Li Anlan agreed with a smile, then picked up the two letters from the table and looked at them, saying: “Since you have such important official duties at hand, why are you discussing family matters? During the Warring States period, the famous general Zhao She never concerned himself with family matters once he received official duties. Can’t you learn from him?”
Yun Ye nodded, indicating he had been taught, then pushed Li Anlan out the door and said to her: “My son and I need to study the army’s marching route carefully. From now on, you are not permitted to see me. Ten years from now, if fate allows, we shall meet again.” Having said this, he shut the door tightly. Li Anlan kicked at it several times from outside, but seeing no one would open the door for her, she could only leave in frustration.
“Son, your old man here most detests this type of woman who pushes people to improve themselves. If your old man becomes Zhao She today, tomorrow you’ll dare to become Zhao Kuo. Men’s affairs, when women meddle in them, will only lead to disaster. Your old man here can say I’ve learned this lesson painfully. Just thinking about it makes me regret it for three lifetimes. You must learn from your old man’s lesson—when you grow up, don’t be useless and chase after women.” The child babbled in response to Yun Ye, mouth open wide, constantly drooling.
Hadn’t Li’er always been understanding and accommodating? How had he become so forceful now? These years he had been invincible in battle, victorious in every attack. The only one who had made him lose face, Xie Li, was now living a life worse than death at the Court of State Ceremonial. Whenever the thought struck, he would be dragged out for exhibition to perform songs and dances for the Great Tang’s ruler and ministers. Last time, according to Cheng Chumo, this fellow had two small drums tied around his waist and red flowers stuck in his hair, singing and dancing at the celebration. His dancing was quite beautiful, winning thunderous applause from the entire hall. Li’er had specially rewarded him with a hundred taels of gold and permitted him to go out and stroll around Chang’an once a year, for just three hours.
Had Li’er overestimated his own strength? That couldn’t be possible. This fellow was the grandfather of playing the pig to eat the tiger. Whenever Li’er appeared to become muddled, Yun Ye knew he was actually not far from victory. What was he trying to accomplish this time?
Yun Ye wasn’t worried about transporting grain. He only needed to follow the seasonal winds. This strong wind would carry him all the way to the Liaodong Peninsula, and during this time there wouldn’t be any major storms. This was heaven’s grace. As long as the ships didn’t leak and sink on their own, there would be no danger. However, he couldn’t draw sea charts. This voyage was very important—they needed to mark out reefs and waterways on site. Along the way, they also needed to pay attention to hydrological conditions. Strategic locations needed on-site inspection, and places that could open harbors needed personnel to conduct on-site surveys.
The ships scouting ahead would certainly be very dangerous, but finding fellows like Dongyu shouldn’t be difficult. They enjoyed riding on sinking ships. Dongyu always told Liu Jinbao that if the ship sank, he could definitely bring the Marquis to shore—twenty or thirty li of water surface was nothing to him. That damned dog, couldn’t he wish me well? Talking about sinking ships on the ocean—what bad luck.
A warm, comforting sensation entered his embrace, rousing Yun Ye from his contemplation. His own son lay in his father’s arms sleeping soundly, his little pecker spouting a clear stream of water. Not daring to disturb the child, he waited until he finished urinating before placing him on the table to check his clothing.
Truly worthy of being his son—even his urination demonstrated such skill. His own clothes and pants hadn’t gotten a single drop on them, while his father’s crotch was wet over a large area, as if he had peed his pants.
“Promising indeed, son! This is how you should handle things in the future. This is the standard aristocratic way of doing things.” He called for Li Anlan to come in, but no one answered. Preparing to go to the front hall to find her, just as he passed through the moon gate, he heard Liu Fulu’s obsequious voice.
“Your Highness Princess, now that Lingnan has been swept clean by the Marquis, this is actually an excellent opportunity for governance. The mountain god’s drumming killed off many of the unruly troublemakers. Now you only need to dispatch those five hundred military officers, and with another five hundred remaining soldiers forming the constabulary, placing them under the command of us civil officials, this humble official assures you that within three years, the Liao territories will be governed so well that doors need not be locked at night and lost items will not be picked up from the roads. You can rest assured. By that time, if you have leisure to visit Chang’an and stay for a year or half a year, nothing untoward will occur.”
“Alas, I am but a woman. Unlike you men who can accomplish great things, I only seek to govern my territory well—prosperous, harmonious, peaceful and joyful. If I can leave this to my child in the future, I will be completely satisfied.” This woman would play the pitiful card whenever she had the chance. Although this would make Liu Fulu and the others willing to sacrifice everything for her, it made him lose face.
This made him angry. He forgot that his crotch was still damp. Holding the child, he strode through the door and said to Liu Fulu: “Govern Lingnan well. If you can atone for your crimes through meritorious service, you might return to Guanzhong. People from Guanzhong say: ‘Don’t go to Sichuan when young, don’t leave the pass when old.’ After working for a few years, as long as there’s an opportunity, I’ll let you bury yourselves in your ancestral graves. But if you ruin things here for me, I’ll send you into the deep mountain forests to keep company with blind bears.”
A dozen disgraced officials bowed in gratitude together. Under the Marquis’s imposing authority, they trembled like quails as they retreated from the reception hall.
“My, my, my! The pants-wetting Marquis has such great prestige! This little woman is truly enlightened. But since you’ve wet your pants, couldn’t you change them? Lecturing your subordinates like this, doesn’t it diminish your dignity somewhat?”
