People above please post photos】

【Post photos +1】

【Tsk tsk! Xie Ci was my middle school senior, haven’t seen him in so long, wonder if he’s even more handsome than in middle school~~~~】

【So great (admiring)】

【OP, you’ve really racked up the experience points this time.】

【This damn well deserves an upvote ahhhhhhh, asking if this super handsome guy has a girlfriend!!!】

【Amazing amazing, everyone below chant the slogan: Whether No. 1 High is chaotic or not, Brother Ci has the final say!!!】

【This thread is so much better than that crappy school heartthrob thread next door…】

So the group of fair-weather friends who played well with Xie Ci, without hesitation, contributed all the private photos they had.

There were photos of Xie Ci in just shorts at a hotel, drinking with people at KTV, playing basketball…even a photo of him smoking in the men’s restroom was exposed.

Because of this thread, for a while he really could be recognized walking down the street. It annoyed Xie Ci for quite some time.

—

Song Yifan and the others personally witnessed Xie Ci clinging to Xu You, sending her back to class.

Xu Xiaocheng guessed the two had probably reconciled, and putting his arm around Song Yifan’s shoulders, sighed, “Look at Ah Ci like that, all lovey-dovey again.”

Song Yifan also sighed. “Pretty good, but I really didn’t expect they could reconcile. First time seeing this—a girl who can handle Xie Ci so obediently. Can’t help but be convinced…”

Over the next few days, people in class clearly felt that the oppressive atmosphere surrounding Xie Ci had inexplicably dissipated.

Even the teachers found it strange.

In a few days would be another monthly exam. The liberal arts class teachers distributed a stack of materials, and classes were basically spent memorizing or self-studying. Song Yifan and his group weren’t the type to sit still—they had prepared several activities and seeing Xie Ci finally back to normal, planned to invite him out that afternoon to have fun and liven things up.

Who knew Xie Ci wouldn’t pay any attention at all.

“Are you going or not?”

Song Yifan had been excitedly calling him, but when he kept not responding, couldn’t help getting anxious. He pressed down on the test paper Xie Ci was looking at. “Studied yourself stupid?”

“Annoying or what?” Xie Ci batted his hand away, not even bothering to lift his eyes. “What are you calling me for?”

“To play pool, we haven’t gone out in so long…”

“Not going.”

Before he finished speaking, Xie Ci rejected him outright.

Then Song Yifan suggested several more places to go play, all uniformly rejected by Xie Ci.

Song Yifan was at a loss for words, getting angry inside. “Hey! I’m telling you…”

“Can you stop yapping?” Xie Ci seemed like he was rooted to his chair, not budging an inch, with several books spread on the desk in front of him. “Go play by yourself, don’t look for me, I’m busy.”

Xu Xiaocheng had been reading a gaming newspaper. He shivered with goosebumps all over and turned his head. “Don’t tell me you’re planning to study.”

Song Yifan persisted relentlessly: “Then tell me what you’re doing, are you handling important state affairs? Besides, Xu You has class so you can’t find her anyway.”

“Screw off.”

“I won’t screw off. You answer me first. I can’t let my brother get his thoughts poisoned by textbooks and become a pedantic bookworm.”

Xie Ci glanced at him coolly and said: “Can you have some ambition, Song Yifan? The monthly exam is coming up soon. What are you babbling about? Don’t disturb me while I’m studying.”

“………”

People nearby couldn’t help but snort.

Song Yifan mustered his courage and couldn’t help retorting: “Studying?!! Not that I’m saying anything, buddy, but what are you hoping for? Can you even understand it? Can you not force yourself? You’re not seriously planning to suddenly leap up and catch up to Xu You, are you? Can we stop dreaming?!!”

“Fuck you, screw off!” Xie Ci flew into a rage from embarrassment, grabbed a book and threw it at Song Yifan’s forehead, and kicked him for good measure. “Are you asking for it?”

“Hahahahaha, shit, my bad my bad, don’t hit me.”

The teacher’s angry voice came from the podium, slamming the desk. “Song Yifan!! Pay attention to classroom discipline!! Why are you out of your seat again? Hurry back to your seat!”

A girl in front heard the sound and turned around.

She only saw Song Yifan awkwardly half-squatting on the floor in the aisle, while Xie Ci beside him had his hand propping up his head, looking completely uninvolved.

—

The grade’s basketball tournament lasted a week before ending, with the championship ultimately going to Liberal Arts Class 1. Xie Ci played in all the later games. Perhaps because Xu You promised to come watch and help him hold his clothes, he played each game especially energetically. His positioning was extremely flashy.

Xu You called out “Xie Ci, add oil!” but it was quickly drowned out by the crowd’s screaming. Her eyes watched the white figure constantly running on the court, and the corners of her mouth couldn’t help but lift into a small arc.

