Duan He’s facial expression was spectacular—various colors continuously appeared on his face. Yun Ye watched Duan He without blinking, his eyes not missing a single change. He had waited a long time for this moment and was unwilling to miss any variation.
Liu Jinbao was very nervous. He was extremely worried that Duan He would suddenly become enraged and cause injury to the Marquis. In the end, after Duan He’s face turned completely pale, he apologized to Yun Ye, then leaped high up from his horse’s back. It seemed he used all his body’s strength—with one punch he smashed the head of a horse. That horse, having received a heavy blow, crashed thunderously to the ground. Its four hooves kicked twice before becoming completely still. This single punch had completely scattered the horse’s brains.
Wang Cai retreated backward in terror. Yun Ye stroked Wang Cai’s head to comfort him a few times before it finally calmed down.
“Noisy!” Only after Duan He punched a horse to death did he settle down. That horse had merely snorted loudly, which brought upon it the disaster of death.
“Jumping too high, flashy but impractical. On the battlefield, jumping this high, you would have long been shot down by enemy sharpshooters like a bird. Using excessive force only harms yourself. Old Duan, why do you do this to yourself? Not having been on the battlefield isn’t your fault. His Majesty always keeps you all in the rear to guard the national destiny. Don’t do this again next time. With some experience in the future, you’ll certainly become a talented general.”
“You should keep your seal safe in the future. Don’t let it be casually stolen by the one-legged bandit. Little brother fought the one-legged bandit for more than thirty thousand rounds on Meiling before luckily snatching back the seal. You should learn from little brother! Look, I tied a rope to my seal and hung it on my waist—this way it’s much safer.”
Not having been on the battlefield was Duan He’s greatest regret. Although whenever the Great Tang had military affairs, he would invariably be the first to request battle, unfortunately Li Er never deployed the Xuanjia Army on campaigns. Even when he did use the Xuanjia Army, he only borrowed a small portion to serve as his personal guards. The era when Li Er could personally charge into battle formations had long passed and would never return, so Duan He was still a battlefield novice to this day.
He absolutely didn’t believe Yun Ye’s nonsense—what did it mean to fight for thirty thousand rounds? He didn’t believe a single word. But he believed one thing: his official seal was indeed retrieved by Yun Ye. Of this he was absolutely certain. The person who stole the seal must be someone Yun Ye knew, and perhaps their relationship was very close. Today he had definitely suffered this silent loss. Being lectured as a novice by someone else, he could only forcefully endure and accept it, because even if you beat him to death, he wouldn’t believe that Yun Ye would send someone to steal his seal—it was absolutely impossible.
After Yun Ye obtained the seal, he began to extort him. This was his right. If the situation were reversed, he would do the same, perhaps even more excessively. Thinking about how in the future he could no longer show off his power in front of Yun Ye, waves of dejection arose within him.
“I wonder if Brother Yun saw a thumb ring while fiercely battling the one-legged bandit? It was a relic from my late father and absolutely cannot be lost. If it can be recovered, Duan He would be immensely grateful.”
After he forcefully endured clasping his fists and bowing to thank Yun Ye, he raised his head and immediately saw a thumb ring on Yun Ye’s raised thumb—it was precisely the one he had lost.
Yun Ye jumped down from his horse. Extortion and jokes must have limits. Since this item was left behind by Duan Zhixuan, Yun Ye could not treat this object carelessly, or else he would become mortal enemies with the Duan Family, fighting to the death.
He removed the thumb ring from his finger and, grasping it respectfully with both hands, presented it to Duan He, saying apologetically, “Little brother was rude. I truly did not know this was Uncle Duan’s relic. Please forgive me, Brother Duan.”
After Duan He received the thumb ring and thanked Yun Ye once more, he said a few words to his subordinates. Very quickly, the soldiers in the main street all disappeared without a trace. Yun Ye happily accepted Duan He’s invitation to sit briefly at his residence—this was also, of course, to supervise that Duan He would fulfill his promise.
The Duan residence within the military camp was not large. Looking at the layout here, Yun Ye furrowed his brows deeply. How did this child Xiao Miao obtain Duan He’s seal from here? In his view, even a fly couldn’t get in! When he had time, he must ask her properly.
After settling into their seats as host and guest, Duan He poured Yun Ye a cup of tea and said dejectedly, “It’s just like this—no one can doubt the combat power of the Xuanjia Army. If it was done by an internal traitor, your foolish older brother wouldn’t be this distressed. Now hearing Brother Yun say the one who acted was a solitary bandit, that truly distresses your foolish older brother. This matter concerns the glory of the Xuanjia Army. Please speak truthfully, Brother Yun, and inform me of the details. It’s not too late to mend the fold after the sheep are lost!”
“Old Duan, let me speak frankly. Your seal was indeed stolen from your residence by someone. The Xuanjia Army’s defenses have loopholes. Originally they intended to beat you up, but didn’t succeed, so they casually took your seal as punishment. As for how they got in, I truly don’t know. Later when I find out, I’ll definitely tell you.”
While the two men were talking, a lean and wiry man walked in. Very impolitely, he demanded that Duan He produce the seal for his inspection. Duan He didn’t seem to show any unhappiness. In front of Yun Ye, he took out the seal and let the man authenticate it—doing so was a very rude thing. Both men acted as if nothing was amiss.
“The seal is genuine.” That man examined the seal for a long time before confirming its authenticity and apologized to Duan He.
