HomeThe Whimsical ReturnChapter 21: Heart-Crushing Tactics

Chapter 21: Heart-Crushing Tactics

Pushing open the wooden door that emanated the scent of pine resin, Yun Ye discovered the small courtyard was exceptionally tidy. There was none of the bloody stench typically found in a butcher’s home. The earthen ground had been tamped down very flat, and beneath the wooden rack was a layer of fresh soil—the young man had shoveled away the blood-stained earth and replaced it with new. A large wooden barrel used for scalding pigs was overturned in the corner. A rope hung diagonally across the courtyard, positioned precisely at throat height, thin and gleaming with a metallic luster.

When Yun Ye touched the rope with his hand, it emitted a low humming sound. This was clearly a mechanism designed to decapitate people. He’d never seen rope like this before—it wasn’t steel wire. If it were, Yun Ye would have asked him for his cell phone number.

“Do you have a lot of this type of rope? Why not give me some?” Yun Ye questioned the empty courtyard. He didn’t believe for a moment that Dan Ying was far away. If he didn’t keep this fellow occupied, how would the old soldiers go find Sun Simiao to obtain that pollen that made people itch all over? Last time he’d seen Old Sun having his students collect a large bag of it.

Sure enough, someone answered from overhead: “This is the skin of an iron-thread snake. A two-foot-long snake only yields half a foot of usable skin. I’ve been collecting for a long time and only have some in reserve. If you like it, I’ll give it all to you.”

Yun Ye wasn’t polite and immediately began untying the rope. The knot was strange—not the type commonly used by Guanzhong people, somewhat resembling a sailor’s knot, with complex figure-eight wrapping. Yun Ye had learned this before. With one pull from the decorative knot at the base, the rope fell down. He methodically wound up the rope. These elastic ropes, though two or three zhang long, occupied little space when gripped in hand, yet their weight was considerable.

Dan Ying jumped down from the roof and watched Yun Ye’s actions with great interest. Only after seeing him tuck the rope into his clothes did he speak: “You’re the strangest person I’ve ever met. You know what? I’ve been observing you for a long time, especially what you said to that Bai Qi Si general a few days ago. I’m curious—how did you know about the situation there? Have you traveled to many places?”

No matter how formidable he was, his childish nature was still completely exposed. Curiosity was precisely the most fatal flaw for someone his age, the same disposition as Li Tai. Yun Ye sat astride the wooden bar in the courtyard, leaning back against the rack behind him, reaching behind the wooden frame to pull out a large bag of broad beans. After opening it to check there was no mold, he tossed one in his mouth and ate it with relish.

“How did you know I would put broad beans behind the wooden frame?” Dan Ying was even more astonished. He was certain that after entering, Yun Ye hadn’t looked behind the wooden frame. His body tensed up, like a leopard about to pounce.

“The most comfortable spot in your courtyard is this wooden bar—just right for lying on to watch the stars. If I didn’t sit here, where else would I sit? Just staring stupidly at stars isn’t a young person’s style—at the very least you need some snacks, or perhaps a pot of wine. Of course, these are all guesses. Most importantly, you shouldn’t have added so many spices when cooking beans. I smelled it.”

Dan Ying knocked himself heavily on the head, only then relaxing his body and breathing a sigh of relief.

Yun Ye was quite worried. If he’d heard what Yun Ye said to Hong Cheng, it proved that night he wasn’t far from him. When it came to matters concerning his own life, Yun Ye was never careless. That night the guards should have searched very carefully, yet he’d still managed to get close. Thinking about how he’d once taught special forces tactics, cold sweat ran down his back.

“Do you still want to assassinate the Emperor?” Yun Ye got straight to the point. Adolescence was a person’s most reckless yet most suspicious period. They scorned everything while doubting everything. It was better to be direct.

“I’m not killing him anymore. I made a vow to only strike once. That night, the eunuch dozing upstairs was terrifying. I had no confidence in escaping from his hands. Plus, what you said was very interesting. I listened with such fascination that I forgot about making my move.”

Dan Ying was quite frank. It was clear he was trying hard to win Yun Ye’s favor.

“When did you bastard start scheming after my sister? A poor butcher actually pursuing an official family’s young lady—aren’t you ashamed? Can you even afford to support her? Will you butcher pigs while my sister turns pig intestines?”

Yun Ye asked while chewing broad beans, trying to put himself on equal footing with him as much as possible.

Dan Ying’s face flushed bright red. Being questioned about the most secret place in his heart, anyone’s complexion would turn unpleasant. After hemming and hawing for a long time, he ran back into the house, brought out a large bundle, and opened it in front of Yun Ye. Under the evening sun’s reflection, it glittered brilliantly, and a proud expression appeared on the young man’s face.

Yun Ye glanced at it and sighed, jumping down from the bar. He picked up a green glass cup and held it up to the sunlight—it was full of bubbles. The bundle also contained nothing but irregularly shaped glass beads. In the Great Tang, this might be considered a considerable fortune, but in Yun Ye’s eyes, these could only be a pile of garbage. Anyone in the modern era willing to spend ten yuan on such a pile of junk would be laughed to death.

He tossed the glass cup back onto the garbage pile. With a crisp sound, it broke in half. Dan Ying’s eyes nearly turned red—he’d robbed a Western Regions merchant caravan to obtain these finest items, and now they were in two pieces.