The two girls who came with Xu You were from Class Zero. Yu Yi covered her ears, saying with lingering fear: “Too scary how these girls are screaming, so crazy. But why did so many come? It’s definitely more than just two classes…”

Tong Dong said helplessly: “Obviously they all came to see handsome guys, joining in the excitement. What else…”

Class Zero happened to have PE this period, so a few people came to watch for a bit.

“Xu You, when should we leave? We still have a chemistry quiz tonight.” Yu Yi tugged on Xu You’s arm.

“Huh?” She came back to her senses and turned her face. “I’ll leave when class ends. I’ll watch a bit more. You guys go back first.”

“Never mind, it’s fine. We’ll keep you company.”

The two were talking when suddenly the people around erupted in commotion. Eyes from all directions looked this way, the whole venue was stirring.

Yu Yi’s words were interrupted. Her head reflexively lifted. She immediately saw the boy wearing a white jersey on the court. The corners of his mouth lifted in a smile as he ran, his index and middle fingers pressed together touching his temple, then flicking in their direction, as if remotely signaling to someone.

This gesture made the entire basketball court ring with screams.

“—Wahhhhhhhhh.”

The girl standing next to Xu You’s face flushed red, clutching her friend’s hand, repeating softly: “Xie Ci just waved in our direction, right? Oh my god, I’m going to faint…so handsome, so handsome!!!”

Song Yifan ran past Xie Ci and noticed his eyes were still looking in a certain direction. He couldn’t help but jump up and bump his shoulder. “Alright alright, your eyeballs are about to fall out. You’re the most handsome in the whole venue! Stop looking at your girlfriend and look at the ball, boss!”

The basketball whooshed through the air, thrown over by a teammate.

Xie Ci jumped in place, controlling the ball with one hand, laughing. “Mind your own business, screw off.”

—

When evening self-study ended, Xu You organized the scratch paper on her desk and handed the chemistry quiz to the group leader.

The test just now was somewhat difficult, making her work up a forehead full of sweat. Feeling hot, Xu You was just wearing a simple white short-sleeved shirt. She quickly tidied up her things, just about to pick up her bag and leave.

Shen Yang nearby came over with paper and pen. “Hey, Xu You, let me ask you about a question from just now.”

“From the chemistry exam?” Xu You paused her movements.

Shen Yang nodded.

She slung her bag over her shoulder, saying apologetically: “Sorry, I’m in a rush to get home today. The teacher should go over it in class tomorrow, you can listen then…”

“Oh…okay then.” Shen Yang pressed her lips together. “Goodbye, be careful going home.”

Xu You hummed in acknowledgment.

Going down from upstairs, the voice-activated lights were broken, the stairwell very dark, pitch black and hard to see clearly. Right now was the peak period for class dismissal crowds. Xu You was squeezed by people beside her, feeling like she could barely breathe.

Gripping the handrail, she finally made it down to the first floor.

At the corner at the end of the corridor.

Xie Ci leaned against the wall, waiting boredly for Xu You to get out of class.

Finally seeing Xu You walk past, his eyes lit up. In two or three steps he caught up, grabbed her arm in one motion. “Damn, didn’t you see me?”

“Huh?”

Xu You stopped walking, squinting. “It’s too dark, I can’t see clearly.”

On the way home.

Passing an intersection, beside it was an ancient, enormous plane tree with dense branches and leaves. Nearby a streetlamp cast down dim yellow light.

Feeling uncomfortable being stared at by the person beside her, Xu You stopped walking and said to Xie Ci: “You should head home. Don’t stay out too late.”

“It’s only what time.”

“……”

Xie Ci said: “I’ve been seriously studying these past few days.”

“Really?” Xu You pressed her lips together, saying from the heart: “That’s good. Did you understand it?”

“No.”

“…….”

After a long while, Xu You couldn’t help but laugh. She turned her head back to look at him, examining Xie Ci’s expression, earnestly consoling: “It’s okay…take it slowly.”

“I studied hard, isn’t there some kind of reward…”

“What kind of reward do you want?”

Xie Ci didn’t respond, his gaze pausing for a moment.

But his eyes became somewhat…

Somewhat…

Xu You sensed something was wrong, pulled out her hand that he was holding, and quickened her pace forward.

“—Hey, wait.”

Xie Ci called from behind, quickly stepping forward to block her path. Then he pulled her into the deep, dark alley beside them…

“What are you doing?” Xu You, wearing her backpack, was pressed against the wall behind her.

Her head was forced to tilt up.

Xie Ci extended one hand to hold her head in place, the other hand braced against the wall, bending down to kiss her deeply.

“Let me kiss you.”

“I missed you so much…” he murmured lowly between lips and teeth.

Kissing and licking still wasn’t enough—he couldn’t help but gently bite her lips with his teeth.

After a long entanglement, he tilted his head back, pulling away slightly to catch his breath.

Xu You stood on tiptoe, put her arms around Xie Ci’s neck, and gently pecked his cheek.

Xie Ci was caught off guard, his head exploding like fireworks.

“Your reward. Now hurry home.” She said softly in his ear.