December’s End

As Xia Xia walked out of the teaching building, students who had finished their morning exams streamed out in succession, rushing to secure spots in the library without stopping for lunch. By the time Xia Xia emerged, a long queue had formed at the library entrance, making it impossible to squeeze inside.

The winter cherry blossoms bloomed like clusters of pink clouds, transforming the campus pathways into brilliant ribbons of color. Xie Huai sat on the grass in the tree’s shade, spreading out a light blue checkered tablecloth. He took out a thermal lunch box and neatly arranged dumplings, rice balls, and fruit platters.

Xia Xia set down her bag and sat beside him, asking excitedly, “Did you make these?”

Xie Huai picked up a dumpling and held it to her mouth: “Try it.”

Before university, Xie Huai couldn’t cook. During their early days of living together, he thought himself a culinary genius just for making snail noodles. No matter how bad the taste, he would insist that Xia Xia praise his cooking like a food critic. He would get angry if she didn’t praise him, and even angrier if her praise didn’t sound sincere enough.

Xia Xia didn’t know when Xie Huai had learned to make dumplings. Though they looked a bit ugly, the taste was surprisingly good.

“I video-called Mrs. Qiao all morning. She guided me through making them. Are they good?”

“They’re delicious.”

Xie Huai pulled out a bag of shelled walnuts from his bag: “Mrs. Qiao shelled these yesterday and sent them over. She said you’ve been working hard these past few months and these will help nourish your brain.”

“Auntie is so kind,” Xia Xia smiled and asked, “Are you jealous? It seems Auntie loves me more now.”

“What’s there to be jealous about?” Xie Huai said, “Though you stole my mom, you gave me a wife in return. I’d say that’s not a bad deal.”

The sunlight was willful, warming the winter day like spring. When occasional breezes blew, cherry blossom petals fluttered down from above, landing in Xia Xia’s lunchbox, sticking to her dumplings, and being eaten along with them.

Xie Huai wiped a petal from the corner of her mouth: “How was the exam?”

Xia Xia smiled: “It’s just for our school. I could pass the line with my eyes closed. Aren’t you busy today? How do you have time to keep me company?”

The bank loan had been approved last month, and the factory area was under construction. Xie Huai had been so busy he barely touched the ground. It had been a long time since they had sat together and enjoyed a leisurely meal like this.

The clear sky was pristinely blue, and light pink cherry blossom petals floated down to rest on soft strands of hair. Xia Xia looked up, gazing at the bright sun through gaps in the branches overhead. She squinted her eyes, everything feeling peaceful and beautiful.

“There are matters at the factory, but they’re not urgent. I’ll wait until you go in before leaving.”

Like a father waiting outside the school gate for his child to finish the college entrance exam, Xie Huai helped Xia Xia organize her books and stationery.

Xia Xia finished eating and lay her head on Xie Huai’s leg to study. After reviewing English compositions for a while, the warm sunlight made her drowsy, and she fell asleep against him. During the brief few dozen minutes of her lunch break nap, she had many dreams. In her dreams, she received her graduate school acceptance letter, and Xie Huai came to pick her up from school on the pink electric scooter she had given him.

Xia Xia put on her helmet and sat on the back seat.

Xie Huai didn’t know where he was driving to, but everywhere they passed was filled with blooming flowers and surging waves.

Looking out, Xia Xia saw a brilliant future that she couldn’t describe in words.

That Spring Festival, Xie Huai brought Qiao Ru to South City for the New Year. On New Year’s Eve, the small house was filled with a festive atmosphere. Qiao Ru had cleaned the house early, putting up her hand-cut window decorations and red paper lanterns. Xie Huai bought two kumquat plants from the flower and bird market to place at the entrance and also bought a tank of tropical fish.

Xia Xia and Qiao Ru cooked in the kitchen while Xie Huai watched TV on the sofa, occasionally sneaking in to steal some meat.

Qiao Ru slapped his hand, scolding him like a child and telling him to go sit properly. Xia Xia couldn’t stop laughing at the side. Xie Huai felt he was losing face and told her not to laugh, but Xia Xia wouldn’t listen and laughed even harder. Exasperated, Xie Huai grabbed her hand and bit it.