“Why are your eyes red? A pile of junk and you have the face to show it off—how embarrassing. You want to marry my sister with this garbage? You can afford to lose face, but I can’t. Hurry up and put it away—it’s disgusting to look at.”

Yun Ye’s contemptuous expression was extremely harsh, shattering the young man’s self-esteem with a hammer. Yun Ye could almost hear the sound of Dan Ying’s heart breaking. Dan Ying roared at Yun Ye: “If you have the ability, bring out glass better than this, and I’ll… admire you.”

He was a clever boy after all—the words “do as you please” reached his lips but were forcibly changed to “admire you.” Yun Ye was disappointed, looking at Dan Ying eagerly: “What use is mere admiration? Why not make a more serious vow?”

“You think I’m stupid? Your household is a famously wealthy family in Chang’an. You probably have things better than these. I’m not falling for that. If you can produce something better, I’ll submit to you.”

Yun Ye pulled from his clothes a mirror only one inch square and casually tossed it to Dan Ying. This was the finest colorless glass the Yun family had developed so far. Yun Ye had used mercury to corrode silver foil, ultimately obtaining only three one-inch perfect mirror surfaces, which he cut into three small round mirrors. He gave one to his grandmother, one to Xinyue, and kept one for himself. Xiao Ya had begged eight times, but Yun Ye hadn’t given her one, so she was still angry.

Dan Ying reached out to catch the round mirror. After just one glance, his face turned ashen. In the mirror, he saw sword-like eyebrows, a nose like a suspended bell, downy hair covering his lips, and clear eyelashes—quite the handsome young man, except his complexion was poor.

“Still saying what you brought isn’t garbage? If you showed these things to Daya, she’d laugh herself to death, and cry herself to death too.” Yun Ye launched his caustic tongue offensive, preparing to completely crush the young man’s pitiful self-esteem in one vigorous effort.

Dan Ying held the round mirror to return it to Yun Ye, but Yun Ye curled his lip and said: “You keep that one. I just took your rope and broke your junk—consider it my compensation. Tomorrow I’ll have household servants make me one the size of a palm. This mirror is too shabby—I’m embarrassed to let people see it.”

Dan Ying placed the mirror on the ground, raised his leg, and kicked a thigh-thick wooden post buried in the earth, breaking it in two. With reddened eyes, he asked Yun Ye: “My martial skills should be worthy of Daya now, right?” This was his last hope.

Yun Ye looked at the broken post, then rolled up Dan Ying’s trouser leg, pointing at a large swollen red area: “Not there yet. My sister is a girl, naturally can’t learn your crude ways, kicking wooden posts at every turn. Practicing martial arts and studying are both matters of proficiency plus comprehension—what’s so impressive about that? Daya has been well-versed in the classics since childhood and has already gotten started in mathematics. Oh yes, I have two practice problems she did today right here. If you can solve them, I swear I’ll approve of your marriage. Outstanding young men aren’t easy to find. See how generous I am? What a serious vow I made, not like you with your flimsy ‘I submit’ three words, just fooling me.”

Dan Ying, whose eyes had long turned red, snatched the practice problems. He was quite confident in himself. Having trained in martial arts with a hermit for ten years, he wasn’t unfamiliar with scholarly pursuits either. He didn’t believe Daya could have much learning. The only reason he’d set his sights on Daya was that her temperament and speech closely resembled his mother in his memories, giving rise to a natural sense of intimacy. As a bandit’s descendant, encountering such a woman, when else would he seize her if not now?

Looking at the problems, his heart sank. He didn’t even know what was written on them—just some circles, lines, and gourds, and even half-gourds. What were these?

“Don’t think I’m deceiving you. These are new academic writings from the Western Regions. Daya has long mastered this knowledge. These mathematical formulas are called inequalities. Have you heard that name? Want me to explain more clearly? You’re right next to the academy every day, not lacking food or clothing—would it kill you to go to the academy and gain some knowledge? Today killing this one, tomorrow chopping down that one—when will it end?”

“Your father sought righteousness and obtained righteousness—his great name will surely shine through the ages. Your mother died for your father—she too was a virtuous woman. They lived such splendid lives. Do you need to cry and wail every day seeking revenge for them? Did your mother say on her deathbed that you must take revenge?”

Yun Ye was gambling—gambling on a mother’s natural instinct to love her child. She definitely wouldn’t let her child establish such a powerful enemy as Li Er. Whether successful or not, neither would be her child’s fortune.

“You know who my father is? You also know who my mother is? You know about their affairs?”

“Er Xian Manor—besides Dan Xiongxin, who else could it be? A princess—besides Wang Shichong’s daughter, who else could it be? If you weren’t Dan Xiongxin’s son, do you think I’d risk danger coming to your house to say all this nonsense? The army would have surrounded us long ago.”

“Before my mother committed suicide, she told me to marry well, have children, and live on.” Dan Ying said expressionlessly.

Suddenly he straightened up and glared at Yun Ye, shouting: “I’m not willing to accept it! My master said I’m a martial arts genius. The world is vast—nowhere I cannot go. I want to bet with you. I will definitely break through your mechanisms to see Daya. If I lose, I’ll listen to you. If I win, I won’t ask you to betroth Daya to me either. You need only say in front of everyone that I’m a first-class good man in the world!”

Yun Ye’s heart finally settled. Looking at Dan Ying with pity, he said: “As you wish!”

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