HomeThe Whimsical ReturnChapter 28: The Price of a Totem

Chapter 28: The Price of a Totem

With a casual motion, he swept the broken wolf body off the table, letting it shatter into pieces on the ground. He pulled out a handkerchief from his bosom and carefully wiped down the remaining wolf. Seeing a stain that wouldn’t come off, he breathed out some moisture, padded it with the handkerchief and carefully rubbed it twice before nodding with satisfaction.

The great elder of Tuyuhun trembled as he walked onto the stage and gathered the shattered glass pieces together, as if wanting to stick them back together. His cloudy eyes brimmed with tears. His hands were cut in several places by the sharp edges of the glass, blood dripping freely.

The blood-stained glass quickly displayed an enchanting red color. The old man dejectedly placed the broken glass on the ground and said to Yun Ye in despair, “Why did you do this? You priced all your treasures at one hundred strings, and we gave you nearly three hundred times that price. Why are you still not satisfied? Although cattle and sheep are numerous on the grasslands, they’re not like wild grass everywhere. It takes two years for a calf to grow into a full cow, during which it must survive two terrifying winters. On days of heavy snowfall, herdsmen must still drive their cattle across the grasslands to forage. After every winter, at least thirty percent of cattle and sheep cannot endure.”

“Every dead cow cuts into the hearts of herdsmen suffering from hunger and cold. They say the Han people are the most gentle race—why don’t you have even half a thread of compassion? Six thousand cattle represent the entire property of a ten-thousand-person tribe. Give them to you, and tens of thousands will not survive this year’s harsh winter. Is this the compassionate heart of a Great Tang Empire lord?”

These words may have touched the sorrow of the nomadic peoples. Nearly all the barbarians lowered their heads; some vulnerable ones even wept loudly. Even the merchants in the theater were moved to great emotion. Wealth worth ten to twenty thousand strings destroyed in an instant—it wasn’t just the barbarians whose hearts bled.

Li Jing’s eyeballs rolled around. Wei Zheng was furious, nearly ready to jump down from upstairs. Even Li Chengqian, who had been flirting with a beauty, stood up in shock. Fang Xuanling and Du Ruhui looked as if bereaved of their parents. Tang Jian’s face was ashen. Xiao Yu shook all over like chaff being sifted.

Blue veins popped out on Empress Zhangsun’s neck, her eyes nearly spitting fire. If she weren’t in the theater, she would definitely have Yun Ye beaten with at least thirty strokes—no, fifty strokes! One hammer stroke and one thousand cattle were gone. This was no longer败家—it was造孽!

Li Er watched the reactions of everyone below expressionlessly, then suddenly smiled silently and said to Zhangsun, “I’m a bit tired. I’ll rest for a moment. Call me after Yun Ye finishes selling the wolf.” Having said this, he buried himself in the soft chair and closed his eyes with a smile.

Yun Ye felt helpless. How could these people not understand the principle of scarcity creating value? In later times, when selling Yuan blue-and-white porcelain, if there were two identical vases, generally one would be smashed and the remaining one sold for three to four times, even ten times the price without anyone batting an eye. How was it that here, one by one they all became idiots? He had finally gotten such an opportunity to slash people with a knife—missing it would make him the real fool.

“Since ancient times, nomadic peoples have lived in harsh environments where they cannot guarantee the next day. They fight with heaven, fight with earth, fight with people, and must also encounter various disasters. Epidemics among cattle and sheep, droughts, and white disasters occur year after year.”

“I lived on the grasslands for more than half a year and deeply suffered from it. Summer mosquitoes and flies, winter cold—I ate my fill of bitterness. I saw frozen corpses hard as boards beneath white snow, and I saw dead human skulls kicked around like balls. In times of hunger and cold, those herdsmen huddled together for warmth, placing the old and weak on the outermost ring, wrapping the children and able-bodied in the center of the crowd. Those freezing old and weak cried out through the night to resist the cold. Thinking of these things, my heart breaks.”

Anyone who witnessed such tragedy would naturally feel compassion arise. The people of Great Tang were all kind. Hearing Yun Ye’s description, they themselves felt a chill through their bodies. Those barbarians empathized even more deeply. Instantly the barbarians in the theater cried into tearful messes. Whether strong or not, embracing each other was the only way to feel a bit of comfort.

The great elder raised his head, eyes brimming with tears, and said to Yun Ye, “Can we offer four thousand cattle for the remaining wolf?”

Yun Ye was also crying. Thinking of his own experiences on the grasslands brought sorrow welling from his heart. Hearing the great elder’s offer, he wiped away tears and said chokingly, “No. I won’t sell for less than seven thousand cattle.” His voice wasn’t loud, but it was exceptionally firm.

Yuchi Gong collapsed his chair with his rear end. Looking at Yun Ye as if seeing a ghost, he grabbed the equally dumbstruck Cheng Yaojin and asked, “Did you go to hell? How did you bring back such a demon to the mortal world?”

Old Cheng shook his head woodenly, then nudged Old Niu saying, “Did you teach him this? Among us old brothers, only you could be this ruthless.”

Niu Jinda irritably pushed Cheng Yaojin away, saying, “I have no problem cutting people down, but to have me simultaneously shed tears of sorrow for the other party while ruthlessly swindling them—I don’t have that ability.”