Qiao Ru couldn’t help but scold him: “Don’t bully Xia Xia!”

Outside, fireworks dyed the entire sky red. It was Xia Xia’s first proper New Year celebration in her life. Excited and thrilled, she pulled Xie Huai downstairs to set off fireworks.

The world was silent except for the thundering of firecrackers. Xia Xia held a sparkler, its flames illuminating her delicate profile.

Worried she might catch a cold, Xie Huai went upstairs to get her clothes. Qiao Ru stood on the balcony watching Xia Xia set off fireworks.

Xie Huai walked over, and said, “Look how happy Xia Xia is. This afternoon, she told me this is her first time celebrating New Year like this.”

“Xia Xia had a hard life before,” Xie Huai said softly. “The first year I knew her, she fought with her stepfather and was locked out of home. The second year I knew her, she quarreled with me and went to Hai City, spending New Year alone in a strange city.”

“The third year…” Xie Huai didn’t want to mention what happened during that Spring Festival. He smiled and said, “This is the fourth year, and I’ve finally given her a proper New Year celebration, but I still haven’t given her a home.”

Xia Xia looked up at the sky. The fireworks were brilliant, but not as radiant as her smile.

Xie Huai continued: “Other girls have boyfriends accompanying them shopping and traveling, but Xia Xia was always alone. I’ve been too busy making money to accompany her, yet I haven’t even made much money. When Xia Xia first moved in with me, I could only take her to and from work on an electric scooter. I’d cook at home, and on weekends when I wanted to take her out for a nice meal, she’d worry about me spending money and only agree to eat malatang.”

“It’s not that no one pursued her. Those people could give her far more than I could, but she chose to be with me.”

“Mom,” Xie Huai turned to look at Qiao Ru, “I will be good to Xia Xia for life. After we get married, please don’t let her suffer any grievances.”

Xia Xia passing the written test was expected. When she checked her scores, she wasn’t particularly excited and just continued going to the library to study as usual.

Throughout spring, Xia Xia was preparing her graduation thesis. She wanted to stay at South University for graduate school, and the quality of her graduation thesis would affect her potential graduate advisor’s reputation. The famous professors in the department placed great emphasis on academic ability. If Xia Xia’s thesis was good enough, she wouldn’t even need to apply – professors would directly select her.

In contrast, Xie Huai’s thesis looked like it had been chewed by a dog.

Xia Xia couldn’t bear to look at it. In her spare time, she helped him revise the outline and punctuation. After reading it through once, her head was about to explode.

The factory’s production license had been approved, and the facility was about to be completed and put into use. Xie Huai rarely came home during this period, sometimes staying overnight at the factory when work ran late. The factory wasn’t large, leased through Xu Dalong’s connections at a reasonable rent. Eight factory buildings covered over four thousand square meters, with more than ten production lines that could accommodate hundreds of workers simultaneously.

Today, several machines have just been delivered. After treating the sales representatives to a meal, Xie Huai returned to the factory to learn how to use the machines.

Missing him after not seeing him for several days, Xia Xia bought two portions of fried noodles as a late-night snack and came to find him.

It was already very late when Xie Huai saw off those people. After eating the late-night snack, he continued tinkering with the machines while Xia Xia sat on a nearby box reviewing her books. In the corner near the wall was a tatami mat with a mosquito net hanging over it, where Xie Huai would sleep when he couldn’t make it home.

Xia Xia had her graduate school interview tomorrow, and she reviewed the key points in her hands several times.

Xie Huai finished with the machines and went to wash his hands. When he returned, he hugged her from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder: “Still studying so late?”

Xia Xia yawned: “These are last year’s interview questions. I won’t be able to sleep until I finish them.”

“Won’t be able to sleep without making love?” Xie Huai deliberately misinterpreted her words, lifting her by the waist and walking toward the tatami mat in the corner. “That’s simple then. I’ll help you fall asleep and have sweet dreams.”

“Hey—” Xia Xia struggled, “No, I have an interview tomorrow. No fooling around today.”

“That excuse doesn’t work. You ranked first in the written test. Unless you curse at the teachers or blow up the exam room tomorrow, who would dare fail you?”

Xia Xia pushed back: “Still, I need to finish reviewing this set of questions!”

