HomeThe Whimsical ReturnChapter 57: Bribery

Chapter 57: Bribery

The horse king had originally planned to kick Wang Cai away with one hoof, but after smelling the fresh fragrance of the fruit, he stuck his head into the cloth bag to sniff. Finding no problems, he began eating the pears in the bag. Wang Cai happily circled around the horse king, thinking he had already been accepted, and proudly called out once toward Yun Ye’s direction.

“Husband, something’s wrong. The horse king hasn’t urinated—he doesn’t intend to accept Wang Cai.” Na Rimu, who was holding binoculars and secretly watching the interaction between the horse king and Wang Cai, cried out in alarm.

Sure enough, after the horse king finished eating the fruit, he began driving Wang Cai away again, biting and tearing. It seemed he wouldn’t give up until Wang Cai was chased off. Poor Wang Cai returned once again to Yun Ye’s side, gazing at the horse herd below the hillside and calling out continuously, yet not daring to go down. That horse king stood far away on the wilderness, blocking Wang Cai’s path back to the horse herd.

“In this world, there’s no such thing as loyalty, nor such thing as persistence. The reason the horse king persists in not allowing Wang Cai into the horse herd is simply that the price isn’t high enough. But what my Wang Cai lacks least is the so-called price. Right now it’s the lean season between crops—after a horse herd has been hungry all winter, I refuse to believe they can resist the temptation of bean fodder.”

“Liu Jinbao, find a bag of black beans and put it on Wang Cai’s back. Let’s see if this door-knocking brick can win Wang Cai the right to enter.” Yun Ye smiled and beckoned. Liu Jinbao immediately placed a bag of bean fodder on Wang Cai’s back. Yun Ye took out his hand fork and poked four or five small holes in the bag. Round, plump beans continuously flowed out from the holes. Wang Cai lowered his head and scooped up a mouthful. Yun Ye stroked his long face and pointed at the horse herd below. Wang Cai once again approached the horse king tremblingly.

The horse king was furious and came thundering over, preparing to thoroughly teach Wang Cai a lesson. Wang Cai turned and ran, the bean fodder spilling all over the ground. The horse king chased for two steps, saw the bean fodder, and began lowering his head to lick up the beans that had fallen on the grass. At this time, putting on weight was more important. Seeing that the horse king wasn’t chasing anymore, Wang Cai carefully slipped toward the horse herd.

By the time the horse king finished eating the bean fodder on the ground, Wang Cai had already mixed into the horse herd. Countless horses circled around Wang Cai, not because Wang Cai was popular, but because the bean fodder on Wang Cai’s back was too attractive to the horses.

The horse king drove away the horse herd with biting and tearing. Wang Cai remained in place without moving, only the bean fodder on his body cascading down to the ground. Wang Cai even deliberately moved closer to the horse king, letting more beans spill near him.

“Hahaha, the horse king urinated! Wang Cai is stepping on the horse king’s urine stain with his hooves. Now he can go home!” Na Rimu laughed raucously. The various people at the mountain pass were also happy for Wang Cai.

Only Yuan Shoucheng sighed and said, “Nothing more than this—how pitiful that the people of this world differ not from cattle and horses.”

Yun Ye didn’t care whether Yuan Shoucheng would lament or not. His purpose was very clear—he just wanted to let Wang Cai return home. Every year in March was Wang Cai’s mating season. When this time came, Wang Cai’s temper would become extremely irritable, always wanting to run out.

He knew Wang Cai was missing this grassland, but hadn’t expected he would be so attached to this place. Watching Wang Cai frolic on the grass, watching Wang Cai go everywhere to sniff other mares’ rumps, Yun Ye was genuinely happy for him from the bottom of his heart.

With Wang Cai’s matter concluded, half of the affairs in Longyou were complete. Returning to the horse herd was merely a mistaken decision Wang Cai made during his mating season. Most animals rely on instinct to determine their behavior, but humans are different. As individuals capable of thinking and creating, you absolutely couldn’t return to society with just a bag of beans. Perhaps it would take two bags?

At this moment, all of Wang Cai’s thoughts were on the mares’ rumps. Yun Ye couldn’t think this way though. Leading a large group of people through the grassland and following the small river upstream, the huge horse hooves trampled down those obstructive thorns. Yun Ye bent down and picked two red goji berries from the thorns. They had already been dried by the wind. Holding them in his mouth, there was still a trace of sweetness.

For the next ten days, Yun Ye planned to spend his time here. He wanted to know exactly how this spring water differed from other spring waters. If he could find an answer—any answer at all—he would be very satisfied.

“Such a desolate and remote place that even wild beasts are unwilling to linger long—why did you master and disciple choose to settle here? Moreover, the mountain terrain here is treacherous, and it’s a dead land where yin and yang clash. Surviving here requires tremendous courage.”

Yuan Shoucheng held a compass while riding his horse, constantly observing the compass needle. Yun Ye was very critical of compasses. This thing had appeared even before the Han Dynasty. People used it for geomancy and finding tomb sites, but no one ever thought to improve it slightly and turn it into a directional compass. They had used a large spoon on the plate for many years.

“Wood overcomes earth for wealth, water generates wood for nobility, wood sees wood for prosperity, wood generates fire for drainage, metal overcomes wood for killing. Young man, you master and disciple really weren’t particular. This place is not only where yin and yang clash, but also a land of the Five Elements’ punishment and killing. Look here—aside from ghost trees growing here, can you see any other trees?”