Li Jing looked at the tear-streaked Yun Ye, then at the great elder who had already entered a petrified state, and suddenly felt all his earlier concerns were for naught. Just now he was still thinking about how to deal with these damned barbarians. Now he discovered that when these barbarians returned to the grasslands, if they had pants to wear it would mean their great god was giving them full protection.

On the small platform, the bit of ambiguous feeling that had just risen between the Crown Prince and his fiancée had completely vanished. Su Shi asked the Crown Prince with concern, “This is your best friend?”

Li Chengqian nodded, then suddenly smiled very happily. He spun fiercely twice on the platform, pulled Su Shi up, embraced her head and kissed down hard. Before Su Shi could react, one hand had already burrowed into Su Shi’s bodice and began kneading…

Empress Zhangsun’s legs went soft and she sat on Li Er’s lap behind her, covering her face without making a sound. She swore that Yun Ye was absolutely the blackest-hearted, thickest-skinned, most shameless fellow she had ever seen in her life. Before, whenever she did anything slightly unfair to him, she felt guilty. Now it seemed this was entirely because she was too soft-hearted and too foolish.

Li Er opened one eye and glanced at the Empress. Not minding his wife sitting very inelegantly on his lap, he shifted his head to find a comfortable position and continued sleeping. He planned to watch this excellent show from beginning to end tonight.

Several furious Xueyantuo people prepared to rush onto the stage and fight Yun Ye to the death, but were blocked one by one by Yun Family’s old soldiers. Dan Ying now didn’t even have the courage to make eye contact with Yun Ye.

Seeing no movement from the other side, Yun Ye raised his small hammer again and gestured at the giant wolf’s neck. If the great elder and Xueyantuo people dared say half a word of refusal, he would smash the statue without hesitation. He understood very clearly that the Western Turks didn’t covet their cattle and sheep. The Ashina clan controlled vast territories from Jinshan in the east to the Western Sea kingdoms in the west. The Xueyantuo and Tuyuhun’s few thousand cattle and sheep were insufficient to serve as bargaining chips to influence the Western Turks. Now the Western Turkic nobility were numerous, each claiming to be the orthodox descendants of the Heavenly Wolf God, all suppressing various factions. If Tuyuhun and Xueyantuo wanted to avoid Great Tang’s military might and establish good relations with Western Turkic nobles, they couldn’t do without this wolf.

The great elder looked back at the ashen-faced Xueyantuo envoy. The two exchanged glances and silently nodded. The great elder, hunched over and appearing even more aged and helpless, opened his blood-filled mouth and said with difficulty to Yun Ye, “Deal.”

Yun Ye, whose face had just been covered in tears, immediately beamed with joy. Embracing the great elder’s body, he said, “How wonderful! The transaction is successful. I think no one will offer a higher price now. Elder, what an advantageous deal you’ve made! Just some cattle and sheep, yet you’ve obtained such a treasure. Look at this wolf—how elegant its bearing is! Look at these teeth, so sharp…”

“He Shao! He Shao! Quickly go to the cattle pens outside the city and select seven thousand good cattle. Take my token to leave the city. First thing tomorrow morning, drive the cattle to our pens. Pick more cows. Last time you brought back mostly bulls from the grasslands—you were tricked by those grassland barbarians. This time you must be careful. You can still tell bulls from cows, right?”

Pig-headed He Shao smiled so broadly on his fat face that only his large mouth and white teeth could be seen. He fumbled around on Yun Ye’s body to retrieve the token, straining to open his eyes as he went to find the Xueyantuo and Tuyuhun people to negotiate settlement matters.

The elder holding the glass giant wolf, upon hearing Yun Ye’s words, nearly coughed blood with every step as he descended the stage. He handed the giant wolf to the Xueyantuo envoy who came to support him, then softly collapsed to the ground unconscious. He only hoped this giant wolf could become the totem of the Western Turks and secure ten years of peace for the Tuyuhun people.

The Goryeo envoys gloated at the barbarians’ misfortune. Being able to stand on the shore and watch others struggle desperately in the water was a kind of enjoyment. The棒子 had always been this way—even a thousand years later, not much had changed.

The Xueyantuo people and Tuyuhun people all left. Those merchants who had been standing without seats took the opportunity to occupy them. As merchants, they greatly enjoyed Yun Ye’s performance and didn’t feel Yun Ye had done anything wrong. Pursuing maximum profit was the embodiment of a merchant’s existential value. Having witnessed this scene today, each one benefited greatly, feeling the thirty strings entrance fee was truly money well spent.

When one rooster dies, another crows. People’s pursuit of treasures is endless. Some fellows burdened with missions had long been eager to try. If the large treasures were beyond their reach, surely smaller items could be theirs?

The auction wouldn’t come to a screeching halt just because some decrepit old man coughed up a few mouthfuls of blood. Rather, it became even more heated. The women who had gone to watch the fashion show also returned satisfied, chattering about what jewelry would match their new clothes. The sandalwood boxes held by maids were filled with freshly selected glass jewelry. Especially the various colored hair ornaments and hairpins left them intoxicated. Some impatient ones had already inserted them in their hair to show off. If their men saw these, they would surely overturn tables in fury. How could Yun Ye’s items be cheap? Hadn’t they just seen him make the barbarians—the best at doing business—cough up dozens of taels of blood?

Servants quickly came onstage to clean the platform. Some careful ones even brought water basins and meticulously wiped away all the blood the great elder had coughed up. They even sprayed a bit of perfume on the stage—their lord was, after all, a clean person.

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