Xie Huai glanced at the materials in her hand, had Xia Xia lie face down on the mat, and placed the materials in front of her eyes.

He adjusted the small wall light, making the inside of the mosquito net as bright as day, every word on the paper visible.

He smiled: “You can study like this too.”

Xia Xia tried to crawl away using both hands and feet but didn’t get far before Xie Huai pulled her back.

“Let me test your review progress,” his voice was soft. “What are the basic elements of social investigation?”

The April night was cool. Outside the factory, weeds grew wild, waist-high, with clear insect sounds coming from among them.

Thick clouds secretly hid the moon’s light, and the stars’ radiance was so faint it was barely visible.

Xie Huai: “Can’t remember? Looks like Teacher Xie needs to give some punishment.”

“I can—I can remember—”

“…sampling,” Xia Xia said through gritted teeth.

“What else?”

“…questionnaire.”

“Do I have to ask you one by one?” Xie Huai’s voice deepened. “Seems like rote memorization isn’t working. You need some disciplining.”

“There’s also statistical analysis,” Xia Xia sounded close to tears. “Don’t—”

Xie Huai casually tossed the materials aside and lifted her: “Stop studying. Book learning is shallow.”

He smiled mischievously: “Let’s do some practical field research instead.”

Xie Huai was extremely well-known at the college. Not only did all students know him, but he also left deep impressions on teachers. Though he rarely attended classes, whenever he did, he always sat in the front row and engaged most with the teachers. With his good memory and intelligence, his responses in class always offered fresh perspectives.

Many teachers liked him, but his heart wasn’t in his studies, and his frequent absences were too flagrant. During finals, he barely scraped by the passing line. In the teachers’ eyes, this was like watching a precious jade willingly gathering dust, making them both regretful and frustrated at his waste of potential.

Xie Huai paid the price for his four years of negligent studying. On thesis defense day, while other students were questioned briefly, three professors grilled him mercilessly, attacking every flaw in his thesis, and even criticizing misplaced punctuation marks for extended periods.

Walking out of the defense room, Xie Huai felt dizzy and drained, as if he’d been given a second life.

That evening was the teacher appreciation dinner, after which the class committee organized students to visit a nearby bar.

In four years of university, Xia Xia had never participated in any group activities and didn’t want to go this time either. Zhao Shanqi persuaded her: “After tonight, some people might never meet again in their lives. We’ve been classmates, and I haven’t even had a proper meal with you. Let’s go together.”

Xia Xia went, and naturally, Xie Huai went too.

The bar was located on a quiet street, with only a few scattered customers inside. There was no noise or chaos. A resident singer sat center stage with an electric guitar, singing “The Wind Rises.” His clear voice and melodious tune echoed through the space.

The group sat at a long table, and the owner brought beer, glasses, and ice buckets.

In the dim light, Xia Xia’s gaze passed over the familiar and unfamiliar faces before her. Zhao Shanqi’s words “Some people might never meet again” echoed in her ears, and somehow, in this atmosphere, she felt a touch of melancholy.

Li Zhelin, after being a class monitor for four years, had matured considerably. Xia Xia could barely see traces of the boy who had once clashed with Xie Huai.

Zhao Shanqi stood up to pour drinks for everyone, showing none of a rich girl’s delicacy, smiling and talking with everyone.

Zhu Ziyu drank alone in the corner, propping her chin up, squinting her beautiful peach blossom eyes, and occasionally dropping ice cubes into her glass.

Xin Pu sat among the male students, secretly glancing at her. Seeing her drink too much, he went over to take away her glass.

The girls chatted about interesting stories from their school days and gossiped about their counselors, drinking until they cried together. The boys were half-teasing, half-sentimental, raising their phones and threatening to capture their tear-stained makeup. Everyone laughed and talked, gathering to play drinking games and table games.

…”When I first knew this world, with endless fascination, looking at the horizon as if it were before my eyes, I was willing to brave fire and water to walk through it once

Now that I’ve walked through this world, with endless fascination, turning over different faces of time, unexpectedly running into your smile…”

The music flowed gently, making the farewell atmosphere particularly poignant.

Everyone, crying or laughing, stood up to toast.

Xia Xia looked toward Xie Huai, who sat at the other end of the long table. As if sensing her gaze, he looked up at her too.

