Xie Huai stayed at Xia Xia’s community until evening. After work, they took the subway to the city center to go shopping.

As autumn approached, Xie Huai wanted to buy Xia Xia some autumn clothes, but her mind wasn’t on shopping at all. While waiting for their food at the restaurant, she buried herself in a political study booklet. After dinner, during the movie, she didn’t even watch the screen, instead hunching in her seat with her phone dimmed to its lowest brightness, muttering vocabulary words to herself.

When they left the movie theater, the subway had already stopped running. Xie Huai found a well-reviewed hotel to spend the night. Once in the room, Xia Xia suddenly remembered she hadn’t completed her self-assigned political studies for the day, so she put down her backpack and sat in front of the TV cabinet to study Xiao Xiurong’s materials.

Xie Huai couldn’t believe Xia Xia could study even in this situation and was left speechless.

He sat beside her, boredly flipping through her textbooks. After some time, he started feeling drowsy and began nodding off. Xia Xia closed her textbook and came over to kiss him.

“Finished studying?”

Xia Xia rubbed her eyes and mumbled an affirmative: “I’m going to take a shower.”

Xie Huai usually skipped any classes he could and tried to find ways to skip even the mandatory ones. During finals, he barely passed his major courses, scraping by with minimum grades. In the eyes of both teachers and classmates, he wasn’t considered a good student – he didn’t study, wouldn’t follow rules, and was rebellious enough to try anything.

Yi Meixian once suspected he had cheated on the college entrance exam to get into Nan University, as she couldn’t believe someone as poorly behaved as Xie Huai could get into such a good school.

Xie Huai’s scores were genuine; he had studied hard in high school and gotten into university all because of Qiao Ru’s pressure. In Qiao Ru’s mind, Xie Zhisheng’s tragedy was all due to his lack of education. Xie Huai disagreed, only wanting to get through high school and make money. After the college entrance exam, Qiao Ru had a huge argument with him, issuing an ultimatum that if Xie Huai didn’t go to university, she would never let him call her mom again.

Education was a good thing, but studying meant no time to earn money. Xie Huai used to have to repay tens of thousands in high-interest loans every month, and being busy making money left him no energy for classes. He hadn’t sat down to study properly for a long time, and he had read more characters tonight than in an entire semester. He wasn’t used to it, and his head felt fuzzy.

Seeing Xia Xia go into the bathroom, Xie Huai roused himself and went downstairs to buy an iced cola to wake himself up, bringing back two bowls of wontons as a late-night snack.

When he returned to the room, Xia Xia had finished her shower and was sitting on the bed drying her hair, barely able to keep her eyes open.

Xie Huai told her to eat the late-night snack first while he went to take a shower. When he came out, the person who had been eagerly saying she wanted to accompany her husband tonight was already asleep.

Xia Xia always slept against the wall, curled up in a position that showed extreme insecurity.

The wontons on the bedside table were unopened, and there was a thick textbook beside Xia Xia – she must have sneaked in more studying while Xie Huai was showering. Deep in sleep, drool trickled from the corner of her mouth onto the book pages.

Xie Huai didn’t know whether to be angry or amused and bent down to carry her to the center of the bed.

Xia Xia was exhausted from working during the day and studying at night. She fell asleep like a dead pig as soon as her head hit the pillow. In her hazy consciousness, she heard Xie Huai ask, “Are you cold?”

She mumbled an affirmative, and Xie Huai turned up the air conditioning temperature.

Xie Huai held her, letting her curl up in his arms, and couldn’t help saying, “Did I come here to get a room or to watch you study?”

Xia Xia was now working as an intern every day and could only squeeze in study time around the edges. She had become obsessed with studying. Half-asleep, hearing this question, she used her remaining barely conscious brain to think for a moment before answering, “Study, I need to study…”

Xie Huai’s face turned green.

…

Xia Xia thought she was just taking a short nap, but when she woke up and checked her phone, it was already seven in the morning.

Acting on instinct, she jumped up to put on her shoes and get ready for work, but when she put them on, she realized these weren’t her usual dormitory slippers. Xia Xia then remembered she had spent the night at the hotel with Xie Huai. Something suddenly occurred to her, and her expression froze as she turned to face Xie Huai’s calm gaze.

Xie Huai spoke flatly: “I don’t think I’m forty or fifty with loose muscles, declining stamina, and deteriorating sexual function, right? How dare someone secretly fall asleep while I’m taking a shower? Does she think I won’t get angry and make trouble for her, or does she think she can handle my anger?”