Yun Ye thought this fellow would leave, but unexpectedly this person actually turned his head toward him and opened his mouth to ask, “This humble officer heard that the seal was recovered by Marquis Yun. I wonder where the thief is now?”
You’re already calling yourself “this humble officer,” so why does your questioning tone still sound like you’re the Grand Marshal of All Military Forces Under Heaven? Yun Ye had never had any good feelings for this type of person, so nonsense immediately came from his mouth: “I fought the solitary bandit for thirty thousand rounds on Meiling and exhausted all my efforts before snatching back the seal.”
“Marquis Yun, I’m asking you where the thief is now?”
“I fought the thief for thirty thousand rounds on Meiling and exhausted all my efforts before recovering the seal.” No matter what this fellow asked, Yun Ye used this sentence to deflect, while deflecting he chatted and laughed happily with Duan He. It seemed Duan He also disliked this fellow. Seeing that Yun Ye ignored him, this person gritted his teeth and walked out. It seemed he still wasn’t giving up.
Although Yun Ye and Duan He were adversarial in military affairs, as colleagues in the military, drinking a cup of wine together wasn’t any big matter. When Yun Ye drunkenly emerged from Duan He’s residence, it was already afternoon. They couldn’t leave today, so Yun Ye rested in the guest rooms provided by the Xuanjia Army, preparing to set out early the next morning. Touching the Xuanjia Army document in his bosom made him happy—his household was about to gain fifty more fierce soldiers. He had already signed his name and instructed Liu Jinbao to transmit the document back to the capital through the military’s fast horses.
The next day at dawn, Yun Ye’s party set out. Walking overland was clearly faster than the water route. Boats going upstream truly had no speed to speak of, not to mention they needed to make a large detour.
Wang Cai ran very enthusiastically, always wanting to run to the very front. Yun Ye never placed any restrictions on Wang Cai, letting him do everything according to his nature. As a result, this run took them from the warm south all the way to Shangzhou. The clothing on their bodies continually thickened. By the time they ran to Shangzhou, everyone was wearing heavy furs. Three thousand li of distant road consumed a full two months, running from the eleventh month all the way to the first month.
After entering the Shangzhou postal station, Yun Ye decided not to continue. They would stay here for three days, not only because today was New Year’s Day, but also because everyone was already exhausted beyond measure, especially since there was a pregnant woman in the party—they dared not risk their lives rushing along the road anymore.
From Shangzhou to Chang’an, only three hundred li of road remained, but Yun Ye felt the remaining three hundred li were as long as ten thousand li. Perhaps this fulfilled what people often said: “Those who walk a hundred li consider ninety li only halfway there.”
On New Year’s Eve, one should naturally keep vigil through the night. Yun Ye swore with complete confidence that he would definitely persist until daybreak. Who would have known that the vigil activity had only just begun when he was already snoring loudly in deep sleep. A group of men slept in utter darkness while three women remained in high spirits. Hou Junji’s concubine told Feng Niang and Xiao Miao stories of the past for the entire night. Xiao Miao didn’t care—at the Yun Family, she had experienced even better New Year’s Days than what the concubine described.
Feng Niang’s gaze became distant, however. She couldn’t imagine a Five Grains Tree four or five zhang high. She also couldn’t imagine the scene of hundreds of maids and servants together paying New Year’s respects to their master. She didn’t understand what was meant by an imperial banquet either, nor could she imagine how grand the scene must be when the Crown Princess visited her parents. All of this had become yesterday’s fleeting clouds because of her father-in-law’s one mistaken idea.
Xiao Miao liked stories about talented scholars and beautiful ladies, but the concubine couldn’t tell such stories. This disappointed her. She patiently listened to the past events of the Hou Family, but in the end truly couldn’t bear it any longer and interjected, “My household also has many people! Every year on this day, Sister Xinyue fills everyone’s money pouches full. The fried dough twists, meatballs, and fried dough sticks from the kitchen are piled up like a mountain. Fried meat and prepared cold meat are piled on mats—anyone can take them and eat. This is what the Marquis secretly told us, only warning us not to get caught by Sister Xinyue.”
“Hehe, one time I used a rope through the wall to loop around a fat chicken, wanting to pull it over. I tugged but it didn’t move. When I looked over the wall, I discovered the rope was looped around the cook’s neck—he was being strangled until his eyes started rolling back.”
“Sister Xiao Ya even complained that I wanted to kill the cook. She dragged me away running. In my panic I threw away the rope. Sister Xinyue was chasing us from behind with a feather duster, but didn’t catch us and was tripped by her own skirt instead. Sister Na Rimu clapped her hands laughing loudly, so Sister Xinyue stopped chasing us and switched to whipping Sister Na Rimu with the feather duster instead.”
Xiao Miao was completely immersed in her own memories. She didn’t see the shock in the concubine’s and Feng Niang’s eyes. The concubine didn’t dare imagine what her fate would be if she mocked the household’s matriarch. Feng Niang also didn’t dare imagine what kind of image it was for a Fourth Rank Lady of Imperial Command to be running around everywhere with a feather duster hitting people, because Hou Jie had told her that Xinyue was a very dignified household matriarch.
“During New Year’s at home, there’s constantly the clattering sound of mahjong tiles all day long. Sister Xiao Ya taught me several times, but unfortunately I’m too stupid—I can never learn it. Auntie Tianmoji knows some very strange methods. I heard from Xiao Ya that practicing these methods will make breasts grow larger, but I secretly practiced them and they didn’t get any bigger.”
“Sister Feng Niang, are your breasts so full because you also practiced these methods?”