Though they were in the same environment, they seemed out of place here. Only when their eyes met did they realize that they understood each other best.

Zhao Shanqi brought a glass of beer to him, and Xie Huai stood up.

Between Zhao Shanqi and Xie Huai were twenty-two people, and she had drunk twenty-two glasses toasting her way to him.

Zhao Shanqi’s eyes were red: “Xie Huai, may all your wishes come true and your life be smooth.”

Xie Huai finished his drink and said composedly: “Thank you, you too.”

Xia Xia got up to go to the bathroom but heard voices inside when she reached the door.

Zhao Shanqi was drunk, hugging Zhu Ziyu and crying heartbrokenly: “I haven’t dated for four years. He doesn’t like me, and I can’t like anyone else…”

“What’s so good about dating?” Zhu Ziyu stroked her hair comfortingly. “Look what a mess I made of dating. They’re all just worthless men.”

Xia Xia didn’t go in. She leaned against the bar wall, looking up at the glass chandelier hanging from the ceiling.

The lights were shaped like water bottles, filled with clear water that turned bright yellow when lit by the small bulbs at the rim.

“I once lost myself in the vastness of the world, also indulged in its dream talk, not distinguishing truth from falsehood, not struggling, not fearing ridicule

I once turned my youth into her, also played out midsummer from my fingertips, wherever the heart moves, just let it follow fate…”

She listened quietly to the song for a while until Xie Huai came over, waving his hand in front of her eyes: “Drunk?”

Xia Xia smiled: “No.”

She looked toward the drinking and celebrating crowd: “Look.”

“Watching their revelry is like experiencing their youth vicariously.”

“Not having to worry about tuition, not having to worry about living expenses, being able to learn many skills, take many certifications, make many friends.”

“Being able to go slowly, travel everywhere, waste time, cry when you want to cry, laugh when you want to laugh.”

Xia Xia looked at Xie Huai, and though she didn’t say the rest, he understood.

This was the youth that twenty-year-olds should have, but for her and Xie Huai, it was an extreme luxury.

Xie Huai’s palm rested against her forehead, brushing aside her bangs as he gazed into her beautiful eyes: “Do you regret it?”

“Why would I regret it?”

“If you hadn’t liked me, you could have been carefree like them. There would have been a boy who liked you and cherished you dearly. You wouldn’t have had to wake up early to tutor for money, could have spent whole days reading in the library, gone to dessert shops when tired, and he would have accompanied you traveling, accompanied you doing anything you wanted to do.”

He smiled: “Youth is only half over, it’s not too late to regret now.”

“The evening wind blows through the white strands in your temples, smoothing the scars left by memories, in your eyes, light and shadow intertwine, and a smile blooms like flowers

Dusk covers your stumbling steps, walking to the hidden painting by the bedside, in the painting you lower your head to speak

I still marvel at the vastness of the world, also intoxicated by childhood words, no truth or falsehood remains, no struggle, no pointless ridicule

I finally returned youth to her, along with the midsummer played from fingertips, wherever the heart moves, let it go with the wind…”

Xia Xia tilted her head, the light falling into her eyes, dyeing her pupils a brilliant color. She smiled, her fair arms wrapping around Xie Huai’s neck, her hand pressing against the soft hair at the back of his head, pulling him down.

“No regrets.”

Xie Huai’s eyes were very close to hers; Xia Xia only needed to lift her head slightly for their noses to touch.

“I have you,” she smiled brightly. “You’re worth all the beautiful youth.”

Xie Huai lowered his head to kiss her brow, then held her wrist as they walked out of the bar.

The moonlight was gentle, like a floating veil covering the vast starry sky behind them.

Xie Huai stopped at a vending machine by the road, inserted coins, and got two cans of beer.

The breeze, lights, tree shadows, insect sounds, the red flesh of watermelons at the fruit stand, the sizzling smoke from the barbecue stall.

Everywhere they looked were real and warm scenes of human life, and she was a sweet note in the summer fireworks.

Xia Xia took the beer Xie Huai handed her, looking up to meet his tender gaze.

He raised his hand to clink glasses with her, his voice clear and gentle: “My Xia Xia, may your future be brilliant.”