“The climate of Lingnan is hot and dry, making people irritable and confused. This Marquis precisely needed child’s urine as an antidote. My son, anxious about what troubles his old father, sent down sweet rain to ease his father’s worries—most timely indeed! What’s improper about it? You, a mere woman, receiving these wretched men in the reception hall with no elder supervising above and no servants accompanying below—you have already lost womanly virtue. How dare you be so arrogant!”
Hearing this, Li Anlan said with a laugh: “Well, caught red-handed! What does my lord husband plan to do? If this concubine entered the Yun family’s door, she would frighten you to death. If I hadn’t been petulant back then, the legitimate wife of the Yun family’s main hall should be me now. Rong’er would also be the proper eldest young master of the Yun family. Xinyue would at most be a concubine—would she still dare to act sour-tempered toward me? How about this—tomorrow I’ll submit a memorial to my imperial father, preparing to remarry you. My chastity was all ruined in your hands anyway. Marrying you wouldn’t be a loss for you.”
Yun Ye touched his nose. Better to forget it. There was no way to reason this matter out with her. Women were born believing themselves to be victims, that they had suffered losses. Who knew when this theory began? In any case, men could never win the argument. This Marquis wouldn’t stoop to the level of women. Flicking his sleeves, he prepared to flee.
“You haven’t even changed clothes yet—where are you running? Lingnan has no marquis reeking of urine.” Li Anlan now knew exactly how far to take such words. Seeing Yun Ye turn to run, her heart felt sour, though her face showed nothing. Two years of torment had turned a proud woman into the little housewife she was now.
He led Wang Cai out from the horse pen. This fellow now went nowhere all day, just circling around the few mares in the pen. Yun Ye had told the stable hands not to let Wang Cai get intimate with the mares here. Southern horses were all small and short. For the sake of Wang Cai’s descendants, it was better to let him endure. A warhorse’s heat lasted at most a month—he could tough it out.
He had only strolled for a short while when he heard someone standing on the railing of Emerald Phoenix Tower, shouting loudly: “I am the madman of Chu, singing of phoenix and mocking Confucius.” Hearing this line, Yun Ye nearly went dumb. Blood rushed to his forehead. To actually encounter Li Bai here—truly fortunate beyond eight lifetimes!
Leading Wang Cai, he entered Emerald Phoenix Tower, preparing to prostrate himself in worship before this idol of his heart. The madam, seeing three men and a horse enter the building, hurried forward to greet them, but was swept aside by Liu Jinbao’s arm. He asked in a low voice: “Who was that man reciting poetry just now? Call him out—my master wants to see him.”
The madam’s professional demeanor was excellent. Even after being pushed aside, she showed no irritation and said with a smile: “Oh my, you’re looking for Xiao Cangsheng! He’s out of money and wanted to skip out on his bill by jumping down from the platform, but Hua Niang grabbed him back. Are you his friend?” The madam asked obsequiously. Yun Ye ignored her, and Dongyu couldn’t speak, so naturally she could only ask Liu Jinbao.
“Bring him out. I have some questions for him.” Yun Ye found a soft couch and sat down, casually placing the pastries from the table by Wang Cai’s mouth.
The madam recognized Master Liu Jinbao. Seeing that even he could only stand behind the young man, she immediately knew what to do.
“Hua Niang, carry your man down! A guest wants to see Xiao Cangsheng. Quickly now.” After saying these words, even she felt somewhat embarrassed. Coming to a pleasure house not to see pretty girls but urgently wanting to see a man—she hadn’t encountered this in all her years.
The loquats in the pleasure house tasted good. Their golden-yellow color was pleasing to the eye. Yun Ye picked up one and slowly chewed it, preparing to wait for this Xiao Cangsheng to appear so he could get a good look at exactly who this person was. Why would he recite Li Bai’s poetry? This privilege had always been exclusively his. Could it be that this fellow’s origins were also unclear and mysterious?
A large, brocade-clothed woman came down the stairs with a thoroughly drunk man in blue robes slung over her shoulder. Coming before them, she placed the man on another soft couch and said boldly: “Noble sir, Xiao Cangsheng is just a down-and-out scholar. His mouth may be rather foul at times, but he wouldn’t dare offend a noble person.” Yun Ye didn’t respond, saying to Dongyu: “Wake him up.”
Dongyu grinned, stepped out the door, and with both arms exerted force to lift up a huge rain-catching urn. The urn was still full of water. Entering through the door, he placed the urn on the floor, grabbed Xiao Cangsheng like picking up a chick, and stuffed him into the water urn without even turning his head. Bubbles gurgled up. Hua Niang grew greatly anxious and wanted to rescue Xiao Cangsheng, but Dongyu’s arm was thick and powerful—not something a mere woman could move. She could only open her mouth and bite down.
Dongyu frowned, flicked his arm once, and flung the large Hua Niang out. She crashed into a flower stand and was pinned under it, crying pitifully.
“Stop… your hand! Whatever it is, come… at me! What kind of man bullies a woman?”
Xiao Cangsheng lay draped over the edge of the water urn, wiped the water from his face, and spoke these words haltingly.
Yun Ye spat out the loquat. Eating too many of these things made his mouth bitter. He wiped his hands, crouched before Xiao Cangsheng, and asked: “Where did that line of poetry come from?”