Xia Xia paused for a moment, her beautiful eyes rolling expressively in their sockets: “No, I can’t handle it.”

She pouted and tugged at his arm pleadingly: “How about tonight? I promise I won’t fall asleep tonight.”

“Don’t.” Xie Huai bent down to put on his shoes, “I don’t want to spend another night holding you while being hard, unable to do anything, and unable to sleep. If you want my life, just say it directly, don’t torture me like this.”

Xia Xia felt quite guilty: “You could have woken me up.”

She hadn’t been sleeping well lately, with dark circles under her eyes and red blood vessels visible in the whites.

Xie Huai went to the bathroom to wash up, and Xia Xia followed him in. Like an energetic kitten, she kept poking his waist, touching his arms, and finally climbed onto his back, hanging from his shoulders: “Brother Huai, don’t be angry anymore. How do you want me to make it up to you? You can ask anything, I won’t say no.”

Xie Huai glanced at her in the mirror, maintaining his cold expression without speaking.

After brushing his teeth, he went out to pack Xia Xia’s bag, stuffing all those hateful textbooks into it before sitting in a chair with her bag, waiting for her to finish washing her face.

By the time Xia Xia finished washing up, it was already seven-thirty. With work starting at eight-thirty, taking the subway back to Changping would be just right.

Xie Huai walked in front, with Xia Xia following behind. Xie Huai was tall with long legs, a narrow waist, and broad shoulders. Wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, he looked youthful and bright. Even though he was angry with her, he still automatically carried her bag, lazily hanging it from one shoulder. Xia Xia did not attempt to hide her loving gaze as she stared at Xie Huai’s back, smiling foolishly.

Xie Huai stopped at a small cart selling sweet potato pancakes near the subway entrance and pointed at the cart: “I want one.”

Xia Xia quickly took out money to buy him a sweet potato pancake.

While waiting for the subway, Xie Huai finished the pancake and threw the plastic bag in a nearby trash can, speaking slowly: “So this is how good it feels to be coaxed when angry. No wonder you like giving me the cold shoulder so much.”

Xia Xia: “…”

“So are you done being angry?” she asked carefully.

Xie Huai didn’t answer, raising his eyebrows frivolously.

The subway arrived, and he put his arm around Xia Xia as they boarded, finding an empty corner where he trapped her between himself and the carriage wall.

The morning rush hour was crowded and chaotic, with people pressed against each other without an inch of space. The carriage was filled with various food smells – steamed buns, meat pies, fried breadsticks, jianbing – mixed with the odd body odors of various people, creating a strange and unpleasant smell.

Xia Xia was protected in Xie Huai’s embrace, her nose pressed against his chest.

Xie Huai never wore perfume, but he always had a faint plant-like scent, like wet grass after rain being warmed by sunlight – fresh and comfortable.

The subway stopped at a station, and the carriage tilted slightly forward from inertia. Xie Huai held onto the overhead handle, and though he was standing steadily, he deliberately pretended to stumble, moving his body slightly with the carriage’s tilt, taking the opportunity to kiss Xia Xia’s forehead.

Xia Xia immediately said: “You kissed me!”

“No, I didn’t,” Xie Huai lied without blushing, “I’m still angry, who would kiss you?”

Xia Xia looked at him suspiciously, and Xie Huai stared back, his gaze arrogant.

When the subway stopped at the next station, Xie Huai used the same trick, and Xia Xia declared with certainty: “You kissed me again!”

“Stop being so full of yourself,” Xie Huai said, “After what you did last night, I’m being nice by not beating you up, let alone kissing you. Keep dreaming.”

Like teasing a kitten, Xie Huai kissed her once at each stop. He wasn’t angry anymore, but whenever Xia Xia tried to talk to him, he would put on a cold face and ignore her.

After teasing her for a while, Xie Huai couldn’t help but smile.

Seeing Xia Xia puffing up her cheeks in anger, he reached out to pinch her face: “How does it feel to get the cold shoulder? Will you dare do it again?”

Xia Xia said softly: “I won’t dare.”

She held Xie Huai’s hand and felt the scab that hadn’t yet fallen off his hand, asking worriedly: “When will this heal?”