“Flocks of birds fly high, herds of beasts scatter in all directions. The water and grass here are much better than in that mountain hollow over there. Look—have those horses ever crossed the stream even one step? Thorns grow everywhere, vegetation has no proper form, the ghost trees here are like ghost claws. Did your master deliberately choose this place?”

For the first time, Yun Ye discovered that Yuan Shoucheng had a lot of nonsense to say, without any trace of an elder’s characteristic of treasuring words like gold. If he could have chosen a place, Yun Ye would definitely have selected his arrival location to be in Yan Zhitui’s bedroom—that way there would have been no trouble at all.

The spring opening was still gurgling water outward. The water quality was clear, like gushing jade liquid. Yun Ye squatted at the spring water’s outlet, scooped up a handful of water and tasted it in his mouth. It was still the same refreshing sweetness.

Yun Ye sat motionless by the spring water. Na Rimu leaned against Yun Ye’s side, also not moving. Wu She selected a clean spot and sat cross-legged with closed eyes. Liu Jinbao led the household warriors to begin pitching tents. This was the destination—the Marquis had just said so.

Yuan Shoucheng led three or five Daoists holding compasses, rushing about everywhere. They wanted to find a clear explanation from the chaotic magnetic field. No incense candles or ritual offerings were needed—Yun Ye believed that heartfelt devotion was sufficient.

Dig—just dig. He must find the reason. This was Yun Ye’s obsession.

The household warriors began excavating. Yun Ye stood by the spring water waiting. The earth in early spring was very soft. There were only very few stones here—most of it was loose sand. Before long, the spring opening became a large water-spouting pit. This way, the workload became very large—they needed to divert the spring water before they could continue digging.

A water channel was immediately dug out. When the household warriors pulled out a glass bottle from the sand, Yun Ye’s nose stung and tears streamed down his face. To still be able to see a flat bottle of Red Star Erguotou at this moment—what more was there to say? If he remembered correctly, this should also be something from his backpack.

Gripping the liquor bottle, there was still more than half a bottle of liquor inside. The cork stopper still had more than half its length tightly plugging the bottle mouth. Na Rimu carefully used her hairpin to dig out the remaining wooden stopper. Without thinking, Yun Ye raised the liquor bottle and took a big gulp. The rich flavor of sorghum liquor was still so mellow. Just this one mouthful of liquor made Yun Ye’s heart expand greatly—he had indeed crawled out of the water.

Yuan Shoucheng snatched the liquor bottle from Yun Ye’s hand in one motion and looked suspiciously at the green glass bottle, asking Yun Ye, “Young man, how could you drink it without even looking? Weren’t you afraid it was poison?”

“This is my thing—what’s there to be suspicious about? Have a taste. In the whole world, there’s only this much left. Don’t drink too much. Let them each have a bit too—consider it that you’ve come to my home and I’m treating you to drinks.”

Wang Cai had returned home, and Yun Ye felt that he had returned home too. Having found half a bottle of liquor to bring out for entertaining guests was very appropriate. Yuan Shoucheng was still hesitating when Wu She snatched the liquor bottle with a swift hand movement and also took a sip, smiling at Yun Ye and saying, “It really is good liquor. After being stored for so many years without spoiling—truly not easy.”

By the time Yuan Shoucheng wanted to drink some, it was already too late. Liu Jinbao and the other household warriors had already drunk the liquor until not a drop remained. Even Na Rimu had gotten a small sip.

Old Yuan touched his nose and smiled awkwardly, saying, “No help for it—the older you get, the more you fear death. Being careful is never a big mistake.”

Today’s excavation came to a close with the appearance of the liquor bottle. The cook began making dinner. When dinner was ready, Wang Cai had also returned. Seeing Yun Ye, he collapsed with a thunderous sound onto the hay the groom had prepared for him. He had little interest even in his beloved thick wine, drooping his head and going to sleep.

Na Rimu giggled as she poked Wang Cai’s ears with a grass stalk, making Wang Cai’s two ears dance like windmills. Yun Ye dragged away the mischief-making Na Rimu. A stallion in mating season must be extremely exhausted at this time.

Old Yuan had even more questions than Yun Ye, always asking about Yun Ye’s past in roundabout ways. Moreover, the old fellow was like a phoenix, only settling in blessed lands, full of worry about finding himself in a dangerous place.

Since he knew he had crawled out of the water, then just continue excavating. This work continued for six days, and they had already dug near the water vein.

Yun Ye still commanded the household warriors to continue excavating. Yuan Shoucheng, however, was like an ant on a hot pan, spinning around in circles. The old fellow hadn’t slept all night last night—observing celestial phenomena, examining earth veins, and manipulating five copper coins all night long. By noon, the old fellow could no longer stay calm. He grabbed Yun Ye’s hand and said, “We should leave. This old man’s heart and blood surge like tides. I always feel that great calamity is about to arrive. Last night the star signs were dim, miasmic energy shot to the sky, the earth veins drifted uncertainly, the Vermillion Bird and Black Tortoise had no fixed numbers anymore—this is a killing formation. Young man, you must believe this old man.”

Yun Ye nodded. He didn’t believe there would be any deadly calamity here. The only ones in danger were the four household warriors digging sand at the bottom of the pit. Since the old fellow said so, he would believe him once. Just as he was about to have the household warriors climb up from the pit, he heard Liu Jinbao loudly say from the pit bottom, “My Lord, I’ve dug up something.”

Yun Ye had just started to lean over the pit edge to look down when he heard a thunderous boom, and the earth began to tremble.

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