Xie Huai had injured his hand while dealing with Zheng Zhiming. He wouldn’t let Xia Xia see the wound until it had scabbed over and he removed the bandage. He had always said it was a minor injury, but it was a long cut, definitely not something from an accidental scratch. No matter how much Xia Xia asked, he wouldn’t tell her how he got injured.

Xie Huai picked at the dark brown scab: “It will heal when the scab falls off. The doctor said it won’t leave a scar if I apply the medicine regularly.”

“I shouldn’t have let you go,” Xia Xia said quietly. “Getting the USB drive back would have been enough, why did you have to fight with him?”

“Of course, I had to fight him,” Xie Huai said with a smirk. “His wife hit you, so I beat up her husband. If it wasn’t inappropriate to hit women, I would have beaten her up too.”

He ruffled Xia Xia’s hair, changing the subject: “Stop worrying about me, think about how you’re going to get through today. The city inspection team is coming to check street sanitation, your community will definitely make you do manual labor again.”

Xia Xia drooped her eyes, resting her head against Xie Huai’s chest.

Her fingers traced patterns on his shirt, and she suddenly asked: “How did you spend those months in juvenile detention?”

Xie Huai: “Why are you asking about this?”

Xia Xia had always been curious about that period that Xie Huai never talked about.

Qiao Ru had once told Xia Xia that that experience was like a threshold in Xie Huai’s life. After crossing it, it was as if he had been wound up with a spring of rapid growth, transforming from a naive boy into a capable man in just an instant.

But even Qiao Ru didn’t know what had happened to Xie Huai in juvenile detention.

Xia Xia couldn’t explain why she suddenly asked this question. Perhaps it was triggered by thoughts of Xie Huai dealing with Zheng Zhiming. She thought about Xie Huai’s expressions and actions when facing Xia Jun, Hu Shurong, and those two men who had insulted her. She also thought about Xie Huai’s confidence, his flamboyance, and his animated tricks when making money. If she had to explain, she just wanted to know what had caused Xie Huai to become who he was now and develop the maturity that Qiao Ru spoke of.

Xie Huai: “Looking down on Brother Huai for being in jail?”

Xia Xia said: “No, I just want to know. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

Xie Huai raised his eyebrows, thinking carefully.

“It wasn’t much.”

“Eating, sleeping, studying, labor reform,” Xie Huai said. “Got beaten up occasionally, but it didn’t hurt much.”

He smiled: “I know what you’re thinking.”

“You do?” Xia Xia didn’t believe him and asked with a smile, “Then tell me.”

Xie Huai’s expression was mysterious, tinged with playfulness: “If I guess right, do I get a reward?”

Xia Xia: “Yes.”

“What?”

Xia Xia: “You tell me first, then I’ll tell you.”

Xie Huai: “Those days were indeed quite difficult.”

He only said they were difficult but didn’t explain how they were difficult – it was his usual style, unwilling to share his troubles with her. Xia Xia didn’t believe that his brief mentions of eating and sleeping could summarize his entire life in juvenile detention, nor did she believe his claim that he only got beaten up occasionally and that it didn’t hurt much.

“But it couldn’t change me,” Xie Huai smiled. “Is your Brother Huai someone who would submit after just a few beatings?”

His smile was quite arrogant, but somehow Xia Xia found herself smiling too, inexplicably wanting to smile along with him.

“How can a person’s maturity have any clear events or boundaries? It might be from eating a meal, having a conversation, reading a book, watching a movie, or even just looking at the moon before going to bed at night. People come to this world and face so many trivial matters every day, accumulating bit by bit until one day they break out of their cocoon.”

“For me, it was just a moment’s thing, and even I can’t remember which moment it was.”

Xie Huai said: “You think I became who I am now because of juvenile detention? You’re underestimating me. I’ve always been this way. What you see in front of you is the original and complete me, never changed because of anything.”

“That’s what you were thinking,” he said with certainty.

Xia Xia couldn’t help but smile, her eyes curving like two clear crescents, and a phrase floated through her mind.

The world gave him heavy pressure, gave him wounds all over, and exposed him to wind and rain, fierce winds tore off his roof, and huge waves flooded his home, yet he stood in the center of the waves, set up his rudder, hoisted his sail, his eyes still bright, his spine still straight. The world gave up trying to tame him, letting him sail against the current toward the next shore.

Xie Huai said: “Reward.”

Xia Xia came back to her senses and scratched her head: “I haven’t thought of one yet.”

Xie Huai smiled: “Then reward me by having lunch with you.”